Chapter 5

Life Decisions

The summer ended with the Datsun dent-free and gleaming a glorious shade of red. Don ran his hand along her hood and grinned the most satisfied grin that Lynn had ever seen on his face.

"You know, I could make you that happy, if only you'd let me," she stated.

"Maybe someday I will," he replied.

"How about tonight? We can celebrate the end of your love affair with that car."

"Ah, no, this baby will have my heart for a long, long time."

"What about me?"

"What do you mean?"

"Is there room in that heart of yours for me?"

He wasn't comfortable with the turn in the conversation, but wasn't surprised either. They had been dating for almost six months, which was a long time for cadet couples at the Academy. Everyone already thought that they had taken their relationship to the next level, and Lynn wasn't about to correct them.

"Lynn, you know I'm not ready to commit to anybody right now," he explained.

"I'm not asking for a commitment. I just think we should be doing more than just holding hands," she replied.

"We are doing more than holding hands," he said with a twinkle in his eye.

"Well, I'm ready for more."

Most guys would have jumped into bed with her long ago, and Don wondered if there was something wrong with him. "It's just that I like you, Lynn. I like you too much to lead you on. I'll be gone in nine months and you'll still be here. Then what?"

Lynn was saving this news for a more romantic setting, but maybe it would lead to one…

"Don, there's something I haven't told you. I'm going to apply to the pilot training program in Houston when I graduate. If I'm accepted, I'll be following you this time next year."

He wrinkled his brow. She had always talked politics, not flying. "I thought you wanted to end up in Washington. When did this happen?"

"Your enthusiasm has rubbed off on me. I think I'm good enough for Houston."

"I know your good enough, but is it what you really want?"

What she really wanted was him, but she wasn't about to scare him off. "It is."

Colleen, Maureen's older sister, was like a second mother to Judy. She and her husband, Jim, had raised Maureen after their parent's had died in a plane crash, and when Maureen and John married, Colleen took care of Judy while they finished school. Colleen hugged Judy before she boarded the plane back to Texas and didn't want to let her go. She had offered Judy the chance to live with her if she chose not to join her family on the mission, but Judy hadn't accepted her offer, at least, not yet.

"You know that you always have a home with us, Judy," Colleen said.

"Thank you, Aunt Colleen," Judy replied.

"Judy, promise me you'll think about coming back?" Joan begged.

"I will, Joan. I have to give the training a chance, but I'll come back next summer and decide what to do then."

September soon gave way to the holidays and then spring came quickly. The training at Alpha Control wasn't all that different from school with regard to academic work. Since the children had always felt like misfits to a certain extent, they adapted well to spending all their time with adults. Penny and Will excelled at their studies, but Judy found much of the work boring. It was only her parents' high expectations that kept her motivated. Her former high school was staging its spring musical production and Judy couldn't bring herself to see it. She made a decision, however, for the upcoming summer. She would visit Joan again, but would join a summer stock company whose productions she had seen on her previous vacation. She was counting the days to the end of the school year, anxious to make the trip back to California.

T Minus 3 Years and 5 Months…

Lynn attended Don's graduation and met his family, which was large and boisterous. He was the youngest of six children, and all had come to see their baby brother graduate as a first lieutenant. He was transferring to the Houston pilot training facility within days and he had made a decision that would affect his life and that of those who loved him. The West family and Lynn were having a raucous dinner at a local restaurant that they had reserved in advance for their large party. Sometime during the evening, Don found time to speak with his father alone. "Dad, I have something I need to talk with you about."

"Uh, oh… Don't you think you're a little young to be getting married?" his father asked.

"Married?"

"She's a cute girl, but don't you want to wait until you're done your training?"

Don shook his head, "I'm not going to get married. In fact, marriage is out of the question."

His father lifted his eyebrows in anticipation.

"You know I've always wanted to be an astronaut," Don said.

His father, a retired Air Force colonel, chuckled, "You've wanted to be an astronaut forever, not to mention that you're already one of the best damned pilots I've ever seen at your age."

"Dad, I want to volunteer for the colonization program. I want to pilot the Jupiter 2."

His father had no idea what to say. His son was volunteering to be among the first people to travel to the other side galaxy to an unknown planet for the good of mankind's future. He cleared his throat and extended his hand to Don. "I've never been as proud of anyone in my life as I am of you right now, son."

Don took his hand in both of his own. "Thanks, Dad. That means more to me than any medal or rank the Air Force could give me."

"You know that your mother will be inconsolable, but, if it's what you really want she'll be all right... eventually."

At the end of dinner retired Colonel Mark West tapped his knife against his wine glass.

"I'd like all of your eyes on me, please." He waited a few more moments, and then proceeded. "Our family has grown by leaps and bounds in the thirty-eight years that Jan and I have been married. I have been proud of each and every one of you as you've entered your careers, married and made your place in the world. Now, our youngest child, not yet twenty-one years old, is well on his way to adulthood."

Lynn blushed as Don's father made his speech. In the few weeks before his graduation, Lynn had finally convinced Don to let go of his concerns about commitment and give her the physical relationship for which she had been begging him. His father's speech was obviously a prelude to a major announcement and she readied herself for the possibility that Don would be popping the question to her in front of his entire family. She would have preferred a more private venue, but she realized that, in his eyes, this was probably a perfect time.

"He has graduated from the Academy as a first lieutenant and is not only transferring to the USSC pilot training program, but also plans on committing himself to a life-long journey. Don?" The colonel sat down, took his wife's hand in his, and pulled his handkerchief from his pocket. She would need it.

Lynn placed her hand on Don's thigh and squeezed before he stood up to make his announcement. He looked around the table at his brothers, sisters, in-laws, nieces and nephews and realized that, if he followed through on his plan and was chosen, he would never see them grow up and grow old. Then his eyes settled on his mother and father. He wondered how he could do this to his mother, but that didn't change his mind. Something in his gut told him that this was the right thing to do.

"You all know that becoming a pilot has been my dream since I played with my first rocket. I don't just want to fly airplanes; I want to fly into space. Watching the Jupiter flight explode in space solidified another thought. I've decided…" he looked directly at his mother to gauge her reaction, "to volunteer for the colonization mission program."

His mother's face turned ashen and then the tears flowed. He went over to her and she stood and hugged him. "I'm sorry, mom," he whispered in her ear. She held his face between her hands and she shook her head. "There's nothing to be sorry for, Don. I always knew you were destined for great things." His siblings gathered around him and offered their congratulations, some with tears, some with awe, and some with sad laughter.

Lynn sat frozen in her chair. It seemed as if everyone was moving in slow motion and she was drowning. She loved him. She couldn't let him leave her to fly to the other side of the galaxy, never to return. What was he thinking?

She finally stood and made her way outside. She was confused and lightheaded. The fresh air hit her face, cooling her, but did nothing to ease her mind. A woman followed her out and asked her if she was alright. She recognized the woman as Don's oldest sister. What was her name? Jan? Joan? June? That was it.

"Uh, yes, I'm fine… Thank you," Lynn replied.

"I'm sorry, Lynn. I can see that you were just as surprised by his announcement as the rest of us. You were expecting him to say something else, weren't you," June stated.

"No, I wasn't," she lied. "I just had no idea… I didn't know…"

"You're in love with him, aren't you?"

Lynn didn't respond, but she didn't have to, it was obvious to everyone except Don.

"Don has always been quite a dreamer, but this one beats them all," June said. "My advice to you is to cut your losses and run. Once Don makes up his mind, it takes an act of congress to change it."

Summer stock was nearly over. Their last production was Rogers and Hammerstein's Carousel, and Judy had the lead. Her experience with Eddie had made her more cautious with men, however, and she kept her stage relationships strictly professional. Her summer had been marvelous in her eyes, and she made what she thought was a firm decision.

"Judy, how can you give this all up to go back to Houston?" Joan asked.

"I'll think of it as going back to high school. I'll earn my diploma this year," Judy answered.

"I wish you would finish school here with us."

"No, I need to be with my family as long as I can, Joan. I've made a decision."

"What is it?"

"I'm not going with them."

Joan hugged her and exclaimed, "Oh, I'm so glad! Do they know?"

"You're the only one who knows. Please don't tell Aunt Colleen because she'll just call my mother right away. My parents need to hear it from me, but I'm not sure I'm ready to tell them yet."

"What are you going to do after you're done school?"

"I'm coming back here for summer stock again. Joan, I love being on stage. I want to become an actress. I'm going to apply to USC and study theater."

"Judy, I know you've made the right decision."

"I hope my parents agree with you."