Eheh. A very belated chapter 2. There really shouldn't be such a drastic wait in the future. This one is dedicated to Gracia-chan, Nolah de Fanel, Soelle, KrazyGlue, and Siverrain. You guys made me understand why everyone wants reviews so badly. You all are what prompted me to continue this, thank you!

(As a side note, chapter one was tweeked a bit, and I'm much happier now because of it )

"I want dango."

"No. No dango for you. Dango is what started this whole mess."

"But I want-"

"Too bad, I want ramen." Iruka cut in, glaring at the female jounin as Kakashi seemed to wilt between the two.

In a rare show of maturity, he had suggested they go out to lunch to hammer out some of the fine details of living together. While he was not a particularly organized person, the murderous intent radiating from the academy teacher had been enough to convince Kakashi he should at least make an effort to placate the teacher. Anko was, of course, no help at all. Sex drive and the promise of money had her groping him at every turn, all the while grinning wickedly at the scandalized looking Iruka. While Kakashi was no prude and certainly didn't mind the acts of public indecency, he had been wacked on more than one occasion because of what Anko was doing to him. His bruised skull throbbed morosely at the injustice.

Even more unfortunate, his odd show of responsibility seemed to only fuel Anko and (more shockingly) Iruka's childish behavior.

"Well no one cares what you want, because you were named after a sea creature!" Anko declared triumphantly.

"Oh, good one, Anko. That was a particularly pertinent blow- I'm certainly the only one in the group with a weird name."

"You're the only one in the group that's still a chuunin."

Kakashi reflected tiredly as he held them both by the scruff of their necks that he expected the school teacher, at least, to have more endurance for petty taunting.

"Knock it off, both of you. It's like watching a reenactment of Naruto and Sasuke. We will eat onigiri."

"But-"

He whipped out Icha Icha in a clear gesture the discussion was over. So help him, if he had to get the bells out, financial security for the rest of his life was not worth it.

It was over far too quickly. The missing nin was desperate from the rapid approach of swelling chakara, and was still somersaulting in an evasive maneuver to dodge four wickedly barbed knives when he felt another mind rocket into his skull. The bitch took complete control of his body, so that a bird-masked Konoha ANBU had ample time to assault each and every one of his three hundred and sixty-one tenketsu. His hope slipped away with his fleeting chakara. The last thought the missing nin had before unconsciousness took him was vague relief that he wouldn't yet have to face the shame of being caught and bundled in under three minutes.

"Is it just me, or was this one more of a pussy than we usually get?" the dog-masked ANBU questioned. He was lazily strapping the unconscious nin onto a large white hound, who had only moments before been another masked ANBU operative.

The cat mask scoffed. "What are you talking about? You didn't even do anything. The mutt there was the one who sniffed him out."

"And I was the one who trapped him," contributed the panda mask.

"But I obviously played the largest role. As soon as I had his mind, this battle was over." The grin on the cat mask matched the ANBU's tone.

"Can we please stop this pitiful pissing contest and get back to the village?" Bird-mask growled.

The cat tsk-ed. "Language, Captain. Goodness, there are ladies present."

The Captain gave a wry grunt before turning abruptly, his long brown hair smacking the cat on the exposed side of her face.

"Neji, you asshole, you did that on purpose!"

"Ah ah- breaking protocol with using names. Code fourteen. You know the punishment- dinner is on you." The panda and dog cheered.

"Goddamn it," the cat muttered.

"Language, Cat." Even hidden behind a mask, his smirk was evident.

"I liked you a lot better when you had no personality at all."

"Insubordination. You are buying dessert."

"Abuse of power. You're paying the tip."

"Motion to stop this riff before we get stuck with any sort of tab," put forth the panda.

"Motion granted!" The dog replied with cheer.

Dinner assured (regardless of who shouldered the bill), Konoha's best ANBU squad took off towards the hidden village in good spirits from the easy capture. Perhaps it was this, or the non-resistant target, or simply residual adrenaline from the fight, but for some reason they made it back to the towering walls and conspicuous red gate in record time.

"Now the question remains- ramen or barbeque?" Tenten questioned as they slowed their pace to a leisurely walk. Akamarau morphed back into a nondescript ANBU member and slung the unconscious missing nin over his shoulder. Then rest of the members put on their cloaks and pulled up their hoods. Maintaining anonymity and all that jazz.

"Gotta be ramen. I haven't had it in at least 18 hours," Kiba replied.

"Very well," Neji consented after a few more moments, somehow managing in those two words to express how utterly sick of ramen he was. "Take our guest over to Ibiki for a chat, Dog. The rest of the team will do a quick check-in with the Hokage. We'll rendezvous at Ichiraku's at seven." He knew it was too much to hope the ramen stand was still in ashes. He was about to say more when one of the gate guards called down to them.

"ANBU unit one Captain! You and as many of your subordinates as possible are to report to the Hokage immediately!"

"Working on it," Tenten huffed, but the message spurned them into action. It was highly unusual for the Hokage to request their presence when she knew they would pop up to report anyway. In a blur, Kiba and Akamaru departed for the inquisition compound as the remainder of the unit took off for the Hokage's tower.

Ino let out an irritated growl as they leapt across Konoha's roof-scape. "If we have a mission, I'm going to tell her to shove it. First giving us boring field duty- we are so above that- and then giving us a mission as soon as we finish? Unacceptable. I have a date with a pedicure after dinner, and not the return of Uchiha Sasuke himself could tear me away from it."

Tenten shot her a grin from behind the panda mask as they neared their destination. "A pedicure? Are you serious? That's as cliché as me saying I need to get home to polish my weapons."

"Yeah, well, we all know you won't be rubbing anything else-"

Tenten's hand strayed dangerously towards one of her scrolls.

"Knock it off, both of you." Stupid byakugan, seeing everything. "Just because we are all slightly annoyed at the prospect of postponing dinner doesn't mean you two can slip back into your teenage-snarky personas. It took over a year to get over that. No regression, that's an order." Stupid more-talkative-and-attentive Neji.

"Sorry," Tenten said as they entered the building. It wasn't a spiteful apology either. Weirdly enough, she and Ino had become fairly good friends.

"Yeah, me too, but seriously, I think you need to get laid fast-"

"No one will be laying anyone," Neji ground out as the doors to Tsunada's office swung open. She regarded them with a broad smile.

"I beg to differ."

Abrupt halt, I'm sorry! I'm working on not making my chapters so long. I'm hoping this, in turn, will prompt me to update more regularly. As always, comments and criticisms make me one pleased panda, but thank you to everyone who simply reads my story as well. You all give me warm fuzzies.