Disclaimer: Naruto DOESN'T belong to me...

A/N: Revised - 07.17.07

BRIIIIIIIINNGGG! Sasuke jumped when he heard his alarm clock ring... Well, actually, it was Naruto's, but what did it matter? He rubbed his eyes and looked around. Then, he spotted the calendar and realized it was Valentine's Day already! He jumped out of bed and scrambled to pull his clothes on. It was only until he walked out of Naruto's apartment and everyone started gawking at him did he realize that something was wrong.

Ichiraku (which was right across the street from Naruto's aparment; wow what a surprise), was where Naruto was in right now with Hinata. So, it just so happened that Sasuke's ultimate rival saw him...

With heart boxers over his head, his usual blue shirt where his pants were supposed to be, leg warmers on his arms, and toothpaste not completely rinsed from his mouth.

"OH-EM-GEE SASUKE! WHAT IN THE NAME OF TSUNADE-BACHAN ARE YOU DOING?" Naruto, of course, screamed loudly, enough for all of Fire Country to hear.

And Sasuke, who had only seen Naruto and Hinata, barely noticed a few other people in Ichiraku too. "Oi, Naruto, what're you yelling abo-" Sakura was sitting in a few seats away from him and turned around, and saw...Sasuke, the fasion disaster.

"S - s - sakura!" Sasuke stuttered, stared, and turned red and SUPER bright, thus barely noticing the rest of the Konoha 11 was also there plus one Kyoshio and Temari, who all started busting out in laughter.

--

"Sasuke! Get out here!" Naruto screamed. Sasuke had locked himself in Naruto's apartment and wouldn't come out, after he had gawked for a while at Sakura and ran away quickly, prompting the Rookie 11 (minus Sakura, of course, but plus Temari) to follow him in 'concern' for Sasuke's personal safety. However, any attempt that they would try to make to bust down the door was gotten rid of by Naruto, for fear of his lovely door and claiming he would not be able to replace it due Jiraiya emptying his (adorable) froggy wallet. "Neji, what's the teme doing?"

"BYAKUGAN! Hmm...it seems that...he's..." Neji turned around quickly and uttered out, "Trying to get into normal clothes."

"Glad I didn't tell you to do it, Hinata-chan."

Ten minutes later... "SASUKE ARE YOU DONE YET?"

"Jeez, he's like a goddamned chick, taking that long." The lock clicked and the door swung open, with a still red Sasuke.

All of a sudden there was a poof, Kakashi appeared (sort of, cause seriously, who in the ninja world isn't used to big poofs?) dramatically in the middle of the group, his nose in one of his little dirty books.

"Kakashi-sensei? What're you doing here?"

"Oh, the Hokage told me to come tell you that there'll be a dance for all nin, and you're invited! It starts at five this evening, don't be late. Oh, hi Sasuke."

"Wait, wait Kakashi-sensei, do you mean to tell us that we have what, only seven hours to go shopping and get ready for this dance!?" Ino demanded, to the horrified looks of the boys, whose eyes had bulged when she had said 'only seven hours.'

"Err... Tsunade-sama decided this spontaneously this morning, so don't look at me," the experienced nin shifted a bit uneasily under the glares of the girls.

"Well, we could've had a little bit of a warning!" Ino went on. "I mean, a dance for all the nin, and there's gonna be all the decorations to take care of. Then, alerting everyone, and dances are soooo complicated and they have a whole bunch of planning that goes on behind them, and she just spontaneously decides this!?"

"Calm down, Ino!" Temari hissed. "No one wants to hear you complain about something you don't even have to worry about!"

"But I have to worry about it! If it's a bunch of crap, then why would I want to waste my time going there!?"

"Who gives a damn!?" Shikamaru decided to step in and proceeded to stand in the middle of them, sighing, "Troublesome," every now and then.

"Girls," Sasuke grumbled. Turning his attention to Kakashi though he asked, "Is it a Valentine's Dance?"

"I believe so. Not sure though, but I do remember seeing a bunch of pink and red decorations in a corner in the Hokage office.."

Sasuke turned to Naruto and proceeded to scream out, "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

--

"It's okay, Sasuke." Naruto was awkwardly patting him on the back. "Just go with some other girl. There're a ton of them out there."

"But I want Sakura!" (This came out whiny.)

"Well, yeah Sakura-chan's a great girl! She's pretty, nice, and not some sissy, but you have a whole fanclub! Why not just choose someone from there? You could try and make Sakura jealous!"

"Won't work," Sasuke mumbled. "I can feel it in my gut. Seriously, I felt something in my gut when you said that."

"Ahh, creepy. Well, it's still the most plausible idea we have!"

"You know what plausible means?" Sasuke said, spinning around and glaring at Naruto.

"Umm..."

"Now that I think about it, I don't think you used it in the right kind of sentence... or did you?" He went back to mumbling to himself.

"You can't just wallow in self-pity all the time, look what happened to Gaara!" Naruto pointed out.

--

The Kazekage and Hokage were in the middle of a very heated discussion, and Gaara was in the process of saying something with lots of heart and banging the table when he suddenly sneezed out of nowhere (it wasn't even cold)!. "Bless you," Tsunade said.

"Someone's talking about me," Gaara growled, narrowing his eyes.

--

"If I'm not allowed self-pity, what am I allowed?" Sasuke wailed, head in his hands.

"Nothing, you teme! However, I guess you could be allowed to, I don't know, actually do something for a change?"

"Like what?"

"Well, I guess we could come up with a plan to get Sakura-chan to go out with you." Sasuke laughed at that thought. Naruto, the big dobe, come up with a plan? "I don't mean me. I mean Shikamaru, Neji, and the guys. The girls too, they're pretty useful sometimes. But you wanna see if they could come up with something?"

Sasuke sighed, staring up at the sky. Well, on one hand, it was better than doing nothing, but on the other he just didn't wannaaaaaaaaaaaaa! But his gut was 'telling' him to go with this plan. Stupid gut. One day I'm gonna get you removed, he thought silently. "Alright, let's go Naruto."