You like...mayonaise..that's...um...nice....but does that have to do with anything related to the story?

Mr. Kyle...you're the Crazy Guy right? Well, if Navi gets killed too early...well...who would take the place of extremely annoying yet smart charcacter?

(whacks disclaimer with mallet)

Navi looked so white she could've blended in with a bank of snow.

Link, on the other hand was sweating buckets.

Because in the room were two extremely dangerous-looking and armed to the bone Stalfos.

"Link, let's get out of here." Navi squeaked, motioning to the door and then stopping dead.

There were tight metal bars locked into placed on the door, preventing their escape.

Navi closed her eyes, hoping it was only a dream, opened them, and groaned when she saw the metal bars still there.

Link was frantically flipping through the pages of the strategy guide.

Navi watched Link anxiously, glancing back at the advancing Stalfos worriedly.

"Okay, I got it!" Link announced.

"What??" Navi cried out.

"Stalfos are extremely powerful creatures. The easiest way get rid of them is to touch them on the head with your index finger...?"

"Oh my Farore...so touch them on the head Link!" Navi shouted.

"Easy for you to say...look!"

Navi stared at the Stalfos heads.

Locked into place was a heavy metal cap that seemed to say, "You can't even lift me off!"

"You'll have to engage them in combat then!" Navi yelled.

"Yeah, and that'll be as easy as pie too, right???"

Link gulped and pulled out his newly found Hylian Shield and Master Sword.

"Even with all the shield and stuff he still looks like a regular little kid, just armed with a sword and all," Navi accidentally mumbled aloud.

"Thanks for the support, Navi." Link said before charging at the Stalfos.

Navi blushed and watched with growing dread.

Clang.

The Stalfos blocked Link attack easily with his heavy shield, retaliating by surging his crimson blade forwards, narrowly missing the Kokiri as Link jumped back in nick of time.

The other Stalfos had snuck up on Link.

"OWWWWWWWW!" Link kneeled down, rocking back and forth, yelling. Navi peeked at Link's back with fear.

There was a huge red gash, bleeding profusely.

Navi wasn't exactly the greatest fan of blood and gore, and started to throw up.

Link, on the other hand, was groaning in pain as he struggled to get up.

"ARAOUHHHHHH! YOU MAKE ME ANGRY! AND ME NO LIKE IT WHEN YOU MAKE ME ANGRY!"

Link started to grow in size, and strangest of all...he was turning green?

"I AM HULK! AND HULK IS ANGRY!"

Link swung his huge hands, knocking the Stalfos into the wall, and they kept on going and going.

Navi was still throwing up, unaware of what was happening.

Link started shrink. Finally, he brushed his hands and craned his neck to get a good view of the wound, and failed.

"Navi," Link whined. "Can you tell me if the scratch is okay?"

Navi coughed, stopped, took a look, and gazed at Link with amazement.

"It's perfectly fine," Navi assured him. "I don't know what your talking about."

In truth, it was still bleeding, but if Link wasn't feeling any pain...and Navi knew he would purposefully start to complain if he knew.

"Okay, and-wow! Look at that!"

Link raced to the gold treasure chest and kicked it open, greed gleaming in his eyes.

A few more moments later, Link was crying.

"Link??" Navi asked, alarmed. "Are you all right???"

"Yeah," Link sobbed. "There are onions in there!"

"Oh."

Navi started flying to chest, wanting to see for herself.

"By the goddesses," Navi cried. "It burns!"

Minutes after, both Navi and Link had sufficiently healed their eyes enough to snatch the shiny Fairy Bow.

"Nice.." Navi congratulated. "Give it a few test shots, practice a little."

Link nocked an arrow and aimed.

"Hey! Are you trying to kill me again??" Navi screeched, flying out of the way as the arrow whizzed by her ear.

"Sorry Navi, I was aiming for that weird picture over there."

Navi looked around and spotted the picture on the other side of Link.

"Yeah," Navi sighed, exasperated. "Yeah."