I just got the soundtrack to 300 and the songs for this chapter are from there. They're Message for the Queen and Goodbye My Love

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Chapter 9

There is no remedy to love but to love more – Thoreau

After spending so much time with Beast, I thought I knew him rather well. I knew that, after the events of the previous day, he'd avoid the places where we'd usually spend our time together. He would stay away from places that I might decide to visit, finding his way back only when he was sure that I'd be nowhere near there. Meanwhile, he'd brood over past events and torture himself with terrible thoughts. And what better place to torture oneself than the place where they were rejected?

I was right. The door to the garden was propped open, and when I peaked outside I could see the Beast standing out with his back to me, gazing over the flowers. I took a deep breath and, before I could change my mind, I walked silently down the path.

"Beast," I murmured, gently placing a hand on his thick arm.

He whirled around. "Adara?"

"I was hoping that I would find you here." I murmured.

He cleared his throat, grasping my hand as it rested on his arm. "I'm so sorry. I never meant-"

"It's alright." I said softly.

"You… forgive me?"

"Of course."

He stood silently for a few moments, unsure of what to say. I gave him a smile to reassure him and murmured, "Shall we go for a walk?"

"If you wish."

He released my hand, but I left it on his arm. He led the way through the garden in an uncomfortable silence, glancing at me from time to time to make sure that I was still beside him, despite the proof of my hand on his arm. I couldn't keep my mind on anything other than how I hurt him…

"Beast," I murmured, pausing and removing my hand from his arm.

He stopped as well, turning back to face me. "Yes?"

"I wish I could undo what was done the other day. We both did things that we regret… and I hurt you, I know." I stopped and looked into his ice blue eyes. "I'm so, so sorry. I wish I could make it up to you."

"No…" his voice was defeated. "It isn't your fault… it was mine. It was wrong of me to assume that just because I love…" he faltered, clearing his throat. "Well, I suppose it doesn't matter."

"It does matter." I took his massive paw, wondering at its largeness in comparison to my tiny hands. "I don't to cause you any pain…"

Beast looked into my eyes for a time, and then hung his head. He closed his eyes, murmuring, "You haven't caused me pain. You have been a rare glimmer of hope in my unfortunate future… but…" he opened his eyes, and a tear ran into his fur, glittering when it caught on his cheek. "It is foolish for me to hope."

"No," I replied, brushing the tear away and cupping his chin, tilting his face so his gaze met mine, "Hope is never foolish. Hope is what keeps people going… it's a magic that can keep you from believing that all is lost."

The Beast granted me a small smile, gently taking my hands in his paws and removing them from his face. "I wish I felt as strongly as you did."

I glanced towards his paws as their fur brushed against my skin, remembering how terrifying their claws had been when I first met him. It was funny how spending so much time with Beast made me forget how frightening he had once been.

"What is it?" Beast asked, noticing my gaze and pulling his paws away. "Do they frighten you?"

"No." I replied. "I was just thinking about how I don't see you as a Beast anymore."

"I do." He sighed, staring hatefully at his paws and muttering, "And I think I always will."

I caught his paw before he could move away, touching the fur on his paws. It was warm and rough against my fingertips, like a bear rug my father had bought when we were still rich. I ran my fingers through the fur, whispering, "You weren't always like this, where you?"

"No." He replied.

"Then what happened to you?" I asked. "Is there anything I can do to help you?"

"No." Beast murmured, avoiding my eyes. He pulled his paw from my grasp and turned to go, murmuring, "No… there's nothing you can do for me."

"Beast," I called after him.

"Yes?"

"Please…" I closed the distance between us in three quick steps, murmuring, "I don't want you to avoid me, just because of what's happened in this garden. It would break my heart if we pretended that nothing happened between us and we just drifted apart." I grasped his sleeve, adding, "I don't want you to stay away from me because of this."

He smiled sadly, murmuring, "Adara, I couldn't stay away from you if I tried."

-

Molly and Emily where astonished at how Adara and Torin where getting along. They spent every spare moment together, reading, walking in the garden, or talking. Every day it felt as though the curse was closer and closer to being broken… but, as much as Adara seemed to care for the Beast, love was never brought up again.

They knew that, to break the spell, Adara had to love Torin back. Friendship wasn't enough. He knew that, and they could feel that he had lost all but a faint glimmer of hope, a glimmer that was ignited into a roaring flame whenever Adara was near him.

They hoped and prayed that she would be able to break the spell soon, because they knew that, if Torin did not turn back into a man, he wouldn't be able to live any longer, no matter how much Adara's company meant to him.

-

"She doesn't…" Morna was whispering. "Still, after…"

"I know." Emily snapped.

"What happens if…?"

"I don't know."

"But we'll be trapped."

"I know."

I wondered, for the thousandth time, what they where talking about, but whenever I asked they told me that they couldn't tell me. Besides, it was well after midnight and they'd be furious to see that I was awake.

But I couldn't sleep. Two weeks after Beast's proposal, I had a new problem to contend with. Now, every time I managed to fall asleep I dreamt of my family and woke up sobbing. I missed them more than I would have ever though possible. I wished I could take back every complaint that I had ever had about them. My annoyance at their antics was nothing compared to my sorrow at not seeing them anymore.

I closed my eyes, wishing that I could see them again, if only for a few hours. If I did, I knew I would be able to rest easy again.

-

Torin knew without a doubt that Adara was troubled by something. She still laughed and smiled for him, but he knew the smiles were false and her eyes always held a sad look. Was it something that he had done? Was there something he could do to fix it? When he pressed, she only said that she was tired.

But I need to help her, he thought, resolving to interrogate her until she told him what it was. I need to make her happy again.

-

A week or two after my dreams had started Beast invited me out for a walk in the garden as the sun was setting. I wore my brown dress with the necklace he had given me, and he wore the same clothes he usually did.

I watched as the colours stretched across the sky, wondering if my family was watching the same sunset and thinking of me. I tried to put them from my mind and enjoy my time with Beast, but I couldn't help but wonder about them. Did they ever think of me anymore?

As the last colour faded from the sky and was replaced by the light from the stars and the moon, the Beast whispered, "Adara, is something the matter?"

"No, of course not." I tried to smile, "I'm just tired."

He shook his head. "Something is the matter."

"Nothing's the matter."

"Adara, you can tell me."

"There's nothing to tell."

"Yes, there is."

"No, there isn't."

"Adara, please don't lie to me." He replied with a sigh, "I can see it in your eyes: something is troubling you."

I shook my head. "There's nothing…" I should have stopped there, but the next words slipped from my mouth. "It's just…"

"What?" Beast asked, "You can tell me anything."

I closed my eyes and tears began to prick at their lids. What could I tell him without hurting him more than I already had?

"Adara." He led me to the bench off to the side, surrounded by the darker red roses. "What's the matter?"

I shook my head, putting my hands to my face. "I can't…"

"You can." He promised, "I can't bear to see you sad like this. I love you, Adara." He wiped the tears away with a gentle paw, carefully keeping his claws from touching my skin, whispering, "I just want you to be happy."

"I…" I looked away from him, cursing both my weakness and his kindness. "I miss my family. I just… I wish I could see them again…"

He glanced from my face to the roses around us and to then towards the castle. With a sigh, he murmured, "You… you would leave me?"

"No. I don't want to leave you." Tears broke free from my eyes and ran down my face. My lips trembled as I sobbed, "I just… I don't know what I want."

"Adara, Adara." Beast whispered. "It's all right." He hesitated for a moment, then put an arm around me, murmuring, "If you'd like… I can show them to you."

I wiped my eyes, pulling close to him. "You can?"

He nodded. "Come with me."

I followed the Beast as he led me into the castle and down the dark hallways, turning left here, turning right there, and silent most of the time. I clung to his paw like a child. Finally we stopped in front of a door that I had only seen once: his study.

The Beast let go of my hand and opened the door, ushering me in. There wasn't much inside: just a mirror, a chair, and a desk covered with an old moth-eaten cloth. The Beast brought me right up to the mirror and said, "Ask to see your family."

I gazed at the mirror. It was an old cast-iron thing with cracked glass, and it was covered with dust. I could see the Beast standing behind me, nodding reassuringly.

"I want to see my family, please." I murmured.

Suddenly, I was looking not into the mirror, but through a window and into a very familiar cottage. My family was sitting around the fire while father read to them. Their faces where gloomy, but other than that, they looked exactly the same… at least, they did at first glance. A gun was hung above the door, and there where a few expensive trinkets in the house that I had never seen before. Aisling had a proper doll, Briac had a pair of spectacles, and Rowena had a pretty necklace around her neck.

"I don't understand." I murmured. "We were poor… how…?"

"I sent a saddlebag of gold home with your father." The Beast answered.

I recalled that fateful day when my father came home months before and handed me a heavy saddlebag. In the week before my leaving, no one had thought to look inside. They must have found it afterwards.

"It's very little, compared to losing you," he murmured, "But I knew you were poor and I never expected anyone but your father to return. I thought a little money might help with his loss."

I smiled sadly, remembering my argument with Father over money. I would never have won if we'd discovered the gold before I left. "My family…" I brushed my hand over each of their faces as a sob built up in my throat. I leaned my head on the mirror, whispering, "I wish I could be there with them…"

The mirror went back to a reflection of myself and I slid to the floor, tears streaming down my face. The Beast knelt beside me, taking my hands again.

"Adara," he whispered, "I didn't mean to make you so unhappy…"

"I know." I murmured, pulling away from him, "But for my whole life, they where all I had…" Sobs tore from my throat, "And I'll never be with them again."

The Beast sighed and seemed to mull over something for a few moments. After a while, he began to speak, his voice quiet.

"I can offer you one thing… though it is far from what you desire." He sighed, his eyes troubled. "You want to go back to your family for the rest of your life. I can't give you that… but… I can send you back for a month. But only for one month, Adara. If you don't return by the close of that month…" the Beast's eyes closed. "I will die."

I stared at him, forgetting to wipe the tears from my face. "W-what?"

"In the morning, you will find a horse ready for you. Take him, and ride to your family. He'll get you there in a day's ride." Beast replied, ignoring my question. He helped me up, continuing, "Spend a month with them, but please, not a day more. Then, you must come back."

"But… you'll die?" I repeated.

His eyes moistened and he gave me a sad smile. His next words where barely more than a hoarse whisper. "I love you, Adara. I cannot live without you."

"Oh, Beast." The most tenderness that I'd ever shown the Beast was a touch on the face. Now, for the first time, I threw my arms around him and hugged him tight. I closed my eyes and let my head rest on his chest, letting his gentle presence calmed me. "Thank you so, so much. I will come back in a month, I promise…"

The Beast tensed in my embrace for a moment, then allowed himself to put his arms around me, holding me just as tight. He leaned forward to rest his head on my own, curling protectively around me.

I loosened my grip on him slightly and he drew away, embarrassed by his show of emotion. He pulled back, clearing his throat and refusing to let me look into his eyes.

"Go now," he murmured, "You need your sleep. I will say goodbye to you in the morning… but promise me, Adara, that you will return in a month."

"I swear." I whispered.

He nodded, and then gestured shakily to the door. "You must leave me now."

I nodded and left. The Beast watched me leave the room, and then closed the door behind me. I thought I heard a sob from behind the door, but I didn't pay much attention. I was too exited: after all, I was going home to see my family.

-

In my mind, this is where Torin truly falls in love with Adara. Of course he was in love before, but this is where he's totally, hopelessly obsessed: when he's able to let her go no matter what the cost.

I just want to clear something up. I realised that, earlier in the story, I said that Torin can't die. What that means is that he can't die by his own hand and he can't die of natural causes (like, you know, getting old). But love is strong enough to kill, and that's another way that love affects the curse.