Disclaimer: This part of the story does not exist. Right, don't own Finding Nemo catch phrases.
Link felt something wet and slimy plastered against his ankles.
"Oh, gross..." Navi moaned as she looked around.
They were inside Lord Jabu-Jabu's stomach. Saliva washed over Link's feet, and Navi felt certain something was dripping on her head.
Link coughed and wasn't even one step away from where he started when he was hit, once more, on the head.
Navi noticed a weird creature with green eyes glaring at Link. There was a small tube attached to it, and Navi guessed it was it's mouth.
"Ow!" Link yelped. "That hurt more than the Deku Scrub guy's stuff!"
Navi realized it was an Octorok...after several hits to the head.
Link's head had quite a few red bumps now, in comparison to Navi's.
"Use your shield!" Navi yelled.
Link accidentally took out his sword and watched as the ammo snapped into two pieces the minute it made contact.
"Well, that wor-" Link rubbed his stomach, which had just aquired another bump. "Hey, no fair!"
Navi stared helplessly as Link ran up to the Octorok and stabbed it.
The Octorok made a beeping noise, and blew up in bubbles.
"Oooh!!!" Link squealed. "Bubbiesss!!!"
He started to follow a bubble drifting into a tunnel.
"Slow down, Bubie!" Link called as made desperate swipes, trying to catch it.
Navi's eyes widened as Link burst straight through the wall and kept going. The fairy floated through Link's imprint and watched, amused, as Link tried to catch it.
Link broke through another wall as if it was paper and followed the bubble.
Finally, the bubble stopped, and Link made a leap.
"Yay!" Link cheered, blocking the bubble's way from escaping in his cupped hands.
Navi rolled her eyes.
"I shall call him my Squishy," Link declared, accidentally squeezing the bubble to make his point.
The bubble popped.
Link whined.
The creature in front of Link scoffed.
Link backed off and tripped.
"Who are you?" the creature demanded. It looked like a Zora, except the fins looked...smaller, and the head was huge.
"What monster is that?" Link whispered in Navi's ear, unsheathing his sword and shield.
Navi wandered over to the creature. "I think it's Ruto, Link!"
Link's eyes shifted suspiciously. "No, Ruto can't be that ugly...it must be a monster with brainwashing powers! That's right! You, you're brainwashed, Navi! That's why! You're trying to convince me, to get me nearer so I'll get brainwashed too!"
Navi and the "monster" exchanged confused looks.
"I think there's something wrong with his brain," Navi explained.
"I am Princess Ruto, and how dare you treat me like that, you inferior!" the young Zora growled as she stomped her foot impatiently. "Well, what are you waiting for? Bow!"
"Die!!!" Link yelled, as he tried to ram his sword into Ruto.
Ruto screamed and ran into a swirling vortex on the ground and disappeared from view.
"Look, Link, you were trying to kill Ruto! She's the Zora we're trying to rescue, not injure or stab." Navi scolded, sounding exasperated.
"I thought chasing her away would un-brainwash you!" Link sighed, disappointed.
"I'm not brainwashed!" Navi exploded. "Just follow her and-"
Before the angry fairy could finish her sentence, Link jumped down the vortex with a quick, "Ok!"
Navi plunged into the vortex as well, muttering.
Ruto backed into a corner as Link slammed a couple of Deku Nuts to the ground, watching the brilliant flash.
Navi fluttered besides Link, feeling sorry for the young Zora.
"Hey, Navi, how come she won't get stunned?" Link complained.
"She isn't a monster, so she obviously isn't affected!" Navi yelled.
"Oh." Link relaxed and approached Ruto. "Hi."
Ruto looked angry and mad.
The first thing she did was doubleslap Link on the face, and then punch him on the nose.
Link was completely oblivious of the fact she had just slapped him or punched him, and was otherwise stunned and surprised.
"Ouch." Navi uttered.
Link rubbed his nose and his cheek. That raised the count of getting beaten up by a girl to 3.
"So-ree," Link muttered.
Princess Ruto "humphed".
"What are you doing here?" she demanded.
"I'm here to save you," Link replied, knowing that that sentence was out of place, judging the fact she could definitely defend herself.
"Bah!" Ruto laughed. "Save me? A wimp? I don't need you to save me. Especially not a boy."
Link looked affronted. "But I need your stone."
Ruto fumed silently. "How did you know about my beloved sapphire???"
Link grinned. "I do now."
"Well, I can protect myself perfectly. When I find my stone, I'll leave."
She started walking, but almost immediately a Biri assaulted her.
"Ahhhhhhhh!"
Link struck the jellyfish with a Deku Nut and then finished it off with his sword, his eyesbrows raised in amusement.
"Well," Ruto admitted, "I guess I'll need a bodyguard...fine! You can carry me until I find my stone. But I won't give it to you!"
"Don't worry, we can ease it out of her grasp," Navi whispered, just as Link opened his mouth to say, "no."
"Fine." Link spat out, grabbing Ruto's ankles and taking out his sword.
"What are you doing!?!?!?!" Ruto exclaimed as Link started to cut the locked door. There were yellowish bonds holding it together, so they couldn't go through.
"Cutting," Link grunted, but Ruto shook wildly, causing Link to drop the sword.
"Don't do that, you'll hurt Lord Jabu-Jabu!"
Link ignored her, picked up the Kokiri sword, finished sawing off the rest of the cords, and the door automatically opened.
"Hurt Jabu-Jabu?" Link repeated sarcasticaly.
Ruto scowled. "Well, I bet you did, anyways..."
They entered, Link looking irritated as Ruto questioned him.
"Who ordered you to come in here, boy?" Ruto asked with an air of being a superior.
Link dodged a bubble, stabbed it, vibrated because of the electrical charge that went up his arm, and ignored Ruto.
"Answer me!" Ruto screeched, flailing her arms.
Navi grimaced. It wasn't going to be a very happy journey.
"Your father!" Link roared, threatening to throw her.
Ruto fell silent for the next few moments, but she wasn't exactly the type to keep quiet forever.
"I don't understand..." she muttered under her breath as Link threw her over a platform and jumping over shortly and picking her up again.
"Don't understand what?" Link said icily.
"I should be saved by a Zora, not a ignorant boy," Ruto murmured, as if Link didn't ask her anything.
Link decided not to reply to this.
"Look out!" Navi cried out.
Three Biri were quickly approaching Link and Ruto.
Ruto was busy brushing invisible dust off her fins, and was completely oblivious of the situation at hand.
Link dropped the vain Zora on the ground and held up his shield.
The nearest Biri oozed a disgusting purple liquid onto Link.
Navi flew up to them and beat her wings rapidly, knowing it to annoy them.
Link, however, was somewhat blinded and couldn't see, dropped his shield and walking in the opposite direction.
"No, Link! Not that-"
Crash.
Link fell into a small pool of water, but the good thing was that the liquid washed away, and his eyes could see, but his view was blurry.
Navi watched in horror as the jellyfish slowly approached Ruto, still oblivious.
"Ruto!" Navi yelled. "Get away from there!"
Ruto was so absorbed she didn't even hear Navi.
"Boy!" she screamed. "I need you to pick me up!"
When she didn't hear Link respond, she started to whine.
"Hey, get up here!"
She started pounding her fists on the ground, and unfortunately for the Biri, it was near enough to Ruto to stun her, but she was near enough to pound the Biri to the ground.
The Biri flattened until it was completely 2-D.
Navi gazed at it in shock.
The other two Biri floated towards Ruto's head.
Ruto got up angrily and looked around. "Hey, boy, I'm talking to you!"
"Can't you listen!?!?!?!" she complained.
Ruto noticed a small tentacle floating in front of her, but mistook it for a...
"Ewww, a fly!"
Slap.
The Biri shook violently and fell to the ground.
Ruto ignored the corpses and walked to Navi.
Navi was still gaping at Ruto.
"What????" Ruto asked irritably. "Answer!"
Bzzzzzzzzzzttt.
The remaining Biri buzzed in pain and fell to the ground.
Ruto smiled.
Navi looked at her, confused. "How did it die?"
Ruto held up a bottle with the label, "Eau de Ruto".
"It's a spicy, fresh perfume that's a dead ringer!"
She pressed a weird looked switch on it, causing some nasty-looking fumes to escape.
Navi choked and nearly fell down to the ground.
"It's nice, isn't it?" Ruto said, squirting some onto her fins. "I made it. Best ingredients in Zora's Domain. Dead fish held in a bottle for thirty days mixed with some Eyeball Frog skin, and then you add some-"
"Stop!" Navi choked, not wanting to hear more.
Link came up to Navi and Ruto, wet and sticky.
"What was that stuff I just fell in???" Link demanded.
"I'm not sure you want to know..." Navi replied grimly.
The trio walked across the bridge.