CHAPTER SIX
"How's your Mom?" Sookie asked as Lorelai entered the kitchen at the Inn.
"Still out of it," Lorelai confirmed, walking around the island to see what Sookie was making.
"Then why are you here?" she asked, turning away from her boiling pot.
"I need something to do. It's hard to just sit there and stare at her."
"Have you talked to anyone?" Sookie turned the stove down to simmer and put a lid on the pot, turning towards Lorelai.
"About what?" she asked, picking up an apple and biting into it.
"About how you're feeling …"
"I'm talking now, Sookie."
"That's not what I mean. Have you talked to your Dad or Rory, maybe?"
"Dad and Rory both have good relationships with my mother," she mumbled, as she swallowed a bite of the apple.
"But I'm sure they're scared and worried, too."
Lorelai sighed. She couldn't talk about her mom with either of them. They were all too connected to one another. "I just can't stop thinking about the past." She sat on one of the bar stools. "I never imagined that she might not always be around, you know? All my life she's just been there. We may not talk for weeks or see each other for months, but I always know that she's there. If I really need her or something is really wrong, she'll be there. When I needed the money to pay for Chilton, she gave it to me. Yes she made us come to Friday night dinners, but I knew that I could go to her for the money. I knew that she was there if and when I really needed her."
Sookie stood next to Lorelai. She didn't know what to say in this type of situation. "Have you ever tried just talking to your mother?" Sookie asked. Lorelai looked like she was about to protest. "I know … you guys have a hard time talking. But have you two ever tried just sitting down and not yelling and not screaming and just talking." Lorelai was silent. "I know that she hurt you and that you felt like you were trapped in that house, but you both have a lot of blame and a lot of pain that was caused by the other. I just don't get why you two can't talk to each other."
"It's always the same story, Sookie. I left. I left and I took Rory with me. I kept them out of my life and gave them very little contact with Rory. I broke their hearts and they'll never be able to forget that."
Sookie just couldn't understand the Gilmore family and why they all thought it was so difficult to be a close-knit family. Families hurt each other, but they also forgive each other. "But that changed! That all changed. It changed almost eight years ago when you went to their house to ask them to pay for Chilton. Eight years is a long time to have no progress, Lorelai. You've been back in each other's lives for years … You can't tell me that you don't understand your mother better now and that she doesn't understand you better, too. Yes you guys argue, maybe more than most mothers and daughters, but you're still communicating with each other. That's better than the years that you spent not talking at all except through Rory."
"I don't know, Sookie. Talking just isn't our thing."
"Well, when your mother wakes up, maybe you should make it your 'thing'," she commented, going back to her pot on the stove. "Maybe it's time that the two of you changed. Both of you."
Lorelai sighed. She didn't know what to do or what to think anymore. She just knew that she was worried that it might be too late for her and her mother.
"If she died today," Sookie added, "you'd have regrets." Lorelai looked over at her. "You don't want to have regrets, Lorelai."
"I am sorry to interrupt," came Michel's heavy French accent, "but there is a man here with a big truck full of dirt and he says that he needs somewhere to dump it. I do not deal with this sort of situation… he is dirty and smelly."
"I'll take care of it," Sookie interjected, "go back to the hospital and be with your family." She took Michel's arm, pushing him out of the room and towards the front of the inn with her.
Rory looked across the room at her grandfather. She wanted to say something to him, something to make things better. Yet there was nothing to be said. There were no words of comfort. No one knew anything. As much as she wanted to, she could not tell him that his wife would be okay.
Rory had never seen fear on her grandfather's face before yesterday. She didn't even know it was an emotion that he'd ever experienced. He was always so strong and put together. She had seen him fall apart a bit when his mother died, but that wasn't fear. That was a sense of sadness and loss. This was fear. This was something that she'd never seen in him before. If he was afraid, then she knew it was bad.
Her grandparents were really the only example that she had of true love. Yes, her parents loved each other but it wasn't quite the same. Their love hadn't lasted. It hadn't been enough to keep them together. She had learned love from her mother and how to love others unconditionally, but she had never learned about the kind of love that lasts a lifetime. She had never seen the kind of love that withstands the test of time until she got to know her grandparents. She had seen them during their good and their bad times. She knew that their marriage wasn't perfect. They fought and they argued and they did things that upset each other at times. She knew that her grandfather took his wife for granted sometimes. And perhaps her grandmother was a bit too dependent on her husband. Yet she also knew that they loved each other deeply and that there was never a better match than the two of them. That was why she was so against their separation. She knew that they were both miserable without each other. They were a pair and pairs weren't meant to be separated.
Rory finally broke the silence. "Grandpa, can I ask you something?"
"Of course," he stated, looking in her direction.
"How did you and Grandma meet?" It was the only thing she could think to ask and it was something that she'd always wondered. Her grandparents were so full of mystery at times. They could both be so prim and proper that she often forgot that they, too, had a past and a history before her and her mother.
Richard smiled. "Well, that's quite a story."
Rory perked up. She somehow knew that nothing had ever been simple or boring in either of her grandparents' lives. "I'd love to hear it, if it wouldn't be too much to ask …."
"Of course not," he smiled. Rory smiled, too, at the look in his eyes. She hadn't seen it since they had found Emily in his study. He almost looked happy. "Well, the first time we met and the first time I saw your grandmother are two different stories."
"You mean like you saw her before you met her?" Rory asked. She was intrigued.
Richard nodded. "I was in a café with Pennilyn. The woman drank more coffee than anyone I've ever met, including your mother, if you can believe that. We were supposed to meet her parents for lunch, but we were quite early. So, we stopped in this little café to waste some time. It wasn't really my type of place. There were people everywhere and it was quite loud inside. But Pennilyn wanted to go inside, so I obliged her. The moment we walked inside, I looked around the room and there is this young woman with bright red hair sitting at a table in the corner. I don't know what drew me to her, but I could see nothing else but her."
"Grandma," Rory smiled.
Richard nodded before continuing. "She was all by herself, but she didn't even seem to notice that there were dozens of other people around. It's like she was lost in her own world."
"What was she doing?" Rory asked.
"Writing a paper or something, I suppose," he guessed. He hadn't paid attention to what she had been doing. He had been too struck by her beauty. "I couldn't stop staring at her the entire time. Pennilyn became agitated because she thought I wasn't paying attention to her."
Rory laughed. "Did she know that you were looking at Grandma?"
"I don't think so. She couldn't see Emily. I don't know exactly what it was, but I'd never been so drawn to another person. It was more than just her beauty." He stopped himself. "Now, I'll admit, your grandmother was a stunning woman. Her hair was much brighter than it is now. She dressed very simply, but there was always one element about her that caught your eye and made you think she was the most beautiful woman in the world."
Rory couldn't help but smile. It was touching to hear her grandfather talking so openly. She wondered if he'd ever told Emily about any of this. Somehow she doubted that he had. He seemed too pensive and thoughtful, like he'd never shared it until now.
"Even as beautiful as she was, there was something else about her." He shook his head. "I can't explain it." He was silent, thinking back to that day so many years ago when Emily literally changed his life.
"So, did you get to talk to Grandma or did you guys just leave?"
Richard chuckled at the memory of spilling Emily's coffee. "Well, I did spill coffee on her before we left."
"You did what?" Rory asked, moving to the edge of her chair. "Grandpa!"
Richard laughed at how young and foolish he had been back then. "Well, it was a bit of an accident. I was throwing away our trash and I bumped into her."
"An accident?" Rory asked suspiciously. She didn't quite believe that it had been entirely by accident.
Richard smirked. "The first word out of her mouth was a curse word and she refused to let me help her clean up the mess," he remembered. Rory smiled. That sounded just like the grandmother that she knew. "Pennilyn was already annoyed, so I only had a moment with your grandmother before Pennilyn practically pulled me out the door." He smiled at the memory of Emily's face as he tried to help her dry her books. "I didn't think I'd ever see her again."
"But you did …" Rory hinted, hoping that her grandfather would continue.
Richard nodded. "I did, but it was many weeks later."
Rory was happy that her grandfather was talking to her about how he'd met Emily. He had been so quiet lately. She was worried about him and she knew that her mother was, too. She was also worried about her mother. Despite their problems, she knew that her mother and grandmother loved each other very deeply. Neither of them would get so upset nor feel so hurt by the other if they didn't care so deeply.
Richard continued, "I was visiting Pennilyn at Smith. She had a class that met one day a week and so I agreed to meet her after the class so she could show me around the campus. I was early and I just started walking about trying to pass the time."
Richard looked down at his watch. He still had at least an hour until Pennilyn would be out of class. They were going to the Cape this weekend. It had been a surprise for her birthday. His parents owned a home on the island and he thought it would be the perfect excuse to get away for a few days. They needed some time alone together. Lately things had been pretty dull between them. That spark they once had seemed to be missing. Richard knew that Pennilyn was disappointed in their relationship. She always complained that he wasn't devoted enough to her.
Yet it was he who felt that way about her. He couldn't be certain, but he started to wonder if there was someone else that she was more interested in. Her friend Stephen was always around her apartment when he would stop by. They both vigorously denied that there was anything more than friendship between them, yet he sensed there was more – even if the two of them didn't realize it.
Richard sat down on a bench to rest. He'd been walking around for quite a while now. It was amusing to just sit and watch the happenings at a women's college. There always seemed to be some sort of activity going on. There were young women laughing and chatting with their girlfriends. None of them even seemed to notice him.
There were two girls across the lawn in what looked to be a heated discussion. Richard watched them for a few minutes. One of them was waving her hands in the air and the other was standing there with her arms crossed. It was amusing to try and imagine what they were saying. They both stopped their conversation abruptly when the door to a nearby building opened and a young red-haired woman approached them. They smiled at her as she politely nodded to them before walking on. Richard lost interest in the two girls. He was focused on the redhead. It couldn't be the same girl…
He found himself walking quickly to catch up with her. As he got closer to her, he could tell that she was indeed the same woman. She was dressed in a rather neutral color today. It lightened the effect of the sunlight reflecting off her hair. And she was wearing a skirt, too, which gave Richard a view of her amazingly toned legs. He wondered for a second if she were a dancer.
Richard didn't know what to do next. This had to be a sign, to see her again and here of all places. They were just two random strangers. How likely was it that he'd ever see her again after this? He somehow sensed that this would probably be his last chance. It was foolish, but something told him that he'd regret it if he just let her walk off.
He watched her as her pace slowed down and she took a seat on a bench. She reached into her bag and retrieved a notebook. It was nearly the exact same scene as in the café. She quickly became lost in her own world, flipping through her notes. He watched her from afar. It made no sense that he could be so intrigued by someone that he didn't know and technically hadn't even met. There was just something about her that he couldn't let go of. He'd thought about her for days after their "meeting." He chided himself many times for being so foolish to pine over a woman that he'd never see again. He'd finally convinced himself to stop thinking about her and yet here she was again. He couldn't help but wonder if it was a sign. Or was he just being foolish … again?
Richard finally just decided to go for it. What did he have to lose? If he didn't at least make an attempt, he knew that he would regret it. So, he walked over to where she was sitting. It was a rather lame line, but it was all he could think to say. "Do you mind if I sit down?" he asked.
Emily looked up at him startled and slightly annoyed that someone had bothered her. She was about to make a snide comment when she saw his face. Her heart literally stopped beating for a few seconds as her brain registered that he was the same man. It was exactly like before. They just stared at each other until he finally spoke again. "May I?" he asked, motioning to the empty spot next to her.
"Of course," she agreed. "As long as you don't plan on spilling anything on me today."
Richard was uncertain what to make of her comment, but he caught the sparkle in her eyes and saw that she was smiling. He laughed, relieved.
"I can't apologize enough…"
"Oh please don't," Emily said, waving her hand in the air. "It was a bad paper. I needed an excuse to have to rewrite it anyways."
Richard couldn't avoid looking in her eyes. It was as if he'd met her a million times before and not just once.
He suddenly realized that he didn't even know her name nor did she know his. "I'm Richard," he added.
She smiled. She already knew his name. "Emily," she said softly. He loved the sound of her voice.
"It's nice to meet you, Emily … Or nice to meet you again, I should say." She smiled again. That smile. It caught him every time.
They sat silent for a few moments before she suddenly remembered it was nearly time for her next class. She had already been late more than once this semester and the professor wasn't that fond of her. Last week she had vehemently disagreed with his viewpoint on the causes of the French Revolution and she knew that she wasn't in his good graces. It would be foolish to be late today of all days, when he'd told her to come to class with documentation supporting her opinions. "I'm sorry, but I have to go." She stood up and Richard followed her lead, rising to his feet.
He couldn't just let her go, not after having the luck to run into her again. "Would you have dinner with me?" he asked. He couldn't quite believe himself, asking another woman to dinner when he was here to see Pennilyn. Yet he just couldn't let her go without knowing that he would see her again.
"I don't usually date men that I've just met," she commented, putting her notebook into her bag.
"Well, we've technically met before."
His heart fluttered as she smiled again and laughed. "I suppose that you're right."
"There is a new exhibit opening at the Yale University Art Gallery. It's supposed to be quite an impressive collection."
"And when does this exhibit open?" she asked.
"Next Tuesday," he confirmed.
Emily nodded. There was just something about this man. She didn't know what it was but she had never felt this way before about a total stranger. It was quite odd. She found herself agreeing to go with him before she knew what she'd done.
"I have no clue why she agreed to go," Richard commented, looking up at his granddaughter.
"Maybe she was as crazy about you as you were about her," Rory suggested, happy to know the story of how her grandparents had met.
"I wouldn't call it love at first sight, but there was something about your Grandmother that I couldn't quite comprehend. I just somehow knew that she was meant to be part of my life."
"That's so sweet," Rory cooed.
Richard's smile faded as he looked over at his wife. "I can't imagine my life without her. It's not been perfect, but she's given me so many wonderful years. So many years that I've taken her for granted," he commented sadly. He wondered why it is that you never realize what you have until you are about to lose it. He shook his head, disappointed to think of all the times that he came home late or stood her up for dinner or a social engagement that she wanted to attend with him.
"She knows that you love her," Rory tried to reassure him.
Richard sighed. "I'm sure she does. I just wish that I'd told her more often what a wonderful wife she is. She does everything for me. I don't think I ever realized how much I depend on her." He stood up, moving next to her to brush his hand against the side of her face.
"You depend on each other," she commented. "You guys are a team," Rory said, moving to stand next to him.
Richard nodded. "I guess we are," he surmised. "I just hope that she wakes up soon."
"Me too," Rory agreed.
Richard looked over at her. He was constantly amazed by his granddaughter and her strength. He had very high expectations of anyone with the Gilmore name yet she always managed to surpass his expectations. He knew that she was worried. She, of everyone, had spent the least amount of time with her grandmother. They had only just begun to get to know each other.
"You know, your grandmother became a different woman the day you came back into our lives. Something happened to her when your mother left. I felt like I'd lost the woman that I once loved. The moment she read that letter, she changed. It was like she was afraid to open herself up and let people in, including me. Our entire relationship changed. It took a while for us to find a new routine. It took a while for her to forgive herself, I guess. I sometimes wonder how we made it through that time." Richard looked at his granddaughter and smiled. "And then came Friday night dinners and I finally saw the woman that I had fallen in love with. She was animated and just … happy. It was all because of you."
"I don't know about that," Rory admitted shyly.
Richard nodded. "You underestimate yourself, Rory. Your grandmother is quite fond of you." He smiled, putting his arm around his granddaughter. "And so am I. You've changed our lives in a way that we never imagined possible."
Rory smiled back at him. "You guys have changed mine, too. I'm glad that I've gotten to know you guys better and be part of your lives these past few years." She took a deep breath. "You know, Grandpa … whatever happens … that won't change."
"I know," he whispered, looking once again at his wife.