"You're not really dating Professor Snape are you?" Neville asked, looking absolutely panicked.
"He's evil! You're so lovely Professor Tingstrom; you just can't be dating him!" Luna squealed.
I sigh and look at my two favorite students. I know that Severus doesn't like them; they're his least favorite students next to Harry. But I don't care; he can just deal with the fact that they're my squishes. Now the only thing is to calm the poor dears down. "Neville, Luna, where have you been hearing all this?"
"Isabelle Fairbrooke told Cho Chang and Cho told me!" Luna said, "Is it true?"
"What exactly did you hear?" I asked, trying to asses the damage.
"That you two were snogging!" Neville screeched.
Damn it. "Children, even if I was dating Professor Snape that wouldn't in any way affect my relationship to you."
"Is that supposed to be an answer?" Luna glared.
"No. You two know I love you very much, but who I have personal relations with really isn't any of your business. Now, isn't it time for you both to be going down to lunch?"
They sighed and Neville looked at Luna, "I told you that she wouldn't answer."
I raised my eyebrow at them.
"We're going." Neville pouted, going out of the room next to Luna.
I shook my head. If I was being completely honest with myself, I would have loved to tell them that I was dating Severus. But the fact is... I don't even know if I am dating Severus. Last night he was very sweet... well, for him anyway. It was lovely. But this morning he was all scowls and pointedly ignoring me. I tried to say something to him and he yelled at me and called me things that I didn't really catch and it's probably better that way. That man's more mixed up than a bag of chex mix. I've been wondering all morning what the hell I could have done to piss him off. I know him well enough to know that it's possible that I've done nothing wrong and he's just going through some sort of inner turmoil and that I should just back off until he gets it all right in his head. I love the man, really I do, but whatever he's going through is a personal problem. It's not my job to jump to attention every time a chemical squirts through his brain and pisses him off, I'll just be here when he finally gets over it. He hasn't said he loves me by the way, not even that he really likes me. Just that he wants me. In the end, what the hell does that mean anyway? He wants me. How much does he want me? What does he want me for? Why does he want me? How long does he want me? None of this was answered. The damn, stupid man. My dog whining at the door wanted me too, but that didn't fill me with happiness. Why the hell was I so giddy about him wanting me last night? I really am pathetic.
----------------------------------
"You look awful." Remus said tenderly as we walked to lunch together.
"Ah, you have such a way with words Remus. It's almost unbelievable that women aren't throwing themselves at your feet." I snarled.
He frowned, "That's not exactly fair."
I sighed, "I know, I'm sorry. I probably do look horrible."
He wrapped an arm around my shoulders, "What's wrong?"
I laid my head on his shoulder, "You've heard the rumors about Severus and me kissing last night?"
"People in China heard about Severus and you kissing last night. But frankly, since Severus was acting so cold to you earlier I naturally assumed that nothing had happened between you."
"Exactly."
"Ohhh..." He said, looking as if he was searching for words. "Severus is a... complicated man."
I rolled my eyes, "No offense, but I hate men." I looked at Remus, "No, I don't hate men. I just hate him. Do you think if I poisoned him he'd find an antidote in time?"
Remus laughed, "You know that you don't mean that."
I sighed, "I'm starting to wish I hadn't kissed him last night."
"That's understandable considering his reaction today."
I shook my head, "And I'm beginning to sound like one of our students. I'm not made for this sort of drama."
He rubbed my back, "Nobody is Katherine."
I looked up at him, "Why are you always listening to me anyway Remus? You've got problems of your own."
He smiled, "It's a welcome distraction. Now come on, I'll protect you from Severus and maybe this will all blow over in a day or so. Then things can go back to normal."
I smiled and nuzzled into his shoulder, "Thanks Remus."
He smiled and kissed the top of my head, "You're welcome."
-----------------------------------
I crossed my arms on the table and laid my head on them. Remus smiled down at me and petted my hair, I smiled up at him. Severus walked in and when he saw what Remus was doing he gave us a look that could have peeled paint from a wall.
Remus smiled politely at him, "Hello Severus."
Severus just kind of snarled at him as he sat down.
I sat up and the food soon came around. I was drinking some pumpkin juice as Remus explained the lesson he was doing today when I caught Severus glaring at the two of us. I nearly choked as it hit me. Severus was jealous of Remus! That's why he had snarled at me last night and this morning! And why he was snarling right now too! He's jealous of Remus and my relationship. I burst out laughing and both Remus and Severus looked at me as if I was crazy. Why hadn't I picked up on it before? Maybe because nobody had ever, ever gotten up enough feeling to be jealous for the sake of me before? Because nobody had ever been possessive of me before, even when they had outright said they loved me? Because, out of all the romantics, all the sensitive, needy, sweet men I had dated before the man that cares enough about me to be possessive and not want to see me with another man was Severus Snape? Oh, that was just so ironic I might just burst into tears. I got up and touched Remus on the shoulder as I left. By this time the entire school was staring at me, so leaving was a good idea.
------------------------------------------
A few days later Severus was still sulking and I didn't have any more time to worry about it. It was Christmas vacation and I was going to America to see if there was anything of my old life there. I knew whatever I found would make me sad, but it would be good to get closure. I didn't tell Remus the exact details, I tilted it more along the lines of me wanting to see my homeland again and he understood that.
I was finished packing. I'd put my old clothes in my carry on bag along with some books and hygiene products. I mostly only packed underwear in my regular suitcase because I had a feeling going around in my regular clothes wasn't an option in the muggle world, even this muggle world. I was taking a plane to America and so I put my ticket safely in my carry on bag. Remus walked with me to the train station, we were going to ride the train together until London where I would get off. Remus was spending the holiday with Harry and Sirius (surprise, surprise).
"I'll miss you." Remus said tenderly, looking down at me with a soft smile.
I smiled softly up at him, "I'll miss you too Remus. But it's only for a few weeks."
He nodded, "I suppose."
I gave him a sideways hug.
We were about to get onto the train when I felt someone take my arm and turn me around. My eyes widened, "Severus?"
"Where are you going?!?" He demanded.
I frowned at him, "its Christmas break, I'm going on a holiday. Where did you think I was going?"
"And you're going with him?" Severus hissed, pointing at Remus.
I raised my eyebrows. Had Severus been dipping into the firewhiskey? "Yes... why wouldn't I be going with him?"
For the first time ever, Severus actually looked sad. "Don't you care about me at all?"
Ok, now I'm confused. "Severus, I don't understand what you're..."
The train whistle blew.
"Come on Katherine, the train's leaving." Remus said gently from the doorway of the train.
I turned to him, "Alright, I'm coming."
He nodded and went into the train.
I looked at Severus and put my hand gently on his arm, "I've got to go now Severus. We can talk more about this when I get back."
He shook his head, "Don't go."
I didn't really know what to say to that. What was wrong? I got on my tiptoes and despite how he'd been treating me; I kissed him softly on the lips. "I'll see you soon Severus."
I freed myself from his grip and got onto the train. I found Remus and he looked up at me, "What was that all about?"
I shook my head, "I really don't know..."
-----------------------------------
I was going off to the bathroom when someone in another compartment grabbed my arm and pulled me inside. I looked up, "Severus?"
He looked me in the eyes, "I'm not going to let you do this!"
"Do what? Are you upset that I'm going to America? That I'm flying on a plane?" I asked, fed up at this point.
"But why must you go with Remus?" He asked hopelessly.
My eyes widened. Oh... hell... no. "Severus Snape... were you under the impression that I was going off to have some sort of love affair with Remus?"
His eyes widened and he backed away a little, looking embarrassed.
I pointed at him, "Severus Snape, what exactly do you think that I'm doing with you? Do you think that I'm playing both you and Remus? Like some sort of game? One moment I'm with one of you, the next I'm with the other? Is that the sort of woman that you think I am? I'll have you know that I've never shown feelings for one person and then gone off with someone else. If I'm kissing you, then it's only you in my life. I didn't even kiss anyone before you damn it! It's pathetic but true! And what do I get for it? Jealousy and suspicion! Haven't you figured out that I'm in love with you, you lack wit? I adore you and all you can do is oomph!"
Severus had pulled me to him and was kissing me so passionately that I absolutely melted. I had to wrap my arms around his neck to keep from sliding away. He pushed me against the wall and deepened the kiss. So this was what really snogging felt like.
He cupped my cheeks and looked into my eyes, "I love you too. I love you and the thought of you with Remus or any other man drives me crazy!"
I gulped, "Obviously..."
He kissed me on my forehead, down my cheek, down to my neck where he whispered, "I don't want you to leave..."
My mind was about to explode, "Well, my ticket is refundable..."