Disclaimer: violence, language, angst, and possibly hints of yaoi.
Author's Note: Here comes the aforementioned yaoi! -gasp- it's RaPr!!
Chapter 13
pretending
In the end everyone agreed to hear Kim's idea out. She explained her reasons for everything and didn't miss a detail. It was a long while but every point of the plan was vindicated. She even brought out some plans she'd been working on secretly for weapons that would rain down needles full of any liquid on the enemy and inject it straight into the body of whoever it hit. Those would by far be the most effective weapons to use but then again Zim could get caught in the crossfire. So she brought out what she'd been working her hardest on. An outfit that looked exactly like his uniform but was made of woven metal so that the needles couldn't penetrate it. The best way to keep his head safe he already had installed in his pak.
Professor Membrane looked at the little alien in amazement. "You've really thought it all out haven't you? Even going so far as to use human tactics to defeat them. Truly impressive. Anyone to call you useless is by far wrong." She blushed brightly at the praise. "Well, most of it was preexisting ideas I just used them to suit my purpose." She smiled modestly, digging a toe of her boot into the ground. "That's exactly what I mean Kim. You are by far more resourceful than anyone I've ever met." She beamed at that statement and continued to lay out plans for everyone.
Everything was in place hours later. Kim contacted the tallest from Zim's base where they hadn't spent anytime at in the past few months. She made a good show of being breathless and acting flustered and urgent. It was Purple that finally answered because it was Kim's signature calling instead of Zim's. "My tallest urgent news! The leader of Resisty has landed on Earth and is making an alliance with the humans as we speak!" Kim huffed breathlessly waiting for an answer. "And that means what to us?" He asked slowly. He didn't seem to get the implications and Kim promptly did a face palm.
"My tallest do you have any idea of what they could do to you with more than one human on their side? If one human can best two Irkens repeatedly..." she let her voice trail off suggestively. "Wait a minute. Are you saying they might actually be a threat?" He couldn't keep the sarcasm out of his voice. She smiled and pulled her brother bound and gagged from off screen. "This traitor here was aboard their ship when they landed. She took a vial of water and cruelly poured in on his face. He proceeded to scream wordlessly into the gag,writhing in agony at the small amount of water as it ate away his skin.
Purple stared apathetically at the so called traitor. "So what does that mean?" She smiled a sickeningly sweet smile. "I'll show you." She poured another vial on his gloves. Purple watched without interest. "So what?" He said rather impatiently. She smiled wickedly. "Both vials contained the same substance my tallest. It eats through Irkens like acid yet leaves all else unscathed." She waited a moment for that to sink in. Purple's eyes shot wide. Finally a way to torture the Irkens that failed in their duties without having to worry about containment. No more needing to buy more rope or chains because the acid ate them away. Purple let out a low purr. "My dear you are wonderfully sadistic. If I weren't in a relationship I'd have you in a 'heartbeat'." He traced her cheek on the screen with a dark chuckle. "Is there anything else you'd like to tell me little darling?" He made a churring sound as he said the last bit.
"No but Zim might have something to interest you my tallest." She pointed the screen over to where Zim was standing with Nar at gunpoint. Nar was cursing at Zim and screaming as he was roughly shoved into the screen. "Say it. They're watching." Nar spit at Zim who dodged it nimbly. "Not unless you take me to them face to face." Zim seemed to think on that. "Only my tallest can decide whether or not they want to keep you as a slave." Purple's eyes went wide at the sight of Nar and he immediately called Red over. "Red Zim caught us a play toy! Nar no less!" Red's eye bugged out rather impressively at the sight. "Activate the teleporter now. Purple." Red whispered it against the other's antennae. "They also built a special present for you my tallest. A monument to the almighty tallest. You can display it in the main room of the massive until you can get it transported back to Irk or you can keep it on board the massive to display your greatness!" Red looked at Zim smiling. "We'll beam it aboard right away. For once I look forward to seeing you Zim."
Red cut the call at that and dragged Purple back into the big plush bed, in an even better mood than before. "Do you think they noticed anything?" Purple looked at Red as He began nibbling the other's antennae. "They only saw our heads Pur." Red moaned at having his antennae nibbled and they shivered so hard they made a buzzing sound. Red grinned lazily at the other while stroking his cheek. "One of these days I'll turn you into a female just so you can bear my smeets." Purple whimpered. "Why do I have to bear the smeets?" He was only being sarcastic of course and would willingly bear Red an army of smeets.