Disclaimer: Do not own McFly sexualities sadly and all of this is not true.
A/N: Kay so here's another chapter because I felt bad for procrastinating so much!
Thirteen
Dougie died by cheese. AHAHAHA, no he didn't. Instead we had a very jealous and insane James Bourne with an axe, but he had no clue what he was doing so it was alright. Dougie finally came out and then James came running at us with an axe and managed to run into the wall and knock himself unconscious! Apparently he was in love with Dougie, which would explain some things, and came to get him or something…no one takes MY Dougie-poo! I called the police like any normal person would and we all went down to testify that he was in fact a crazy maniac who needs to be locked up for good…or at least until he gets his mind right. Danny got very hysterical about the whole mess, something about him having a nightmare where James killed us all or something…poor Dan. Anyway it's early in the morning and I know Tom and Danny are asleep but I don't think Dougie is, let's get online shall we? OH LOOK LITTLE DOUGIE IS ON; LET'S PRETEND TO BE A TEENIE NOW.
Pete's Da Man:
Hello Helen!
HELENONGTEENIE!!!!11:
OMG PETEERRR!!!!!111ELEVENTYONEONEONE (I know, I'm good yeah?)
Pete's Da Man:
Yes , nice to see you too. Now I have a dilemma that you could help me with.
HELENONGTEENIE!!!!11:
WOT IZ IT?!?
Pete's Da Man:
I'm in love with my best friend and I don't know if they even care about me that way! (OF COURSE I DO YOU IDIOT!)
HELENONGTEENIE!!!11:
I BET HE DOEZ PETE! PMSL
Pete's Da Man
Wait, how do you know it's a guy?
HELENONGTEENIE!!!11:
U SED U WUR GAY DIDN'T U?
Pete's Da Man:
Don't remember that, but alright. I'm going to go and see what time it is and what my friends are up too, thanks for your help Helen
He then signed off; oh crap did I just give myself away? I hope I didn't…I mean it's this or walking around with a big sign on my forehead saying I'M GAY AND IN LOVE WITH DOUGIE POYNTER which would be really weird if you ask me…might mess up my gorgeous hair! I think I'm going to read for a little while, you just sit tight notebook.
Dougie made noise in the hallway in like an hour into my reading, it had just gotten to the good part too where Haraldo confesses his love for Dougita…kidding! But he really did come down the hallway with journal in hand, actually he's writing in it right now. We went and saw that Danny and Tom we're sleeping in each other's arms and now I'm having fun writing in Dougie's journal. Apparently he's going to be emo with the toaster James killed and do other things…I bet he's actually going to go wank off to all his porn!
I take that offensively! –Dougie
Hey just cause I write in your book doesn't give you right to write in mine!
LIES, LIES, LIES! YOU'RE THE REASON I'M EMO AREN'T YOU? –Dougie
Dougie's now huffed off to his room, I hope he remembers to eat this time…oh closet time!
Fourteen
So Dougie couldn't stay in his room all night and day after dinner and everything so early this morning I burst into his room screaming that Tom was pregnant, good and somewhat believable. It was hilarious! He started freaking out until he realized it was a joke and men couldn't have babies…I think me and Dougie need to have THE talk about the birds and the bees again… Dougie then decided to attack me, the master of taking people down, with a pillow and it ended up with us in a compromising position when the door opened.
"Oh good Harry, you finally told him then?" Tom said poking his head in and holding a loaf of bread and some eggs. I HATE YOU TOM FLETCHER, DIE! DIE, DIE, DIE!!!! I NEED A CLOSET, SOMEONE FIND ME A CLOSET!! CAN'T BREATHE, ROOM GETTING TINY!!!
"What?" Dougie asked in confusion as I turned bright red and shoved Tom out of the room and close the door.
"Did Tom just have bread and eggs at 2 in the morning?" I said, my nervous giggle getting the best of me, "That nutter!"
"Well sometimes Danny gets the craving for French toast a la Tom Fletcher really early in the morning and Tom knows that if he complies with Danny's demands he will get some boom boom in return." Dougie explained and rolled his eyes, "What didn't you tell me?"
"ThatI'mtheteenieyou'vebeentalkingtoonline." I said in one big breath in a high squeaky voice while looking down at the floor. This floor is a bit dusty…we should clean it or something really…
"You're the what?" Dougie asked confused, "Say it slower."
"I'm the teenie you've been talking to online." I said, knowing I was glowing like a tomato, "Now excuse me while I go jump off the roof." I started to open the door and decided to do the Dougie Suicide Maneuver when someone grabbed my arm.
"Don't go."
"What? Why not?" I replied feeling his body warmth as it connected to mine.
"Because, I don't care that you posed as a teenie…which why did you anyway?"
"I wanted to know what was going on inside your head Doug, and I knew you posed as a guy named Pete online so I went through with the plan and well uh," I said and coughed a bit to avoid finishing the sentence.
"Then you know my secret."
"Well I already knew because you told all of the viewers of that show we were on yesterday!"
"Sorry bout that, I just…Harry Judd, you make me go insane." Dougie admitted and looked up at me with those wide blue eyes.
"Crazy like the song by Britney Spears?"I said smirking.
"THIS IS NOT THE TIME TO BRING HER UP!" Dougie replied with a glare, "You know how objective I am to her methods!"
"So dancing around like a slut is a method now is it?" I wondered and laughed.
"Only when she does it, anyway that's why I locked myself in my room obviously." Dougie said going back to the original conversation, "Because I was afraid of what you would do."
"Oh Doug," I said shaking my head and sitting down on the floor against the door frame. Doug sat down next to me and looked like a little child. "You are sucha dumbass."
"WHAT?" Dougie almost shouted, like he had been expecting something else. So innocent…
"This whole emo thing, which you can't do because emos don't smile, and the locking up in the room is because you're in love with me?" I said curiously and remembered what Danny told me, "And the jumping off the roof?"
"Yep," Dougie replied with a nod and curled into a bit of a ball.
"Dumbass," I commented and laughed, "You already had my attention."
"What?"
"Dougie, don't you get it or are you as thick as Danny?"
"What do you mean?" Dougie asked with that confused look he gets when he doesn't get anything you've just said.
"I'm in love with you." I said rolling my eyes and smiling, "I tried to say that before James came at us with an ax…that nutter…" Finally I had said it, the words I had wanted to say for a while now…oh great Dougie's dancing…he's not going to end up like James is he?
Fifteen
I think for once I'm so happy that I'm not actually being vain really, or going into the closet! HOORAY FOR HARRY! I'm clapping for myself. So right now Dougie's downstairs talking to Tom and Danny I think and I just had to write some of this down. See last night after I told Dougie I loved him we kind of were getting it on when Danny walked in and started beating us with my cricket bat. HOW DID HE GET MY CRICKET BAT?! I bet he's the one nicking my things…evil Boltoner…Anyway I took the bat and Dougie spent the day with me and then slept next to me that night. He is so bloody cute in the morning with his hair all over the place and everything!! JUST MAKES ME WANNA GET UP AND DANCE YOU KNOW? I bet you don't because you don't have legs notebook…or arms for that matter. Time to head downstairs! Dougie's eating a banana…
"God that's hot." I said and slipped my hands around the younger boy's waist and nuzzled against his neck.
"Hi there Harry!"
"Did you guys give Dougie happy pills again?" I commented looking at Tom and Danny, this had happened before and Dougie was high the whole day.
"THAT WAS ONE TIME AND NO ONE CAN SEEM TO LET IT GO!" Tom said throwing his arms in the air as he let go of Danny's hand and then proceeded to turn on the television, "LOOK! IT'S MINISTRY OF MAYHEM!" Name that Tone came on and Tom and Dougie decided to dance to Mr. Lee's theme song… and if I didn't love Doug or if Tom wasn't one of my best friends I would have been embarrassed.
"That Mr. Lee, he's sucha nice person!" Dougie said smiling as I cuddled against him; he was like the perfect pillow like ever. I love the smell of Dougie in the morning!
"Oh, phones ringin!" Danny called as he finished up his cereal. Tom rushed over and picked up the phone and made short answers until he hung it up.
"Apparently James broke out again and has found Matt along the way…" Tom said looking at us, "This might not be good."
"Wait as in Matt who went off and got drunk because of the break up Matt?" I asked confused. These idiots also wanted to dress as woman with him for a costume party!
"CRAP STICKS! WE'RE ALL GONNA DIEEEEEE! I JUST GOT MY LOVE AND NOW JAMES IS GOING TO MOLEST ME AND I'LL NEVER HAVE CHILDREN!" Dougie shouted and pretended to cry.
"Doug, you're gay and there's always adoption." Tom pointed out.
"Oh right, well you never know." Dougie said cooling down, "Read this brilliant story the other day online where you and I had a baby that was actually Harry's!"
"Wait, you and I had a baby…but it was actually Harry's?"
"Yes, because of this night in Mexico! It was one of the funniest stories ever!"
"I was pregnant?!" Tom said, not really comprehending this all, "How come I wasn't with Dan?"
"I don't know, Danny was with Harry." Dougie explain, this was sick and twisted I think personally, "Duh." Then Danny and I looked at each other and started screaming. "Did I say something wrong?"
"Dougie, I think we should let this one go now alright?" Tom said with an uneasy look, "I just hope to god I never get pregnant!" Oh great so now Tom was worried he was pregnant with MY child, Danny was freaking out, and Dougie was just plain confused…just another day at the McFly house right?