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Author's Notes: Hehm... Wow. Don't kill me. I know I haven't updated this fanfiction in like forever. There was just so much going on! I mean, first with the books being so awfully translated, and then me moving, and getting all new sorts of classes and FINALLY starting to write the Naruto fanfiction I've been dying to write since I first watched the series a year and a half ago… My website also completely crashed, losing me 400 files which I had to spend MANY, many hours re-coding from scratch… Oh, and I started making an anime. Yes, a real one, with real voice actors and a soundtrack. Aw, the wonders of university technology! Oh, and my cat died. So anyway, that's my long list of excuses. Basic summary, I'm really sorry I took this long, and you have a very good friend of mine to thank for this update. If it wasn't for her incredible strangling powers, this chapter would never have gotten done. (That was not a joke.) I hope you enjoy this chapter. It's not the best, and I mean that literally, but it's not the worst. This is what you get when my interest wanes because of pathetic translations by the evil that is Tokyopop.

Disclaimer: It took me six months to write one chapter. If I was the real author, and I did this, there'd never be a series. Bottom line: I can't write this properly, so there's no need to sue me.

Background Music: Watashi no Taiyou (Hungry Heart Wild Striker!)

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Cloaks
By Sarehptar
Chapter Ten-
Death Dance Interlude

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Things were never the same. I thought I had done something untouchable, something perfect in the eyes of all. What, in truth, had I done? My light eyes, my dark heart failed miserably to perceive the impact. Human blood underneath your pale human fingernails.; mortal life drying in the space between the soles of your feet and your dark boots. Pierced veins spilling directly into your heart... I made you a murderer. Revenge. Revenge. Redemption stolen. How was I know what I had incited there? I was a youkai. I didn't understand humans. I still don't. For me, for all youkai, all things have purpose. Every murder, every battle, every instinct serves a greater aim; even if that aim is only to survive, all things rest on unchanging, eternal goals. A youkai's dreams—to eat, to live, to survive, to carve from death and sunshine an existence worth living...

Human beings are so different. Your lives are too short for greater goals; tiny flashes of momentary light in an unending and impenetrable darkness. You, who expect death around every corner, cannot possibly hope to live lives like youkai. Death... I never thought I would ever have to face the like of it. I always presumed I would live to the end of the world—maybe even beyond then. And I came to believe you would always be there, a given, a crooked viridian-eyed smile that was as I was: unending. But even the years, even the eternal youth did not make you any less a human. Where I moved on the youkai plain, the plain of understanding where time soothes everything, you moved only to a human extent: time was ever an enemy, life in the end held little value.

I was blind. I thought immortality could change your basic nature. But humanity is not a disease that can be cured by cheating death. You still were prey to human feeling, human desire, human ignorance. Blind mortal feeling that shocks me even when I find myself suffering from it. Lust more than any others became your mortal crime. Lust for life, for perfection, for stability, for blood! My greatest sin is there, lain bare. In that one moment in the forest, blood drying in crimson raindrops on my bone white cloak; that one moment where I bowed to childish whim... It was as if the devil himself had sunk claws into you. How could I ever have believed I'd protected you, healed you, seared mortality from your flesh by allowing you to sully those infant hands of yours?

I made a murderer out of a child, and I thought I had done something good. I have always made myself into an angel. An angel of bloodshed, but a thing nonetheless an untouchable and whole, above others. If I had, for one moment, stopped to think about the things that truly required my attention—the freedoms and wills of humans; of Dragons—I know I would not be here, the object of regretful and hateful eyes. If I had stopped to think that the rush of death and battle might excite in your weak human passions a desire for death that paled my own, I would never have taken you there that night. If I had seen in Rath a confused child, a frightened child... If I had ever thought to look beyond my own expectations... Selfish. So selfish—I made myself the core of a slowly revolving tempest, devouring others and burying them thoughtlessly below; played with others like a grand puppeteer. If I had for one second thought to consider the world from a pair of leaf green eyes, or a pair of crimson red... How many could have been spared? How many could have gone on with oblivious, undarkened lives? How happy could we have been?

How happy were you that night, with that broad, clear smile splashed across your bloodied face? How happy were you when the last of his blood washed away, when you closed your eyes to sleep in the castle of an angel, far away from the castle of the corpse? How white were the walls in your dreams? How many times did you replay that scene in your mind? How glorious did you make that graceless death dance? Three hundred years later, today, how do remember your first murder? I don't remember mine. Human, demon, fairy? My memory fails me. Five centuries of death have made the first strike meaningless. Five centuries of life are now made meaningless by a single decision. Or was my life pointless to begin with? In the end, how much have I changed this realm? The faeries will return, you will die, the thousands who fell beneath my claws will be forgotten... Arinas has begun to bloom again. In another five centuries, will children be told bedtime stories of Dragon Knights and the fallen angel?

"Master Kharl?" The voice was far away, quiet, but latent with a quivering excitement. "Master Kharl?" It was your voice, from beyond my carved bedroom door. The morning sunlight filtered too cleanly through the window, too bright and warm for the night it had been born from. The sky ought to have been red, stark, with a watery grey sun rising through a bloody mist. Why did the day give no indication of the goings of the night? The orange moon had stolen away all the sin? "Breakfast is ready." You called again, rapping sharply on the fleur de leis above my doorknob. The impatience finally forced my pale eyes from the window, and sluggishly, not from fatigue but simply because there was no need to rush, I dragged myself to the door.

You were dressed already, and 'tsk'ed at my lack of proper day attire. I admit, my choice of night clothes always had been a bit eccentric. The first time I'd come yawning into the hall, you'd accused me of dragging the bed sheets out too. A little laugh escaped me, and your impossibly green eyes blinked slowly up at me, missing the humor. It had taken a good ten minutes to convince you that someone could sleep in so much material, and not get completely tangled up.

"I'll be down in a minute." I mumbled, half into the oak doorframe, and half through my pale hand that independently found its way up to rub my eyes. A quick nod and you scurried away, expertly choosing the correct turn and stairwell that would take you to the kitchen.

The sun seemed just as warm in the kitchen, promising a windless day. I could see your wide, angled leaf eyes darting up from the syrup drenched pancakes, intently peering through the dusty glass of the high windows. How like a bird you looked, pale face and yellow bangs bobbing ridiculously as you swooped to peck pastry from your fork and then lancing back up just as quickly. I almost laughed, unable to stop myself from being amused by your human antics. If you had wanted me to miss your wistful stares, you'd failed miserably.

The warm day beckoned to you as it never would to me—like moth to flame. Humans are all like that, inexorably drawn to light. Warmth of skin... Do they see it as a brief respite from the chill that death might bring? To stare into the white sun, is it, for mortals, a brief taste of immortality? What was the sunlight for you then? You, my immortal human... How was it to feel the light on skin that would never age; to stare at the sun with eyes that would never fade? Yet you never seemed to miss it, the mortal love of sunshine. Dyed with the crimson colors of night, and you still smiled into the sun as if light meant something. Immortal mortal, smiling at the sun which meant nothing to me; grinning at the warmth which meant no brief respite for me. Always human, smiling human.

"Let's go out today." I mused to my goblet, sounding a little thoughtless and distant. Your head jumped from the dark wood of the table to my light eyes, surprise as evident as pleasure there. Left Bird and Right Bird, playful as they are, bobbed delicately feathered heads in agreement from where they perched together on the wide windowsill. You nodded quickly, allowing the force to shake your arm as well as it pulled the empty fork from your mouth. I said nothing else, and breakfast finished itself in hurried silence. I could feel your impatience to be outside, under the sunshine. How strongly the night cries for light...

You cleared the plates away in record time, even for you, and I could see just how badly you wanted to out of the darkness of the castle. It was odd—it did not bother me that you would rather be outside than in—it was amusing, although I had the sense to know that I should have been unhappy with this. You ran to my side, the birds trailing silently behind you, beating to stay aloft in the still air of the room, and your smile -so innocent- made me glad I had not chosen to devote the day to research.

The outside air was warmer than I'd anticipated; for a moment I regretted wearing the over-cloak, then my youkai body acclimated itself to the temperature, and it was like any other day. You, however, crossed the castle threshold panting, and your tiny brown jacket was thrown aside quickly. Shadows crisscrossed the front walk as the birds swum lazy circles above us, providing fleeting relief from the glaring heat. And though your small form wilted under the intense light, I could catch a smile amid your panting that belittled the temperature.

Your mortal skin reveled in the white daylight, but you could not stifle the relief that must have washed over you as we stepped into the first patches of shifting leaf-shaped shade. But it wasn't until the trees grew close enough together to offer us some makeshift canopy that you slipped the thin brown material back across your shoulders and stopped breathing like an overheated dog. Weak little human, almost endearing.

Your eyes were delightfully bright, shining with a rare, strong smile. When was the last time you'd actually gone out because you wanted to, assured that the open doors and warm home would not vanish if you left them? Had you ever really had the chance to enjoy yourself without worry? It made no sense, I was glad suddenly that we'd murdered the man. Humans have such a short time... Why would they ever want to make others of their kind suffer? I shook my head once, a cascade of soft lilac strands ghosted across my cheek, and you peered up at me, confusion dulling your grin momentarily.

"Where will we spend the day?" I was asking myself more than you; you could not possibly know much about the Arinain landscape beyond your human village. Nonetheless, you turned your emerald eyes to the dead leaves crunching beneath our feet, deep in thought as to how the day would be wiled away. Neither of us had an answer, but I knew the path we were taking would run to the sea.

You seemed to notice soon enough—your steps faltered, you took a deep breath, sniffling at the sudden sharp smell of salt and sun-warmed water. Your pointed nose wrinkled childishly, not only from the strong smell but from sudden application of memory, as if some important sliver of past was expertly eluding you. The trees ended sharply, stealing away the shade but ushering in a hard, crisp breeze riddled with the husky calls of seabirds. It swept out before us, an endless expanse of water, blending with the shore in sand brown swells that licked back and forth perpetually. I heard your breath catch, just quickly, and then you were ahead of me, green eyes dancing greedily over the flat horizon, smile inviting the harsh taste of salt onto your tongue. The waves sounded a stark serenade in my ears, and I wondered briefly if your human body heard them as I could.

"Have you been to this place before Garfakcy?" Right bird flashed out over the cliffs, dancing upward in the thermals over the hot sand.

"Once," you muttered, "When I was very young. Mother..." Whatever you were going to say never crossed your lips, and I resisted the urge to say that you were still "very young". We settled ourselves gently on one of the cliffs edges and if you had any fear of falling, it didn't show. For a long while there were only the waves and gulls, and your quiet breath. Then I murmured unbidden,

"Master once told me that there is another land across this sea. A land of tall mountains, where it is often cold enough to freeze falling rain. There are Dragons there, and Faeries—a whole kingdom." You stared outward now with a different look, as if you were straining to see the foreign shores. "Let's go there one day." And I knew a smile had crept onto my face at the prospect of new and unknown things. The vibrant silence fell again, and I momentarily stared off across the sea exactly as you had, desperately wishing I would spot what not even youkai could see.

"I heard once that there're three big pillars right in the middle..." You sounded unsure, as if the information was flittering back and forth between rumor and reality.

"The Three Poles of the Beginning." I had not even known I knew of them, but the correct name fell from my lips as facts are oft to do. You nodded briefly, as if you'd heard the name and just now recalled it. More information came to mind unbidden, and I could not remember if I had read about the pillars or if Master had spoken of them.

"Is it true that there's one for every-" You began, but fell silent as I finished your thought for you.

"Great race. Faeries, Demons, Dragons... Maybe the poles are testament to a time when the species stood together." I knew the smile on my face was a little wicked, a little doubtful that a moment of peace between Demons and Faeries had ever existed.

"And humans?" The question was quiet, as if you were trying to fake disinterest. My answer was slow in coming and I stared out over the glittering sea before answering.

"The poles were not raised without foundation." You turned to blink at me, surprised that my reply was clear of cynical indifference. "Without a base to hold it clear of the tide, even the mightiest race might crumble into the sea." You blinked again, eyes almost unfocused as you processed the heavy implications of my statements. As a pair the birds swept downward in a spiral dance, black feathers whispering back and forth in the aquamarine expanse.

When had the sun slipped so far across the sky? We'd skipped lunch, and though I didn't need it, I was already missing the taste of those sweet teacakes you made... You seemed content watching the waves, and I said nothing of leaving until the wind picked up, throwing over us crisp salty gusts that made you shiver visibly. Even then, you seemed reluctant to leave the sun-warmed cliffs, and stared over your shoulder as we left the place, breathing deep the scent of salt and foreign shores.

It was later than I'd expected, and the forest shadows were long and dark, suspiciously devoid of vagrant patches of sun. It was beginning to cool, giving the wood an air of sunset, though that was at least an hour away. You scuffed through the dead ground cover, trying hard to act like a mature young human, quite capable of remaining reserved, even in the face of leaves begging to be kicked. The crunching was a snappy chorus in my ear, and I did not fail to see the smile creep onto your face as a particularly large leaf crumbled under foot. I couldn't comprehend it, it intrigued me to no end—the duplicity of your simple human mind. One moment your jade eyes burnt with a sharp, cold determination to prove yourself to me, to those who had always doubted you... And the next moment, the green was a warm blaze of child-like amusement and a stubborn streak to rival my own.

It struck me as odd; I could have written a novel just about the expressions on your face. I must have looked a little lost then, a little put out—it bothered me briefly that my eyes were not like yours. My eyes were that of a proper youkai's, showing of the barest flashes of anything, hardly serving as tools communication at all. A sudden urge -a stupid one- bled into me. I wanted to be Avis Rara. I wanted to be human. I wanted my smile to brighten eyes that could burn with amusement. You crushed a twig; the feeling passed as swiftly as it had come, leaving me appalled with myself. I did not want to be human, I never had. I did not want to have anything less than pure youkai blood maintaining my form. A patch of sun lit the back of my cloak momentarily, and I knew that was what had started me thinking crazy things. I did not want to be human—I wanted to be warm. I wanted my smile to be as real as your own.

There was a sudden flash of fur, a sudden glint of a feral gaze, and you leapt back, as taken with surprise as I was. A weasel, frozen in a mockery of defense, bore its sly dark eyes into mine, assessing the danger. You were almost forgotten as it peered at the creature it had deemed 'predator'. I stared back, momentarily trapped by its gaze, which seemed to convey to me an intelligence I could not understand or reach. It was analyzing me, searching for weak places, deciding in its tiny mind on what sort of threat I posed. It was surveying me as an animal that had invaded its territory. That piercing gaze began to feel distasteful, but I could not look away. Overhead, Left Bird changed branches. The rodent looked up, and the spell was broken. I took a small step forward; the deep brown animal disappeared into the brush again without as much as a rustle of leaves. You blinked once, confused because you had not been privy to look the creature and I had shared. I made to move on, intent on reaching the castle before dark, but you bent low, examining a splattering of grey among the fallen leaves.

"It dropped it." You realized the grey bits were feathers from a recently caught bird. It was tiny, and dead; its dark eyes were half shut and glassy. You stared at it, and the look on your face was something odd, a little cold, and a little too superior, as if you wanted to taunt the limp body for not flying fast enough. I bent and plucked the wet-feathered form from the leaves, liking how white my palms looked beside its muddy-colored wings. "Gah, Master Kharl, put that down! They have all sorts of bugs!" You balked at it now that it was close enough to touch you, and I knew that was just your cleanliness leaking through again.

It wasn't sympathy that made me do it. The stiff little form was of no interest to me, really. Perhaps it was because I had always liked birds. Perhaps it was curiosity, or boredom. Whatever the cause, I acted without thought, and I regretted it later. I called Right and Left Bird from the branches to rest near me, and without the slightest hesitation, dipped into the deep reserve of my youkai power. I felt the answer immediately, and the birds bated swiftly, offering their energy without the slightest command. I could feel the cold flesh between my fingers, but my eyes had slid closed, focused on setting the youki in right pattern, sewing up a soul with an ease that was far too practiced. Looking back, I realize how foolish that bit of power was. I had not even thought of what you would see, what you would think... Humans are not often witnesses to the most beautiful practices of youkai power, and I was not surprised to open my pale eyes and find you staring wide-eyed at me, as if I had suddenly worked a miracle.

I heard a soft, inquisitive 'chirp' and the bird perched on one my delicate fingers ruffled its feathers impatiently, awaiting orders. Your hand, which had frozen when I'd performed the simple magic, was shaking slightly.

"Alive." Oh, the grin on my face must have been so superior! "You brought it back from the dead." Your voice was monotone, as if you felt your eyes were lying to you.

"No," I denied, a bit regretfully, "I'm not a healer. I can't save something that's been lost."

"But-" And now you seemed willing enough to defend the life of the creature cheeping in my palm.

"I didn't bring it back. I replaced it, look." I held the animal out to you, and for the first time you noticed the tiniest differences that stood out boldly to me. The creature's small eyes had gone a garnet red; its claws had become sharper, more like tools of war. The wounds had not healed, but now the bird did not seem to mind at all the holes that had taken its life previously. "I've made it—"

"A demon." You stared it, and I surprised by your interest. You were not supposed to be in awe of this power. You were not supposed to still be looking as if you'd witnessed a miracle. You were a human, and humans were supposed to fear the gifts of monsters. You were supposed to hate me for manipulating the tiny corpse, like some grim puppeteer in a grand show. I worried suddenly, when you took the bird from me, gracing it with a smile that you had never given it in its death. You looked up at me quickly, and your green eyes seemed to be veiling something. The little bird snuggled against your thumb; you regarded me as you never had before. "You're powerful." And it came across your lips as if the idea was new. "You can make other demons. There aren't even stories about youkai that strong." And suddenly, I was uncomfortable, as if I had been hiding something, and my secret had just been revealed. I hadn't been keeping secrets really, I just had not expected youkai to be of any interest to you.

"Yes, I am strong." I took the bird from you and released it, with silent orders that it enjoy itself, and I knew my tone had been a bit colder than I wanted. Unsure of why, I simply marked it off as a bit of frustration at your odd reaction. Despite the fact that I felt as if I'd ended the conversation, I heard you mutter as I started to walk away,

"Can you make anything into a demon? Anyone?" I blinked, thoroughly startled by the question. Could I make anyone into a demon? Yes. But why ask that? Your question was rhetorical, or at least, you did not seem to mind too much when I did not answer. Finally, you tore your eyes off the place where the tiny flapping youkai had sat in your hand and locked gazes with me. It reminded me awfully of the clever weasel sizing up the larger animal. "What kind of demon are you?" You stared quietly for a few moments, and then as if you didn't care about my reply at all, looked away. I was shaken, though I was careful not to show it. What kind of demon are you?

I didn't know.

The air had grown chilly sometime in our interrupted trip back to the castle, and it was clearly a welcome relief for you to be back inside the warm castle. The birds disappeared upstairs with graceful flaps of their wide wings, no doubt going in search of the stores of food reserved solely for them. The room was eerily silent; I found myself in no mood to make pleasant conversation. I did not particularly like the fact that you had managed to shake me. I was the youkai. I was the smarter, stronger, more perfect one, yet you and a tiny mammal had felt the need to stare at me as if I was some sort of rare creature on display. I wasn't angry, only slightly perturbed. In any case, I was not ready for a tiny fist to grip iron-like to the back of my cloak.

"Master Kharl..." Your voice was remarkably quivering, quite unlike the coldly curious tone you'd struck only a few minutes ago. "Can you make anyone a demon?" There was a pause, one I unsure how to fill, and then you almost pleaded, "Make me like the bird. Make me a youkai, please!" I was frozen, listening to the demand ring in my head repeatedly.

"No." My answer was harsh, abrupt, and you stepped back in shock at the strength of it. I was not thinking clearly, I was not thinking at all. I could not let you become like me. I could not let you lose the warmth of humanity, when there was no mortality for you fear. I could not tear from you the vestiges of life that made your smile sincere and your eyes alive. I could not. Ever. "No." I repeated, softer this time, though only slightly. With a stiff tug, I pulled free of you, and went silently up the stairs, leaving you in the wide entrance hall, with only a dying fire for company.

I could never let you become like the little bird. Its wounds hadn't healed. How could you expect the scars of humanity to vanish? I fell into my bed, unable to even pull off my boots. I felt hollow, perfectly empty, as though something important had been damaged between us. What would the morning be like? How could I face you, knowing now... You wanted to give up the very things I had been envious of.

Pale visions of emerald eyes swam on my closed eyelids, blurring and bleeding into messes of slit-pupil scarlet. My half-dreams were plagued by the sight of your warm smile growing ice cold.

Make me a youkai!

Never.

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Author's Notes: So... It could have been a lot better. I'm just so out of it right now. I haven't read a Dragon Knights book since I tossed book 20 down in frustration. Am I the only one confused about Rath? If Kharl is his creator, how can he be part of Nadil? What the HELL is the difference between Demon King and Demon Lord! And WTF is with Rune's emo-attack? I mean, last volume he was using Varawoo, and now he's like "Kill me too Thatz!" And Thatz is druggin' people… Geesh. Riru riiru came and went so fast I lost myself. And the translations are just sooo wack. At least Zouma still makes sense. He's the one shining spot of relief in a very confusing Kainaldain world. ANYWAY, this chapter is the last that will go day-by-day. Next chapter, which will hopefully come much more quickly, will HAVE to skip ahead. At my current update rate, if I tried to write it day-by-day, I wouldn't finish until my 600th birthday… T.T

Review Responses:
Stalish Poptart: Your name makes me smile. ? Anyway, thank you for the compliments, and reviewing. I hope you still remember this story… It has been sooo long since I updated.
Aquajogger: HOMG, I'm really sorry I haven't updated, or reviewed your fanfiction! My dragon knights obsession sorta… faded at book 19. It's coming back, I know, because I have already read book 21 in Japanese, and it is the shiz (at least it will be until those awful Tokyopop folks get their hands on it)… I'm so glad you liked the last chapter, which you probably can't even remember now. T.T
Serenity Komoshiro: Why do I even bother replying here to you? You never read my author's notes, wench. Just kidding, hee hee.
Brianna: You really liked it? Hee hee, thank you very much. I'm very glad you did, and I hope the long wait hasn't made you TOTALLY forget this story. (I almost forgot it.)
Yami-chan and the Unrealistic: You told me to update soon… I have decided that six months is decidedly not soon. (Little cries) I'm very sorry, and I know this chapter just pales in comparison to the last one. But oh well, it is what it says it is, only an interlude. Thank you for reviewing!

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