a/n: I know, it's been a really long time. I hope you enjoy this clip show!
The Beginning of a New Era: The Sequel
"Uh! There must've been something in the bathroom that made me get all nasal. AH! You hear that? Ah! AHHH!" Janice said after coming from the bathroom.
"I told you we should've ditched her." Monica whispered to Chandler.
"Anyway, we were at the part where Ross made a list." Janice inquired.
"Yeah, well, Ross tried to get Rachel's affection and trust back. But it didn't really work out…" Monica began.
---
ROSS: Y-ello. No, Rachel's not here right now, can I take a message? Alright, and how do we spell Casey, is it like at the bat or and the Sunshine Band? OK, bye-bye. Hey, who's this uh, this Casey?
PHOEBE: Oh, some guy she met at the movies.
ROSS: Oh really? What uh, what does he want with her?
CHANDLER: Well, I'm guessing he wants to do a little dance. . . ya know, make a little love. . . well pretty much get down tonight.
ROSS[puts the message in the cupboard I don't know, I don't get, I don't get it, I mean, wh, wh, two months ago Rachel and I were like, this close. Right now, what, I'm takin messages from guys she, she meets at the movies? I mean this, this Casey should be takin' down my messages, ya know, or, or, Rachel and I should be together and, and we should get some kind of me, message service.
PHOEBE: Hang in there, it's gonna happen.
ROSS: Wha, OK, now how do you know that?
PHOEBE: Because she's your lobster.
CHANDLER: Oh, she's goin' somewhere.
PHOEBE: C'mon you guys. It's a known fact that lobsters fall in love and mate for life. You know what, you can actually see old lobster couples walkin' around their tank, ya know, holding claws like. . .
ROSS: Would you look at that guy, I mean how long has he been talking to her. It's like, back off buddy she's a waitress not a geisha.
PHOEBE: I think she's OK.
ROSS[Rachel, laughing, puts a hand on the guy's shoulder Look at that, look at that, see how she's pushing him away and he won't budge. Alright, I'm gonna do something. [walks up in the middle of their conversation Excuse me, are you Rachel?
RACHEL: What?
ROSS: I'm Ross Geller. Wha, I'm, God in your add you said you were pretty but wow.
RACHEL: What are you, what are you doin'?
ROSS: Oh, oh my God, is this the wrong day? I don't believe it, uh, well, hey, I guess if it works out we'll, we'll have something to tell the grandkids.
MAN: Sure will. I've uh, gotta go. Take care.
ROSS: OK, see ya later, nice meeting you. [man leaves You're welcome.
RACHEL: What?
ROSS: I was saving you.
RACHEL: Saving, saving, saving me from the pleasant conversation with the interesting man, saving me?
ROSS: Oh, see from where I was sitting I uh. . .
RACHEL: OK, Ross, listen to me, I am not yours to save.
ROSS: But, you are.
RACHEL: What?
ROSS: Uh, uh, well you're, umm, you're my lobster.
RACHEL: OK, you know what, are, are you being like, the blind date guy again?
ROSS: No no, you're uh, you're my lobster. See um, lobsters, uhh, in the tank when, when they're old, uhh, they get with, uhh, they walk around holding the claws. In the tank, ya know, with, with the holding and. . . Uhh, Phoebs you wanna help me out with the, the whole lobster thing?
PHOEBE: Do the claws again.
ROSS: Rach. OK, forget, forget the lobsters OK. We're, let's talk, what about us?
RACHEL: Ross, there is no us, OK.
ROSS: No, but. . .
RACHEL: No, listen to me. I fell for you and I get clobbered. You then fall for me and I again, somehow, get clobbered. I'm tired of being clobbered, ya know, it's, it's just not worth it.
ROSS: Well, but, but. . .
RACHEL: NO but Ross. We are never gonna happen, OK. Accept that.
ROSS: E-except, except that what?
RACHEL: No, no, ACC-cept that.
ROSS: Oh. [To Phoebe I, uh, I gotta go…
---
"Her lobster!? That Phoebe really is one-of-a-kind." Janice said.
"Yeah…" Monica told her.
"But wait, it gets better. Monica's parents took all her old stuff from her room and sent it to her…along with a prom video."
---
RACHEL: I can't go to my own prom without a date, I can't, it's too late.
MONICA: If you're not going then I don't want to go either.
ROY: Oh, I'm gonna kick Chip's ass.
MRS. GELLER[to Ross on the stairs I have a wonderful idea. You should take Rachel to the prom.
ROSS: Doubtful.
MRS. GELLER: Jack, give me that. Talk to your son.
MR. GELLER: Your mother's right. Take her, you can wear my tux.
ROSS: Dad, she won't want to go with me.
MR. GELLER: Of course she would, you're a college man.
ROSS: I don't know.
MR. GELLER: Well, c'mon. Don't ya want to find out?
RACHEL: I can't believe I don't get to go to my own prom, this is so harsh.
ROSS: OK. Hold my board.
MR. GELLER: Atta boy. [Ross scrambles upstairs to change
ROSS: OK, you guys, ya know, I think we've seen enough, let's turn it off.
ALL: No, no, no.
ROSS: OK, fine, well I'm not gonna watch, alright.
MR. GELLER: C'mon kid, let's go.
MRS. GELLER: Ahh, are you hadsome.
MR. GELLER: Let's show 'em.
ROSS: Uh, just a sec dad. [to himself OK, be cool, just be cool. [walks down the stairs and grabs the flowers out of the vase on the endtable OK dad.
MR. GELLER[going downstairs Rachel, ready or not, here comes your knight in shining. . . oh no. [Chip has shown up and the four are leaving
RACHEL, MONICA, ROY, and CHIP: Bye.
MRS. GELLER: Oh, dear. Jack, how do I turn this off?
MR. GELLER: Press the button.
MRS. GELLER: Which one? Which button, Jack.
MR. GELLER: The button, the button.
MONICA: I can't believe you did that.
ROSS: Yeah, well.
[Rachel, seeing what he did for her, gets up, walks across the room, and kisses Ross
PHOEBE: See, he's her lobster.
---
"Wow. So, this is where it began to kick up?" Janice asked.
"No. See Ross cheated on…" Monica began.
"He cheated on Rachel!? If I would've known he was a cheater, I never would've gotten involved with him!" Janice said.
"How well it would've been for all of us…but no. He didn't cheat on her…they were technically on a break…" Chandler said.
"What!? So if they're on a break he can just sleep with whomever?" Monica asked.
"Is this really the thing to be talking about at the moment?" Chandler asked. "You see, Rachel had gotten this fantastic job. And it was keeping her real busy…with a co-worker named Mark. And that kept Ross really jealous."
---
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Ross is eating the picnic as Rachel comes home from work.
Ross: Hey.
Rachel: Hi. Look um, about what happened earlier...
Ross: No, hey, well, I-I completely understand. You were, you were stressed.
Rachel: (throws her stuff down) I was gonna give you a chance to apologise to me.
Ross: For what? For letting you throw me out of your office?
Rachel: You had no right coming down to my office Ross. You do not bring a picnic basket to somebody's work! Unless maybe they were a park ranger!
Ross: Yeah, well excuse me for wanting to be with my girlfriend on our anniversary, boy what an ass am I.
Rachel: But I told you, I didn't have the time!
Ross: Yeah, well you never have the time. I mean, I don't feel like I even have a girlfriend anymore, Rachel.
Rachel: Wh, Ross what do you want from me? You want me, you want me to quit my job so you can feel like you have a girlfriend?
Ross: No, but it'd be nice if you realised, it's just a job!
Rachel:Just a job!
Ross: Yes.
Rachel: Ross do you realise this is the first time in my life I'm doing something I actually care about. This is the first time in my life I'm doing something that I'm actually good at. I mean. if you don't get that...
Ross: No, hey, I get that, okay, I get that big time. And I'm happy for ya, but I'm tired of having a relationship with your answering machine! Okay, I don't know what to do anymore.
Rachel: Well neither do I!
Ross: Is this about Mark?
Rachel: (shocked) Oh my God.
Ross: Okay, it's not, it's not.
Rachel: Oh my God. I cannot keep having this same fight over and over again, Ross, no, you're, you're, you're making this too hard.
Ross: Oh I'm, I'm making this too hard. Okay, what do you want me to do.
Rachel: I don't know, I don't know. Urrrgh! Look, maybe we should take a break.
Ross: Okay, okay, fine, you're right. Let's ah, let's take a break, (goes to the door) let's cool off, okay, let's get some frozen yogart, or something.. (opens the door)
Rachel: No. (Ross is standing in the doorway.) A break from us.
(Ross looks at her, then leaves slamming the door behind him.)
Chloe: I want you to met some friends of mine. (Introduces him to Chandler and Joey) This guy is my hero, he comes in with some stuff he wants it blown up 400, we said we don't do that, and he says you gotta. And y'know what, we did it. And now anytime anybody wants 400, we just say 'let's Ross it!'
Chandler: And that's the only colour that comes in.
Issac: Yo, Chloe, do you have a quarter for the condom machine?
Chloe: Oh! (storms off)
Chandler: So, what are you doing here? I thought tonight was your big anniversary dinner.
Ross: Yeah, little change in plans. Ahh, we're gonna break-up instead.
(Chandler and Joey stare at each other in shock.)
[Scene: The Philly.
Joey: So what are you gonna do?
Ross: What can I do? One person wants to break-up, you break-up.
Chandler: Hey, no way! Come on, this is you guys, call her and work it out.
Ross: Oh come on, we just had this huge fight, all right, don't I have to wait a while?
Chandler: Hey, this isn't like swimming after you eat, pick up the phone!!
(Ross goes to call her.)
Chandler: Y'know that whole swimming thing is a myth.
Joey: Yeah, tell that to my Uncle Lenny.
Chandler: Why? What happened to him?
Joey: Nothing, he's just really believes in that.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Mark is there, opening Chinese food boxes.
Rachel: Oh, and then, we got into this big, stupid fight. I just, it was awful. I told him he treats me like a park ranger, or something, oh and then I told him I wanted to take a break, I don't want to take a break.
Mark: Wow. I'm sorry. Eggroll?
Rachel: No. (grabs an eggroll) And then I called him, and he wasn't there.
Mark: Well, then he's, he's probably just, out.
Rachel: Oh, thank you that's very helpful, I'm glad you came over.
(The phone rings and Rachel answers it.)
Rachel: Hello.
Ross: Hi! It's me.
Rachel: Hi! Oh, I'm so glad you called.
Ross: Really? I've been thinking, this is crazy, I mean don't, don't you think we can work on this?
Mark: Hey, what do you want to drink?
Ross: Who's that?
Rachel: Nobody.
Mark: Is it okay if I finish the apple juice?
(Rachel mouths 'Shoot!' or something similar.)
Ross: Is that Mark?
Rachel: Umm, honey, look he just came over to...
[Cut to The Philly.
Ross: Yeah! Got it! (slams the phone down, and walks back to the bar.)
Chloe: Hey, dinosaur guy, look at you, so sad. Come dance.
Ross: Ah, that's okay, thanks.
Chloe: Hey, you don't have to smile. You just have to dance.
Ross: Look, I don't feel like dancing, I feel like having a drink. Okay?
Chloe: Oh, okay. (to the bartender) Hey, two beers. (sits down next to him)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's, Rachel is next to the bay window again, Mark has left.
Rachel: (picks up the phone and calls Ross) Oh, be home, be home, be home, be home, be home, be home. Be home. Be home, be home, be home. Oh, you're not home.
[Scene: The Philly, Ross is dancing with Chloe.
Chloe: Still no smile?
(She kisses him. Ross leans back for a second, and then they both kiss, more passionately this time as U2's With or Without You plays in the background.)
---
"Wow…that must've been so hard to deal with." Janice said.
"Almost as hard as dealing with you…" Chandler replied.
"Oh, ahahhhaaa! Chandler, you little funny-bug!" Janice said.
"Well later that year, they did hook up again, to break up the very next day. And then years later they had a child. Which was, in Monica's words a product of a bottle of Merlot and a five year old condom." Chandler said.
"Yeah, and just some years ago they got back together. It was very 'Action Movie' y'know: he chased her to the airport…"
Phoebe: (screaming) RACHEL!!
(Rachel comes back to the gate.)
Rachel: Oh my God... What.. What are you guys doing here?
Phoebe: Okay, you're on.
Rachel: What? What? Ross, you're scaring me. What's going on?
Ross: Okay, the thing is..
Rachel: Yeah?
Ross: Don't go.
Rachel: What?
Ross: Please, please stay with me. I am so in love with you. Please, don't go.
Rachel: Oh my God.
Ross: I know, I know. I shouldn't have waited 'till now to say it, but I'm.. That was stupid, okay? I'm sorry, but I'm telling you now. I love you. Do not get on this plane.
Gate attendant #2: Miss? Are you boarding the plane?
Ross: Hey, hey. I know you love me. I know you do.
Gate attendant #2: Miss?
Rachel: I - I have to get on the plane.
Ross: No, you don't.
Rachel: Yes, I do.
Ross: No, you don't.
Rachel: They're waiting for me, Ross. I can't do this right now, I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
Ross: Rachel?
Rachel: I'm so sorry.
(She boards the plane.)
Ross: I really thought she'd stay.
Phoebe: I'm sorry.
(Phoebe hugs Ross.)
Rachel: (on the answering machine) Ross, hi. It's me. I just got back on the plane. And I just feel awful. That is so not how I wanted things to end with us. It's just that I wasn't expecting to see you, and all of a sudden you're there and saying these things... And... And now I'm just sitting here and thinking of all the stuff I should have said, and I didn't. I mean, I didn't even get to tell you that I love you too. Because of course I do. I love you. I love you. I love you. What am I doing? I love you! Oh, I've gotta see you. I've gotta get off this plane.
Ross: Oh my God!
Rachel: (on the answering machine) Excuse me?
Air stewardess: (on the answering machine) Miss? Please, sit down!
Rachel: (on the answering machine) I'm sorry. I'm really sorry, but I need to get off the plane, okay? I need to tell someone that I love love them.
Air stewardess: (on the answering machine) Miss, I can't let you off the plane.
Ross: Let her off the plane!
Air stewardess: (on the answering machine) I am afraid you are gonna have to take a seat.
Rachel: (on the answering machine) Oh, please, miss, you don't understand!
Ross: Try to understand!
Rachel: (on the answering machine) Oh, come on, miss, isn't there any way that you can just let me off...
(The message is finished. Ross jumps over to the answering machine.)
Ross: No! No! Oh my God. Did she get off the plane? Did she get off the plane?
Rachel: I got off the plane.
Ross: You got off the plane.
(He walks over and kisses her.)
Rachel: I do love you.
Ross: I love you too, and I'm never letting you go again.
Rachel: Okay. 'Cause this is where I wanna be, okay? No more messing around. I don't wanna mess this up again.
Ross: Me neither, okay? We are - we're done being stupid.
Rachel: Okay. You and me, alright? This is it.
Ross: This is it. Unless we're on a break.
(Rachel gives him a look.)
Ross: Don't make jokes now.
(They kiss again.)
---
"And they've been together ever since." Monica said.
"Wow, what a roller coaster ride, huh?" Janice asked.
"Yeah, and that's it. Monica and myself should get going…" Chandler said.
"No! Wait, tell me about how you two got together!" Janice said.
"Well, we'd love to, but we have dinner reservations, so." Chandler said.
Just then the Maitre D' of the hotel restaurant came into the lobby and said, "Party of two: Bing?"
"Yes! Yes, that's us!" Monica yelled.
"It'll be about 30 more minutes."
"Son of a bitch!" Monica said.
"Make that an hour," the Maitre D' replied.
"So I guess you have sometime…" Janice said.
"Well, we have to do something." Monica said, then to Chandler: "We HAVE TO BE DOING SOMETHING! Why can't I think of anything?"
Chandler sighed and sat down, "It all started in London."
THE END.