Hahaha, this topic is probably one of those overused ones, but I just couldn't resist including it!! I hope you guys enjoy this chapter!

Thanks to thesongremainsthesame and um for their reviews!! And, yes, I fixed the little boo-boo in chapter one...and i apologize for it!!!!

Disclaimer: If wrote the HP books, I would definitely put off the publication of the book until next summer…so I'm definitely not JKR!!

Picture Perfect

Chapter II:
Arachnophobia

"Ron, Ron, honey, let go of Teddy."

Three year old Ron with a bouncy tuft of bright red hair, tightly clutched his raggedy teddy bear with one arm as he shook his head furiously, his left thumb jammed in his mouth, a line of saliva dribbling down his chin.

"Bill, Charlie," Mr. Weasley called up the rickety staircase as he hauled the ancient Weasley camera across the foyer and onto the steps of the freshly painted porch, "picture time!"

"Aw, Dad, do we have to?" moaned Charlie as he attempted to straighten his polka dot bowtie from behind the screen door.

"Yes, it's the annual Weasley portrait," Mr. Weasley answered through gritted teeth as he attempted to simultaneously erect the dusty tripod and place the roll of film in the camera. "Get the twins, would you?"

"Gred, Forge!" dyslexic Bill called down the hall in the direction of the kitchen as he also struggled with his burgundy bowtie (the darn thing just would stay straight!). "Picture time!"

"Molly, where are the little ones?" Mr. Weasley reentered the Burrow after brilliance struck him, causing him to casually flick his wand, ultimately resulting in the automatic set up of the camera.

Mrs. Weasley exited through the door, toddler Ginny, dressed in a fluffy pink dress with accents of miniature daisies, on her hip and young Ron, still clutching his stuffed bear to his chest, trailed behind.

"Arthur," the mother of the young Weasleys studied her husband intently. "Are you going to wear that for the picture?"

"Uh…" Mr. Weasley looked down at his dusty robes and the new hole that the tripod made when he was wrestling the thing down the staircase. "Well…"

She glared at him.

"Right…I'm going to go…change now," he answered slowly, carefully picking words in hopes of not irritating the already high strung Mrs. Weasley.

"Thank you," she said, smiling sweetly before turning back her original problem. "Ron, please, just put Teddy down for a minute, just one quick minute so we can take this picture, please?" sighed Mrs. Weasley as she set Ginny down on the porch steps (who quickly tottered a short distance to discover the wonders of grass).

Ron pouted and tightened his clutch around Teddy's stomach. Mrs. Weasley made a move to diplomatically negotiate the stuffed animal out of the sticky arms of Ron when—

"Mummy!"

The twins, in untucked dress shirts and soiled dress pants, rounded the corner of the house (followed by a small army of angry chickens), one with an armload of wooden splinters. The other, George, ran alongside his brother, torn between mirthful laughter and flaming outrage.

"Mummy!" roared Fred—or, rather, roared as much as a seven year old could roar—"Ron broke my toy broom!"

"I…I did not!" Ron protested around a mouthful of saliva covered thumb.

"You did so," growled Fred, his bright red hair stand on ends, not unlike a small bonfire. "It was fine before you had a go on it!"

"Ron?" all eyes—except for those of young Ginny who was gleefully ripping tufts of grass from the ground—turned to the flushing boy.

"I…I didn't mean it—"

"Weasleys," Mr. Weasley burst back through the door, now dressed in a slightly worn, but mostly undamaged, navy blue dress robe, "picture time. Places!"

Mrs. Weasley, despite the drama that was growing between Fred and Ron, decided to put off the fight that would, without a doubt, ensue, gave quick orders for the positions of each individual. "Ron, go stand by your sister; twins, you two get between Ginny and Percy—and tuck your shirts in! Go on now."

Ron scurried over to his younger sister (now perched on a small island of grass, intently examining a line of ants), somewhat relieved that Fred had not unleashed his wrath. Mr. Weasley quickly set the camera timer before leaping next to Mrs. Weasley, both of whom were unaware of the wisps of smoke that were rising from the tips of Fred's hair.

"Say cheese!"

However, none of the Weasleys were able to utter the overused photo phrase. Instead, Ron let out a loud, shrill, ear-splitting scream, "Teddy!"

Fred laughed a villainous, maniacal cackle.

Poor Teddy had been turned into a giant hairy black spider. Ron threw down his former stuffed bear, his eyes the size of small saucers. The spider, as though unsure of how to operate its many legs, slowly advanced toward the terrified boy, its bleary eyes full of confusion.

"Teddy!" Ron screeched again.

Mrs. Weasley quickly drew her wand, "Stupify!"

Ginny giggled happily as she grabbed a hold of the Stunned spider, shaking its hairy leg so fiercely that Mrs. Weasley feared that its appendage might be unceremoniously ripped off.

There was a flash of light and the distinct click of the camera as it caught the moment on film.

"Everyone, get in your places again," Mrs. Weasley ordered as she took up the Stunned spider and Vanished it, unaware of the years of psychological grief that would result from the events that had taken place during the last ten seconds.

The family however, especially irate Fred and hysterical Ron, were too flustered to settle back to the original formation. Bill and Charlie attempted to comfort both brothers but only resulted in irritating Fred more and causing Ron to cry loudly for his Teddy. Percy ordered the pair to stop fighting so that mother and father could take the picture so he could go swimming only to have George chuck a handful of cornmeal (he and Fred had casually taken some from the chicken feed) at him. Mr. Weasley attempted to settle his sons down (Ginny decided to reoccupy herself with the ants), but in vain. He finally dismissed the family and took down the camera and its legs as Mrs. Weasley herded the children back into the house to change into more comfortable clothes.

"Well," Mr. Weasley murmured under his breath, "at least we don't have to worry about Ron's teddy bear problem anymore…"

Dysfunctional family?? I think so!! I guess that's why we love the Weasley's so much; they can be pretty crazy, but you know they have each other's back no matter what. Except Percy. Percy's a little ninny.

It's summer now, so I should be able to finish this before DH is released. Maybe (but don't hold me to it!!)

Have any comments? Liked it? Found it annoying?? Didn't like the characterizations?? Leave some feedback in a review!!!

With anticipation,
Chikin Wang