Before the disclaimer, I have a mini-rant to go here.
Arrrrrrrgh! Why does everyone assume Sidra was lifebonded to Navan? People can love without lifebonds! She wasn't lifebonded! She was just in love with him! Just because the rest of my story is THICK with lifebonds doesn't mean all of it is!
Ok, end mini-rant. Sidra and Navan weren't lifebonded, and yes, Sitara is Herald Sidra reborn. I kind of made it bloody obvious, didn't I-grin-
Oh, and just so everyone knows, Kenan isn't shaych.
Disclaimer.
Thoughts :Mindspeech: unless there's a question mark, in which case it's :Mindspeech?
Sitara idly pawed the grass under the trees where she stood, glaring into empty space with intense blue eyes. I can't believe she said that, she fumed, How could I not have defended him-
:Sitara.:
Sitara whirled around, startled at the new presence that had seemingly only just appeared behind her-though she had shielded herself heavily against the rest of the world, so perhaps it wasn't surprising.
Still, her shields were quite useless against the Grove-Born if he really wanted to talk to her. :What? she said, defensively, cracking her shields open to speak the single word to the stallion who stood several feet from her, casually looming over her, which only served to make the whole thing seem more unfair.
:You overreacted.: Kyrith was blunter than normal, and there was definite rebuke in his tone.
Sitara pawed at the ground again, frustrated and wishing absently that she could chew her hooves as she once chewed her nails when under stress. :How could I not defend him? she half-wailed, :Navan is-was-she insulted him, then called me oblivious to-
:You are no longer Herald Sidra, Companion Sitara.: Kyrith's voice was stern and unmoving, :Navan remains in the Havens until he chooses to return here. You chose to become a Companion. The two of you are no longer bound.:
Sitara stopped dead in whatever she had begun to say, freezing with her head in mid-toss. :But I-
Her rebuttal was weaker, this time, as the Grove-Born let his disapproval be known. His logic slowly overpowered her objection. :Companion Sitara, it is no use to Valdemar to alienate your Chosen. Now, Ramya has advised Kamaria to apologize to you, and when she does, accept it without question or refusal.:
Sitara seemed to wilt, the small runner's head drooping. :Yes, Grove-Born.: Her mind-voice was somehow smaller and ashamed, as the reminder of her duty hit her.
But Kyrith wasn't quite finished. :Herald Sidra lives only in memory, Sitara. Remember this.:
With that, the stallion turned away and walked at a stately pace into the trees as Sitara heaved a sigh.
Kamaria had tried all Equitation and the half-candlemark or so it took to unsaddle and groom Ramya to get more out of her lifebonded's Companion, but it seemed futile. "Be that way, then!" she said, at last, at a loss as to how to get Ramya to speak. "I guess I'll just-give her some space, or something, and apologize after she's cooled down."
Ramya's ears pricked in approval, though the mare remained stubbornly silent as she shook all over with Kamaria's last brush-stroke and trotted out of the stable. Kamaria threw up her hands in exasperation and put the brush away.
Slightly sore, since Ramya was wider than Sitara and her gait was just different enough to throw Kamaria off, Kamaria followed Ramya into Companion's Field, hesitated for a moment as she pondered what to do with her free period, and decided to wander off in whichever direction seemed most appealing.
Kamaria headed towards the Terilee, mind at last moving from Sitara and to the earlier topic she had been thinking about-the Chronicle written by Vanyel. She settled automatically into a long stride, hands linking behind her back as Kamaria slowed into a "thinking" walk, a stride that was so similar to the way her own father walked when he was thinking that anyone who knew them both would smile at the resemblance.
It didn't take long for Kamaria to find a bend of the Terilee and start wandering upstream, slowly, as she stared into the water. I'm bound for life to Alain, she thought, It-didn't really hit me until now, I guess. I'm lifebonded to someone I haven't known long, yet…I love him, and if he dies, I die.
Kamaria turned the thought over in her head several times. But then, I wanted to be Chosen, and that's for life. Except…that's every Valdemaran child's daydream, though I suppose I indulged in it more than I probably should have. Kamaria thought back to her near-constant longing for a Companion only a few months ago, and blinked. I suppose a large part of it was that I was lonely. But if I could go back and talk to myself then, I'd probably be exasperated with myself.
Kamaria paused in her stride, a slight frown furrowing her brow. …if that made any sense at all, that is. Where was I?
Oh, yes. Alain. I'm bound to him-something I didn't choose, something I didn't even really think about until…well, until we found out.
But if I had a choice, would I have said no?
Kamaria sat down on a log near the bank of the Terilee and rested her elbows on her knees, pondering the unexpected thought. Would I have said no…
She'd seen Alain all of twice in her life before they'd been kidnapped, but her impression had been a good one. She'd liked his smile, and-well, his personality was magnetic.
Stop there. Think objectively, Kamaria reminded herself as she found herself poised on the brink of lauding her beloved. While always fun, though occasionally slightly embarrassing if she was found with the blank expression that went hand-in-hand with such thoughts, it wasn't helping here. Come to think of it…I was impelled to defend him from the first. When I threw my drink in Vanessah's face- I doubt I would have done that if I weren't bound to him.
Kamaria thought for a moment about the stress of that particular day in general before amending the thought. Well…maybe I would have. I was on edge that day anyway, even without Vanessah aggravating me.
Kamaria rested her chin on one hand and picked up a rock with the other, flicking it into the Terilee with no real expectation for a skip. Surprisingly, though, it bounced from the water's surface twice before sinking.
Actually, Alain isn't even the type of guy I was attracted to before, thought Kamaria, suddenly, I mean, he's considered handsome enough, even by the other Trainees, but if I weren't lifebonded and Chosen, I'd probably be drooling after Kenan. Or Kiril. Of course, I am lifebonded, so that makes the question moot.
Kamaria sighed as she flicked another rock, this time not lucky enough to gain a skip. She flinched as droplets of water from the river splashed up at her, one chilly drip landing on her cheek and making her start in surprise.
This is getting me absolutely nowhere, Kamaria decided, with another sigh, and stood. It's not like I can go back and make it not happen, anyway, and besides…
Kamaria's shoulders quivered in a slight chuckle as she began to walk back the way she had come. Alain's a damn good kisser.
A bare quarter-candlemark of meandering later found Kamaria at Weapons, her next class. The salle was empty as Kamaria strolled in, wondering vaguely where Sitara had got to. Finding the practice sword she liked best-the balance was just a tad better on this one, though it was still mere pot metal-Kamaria began warming up with lunges and slashes of the sword, taking it slowly and picking up the pace gradually.
Soon the movements grew more intricate, as Kamaria tried more complicated slashes, now moving backward and forward as if she dueled an invisible opponent. Suddenly, she executed a fast pivot, whirling and slashing downwards behind her with a "Hah!"
Kamaria did not expect the clash of sword on sword as Kenan lifted his own practice blade to block her slash. "Hello," he said, disengaging the blades with a twist of his own, "Sorry for startling you."
Kamaria saluted her Gift-teacher with her sword and let her arm fall, shrugging. "I got here early, and thought I might as well warm up. But isn't there a younger class right before us?"
Kenan grinned. "Kiril's running them around Companion's Field as punishment for not shutting up all class. I tagged along for a bit, but decided to come back."
Kamaria raised her eyebrows. "Is that a warning as to what will happen to us if we talk?" she said, mildly alarmed.
Kenan's smile widened. "Yes, but you'd probably have to do two laps rather than one," he said, cheerfully. "Care to practice with a partner?"
Kamaria blinked in surprise. "Ah-sure!" she said, "If it won't inconvenience you, anyway."
Kenan, in answer, settled into a braced stance, sword at the ready in some opening position Kamaria had never seen before. "Try not to bruise me too much," she warned, "I've not been training that long."
Kenan nodded, but did not otherwise move. Kamaria feinted and struck-only to have her blade knocked away by Kenan, though her teacher only moved his sword. "You shifted your weight the wrong way when you feinted," said Kenan, returning his sword back to its original position, "And watch where you place your left foot."
Kamaria took the advice with a nod and tried again, striking low at Kenan's shin.
Her teacher blocked it, but this time tried his own blow-far slower than Kamaria had seen him move before, but she accepted that she was definitely not good enough to block Kenan when he moved full speed.
She blocked and struck at him again, only to be blocked once more.
By the time Kamaria's weapons-class filtered in, the two were concentrating on their duel, Kamaria not holding back on her teacher as he patiently returned her attacks and parries, occasionally with bits of advice. Kenan's eyes flickered towards the other class members, but Kamaria remained oblivious to their presence as she lunged again.
Kenan waited her out as Kamaria pressed him with a flurry of blows, somehow all executed with dancerlike grace, blocking each blow with a rather annoying ease. Suddenly, in a fast lunge to the side and a twist of his blade, Kenan smacked Kamaria over the wrist with the "dull" side of his sword, forcing her to drop her own with a yelp. Kenan bowed to Kamaria as she rubbed her wrist and became slowly aware of the other students, and said, "Very good. You're quick and agile, though you're little like me-" he smiled, and Kamaria returned it, for indeed both of them were rather short and slender, though Kenan still managed to be taller than Kamaria, "And I'd take agility over brute strength, personally. But it's time for class to start."
Raising his voice, Kenan called, "The rest of you, get practice-swords and run through basic low, middle, and high blocks. Kamaria, you're warm and there's an odd number-go practice point-work on the dummy, that seems to be your weak point."
About ten minutes later, Kiril returned with a line of younger Trainees, ranging from about eleven to thirteen, all of them gasping for air. Kiril seemed unaffected by his jog around Companion's Field, but then, Kiril looked like he was hewn out of rock, and unaffected by most things. "Don't talk in class," he advised the younger Trainees as they lined up by the barrel to get dippers of water.
"And how was your run?" said Kenan, dryly. Kamaria watched him from the corner of her eye as she lunged and prodded the dummy with the tip of her practice-sword again-it wasn't exactly hard, since Kenan's flame-red hair caught the eye, so Kamaria could see him even in her peripheral vision.
"Wonderful!" said Kiril, brightly, "I led them all the way around Companion's Field, and if they wasted their breath talking-well, that's not my problem, right?"
"And yet you're barely even sweating," replied Kenan, "But then again, I seem to recall a time when someone decided to show off in Weapons, and good old Tori sent you on a candlemark's continuous run around the sal-"
"Hey!" interjected Kiril, glaring at Kenan, "That was years ago! Besides, what about that time when someone got the bright idea to practice slashes on the dummy and broke it in half?"
"I don't recall that incident," said Kenan, blandly, somehow keeping a straight face, "But I do recall when someone thought it would be fun to fire arrows Companion-back into the targets at a gallop and accidentally hit Tori in the bum-"
Kiril choked and went bright red. "It's not fair that you can keep a better straight face than me!" he complained, "Besides, that-I-you-argh!"
By this time, warm-up had stopped and Kamaria had halted her point-work, and all the Trainees were trying to hide snickers at Kiril. Kiril placed his hands on his hips and glared at them. "And not only that, there are witnesses this time!" he cried, "Not enough that you beat me at stones three-quarters of the time, or you always win an argument, but now you win in front of all of them-" his outraged hand-wave took in the giggling Trainees.
Kenan grinned at him. "And yet, somehow I didn't bring that up," he said, thoughtfully, "Because someone decided to try to get the better of me and ended up humiliating himse-"
It was lucky Kenan was so fast, because Kiril let out a cry of exasperation and tried to slap him upside the head. However, once the blond Herald moved, the still-grinning redhead was suddenly over by Kamaria as Kiril caught only empty air. "That's not very nice," said Kenan, raising an eyebrow and waving an admonishing finger, "You're not setting a very good example for the-ow!"
For this time, Kiril had caught up a wood chip tracked from the archery range and thrown it at his friend, hitting him squarely in the middle of the forehead. "Oh, I'm sorry, did that hit you?" said Kiril, as Kenan clapped a hand to his forehead and snatched at the woodchip, which had landed on his Whites, "Funny, one would have thought the mighty Kenan would have been able to dodge-"
By that time, however, no one was able to keep a straight face any longer, and everyone in the salle laughed until their stomachs hurt.
A Weapons class and a Farseeing lesson later, Kamaria walked back to dinner whistling idly, hands in her pockets. She hadn't seen Sitara since just after lunch, so it came as a surprise when the mare ghosted up to walk beside her.
Kamaria stopped whistling and looked at her Companion, reading her mood in the way Sitara held her head. "About-earlier," she said, "I apologize. I don't know what I said to offend you, but-I'm sorry."
Though I really do not understand what that was all about…
They continued to walk in silence for a few minutes, and at last, at the fence, Sitara brushed Kamaria's arm with her nose. :Apology accepted, Chosen.:
Kamaria watched Sitara turn and walk away, then stop to talk to a stallion Kamaria couldn't see very well from her vantage.
With a shrug, Kamaria ducked under the fence and headed to dinner.
The dining hall was as chaotic as ever, cheerful shouts of conversation echoing over the rattling of cutlery, the crackle of the fire, and the footsteps of the servers. Alain was off-duty tonight, though both of the pair had dishwashing afterwards, and Kamaria slid into her usual seat across from him. "Finish that paper?" she said, taking a chicken wing from the platter.
"Finally," Alain said with a heartfelt groan, using the knife to slice off part of the breast of said chicken and taking the wishbone. "It had to be five pages long, and I'd only done the outline before I forgot about it, but it's done."
Kamaria nodded sympathetically and passed him some cider-he looked like he needed it, and Alain proved her right by draining the cup she poured him in one long gulp. Kamaria refilled his cup before she passed the pitcher on. "Anyway, how did Equitation go?" said Alain, "Why did you need to borrow Ramya, anyway?"
"Equitation was fine," said Kamaria, "I'm a little sore, though, since Ramya's wider than Sitara. I was talking to Sitara about Lord Navan and the Sweetsprings blunder-and I still think he's a blithering idiot about strategy-except she was on his side for some reason, and I can't think why, especially since she was listening in all class!"
Alain's face grew puzzled as a server edged past the crowded tables, hands full of roasted vegetables and a pitcher. "That's odd. Navan was advised by several Heralds, but he took the direction he thought no one would predict, and-"
"And thus the blunder," Kamaria finished, "Anyway, she said something about me being insulting and stalked off."
Alain shrugged helplessly as he took some vegetables.
"Weapons was quite entertaining, however," Kamaria remembered suddenly, with a smile. "Kiril and Kenan got into one of their teasing matches again, and at first Kenan won-until Kiril threw a woodchip at him, and it degenerated from there. It was very funny."
Alain chuckled. "Wish I'd seen it. But instead Kiril had the Bard going over spear-work, and Kenan was tutoring a student one-on-one for my class."
Kamaria nodded as Alain held up the wishbone, and took the other end. "Got your wish?" she said.
Alain nodded, and they pulled-Alain ending up with the larger half. "Aha!" he said, looking at the piece of bone, "This bodes well for me if wishes come true on chicken bones."
Kamaria raised her eyebrows, but Alain shook his head, smiling. "Can't tell you, or the wish won't come true."
Kamaria nodded in agreement and stole a choice piece of carrot, perfectly roasted, from Alain's plate. She ate it before he could retaliate, and snickered at her lifebonded's indignation.
The rest of dinner was occupied with conversation with Tara and Edim, who were debating something about the way pirates from Evendim should be dealt with. Kamaria's day caught up with her and she drifted, only half-listening to the conversation as she finished her dinner. Alain looked at her as she took a last drink from her cup and sighed. "We'd best head to dishwashing," she said.
The pair descended to the kitchens, followed by a few younger Trainees than they and one older girl who drifted along, eyes slightly unfocused as she pondered something. Alain and Kamaria ended up in the scrubbing sink, where they used brushes to get the particles of food from the dishes before passing them to the rinsing tubs. The work was soapy, but not unpleasant, for it was hot water and the steam relaxed Kamaria's sore muscles. :I was thinking today, she said to Alain, opening their mindlink, since the sound of sloshing water rather drowned out conversation.
:What about?
:Well…our lifebond, actually.:
There was a flare of interest, somehow mingled with uncertainty, from Alain's end. :Really? Do enlighten me.:
:It sort of went in circles, mused Kamaria, thinking aloud, :But it boiled down to this…:
:If you had a choice to be lifebonded to me-some unChosen noble at the time who you'd met all of twice in your life, what would you have picked?
Alain's eyes widened, and he faltered in his scrubbing for a moment before attacking the bit of crusted sauce with new vigor. :Hard question, he said, :Let me think about that for a while. What…what would you have picked?
His mindvoice was definitely unsure now, and Alain's shoulders were drooping slightly. Kamaria glanced at him, and suddenly felt slightly guilty for putting him through this. :I would have said yes, she said, :I haven't regretted one moment of being bound to you.:
Alain's shoulders straightened, and he looked over at Kamaria, blue-green eyes meeting her own silver in slight surprise and gratitude. :I-uh, thank you, he said, :And I…:
He suddenly smiled, taking Kamaria's breath away for a moment before he spoke again. :Yes.:
Kamaria realized that she had been tense about what Alain might have said, and relaxed suddenly, relieved and awash in another wave of love for him.
The pair stood still until one of the younger Trainees flicked water at Alain, who was nearest the rinsing tubs, with a "Hey! You two just going to stare at each other all day?"
Alain's head snapped around as he glared, stung. "You young Trainees need to learn respect," he said, loftily, rising to the boy's jibe, "I'll have you know that-"
"You lifebonded types need a candlemark out of every day to moon after each other?" shot back the boy, eyes wide in "innocence."
Said eyes soon had to squeeze shut, as both Kamaria and Alain attacked with soapy dishwater, flicking him mercilessly with the droplets from their wet hands until he surrendered.
Well, hope you enjoyed that-and I would have had this up yesterday, except then I realized that sleep is a good thing and I had a math test today.
Hope you're all liking the rewrite, and because I'm generous, EVERYBODY gets virtual brownies for at least attempting to guess Sidra and Sitara's connection! (For those who didn't read the top, Sitara is Sidra reborn.)
Lurks in Shadows: Yup. SitaraSidra. Except not, as the Grove-Born's lecture said.
Shahanna: Always glad to be of service in the humor department!
Moondance K'Treva: Not exactly the 90 millionth, but still, basically everyone guessed!
drools momentarily at the thought of having 90 million readers-
Anyway. Next!
Lee Trynace: Well, I don't like the first part that much either, but hopefully the rewrite is making it better! Kenan isn't shaych, though he's been called that, and Kiril-well, Kiril's quite a bit more lighthearted this time around!
Dark Hermit Kaelin: Well, I didn't know about that story. And if I did, I forgot. I just went and picked the name!
Herald Kelsin, Lydia2, and Jerry Unipeg: All of you are quite correct!
Herald Jacquelle: Sitara was Sidra, once, except they were not lifebonded. Just in love. People can love without lifebonds. Like Firesong and Silverfox!
Pearl of the Moon: Thank you, and you get extra virtual brownies!
Queen's Own: They have had lifebonded Heralds. Just not lifebonded Trainees as young as Kamaria and Alain. Mardic and Donni were a few years older, I believe, and were almost in Whites anyway. And yes, Vanyel was asked to write about the loss, since he would know it best.
Oceanmate: Yeah, it was easy, was it not? And Kenan has no Foresight whatsoever. Just Farsight. Though the two can be confused…
Des Felidra: I really hope you like my HP story! And I want reviews on it, because I've worked on it for almost a year… -puppy eyes of ETERNAL DOOOOOOM-
Kathleen McRory: I believe I emailed you about that.
Silentmaid, Spellsinger, and pocketmuffin: First of all, I heart pocketmuffin's name. Secondly, Sitara is Sidra reborn as a white not-horse. And…yeah!
Senashenta: It's fun to confuse you. –grin- Can't wait for your next chapter! And thanks, I will start checking your LJ!
Now, do leave a review, I heart all of you and Kenan, and go read Eagle's Sight! Please?
Fireblade K'Chona
(Just a random thought I had in QuickEdit...if you moosh the words "Authors note" together, it looks sort of like "Authorsnot.")