Please note: this chapter has adult content so if you are easily offended, you may want to look away now...

Disclaimer: I keep asking but apparently it all belongs to Kudos and the BBC...

Thanks Em ;)

Requiem for a love affair

Chapter 8

Ruth stood and stared at the man in her kitchen. It couldn't possibly be him; he was dead. She watched, rooted to the spot, as he moved towards her.

He was close enough now to smell her perfume and hear her erratic breathing. Without warning, she slapped his face hard and he could taste blood in his mouth. It was the reaction he had half-expected but it was still a shock.

"You bastard. You fucking bastard." The clipped tone made the obscenity seem worse. "Three months Harry." A pause. "I have spent the last three months thinking you were dead. Do you have any idea what that was like? Any concept?"

"There was no other way."

"No other way?" She spat the words back at him and moved closer. He could see the tension in her face, her fists clenched.

"Things moved quickly. There was nothing else I could do… I wanted to…"

Her fists pummelled his shoulders. She had a surprising strength and he staggered back slightly under the onslaught. Her voice began to rise as the suppressed hysteria finally surfaced.

"I thought you were dead! I thought you were dead! You bastard, I thought you were dead!"

He let her hit him for a few more moments, the pain from her blows affirmation that she still felt something for him, even if was more akin to hate than love. He hadn't been convinced he would ever see her again after she had climbed onto that Thames barge and left him, bereft and grieving on a cold, miserable dockside. He grasped her hands, pulling them away from his shoulders and held them tightly as she tried to continue her assault. She could barely speak now, tears streaming down her face.

"I'm sorry, so sorry." The only words he could find for her; a well-worn platitude delivered with heart and soul.

She stopped trying to fight him and her whole body sagged as her exertions took their toll. Harry was forced to grip her arms tightly to stop her from collapsing onto the floor.

"I'm here and I'm alive; and so are you. Do you understand me?"

Blue-grey eyes clouded with tears looked up at him uncomprehendingly.

"Do you understand Ruth? I'm alive." He shook her slightly to emphasis his words, a sudden anger burning through his veins. He hated himself for what he had put her through. And part of him hated her for what she had done; sacrificing herself, sacrificing them, so he could stay in the service. So he could stay and endure twenty-five months of abject misery and unrelenting battles. Twenty-five months that had ended in a pile of hot, twisted metal on a remote B road. That had ended in scandal, recriminations and revenge, served cold, as recommended.

He pulled her into his embrace, her tears subsiding as he held her. He felt her arms wind round his neck and her mouth found his. Some of her strength had returned, as had some of her anger. She pressed her lips forcefully against his and he willingly acquiesced to her as she pushed her tongue into his mouth with strong, rhythmic strokes. She pulled away from him suddenly and her hands grasped the bottom of his shirt. She tugged at it, moving the soft cotton up his body. He lifted his arms up to assist her and she yanked the garment roughly over his head and discarded it on the floor. Her hands moved to his belt, which she quickly undid. She released the button of his trousers and her fingers momentarily hovered over his zip. He gave an involuntary gasp as she slowly slid the metal teeth apart, scraping a fingernail down his hardened length.

His trousers and underwear had joined his shirt on the floor and he stood in front of her, naked and aroused. She hadn't said a word to him as she stripped him but now she spoke.

"Get on the floor."

He didn't move.

"Get on the floor Harry. Now."

This time he obeyed, never taking his eyes from her as he sat down. She started to remove her own clothes, adding them to the haphazard pile of garments on the floor. Once she was naked, she knelt in front of him, placed her hands on his shoulders and pushed him back so he was lying on the floor. She straddled him, just below his ribcage, but didn't lower her full weight onto his body. She teased him by gently brushing her wetness against his stomach but avoided his groin. His hands grasped her hips. He desperately wanted her to move down his body so he could enter her and give them both the release they craved.

She resisted his attempts to shift her position, whispering 'not yet', then moved his hands to her chest, encouraging him to massage her breasts. She moaned softly as his hands caressed the soft mounds, his thumbs brushing over her hardened nipples in slow circles. Harry groaned as she began sliding her hand up and down his shaft, her touch firm and measured. He ran his hand gently down her stomach and Ruth lifted her hips slightly, encouraging him to explore further. She ground against his hand as she felt a finger curl inside her.

As she sensed him getting closer to his climax she let go of him and pulled away from his massaging hands. She shifted her position and gently guided him inside her. She gasped at the sensation, closing her eyes only when he was completely within her. Harry fought the urge to thrust into her until her hands grasped his and she started to rock against him, bracing herself against his arms. She no longer needed control of their lovemaking and he willingly pushed himself against her, increasing the speed of his movements as he felt her tighten round him. Her body trembled and he felt the involuntary spasms of her muscles as her orgasm hit her. He followed soon after, letting go inside her while she still shook.

Ruth slowly pulled away from him and sat back on her heels. She ran a shaky hand through her hair before dipping her head briefly. When she looked up again, Harry could see the tears cascading silently down her face. He sat up and held out a hand to her, which she took, lacing her fingers through his.

"I missed… you… so much." The words were interspersed with gulps and sobs.

Harry swallowed, feeling a lump form in his throat as he fought to hold back his own tears. "I missed you too. More than I thought was possible."

She nodded slightly at him and then pulled him closer so she could embrace him. The warmth of her skin and the feel of her tears were enough to make him give in to the urge to cry as well and they sat, bodies entwined, and wept.

Well, hope that wasn't too much of a shock... Thanks for all the wonderful reviews and the encouragement. Send me another and I'll post the next chapter. :)