A/N: This is kind of a non-descript me-just-playing-around bit. I rather enjoyed how it came out at the time and now, I still like it. :) Go me! (laugh)
For anyone that's interested: I know a few people remember when one of these chapters was a Saiyuki MadLib. A lot of people enjoyed it, but FFN's no interaction rule may apply, so I haven't reposted that chapter. To get around this, you can go to my profile and follow the homepage link to my LiveJournal, where I've posted the MadLib, as well as my mom's answers, for anyone to see. Heh. It was fun to read that one again. Made me want to wake her up and make her do the prompts again. (evil grin)
Thank you for the reviews, everyone, and I hope you enjoy this chapter:)
Chapter 13: First Lesson
He was going out of his mind.
Weary with frustration and homicidal thoughts, Konzen sat back in his chair and rubbed the bridge of his nose with one hand, the other tightly clenching the armrest of his chair. It was only eight o'clock in the morning and he already had a migraine coming on. The minute he woke up he knew something was wrong - the entire place was way too quiet. He'd dressed quickly, knowing that silence equals trouble, especially when you live with a loud, obnoxious, curious and trouble making monkey child. The sight that had greeted him when he entered his study had left him speechless for a good five minutes, and only after he'd regained his mind did he sit down before he fell down.
The entire office was an absolute disaster area; papers and books were flung about, some torn, most covered with dirt and bits of grass. His desk, which had once held a neatly stack pile of papers, was now soaking wet, not to mention covered with the remains of a vase; the pieces of which were now scattered about the desktop and on the floor. A few drips of blood spoke that someone had tried to clean the mess up at one time, no doubt the cause of the tornado-like destruction that he was now viewing: Goku.
He opened his eyes, willing the horrifying images to have fled in the duration of time in which he'd been driving away thoughts of killing the boy, only to be met with everything just as it had been. A small thud caught his attention then, and Konzen's gaze wondered about the room until it fell on a small closet in the corner. Another soft thud and he stood up, stalking over to the door and flinging it open. A very wide-eyed and terrified Goku tumbled out, spilling onto the floor in front of Konzen's feet. A look of pure relief came over the boy's face and in a flash he stood up and was hugging his guardian with the ferocity of a fan girl.
"Ah, Konzen I was so scared in there! I couldn't get out! You saved me, Konzen! Thank you thank you thank you thank you…."
He listened as the boy continued on, wondering if the child was going to get to the part where his office had been turned into a nuclear disaster area or not…
Steeling his anger, Konzen managed to beat back the flashes of homicide again and asked very slowly and in a neutral voice.
"What in the HELL happened in here?"
Goku's head snapped up, his golden eyes impossibly large as he stared up into Konzen's face. A few stray tears had already made their way down his cheeks and only then did the deity notice the bruises that were beginning to form on the boy's face and neck.
Konzen squatted down, worry and curiosity replacing any anger as he noticed more bruises littering what he could see of his charges body.
"What the hell happened in here, Goku? Who did this?"
The earth-child sniffed slightly, hesitant to give an answer but knowing he couldn't remain silent forever. He'd just opened his mouth to speak when another voice interrupted.
"Good, I see you found him."
Both looked up, greeted by the sight of a very flustered and slightly angry looking Tenpou standing in the entranceway.
The blond could feel his anger rising again.
"What happened, Tenpou?"
The brunet stepped forward, clearing a few bits of paper from a nearby couch and sitting down.
"Baseball." He said with a soft sigh.
Konzen's brows furrowed together. "Excuse me?"
"We, being myself and Kenren, wanted to teach Goku baseball."
"And what does that have to do with my office looking like a complete disaster area? And why the hell does he look like someone beat the shit out of him?"
The Field Marshall sighed again. "We couldn't find a baseball. So we used a tennis ball instead. We were only going to teach Goku how to catch and throw first, then go outside to play the game."
Konzen nodded, having a feeling he already knew where this story was heading.
"We had no idea Goku had such a strong arm though." Tenpou waved his hand around the room. "All this was caused by the tennis ball bouncing around, and our attempts to try and stop it."
"And the bruises?" the blond asked roughly, pointing to the boy still wrapped around him.
"Well…it was a pretty hard throw…and we all kind of got in its way a few times…"
"So you're telling me that a tennis ball did all this." He asked, waving his hand to indicate the sordid mess around them. "And caused all of this?" he gestured to the black and blue boy beside him.
"Yes."
Konzen sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose again.
"Why were you in the closet?" he asked, not looking up.
Goku sniffled before answering. "I..I knew you'd be mad at me…cause of the mess and…and…"
"He tried to clean it up, Konzen, he really did. He's got the band-aids on his fingers to prove it."
The blonde looked down, seeing a borage of cartoon-decorated bandages littering the child's fingers.
"Goku just got a little too upset because he knew you'd be waking up soon and he panicked. He took off outside and Kenren and I have been looking for him ever since."
Konzen looked down at the sniffling monkey. "Why did you hide in the closet?"
"…I dunno…"
He sighed again. "It's all right."
Goku's head snapped up and he rubbed one red eye with the back of his hand. "R-really Konzen?"
The blonde sighed yet again. "Yes. Idiot. It was an accident, right? You three clean it up and no more throwing balls inside again, got it?"
The earth-child smiled, nodded his head so fast it looked as if it would snap off and quickly bounced to Tenpou.
"Come on Tenpii! Let's clean up! Come ooonnnn!" he grabbed the Marshall's hand, pulling and grunting until the man stood with a light chuckle.
"All right, Goku. We'll start cleaning. I'm sure Kenren will check back here soon."
A few hours later and the entire office was back to new, not one hint of the destructive properties of three idiots and a tennis ball showing through. Konzen had been surprised to find all his papers stacked back up, the ones that were not savable having been copied by hand by Tenpou. The two older Gods had left, leaving Goku with a pad and a box of crayons to keep him occupied until they found an actual baseball that they could use to teach him how to play.
Konzen allowed himself to watch as Goku doodled on the provided paper aimlessly, no doubt only wasting time until the Marshall and General returned to teach him the new game. His wandering scribbles were just starting to manifest into something resembling a picture (which from the blond's view looked like a bloated hippo rolling on wheat; amusing to later learned it was suppose to be him…) when a polite knock resounded in the room, followed by the door being rudely slammed open by Kenren. Tenpou stared straight ahead, his hand still positioned in mid-air before slowly lowering it down and then quickly elbowing the General in the ribs.
"We found a baseball!" he announced, holding the white ball up like a trophy.
"Oh, goodie." Konzen muttered.
"Goodieeee!" Goku leapt to his feet, all traces of the once calm and quiet boy doodling on a paper on the floor were completely eradicated.
A few seconds later and Konzen was nose to nose with an excited, all but panting Goku, whose imaginary tail was shimming with his rear as large golden eyes sparkled up in an unasked question.
The blond sighed in resignation. "Don't break any-"
He blinked slowly, having opened his eyes to find the three had totally disappeared.
It was only ten minutes later when the door burst open yet again, causing Konzen to nearly jump in surprise. He honestly had expected to practically drag Goku back in for bed. Looking up, he saw Tenpou leading the boy in, one hand resting on the younger brunet's shoulder and mumbling words of comfort along the way. Kenren followed behind, looking worried and guilty at the same time, causingKonzen to narrow his eyes slightly.
Now what?
He finally settled his gaze on Goku; the earth-child was crying, actually it was more like wailing really, and holding his hands over his nose. Konzen stared at the scene for a moment before he saw the first trickle of blood escaping from between the child's fingers.
"What the hell…"
Until he was bending down in front of the weeping boy, Konzen hadn't even realized he'd stood up.
"The ball bounced off a rock and hit him right in the nose." Tenpou said with a sigh. "Apparently baseball isn't such a good idea today."
"You think?" Konzen snorted, gently prying Goku's hands away to inspect the newest damage.
The child's nose was swollen, the traces of a large black-and-blue mark already forming close to his eye, indicating the hit hadn't just landed on his nose, but off to the side. He inspected softly, ignoring Goku's winces and wails as he prodded, until he was satisfied that nothing was broken.
"Get me some ice." He said, voice weary from the day's continuing disasters.
Kenren jumped to comply, a fact that told the blond that he'd most likely been the one to throw the ball before it had done its damage. When the General returned, Konzen took the towel-wrapped ice and placed it on the back of the earth-child's neck. He drew his finger perpendicular to Goku's nose and pressed at it above his lip. The boy blinked at him, blatantly curious to his guardian's actions.
Feeling the stares on him,Konzen surmised that Goku wasn't the only curious one in the room.
"Old trick to stopping nose bleeds." He grumbled.
And, indeed, a few moments later Goku's nose had stopped dripping.
A few apologies and promises of a better try next time later, Tenpou and Kenren had left, leaving Konzen with a still sniffling Goku. He grumbled slightly, but led his charge towards the bathroom and proceeded to clean the blood from his face and hands.
He worked in silence, the brunet boy chewing on his bottom lip, Konzen's give-a-way that the child had something on his mind, but was reluctant to talk about. As he moved to Goku's hands, he heard a slight intake of breath and readied himself for something stupid to pour out.
"Hey, Konzen?"
"Hm."
"Would you…would you teach me how to play baseball?"
The deity froze in his actions, the simple question having been the absolute last possibility for things that could pop out of his charge's mouth. Looking up, he could see the innocent determination lying behind the boy's golden eyes.
"You still want to learn?"
Goku nodded.
"Even after all this?"
He nodded again.
"Why?"
"Why not?"
Konzen thought on this for a moment then shook his head. "You'll probably get hurt more."
"I know."
"You're willing to risk the pain?"
Goku smiled slightly. "Well, I'll never learn without it, will I?"
Konzen smiled softly in response as he finished cleaning the blood from the child's hands.
(500 years later, after a random encounter with Homura)
"Ow!"
"Well hold still! Idiotic monkey…"
Goku pouted slightly, but kept his arm still, watching as Sanzo's continued to stitch the flesh together again. From the corner of his eye he could see Hakkai tending to himself and Gojyo and prided that besides Sanzo, he was the least injured of the four.
"When do you think he'll show up next, Sanzo?"
The monk grunted slightly. "Idiot. One would think you wouldn't be so willing to see him again so soon."
The brunet drew his brows together and frowned. "Then one would be wrong."
Sanzo paused in his work, looking up to see the blind determination in the teen's eyes.
"He'll just keep kicking your ass you know."
"I know."
They fell quiet as the monk finished up and began cleaning and dressing Goku's arm.
"You that eager to take a beating?"
Goku smiled slightly, watching as Sanzo taped off the bandage and stood up to look down at him. Standing up as well, he picked up the monk'sfan from the floor and handed it to the blond with a smirk on his face.
"Is there another way to learn?"
Sanzo watched as the teen made his way out the door, no doubt to try and beg some food from the inn's staff. Stuffing the fan into the folds of his robes, he fought back the smile that tried to work its way onto his lips.
'No.' he thought to himself wryly. 'It's not the only way to learn. Just the most effective.'
Business as usual.
Making mistakes-whether they be painful or extremely embarrassing, are the most difficult part of life. Yet those grand mistakes are the ones that are oft times the least repeated.
If only the world could learn in unison, so many things would be different.
Until then-learn from your own and laugh at them. They also make the best stories later in life.
(-end chapter-)
A/N: Yes, the nose-bleed thing works. I've personally tested this out. Though I woke up with my nose bleed, which was an oddity in itself...