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"They call it the Dementor's Kiss,"said Lupin with a slightly twisted smile. "It's the fate that awaits Sirius Black. It was in the Daily Prophet this morning. The Ministry have given the dementors permission to perform it if they find him."
"He deserves it ,"Harry said suddenly.
"You think so?" said Lupin lightly. "Do you really think anyone deserves that?" J.K.Rowling Book 3
Sirius's p.o.v
In third person.
There is an island in the middle of a sea. It is surrounded by what wizards call Dementors. The prisoners there don't need any other security for the Dementors suck every single happy thought from their minds, most go mad within weeks. Yet there is an exception to every rule, and the exception to this one is Sirius Black.
Fourth row and third to the right in a ten by ten prison cell lies a man curled up in a corner. You hear him muttering "I'm innocent, I'm innocent." yet you wonder why he's able to remember that thought. The dementors are suppose to suck all happy thoughts away from the prisoners and why wouldn't innocence be a happy thought?
Flashback
Fear is coursing through is body. He's silently cursing his motorcycle why the hell isn't it flying any faster. He doesn't know that anything is wrong, yet all the same he's worried. He's almost at the James's house, yet he knows, yet he sees. Forty feet from Lily and James's house and he can already see the remains of their house. Now he what Voldemort has done. He's in the house and staring at James's dead body, collapsing beside him he can't believe it. He can't believe Prongs, is best friend, his brother is dead. Now he knows what he's done.
End Flashback
He's in so much pain. He sometimes wishes he were dead instead of this feeble existence. He hates knowing that he's the only one who knows the truth. The truth about the person who he once called a friend. But what he hates the most isn't Wormtail, but the fact that he believes that he as good as killed James and Lily. That maybe if he hadn't persuaded Lily and James to change secret keeper they'd both still be alive and Harry his godson, would have his parents.
Ever since he landed in Azakan he can't help but wonder whether his mother was right. Whether all he is, is a disgrace. How much better would James's life had been if he never knew him? How much better would Lily's, Harry's, Remus's and even Peters have been?
- - - - - & - - - - -
He knows that he's innocent, yet that's not a happy feeling, but it's what keeps him sane. He hears things being where he is. Voldemort's supporters all think Peter's dead. The fact that he's not, the fact that Peter betrayed his best friends, his family to Voldemort is something he will never forget. When he closes his eyes he can still recall the gleaming look of triumph in Peter's eyes right before he screamed to the crowd of fifty people that "he"(Sirius) betrayed Lily and James to Voldemort, before blasting them.
This man, he once considered family, trusted beyond all, killed his brother. Sometimes he wants to only feel as if he merely has an over active imagination. For that would mean he made everything that happened in that past year up. That it was just a story he made up and any minute will rejoin reality.
He still remembers those summers The Mauraders (sp?) all spent together at James's house. James, Him, Remus, and Peter. They all would with glee rejoice in playing their latest quiddtich match pinning Maurader against Maurader. He remembers a particular moment when James, once again turned down by Lily, dejectedly walks back to them on the grounds. Wormtail already knowing what happened by the look on James's face walks towards him and says "James no matter what happens with girls and what not, we'll always have each. Once a Maurader, forever a Maurader." James breaks out with his huge smile and says to himself and to us ( the Mauraders) "yea, forever" and with that we all agreed.
Cradle to Grave we use to joke, but now the jokes on us. But maybe me more so. If I hadn't told James and Lily to switch secret keepers they'd still be alive. He took me in when my family disown me. I as good as killed my brother.
On the outside the wizarding world see a man, who can't possibly be a man. He, Sirius Black a great mass murderer. The man who not only killed thirteen people with a single curse, but committed the the greatest act of betrayal, the betrayal of a brother. What the wizarding world doesn't see is a man finally broken. All traces of the famous "Booming Black" smile and laughter have disappeared as fast as his life went crashing down around him. His innocence, mattering only to him. That is this man's last cling to hope. The same man who once showered laugher and joy into younger students daily life and showed them. Who also showed them how to hope, with his harmless pranks. He now sits alone in his cell, surrounded by dementors, and an sea away from any hope.