Authors note: This is a chapter is about Makubex's walk, and ch8 will be Ban's search for him.

In ch8 it will continue from the time that Ban left the fortress in ch7 and searches for Makubex in ch9 (this happens near the end of makubex's walk.)

Ban is searching for Makubex near the end of his walk. Get it? The time overlaps as they are walking at the same time

This chapter continues right from the time that Makubex left the fortress in ch6.

(ch8 is about Maku chan's walk and ch9 is about Ban chan's walk which occur at the same time, as Ban is looking for Ginji )

My inspiration: "The kill" by 30 seconds to mars. I was listening to it while I wrote this.

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Chapter 8: the escape

Blindly, he stepped out of the fortress. Sunlight penetrated his eyes, causing them to water. He used his arm to shield his face from the blinding light. The dark room had caused him to forget how bright it was outside. He lifted his head and walked a few steps. Makubex glanced back at the fortress. He then looked away and proceeded to leave his past behind. The further he strayed, the more pleasant everything became.

He walked down a dark alley that led him into a park. The grass was green and lush. He saw children playing in a playground and various people walking around, conversing with one another. Makubex stopped, when he spotted a woman with shiny brown hair and a man with short black hair holding hands. They appeared to be a happy couple. The one thing that he knew he could not achieve.

They look so…happy.

He turned around and faced the opposite direction so no one could see. His eyes welled with tears. Makubex lowered his head, and covered his face with his hands. Was happiness to much to ask? Apparently it was, as it was something that he never had. Even as a child he manipulated the virtual world in order to make up for the lack of control he had in the real world. Nothing made sense anymore. He had achieved so many accomplishments that most people cannot. Yet one thing that any average person can get is impossible to reach. He always figured that there was someone for everyone. Now he realized that it was more complicated than that. Someone who wants another person has to be right in the eyes of the other person as well. Both people have to be right for each other.

Maybe he could have someone else. He knew very well that he could find someone who felt the same way about him. Someone who would accept him for who he was. But he didn't want just anyone. He wanted the impossible. He wanted someone who didn't, and will never think of him in the same way. Makubex didn't know how or why but he adored Ginji. He just loved him. Not one thing, but everything. Everything he said. Everything he did. Every expression of his face. Every blink of his eye. Every motion of his hand. Every hair on his head that slightly shifted in the wind. Every rise of his chest as he slept soundly.

He walked away from the park and the lovers. Makubex walked down the sidewalk near another alley. A raindrop splashed on his nose. As the rainfall increased, he could hear it patter on the sidewalk. He crossed a road and entered a sea of people. Even though the sidewalk was crowded, he felt alone. Completely isolated from the other people. They were in their own world as he was in his. Worried with their own worries. Concerned in their own matters. He marveled at the invisible barrier between the unacquainted. He couldn't just talk to any random person. There are crossroads that divide people from their own life and the lives of others. You can't stand there and talk because they are going somewhere just like you. You have your own path as well. There are different destinations to be met and you can't go both places at the same time.

If a person does, then they go to someone else's destination and lose their own. They would be following someone else's path. Living a lie…

He couldn't stand the crowd of the ignorant and materialistic, so he cut into the nearest alley. The alley was more like a small street that ran between houses. He saw into a window and spotted a family eating dinner together. The kitchen window was cracked open. Makubex felt the emanating warmth from outside. It made him feel hollow and sick to the stomach, so he walked on.

He could not bring himself to accept the truth. It's not possible to love someone when the love itself was never real. He loved the idea of Ginji: someone from his childhood that could love and protect him as he had in the past. It was then he realized that his object of desire had never existed.

Makubex stopped and leaned his back against the alley wall. Three small boys played tag, chasing each other back and forth. One tagged the other and then the other chased the third. He stared blankly at the children and watched as the shadows danced on the concrete wall.

Children are living proof that ignorance is bliss.

If only he was ignorant. If only he was narrow minded. His vast depth of intellect was making him miserable. Everything is overanalyzed. Everything is a big deal. In these ways he envied the children. Unlike him they were average boys sheltered by their family. If only he had a family.

I do have family. There's Sakura, Jubei…and…

Ginji…