FALLING WITH GRACE
by shiiki

CHAPTER SEVEN

Birthday Surprises

July – August, 1979

Marcia Davenport wasn't the last instance of Death Eater cruelty that Lily witnessed. There were more attacks, more terrible scenes displaying the very lowest level that humanity could sink to.

The latest was a mass Muggle killing at Fort William: Death Eaters had blown up a bridge full of tourists, and by the time Lily arrived with Nicholas Lovegood and Marlene McKinnon, the entire site was in complete chaos.

There was only one Death Eater left at the scene, surveying his work with his arms crossed in what Lily felt was a horribly smug manner. Marlene immediately went after him, but he Disapparated the moment she advanced, wand raised, and there was nothing they could do except try to clean up the damage that had been done.

The bridge was beyond repair – half of it had fallen away into the loch below – and there was no help for the Muggle tourists who had gone down with it. But there were still survivors: lost, wide-eyed people wandering about; others staring numbly at the debris that had been a spectacular attraction just moments ago, as though they couldn't fathom what had just occurred; children standing at the edge of the destruction, crying for their parents.

If only, thought Lily bitterly, if only we'd been here earlier.

The Ministry's Department of Magical Catastrophes personnel arrived to take care of the disaster. Lily wondered what reason the Muggle-Worthy Excuse Committee would provide for the explosion that had disintegrated the bridge. Terrorists, she would have explained. It wasn't far from the truth, after all: what were Voldemort and his Death Eaters, if not a group of magical terrorists subverting their world because of their insanely warped ideology?

A small hand tugged at the bottom of her robes. Lily looked down to see a tiny girl of four or five, with a scratched, bruised face and pleading eyes.

'Help Mama,' said the girl urgently.

'Where's your mama?'

The girl led her dangerously close to the epicentre of the destruction, a steep drop that must have formed when the bridge's support structure had given way. Lily looked downwards and saw, with horror, that there was a woman there, wedged like a plank between a rock protruding from the earth and a surviving steel pillar. She could possibly have dislodged herself and climbed her way to safety, but her hands were tightly wrapped around a baby bundled at her chest. Her eyes lightened when she saw Lily peering down at her, and with tremendous effort, she held the baby up.

There was a loud groan from the steel as the mother's position shifted. Lily, reaching for the baby, heard it and froze, realising that the pillar supporting the woman's back might be about to give way. The woman seemed to realise this, too; in a quick, decisive action, she curled herself into a sitting position and launched her baby upwards, into Lily's waiting arms.

The sudden movement was a catalyst – the steel pillar broke away with a resounding crack, and the woman was flung off balance, her arms flailing as she fell away, gravity pulling her down towards the loch below to meet her death. Lily grappled for her wand, but the baby in her arms slowed her movement, and by the time she cast the Levitating Charm, it was too late.

'Mama!' screamed the little girl who had approached Lily for help. She tried to leap off the side of the precipice after her mother, but Lily caught hold of her collar and held her back. 'Mama!' she continued to wail, as Lily dragged her, kicking and screaming, away from the edge.

The girl beat at her with tiny fists, but Lily held both the children close until the girl's pitiful cries softened into sobs punctuated with the occasional hiccup. Then she brought both of them to where Marlene and Nicholas were helping the Ministry to round up the other survivors. They were discharged into the care of a distraught father, who was at first relieved to find his children, then grief-stricken once he discovered the fate of his wife.

That night, as she tried to bully her exhausted mind into shutting down so that she could sleep, Lily couldn't shake off the image of the poor woman falling, falling, falling … It replayed itself in her head like a broken recorder: the baby flying into her arms, the mother letting go and plummeting away. Even as she drifted in and out of dreamland, the scene continued to rewind and play, until she wasn't sure if she were dreaming or consciously reliving it. The actions changed occasionally – sometimes she was the one falling, but upwards, into the sky; or it was the baby, crying for her mother as she tumbled. In one recollection, the mother's face stood out clearly, frozen in one particular instant. She had just realised that she was about to fall, and her fear was evident in her panicked expression.

Then the terror was quickly replaced with a look of determination. As if someone had released the pause button, the woman flung her baby towards Lily's arms. This time, Lily saw her face again, relaxed as she fell away, calm acceptance of her fate written across her features. At this juncture, Lily found herself awake and thinking lucidly.

She had known. The young mother had known that the steel structure wouldn't support her any more. And she'd taken the chance to throw her baby to safety, even though it had resulted in her own death. Lily was certain of it, as her mind's eye recreated the woman's face, satisfied that she'd saved her child, thinking no more of her own life.

The mother's sacrifice tugged at Lily's brain, prodding insistently at her. There was something … a connection she needed to make …

She dropped off again before the conclusion could settle, but when the morning sunshine spilling through her tatty curtains, it arrived, fully-formed, at the front of her mind.

Sacrifice – the sacrifice of love – was the single element she required to amalgamate the Death Shield.

---

It seemed odd that an Order rescue mission might be a chance for James to carry out house shopping. He and Sirius had evacuated the Muggles from the three bombed houses in the village – it seemed that the Death Eaters had performed the Reductor and Merlin knew what other destructive curses at whim.

He picked his way through the complaining Muggles, who were bitter over their misfortune. At the last house, he stopped.

An old, balding Muggle stood at the gate, a mournful look on his wrinkled face. He wasn't screaming or hysterical like the other Muggle families, just staring at the wreckage of his house – the roof had collapsed at one point, and one side of the wall had been blown inwards – and holding a signpost outside the gate upright.

The Muggle turned and saw James watching him. He met James's eyes and shook his head sadly, spreading his hands in a defeated gesture.

'Will you be all right?' James found himself asking.

'There's still the children, innit?' shrugged the Muggle. 'I would've gone anyway, once I'd sold the place. But no one's daft enough to buy it now, are they?'

'Well,' said James, eyeing the damage critically. 'It could be fixed up …'

'I've no insurance, 'ave I?'

James hadn't the foggiest what insurance was, but as he turned the idea of repairing the house over in his mind, he found that it sounded like a good plan. What if he were to buy the house, and patch it up? Already in his imagination he was rebuilding the place, picturing Lily sitting in a rocking chair beside a warm hearth, welcoming him home …

'How much would you be wanting?' he asked.

The Muggle looked at him dubiously. 'You'd want to buy the place? Lookin' like this? Broken an' …'

'Sure. Can I have a look inside?'

The Muggle gave his assent, still looking as though he thought James was out of his mind. James let himself in through the gate and gingerly opened the front door.

Inside, it smelled of old shingles and wood – unsurprisingly, as the stairs had caved in along with the wall they were lined against and the wooden stair rails were splintered. He couldn't get through the hallway, as the roof had collapsed right in the middle, blocking the way with a pile of broken plaster and tiles. The stairs were obviously impossible to negotiate as well, so James (taking a careful glance around first to make sure no one could see) Apparated to the top. Again, there wasn't much to see – only one room had been left intact; it appeared to be the old Muggle's bedroom. There was a photograph frame that had fallen to the ground. James picked it up and noticed that the glass was smashed, but the picture inside (the Muggle man, surrounded by five small children and an old, wrinkled woman, all unmoving) was still fine.

James carried the frame with him as he Disapparated back downstairs and returned outside. He held it out to the Muggle by the gate, who took it from him in amazement.

'How …?' The Muggle traced the faces of the people in the photograph with his finger. 'That's me and the grandkids, see,' he said, pointing at the photograph. Then a sad, longing look crossed his face. 'And their Gran.' He pressed the picture to his heart and smiled at James. 'Ah, you're a good boy, you are,' he said approvingly. 'You still fancy it then, the house?'

'Yes, please.' Although he hadn't seen much of the house, it was already establishing itself in his mind as the dream home he'd been searching for. And with work … it could probably become that.

It didn't take long for them to reach an agreement on the price. It was a ridiculously low amount in Galleons, but James supposed that in terms of Muggle money, the old man was pleased with the offer.

James found out later, when he told Sirius about the deal, the crowning touch to the house.

'Couldn't have chosen a better village, James,' Sirius said approvingly.

'Really? How so?'

Sirius pointed to the address scrawled on the mailbox a few houses down.

3 Godric's Hollow.

'Godric's …'

'Can't have a better Gryffindor connection than that, can you?'

---

There was a lull in Death Eater activity mid-July. While this wasn't exactly a comforting scenario – what were the Death Eaters and Voldemort up to, if not wreaking havoc across the nation? – it did allow James more time to work on the house in Godric's Hollow. By Lily's birthday, at the beginning of August, he had finished repairing the basic structure, and he felt that the time might be right to invite Lily to have a look.

'You ought to propose to her when you do,' advised Sirius, who had invested many of his own free hours into helping James with his construction work. 'She'll eat it up.'

James decided to trust him on that. Sirius was considered the wisest among them when it came to women; he'd always known what to say or do to attract and retain female attention, and girls had flocked to him in hoards, only to be disappointed when they found out that he wasn't interested in committing to a relationship that went beyond flirting.

He brought Lily out for a birthday sundae at Florean Fortescue's (no one made ice-cream like Florean, and James definitely wanted Lily in a good mood before he dared to propose). Halfway through their ice-cream, however, James developed an uneasy sensation that they were being watched.

Under the pretence of scratching his neck, James tilted his head towards the windows behind him, and noticed her – a willowy blonde who was gazing in his and Lily's direction. James tensed up immediately, as his mind jumped to the platinum-haired Malfoy family: Drucilla Malfoy, Lily's old nemesis at school; Sirius's cousin Narcissa. Neither of these women spying would bode well for them.

Next to him, Lily must have felt the hand she was holding tighten, because she whispered, 'What's wrong?'

James threw another surreptitious glance over his shoulder, but the icy-fair woman had moved out of sight.

'I thought I saw …'

'Petunia?' gasped Lily suddenly, as she, too, craned her neck around. Without warning, she scraped back the chair and shot to her feet, letting go of James's hand.

'What?' And then he saw her again – the blond woman flitted into view again, pressing her face to the window, peeking inside. Now that James could see her face, he realised with a mixture of relief and confusion that she was indeed Lily's older sister.

What was Petunia doing in a wizarding region such as Diagon Alley, though?

The implausibility of the scenario didn't seem to strike Lily, however. She was quickly weaving her way through the pub tables, towards the door. With a swish of her red ponytail, she disappeared through the exit. James hesitated for a moment before following her.

Petunia had ducked into the alley between Madam Malkin's and Flourish and Blotts. Lily quickly dashed after her, and by the time James caught up, he saw her throwing her arms around Petunia and hugging her sister tight. To her credit, this time, Petunia didn't push Lily away; however, neither did she return the warm gesture. When Lily released her, James could see that her thin face was anxious and withdrawn.

'Pet, I've worried since I last saw you. I can't believe you've come all the way to Diagon Alley! How did you …?'

'I found my way, Lily. I just had to find you – I can't … I can't keep this up any more, Lily. I need your help. You've got to …' Petunia wrung her hands desperately. Lily caught them and held them fast.

'Of course, I'll help you, Pet. What's happened? Has … have there been people – magical folk – bothering you?'

She was talking about Death Eaters. James recalled the last visit to Petunia's home that he and Lily had made together; Petunia's husband had all but slammed the door in their faces, telling them never to darken their doorstep ever again. What horrible event could have taken place between then and now to bring Petunia in search of Lily?

Or was it a trap?

'Will you – come with me?' Petunia looked around edgily, as if afraid of being overheard.

'Pet, you've got to tell me what's going on, first! This could be dangerous business – you don't know how serious it is. Tell me, Pet, and I'll get the Or – my friends to help.'

'No!' Petunia sounded near to hysterics. 'They'll – they'll – kill me if anyone knows I … they said they'd kill me if I told anyone, nobody can know …' Her eyes were roving again, and they landed on James. She gave a frightened squeal, and backed away from Lily. 'He …'

Lily threw a glance over her head and spotted him. 'Pet, it's just James, he won't …'

'No, Lily – I …' She leaned forward to whisper something in Lily's ear, then she bolted, pushing past James and dashing out of the alley, down the cobbled path of Diagon Alley.

'Petunia!'

James wasn't sure what compelled him to do it, but he caught Lily's arm firmly before she could dash after her sister again. There was something about the entire exchange that didn't feel right to him. And he'd be damned if he let Lily run off blindly into a dangerous situation.

'James – what are you doing?' Lily whirled around to face him, her eyes blazing.

'Lily, stop and think a while, will you? You can't just go charging after her without knowing what's going on – what if she leads you right to Death Eaters, or –'

'And it's all right to let her run into danger by herself?'

'It's just – there's something … odd about this. What's she doing here, in Diagon Alley, of all places? How did she get in? How did she know you'd be here?'

'She's been here before, a long time ago, all right? Maybe she didn't know, maybe she was just desperate, maybe she really needs help and you've just stopped me!'

'But … Lily, hasn't she always hated magic before? Think of how she's treated you!'

Lily glared at him. 'She's still my sister, James. I saw her, just a month ago – by chance, in case you're going to be suspicious about that, too. Sirius was with me, he'll tell you. And she was so … something's going on with her, James, and I'm scared that it might be my fault. Because of … you know.' Her angry expression softened and faded to sadness. 'I can't let her be targeted because of me. And if she needs my help now … James, what would you do if your sister came to you all frantic like Pet, and asked you to help her?'

A vision of Harriet, on the doorstep, bloody and battered, half-dead, floated to the forefront of his mind. James pushed it away forcefully. This wasn't the same case. Harriet and Petunia were miles apart from each other.

'It's not the same …'

'Of course it is!' Lily tossed her head stubbornly. 'She's the only family I've got left. And I'm going to make sure I still have her.'

'What if … what if she's – what if it's a ruse?'

Lily looked at him incredulously. 'She's a Muggle, James.'

'Lily, I'm not saying that we shouldn't help her. Look, we'll find a way to protect her, all right? But you need to be careful. If someone's threatening her, they'll know about you, and I don't want them to get you. Promise me you'll take care, Lily.'

She fixed her bright green eyes on him for a long, silent minute. Then finally, she nodded.

'I'll be careful,' she agreed.

James still felt his worry about the whole encounter niggling at him, but he tried to push it away. Forcing a smile, he said, 'I reckon our sundaes have all melted.'

'Reckon so,' said Lily. 'You'll just have to buy me another one, then!'

He complied, but after the entire incident, he had lost his nerve to bring her by Godric's Hollow. He would have to find another opportunity.

A/N: Thank you MagnoliaMama, belovedranger, exartemarte, and SnorkackCatcher for their advice on LJ and the CM forums. And an extra big, special thanks to Gilly, who very kindly agreed to help and did a fantastic job with the Welsh Muggle's accent!