Summary: Buffy and her sister Dawn are in high school along with the rest of the gang, Willow, Anya, Xander and Oz. Know throughout the entire school, for years their group has been known as THE LOSERS. But not for long. Spike Giles aka the hot new guy recently transfer student from England is going to shake up their world.
Buffy and her friends are leading double lives where they are in a band called Fang, Buffy is the lead singer who likes to be known by her fans as slayer, Dawn aka the bands drummer is commonly known as Bit and Niblet, Oz aka bands guitarist goes by the name of Wolf. No one knew there true identity, they were happy the way things were. But that all changed the day he walked into her life and rocked her safe little world. How long will their secret STAY a secret. Read and find out.
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OMG i am soooo sorry for the late update crindges dont hit me...i hope you all like it... (i'd just like to thank Chriss Nicole for BETAing this story for me:))
Previously:
"Buffy are you ok pet...?" Spike asked. He had been waiting outside of the leisure centre when Buffy came out. Watching as she hugged herself and looked towards the ground as she walked.
"Do I look ok...no...I can't cry in front of Dawn...I-I feel like crying all the time but I can't...I have to be strong for her, for everyone." Buffy looked at the ground and hugged her arm's around herself some more. Looking back up at Spike with teary eye's she continued. "I've been working. I've been busy because I have to, adding more training in... going to the pool every night, god making Dawn lunch and making sure she's awake on time." Buffy let out a sob as her body started to shake. Spike wrapped and arm around her waist in comfort, noticing the group walk out and stand near the doors Spike wrapped his arm around her tighter.
"I have to do this things...because when I stop...then she's really gone" Buffy's body shook with the force of her tears. "And I'm trying...really trying to take care of things...b-but I don't even know what I'm doing...mum always knew." Buffy looked up at Spike with wide eyes. "I have to be mum now. No one else is going to be...who's going to make things better...who's gonna take care of us..." Buffy burst into tears, the worst she'd cried in a long time. Spike pulled her close to him as she buried her head in the crook of his chest. She wrapped her arm's around his waist as she cried harder, if that were even possible.
Faith, Angel, Tara, Connor and Riley all watched the conversation being had by Buffy and Spike. Tara looked at Faith with a sad smile. Angel, Riley and Connor just looked at one another not knowing what to say. They watched as Buffy clung to Spike as if he were her life line, her body being held up in his arm's as she cried. As if Buffy was mother nature herself the clouds opened up with a crack and let a downpour of rain engulf them all. Buffy's shed tears and pain were being told to everyone in Sunnydale as it bucketed down.
"C'mon pet we'll get you home" Spike said directing a sobbing Buffy over to his car. After putting Buffy in the passenger seat of his car he looked up at Angel and the rest of his friends. Sending Angel a look that said "Your gonna need to get your own way home" he climbed in to the drivers seat and started the engine. "You got a long way to go pet but I'll be here, I'll help" Spike silently vowed to himself. Buffy sat staring out the car window watching as rain splashed onto the glass, watching the droplets gather and make streams to the road.
"Why did you have to leave me" She whispered to herself resting her head against the seat and closing her eyes, letting a few lone tears make their way down her cheeks to splash onto her shirt.
Secrets Out Chapter 8:
What was that saying again..."all good things must come to an end"...one minute your world's happy, your surrounded by everything and everyone important to you and then next everything just falls apart, they fall apart so hard you can't ever put them back the way they were. Glancing over at the blonde girl currently sleeping in his car with her head resting against the cold glass causing it to fog up whenever she breathed out, Spike sighed.
Pulling up to a stop outside Buffy's house Spike switched the engine off. Looking again over at Buffy her faced scrunched and she huddled her arms closer around her body as she dreamed. The tears drying on her face. Giving a sympathetic and sad look Spike leant over and brushed a few strands of hair from her face and tucked them behind her ears.
"Buffy, luv were here." Spike whispered leaning towards Buffy. Buffy stretched her arms and legs as much as the seat would let her and turned her head to see Spikes blue eyes locked on hers. Smiling softly she watched as he leant back into his own seat. Wiping the dried tears from her cheeks Buffy sat up and pulled her top down to cover her stomach. It had ridden up as she stretched.
"Thank you for driving me home" She smiled sheepishly and made a move to open the car door. It was still raining heavily and Buffy could only just make out the lights on the front porch. Spike leant over and touched her arm. Turning back to face him Buffy met his sad gaze.
"You know...I-I'm here to talk to...if you ever feel the need to pet. You shouldn't keep emotions bottled up like that." Spike rested a hand on Buffy's that was on the seat between them. Buffy nodded with a sad smile.
"Thanks. I-I'll uh... see you tomorrow ok." Their was a silence between them, neither knowing what else to say. Spike nodded and watched as Buffy turned and opened the door. She ran for the front porch trying to avoid getting wet as much as possible covering her head as she went. Squinting through the downpour Spike watched the front door open and saw the outline of Buffy's form go inside. Only once he was sure she was safe inside did Spike start up the engine and make his own way home.
"Soooooo, I saw you in the car with Spike huh, huh" Dawn smiled raising her eyebrows suggestively as she jumped onto Buffy's bed. Buffy was tucked under the sheets laying on her side. Noticing her sister's lack of acknowledgment and more of a silence towards the statement Dawn started to worry. Anything related to possible kissage with a really hot male usually got Buffy's attention, but not tonight.
"You ok...your quiet, which for you...is not of the norm" Dawn asked crossing her legs so she sat Indian style on Buffy's bed next to her. Buffy looked up from her position at her little sister and smiled softly.
"I'm doing ok, just...everything kinda hit home tonight. Mum being gone... having to plan the funeral. She's really gone and...it's hard. I don't know how to do this Dawny." Buffy said hugging the sheets around her more tightly. Her eye's started to well up with tears as a few dropped onto her cheeks, running down to her pillow. Dawn sighed and moved to hug her sister.
"No ones asking you to do all this stuff Buffy. Giles is here and he's looking after us. We have friends, Xander and Willow. We're all family now, we'll look after each other." Dawn's own eyes welled up with unshed tears at hearing her sister's body shake as tears streamed down her face. Laying down next to facing her sister Dawn smiled softly.
"It'll get better...in time." Dawn whispered in a voice that was not only trying to reassure Buffy but at the same time reassure herself. 'Things would have to get better, they couldn't stay like this forever' Dawn thought as she closed her eyes and hugged her sister. They stayed like that for hours. Hugging each other for support and comfort. Soon the sobs died down and Buffy's breathing evened out as Buffy fell asleep. Dawn hesitantly got up and made her way to her own room. Wiping her own shed tears from her cheeks she lay down and prayed. For things to get better, for everyone to make it through this rough time in one piece.
People dressed in black had cried. Silent tears, others streams down their face for the loss of a loved one. But there were a group of who looked utterly broken. One, a blonde Buffy Summers had pulled herself together and made her way up to the front of the church and taken a seat on a stool in front of a piano. She was saying her final goodbyes. Her mothers closed casket only a few meters from her.
Buffy looked over at Dawn who was seated next to Spike and Willow. Giles, Oz, Xander and Anya sitting in the same row. Tara and Fauth had also shown up, sitting behind the close group of friends in the second row. Buffy started to play a few notes then stopped. "This is uh...I wrote this a few days ago...A final goodbye to the most wonderful person in the world" A lone tear slipped from Buffy's eye. As the rest of the residence in the church looked on with sad faces. Father Caleb nodded at Buffy sadly as he turned to play the starting notes again.
"Forget me not I ask of you, wherever your life takes you to, and if we ever meet again, think of me every now and then. We had just one day to recall, now all I want is something more, than just a fading memory, left wondering what could have been" Buffy's eyes welled up with tears but she refused to let them fall.
"Isn't it a shame, that when timings all wrong, you're doing what you never meant to, there's always something that prevents you, but I believe in fate, it had to happen this way, but it always leaves me wanting whether..., in another life we'd be together, were sure for lucky we can say..., we've always got yesterday" The notes and Buffy's voice grew stronger and then she stopped, just playing the soft notes on the piano. Again her voice was soft with a sad tone to it. She glanced at her mothers casket.
"And as I leave it all behind, your still emblazoned in my mind, when for that very special day, nobody loved me in that way, forget me not I ask of you wherever you life takes you to, and if we ever meet again, think of me every now and then" Buffy played a few more notes as her eyes couldn't hold back the tears any more. Slowly they started to fall from her eyes.
"Forget me not I ask, I ask of you" Buffy's eyes closed as her body racked with a silent sob. Father Caleb placed a hand on Buffy's shoulder as he said a few words, people started to rise and make their way outside as Joyce's coffin was lifted by four men and carried out to where her final resting place would be.
"You did good today Buffy...Your mother would have liked it" Giles said as he hugged Buffy and Dawn. People were only just starting to leave the Summer's house. The wake they had held for their mother after the funeral had been a sad one. People coming up to Buffy saying they were sorry for her loss, trying to make things better but only making it worse by reminding her that her mother was gone.
Smiling sadly at Giles, Buffy nodded. Dawn had gone to the door to see of the last of their 'Guests'. Buffy was about to say something to Giles when Spike came and touched her arm. Turning Buffy molded herself into his arms wrapping her own around his waist. Spike sent Giles a look and he nodded walking away to start cleaning up.
"Can I show you something luv" Spike asked taking Buffy's small hand in his seeing her eyes being raised to meet his. She nodded and followed his lead.
"Yeah sure" Spike smiled softly and led her outside to the back porch. They sat down on the stairs and Spike placed an arm around her shoulders. Buffy huddled into his side.
"It's so quiet at night...so peaceful" He paused and smiled to himself and then continued "When my mum w..." There was another pause "When my mum went I used to come outside at night all the time, just look up at the stars and see her face smiling back at me, knowing she was there watching over me." Spike placed both hands behind him to hold his weight up and tilted his head back...as if he was basking in the stars rays. Buffy smiled softly and then did the same.
"She was the only one of my flesh and blood, now I have no calling I can do no worldly good mmhmm mmhmm" Spike hummed to his own tune. He closed his eyes. Buffy turned to look at him with a blank look on her face. He continued.
"I sit silent, I sit mourning, I sit listless all the day. I've mostly lost the voice to say except, does heaven have enough angels yet mmhmm mmhmm" Spike had sat up again and glanced over at Buffy who's eyes had again welled up with tears.
"I've gone hard and I've gone cold, can't make the pieces of this cracked life fit, please forgive me for wanting to know, does heaven have enough angels yet mmhmm mmhmm" Buffy joined in softly with (does heaven have enough angels yet) and smiled softly at Spike. placing her hand in his Spike gave it a squeeze and continued to sing softly.
"Together oh together, no there be no more of that, I would not dare for myself to ask, does heaven have enough angels yet mmhmm mmhmm" Buffy lay her head on Spikes shoulder as she softly sang the last part along with him, humming softly.
"She was the only one, my own flesh and blood, sometimes I hear her calling straight from he house of god mmhmm mmhmm" Squeezing Buffy's hand again in reassurance that everything would be alright she smiled and squeezed his hand back.
"That was beautiful...thank you" She whispered closing her eyes. From inside the house Dawn and Giles watched the couple, both had tears in their eyes but at the same time they were smiling. Smiling in a silent fact that they knew everything would be alright.
thanx Chriss Nicole for BETAing this story for me:)
originally in the chapter i was only going to get buffy to sing her song which btw is called Forget me not by Lucie Silvas. i know this song is more for a male female relationship btu i was going through my music folders and listned to it and was like sigh it just suited and then i had scrolled through my music some more and found Only one by Tracy and was like OMG why didnt i put that in there first...so i thought stuff it i'll do both but Spike can show some more of his softer side and past with his mother:) anyway i hoped you like it and MAJOR thanx to everyone who has reviewed:) hugs all round