Thanks for the feed back. I'm glad that most of you seem to be enjoying this. I just had a few days away and spent some of the time getting the plans for this story pretty well complete in my mind - I just need to find the time now to get the ideas down. I'll try not to take so long next time. Enjoy!

Title: Losing It

Rating: PG13

Beta: None. All the mistakes are mine!
Disclaimer: I don't own The OC, Ryan or Benjamin McKenzie. (Unfortunately.)

Story: AU. Marissa and Ryan meet for the first time at college. Ryan's background is pretty much as per the show. Marissa's background you need to read chapter 2 to find out.

Chapter 3

Meanwhile, as Marissa sat at her desk trying to stop thinking about her conversation with Molly and the guy with the blue eyes … Ryan and get her mind back on to her assignment, in another apartment, just off campus, an interesting byplay was taking part.

"Tell me again why you aren't coming man?" Luke asked Ryan perplexed.

"Luke!" Ryan exclaimed starting to get frustrated. "It's not like I actually play water polo. Why do you need me to come along to watch anyhow?" Ryan asked.

"Because you always come." Luke replied simply. "And then when the games over, we go and have a few beers with the boys. It's what we always do." Luke added. He looked forward to this every week and he didn't see why it should change. "It won't be the same without you."

Luke's last statement took all the anger out of Ryan and he couldn't help but laugh. "Awww. That's touching. You'll miss me." Ryan teased. "You know, you'd better not say that in front of the guys or they'll think that you have inherited more than your Dad's good looks."

"Shut up." Luke said. Ryan was one of the few people that could rag him about his father's sexual orientation and still have their teeth intact. "You're just jealous because Sarah said she'd come out with me on Friday night." Luke replied.

"I told you I'm not interested in Sarah. She's all yours." Ryan explained.

"Why? What's wrong with her?" Luke asked, suspecting that Ryan had some inside knowledge.

"Nothing." Ryan assured him. "I'm sure she's great. She's just not my type."

"And what exactly is your type? I'd love to know. You seem to have tried out quite a few and yet you still can't settle on any one."

"I promise when I find out, I'll let you know." Ryan said, thinking about a certain young lady and wishing that Luke would just get going and leave him to put his plan in to action.

"Hmmm. I'm not so sure that you will. You'd be too scared that she'd prefer me to you." Luke teased.

"That's it." Ryan agreed facetiously. "I'm quaking in my boots." Ryan replied teasing his friend. "Now … don't you need to get going?"

"Yeah." Luke said looking at his watch. "Are you sure that you don't want to come with?" he asked again, still not prepared to give up easily.

"I'm sure. I've got some things that I have to do." Ryan explained cryptically looking up from his desk where he had spread some books out in front of him hoping that Luke would take the hint. He didn't want to lie to his friend but he also didn't want to tell him what he had planned.

"Don't you dare try to tell me that you have to study?" Luke commented. "You haven't needed to study since you got here and you're still acing all of your courses. I'm the one that's barely scrapping by."

"I've just hit a bit of a problem that I need to sort out." Ryan responded looking up from the books and thinking that it was literally the truth. Normally he didn't have to study. As long as he concentrated in lectures, it seemed that the stuff just stuck in his brain. Ever since he'd started Architecture, it just seemed that it all made sense to him.

But today he hadn't been able to concentrate at all. He'd even sat in a physics class where they were attempting a structural analysis of a single span bridge and somehow or other all his support pylons ended up looking like legs and he knew exactly whose legs they were. If there had ever been any doubt, he knew then, that he needed to do something to get himself out of the funk that she seemed to have him in, otherwise he'd be flunking classes along with Luke.

"Okay." Luke said resignedly. "I guess I'd better get going then. Will you meet us for drinks after the game?" Luke asked, still not happy with this change of routine.

"I'll see how I go." Ryan replied, knowing that he was hoping to be otherwise occupied. "But if I'm not there, start without me."

---

As soon as Luke was out the door, Ryan sprang into action. He quickly changed and grabbed his gym bag and flew out the door. He'd reasoned that as Molly was always there when he and Luke went to the gym on Mondays and Wednesdays, then the mystery girl must have been the normal Tuesday, Thursday girl filling in for her. And that being the case, it seemed that all of a sudden he felt in the need of another workout. He hadn't wanted to tell Luke because …

He wasn't really sure why.

He knew that Luke would say that it was because Ryan didn't want the competition. But that wasn't it. The fact was that he didn't want it to be a competition. That wasn't the way that he felt at all. There was something different about the girl from last night and he just knew that he needed to see her again and work out just what it was. And he didn't want Luke trying to make a game out of it. She intrigued him: after exchanging only a few words. He couldn't remember any girl ever getting to him like this before.

And he needed to find out why. Just what was it about her that made her so special?

---

Ryan covered the distance to the gym in record time but when he was only a few steps from the door he suddenly froze.

What was he going to say to her?

He'd thought of little else but her for the last 24 hours and yet he had no idea what he should do once he saw her again. He knew that she didn't take Luke's come on lines well … so anything like that was out of the question … which was just as well because Ryan didn't have any lines like that. Come to think of it he didn't have many lines at all. Usually girls seemed to come on to him.

But he knew that wasn't likely to happen this time around. Just his luck, that when he had finally found one that he was interested in, she didn't seem to be interested in him.

Although he was sure that for a moment last night … he hesitated, remembering the look that had passed between them and could almost feel his toes tingle. There had been something there.

But maybe it was all in his imagination ….

The only way he would know for sure was to see her again.

He took another tentative step towards the door knowing that he had to enter. The alternative … for him to turn around and go home or to the water polo … wasn't even worth considering.

He wanted to see her.

He still stood outside the door. His thoughts racing trying to come up with something … surely he could think of something to talk to her about other than the weather?

As if by divine intervention it suddenly started to rain lightly and Ryan looked up and smiled. He wasn't exactly a big believer in the power up above but who was he to look a gift horse in the mouth? At this point he'd take help from anywhere. Figuring that this was a sign he laughed to himself and took a deep breath and quickly covered the rest of the distance to the door trusting that something would come to him.

He opened the door and … was instantly disappointed. He tried to look on the bright side. At least he wasn't going to have to worry about what to say … and he'd be able to find out just who his mystery woman was. Sitting behind the desk was Shannon, a girl that he'd known for a while. She lived with Steve, one of the personal trainers and Ryan knew them both from his time at the gym and socially. They had some mutual friends and he occasionally ran in to them at parties.

Shannon smiled. "Ryan Atwood. I don't often see you here on a Tuesday night?" she frowned as she thought back. "In fact I don't think that I've ever seen you here on a Tuesday before. To what do I owe the honour?" she teased.

"Would you believe that I'm out of shape and decided that I needed to do something about it?" Ryan asked.

Shannon stood up from behind the desk and leaned forward resting her arms on top of the counter and starting at the top of his head, ran her eyes over him from top to toe. The messy blonde hair … the piercing blue eyes. … the strong square jaw … the day old scruff … the perfectly proportioned body which had obviously been spending quite a bit of time at the gym from the looks of it because no one could be that perfect without it and shook her head. She smiled. "Definitely not out of shape. And I'm sure that I could get quite a few girls to agree with me." she laughed as she realised how uncomfortable Ryan was under her scrutiny. "Speaking of which … are you still seeing that blonde from Seattle?"

"Laura? No. Turns out we didn't have much in common." Ryan explained with an easy come, easy go attitude.

Shannon laughed. "So another one bites the dust?"

"I guess." Ryan shrugged. "I'll just have to keep looking."

"Exactly what are you looking for? Does such a girl even exist?" She teased knowing Ryan's reputation. He turned them over pretty quickly.

Ryan instantly pictured the golden haired mystery girl from last night. "I think she does."

"You say that with some conviction? Have you already got someone else lined up?" Shannon asked. Her interest was piqued.

"No." He smiled … but it was a knowing smile and only made Shannon even more interested.

Ryan was trying to work out how he could find out more about the girl from last night without sparking Shannon's interest. He didn't want to be too obvious.

"Do you always work on Tuesday evenings?" he asked casually.

"Yeah. I do Tuesday and Thursdays and Molly does Monday, Wednesday and Friday and Mia does the weekends." She explained.

Ryan frowned. He knew Mia because he occasionally came in on the weekends and that definitely wasn't her last night. "Do you know who was here last night?" he asked trying to feign indifference. "It wasn't Molly." He explained.

"It wasn't?" Shannon frowned momentarily and then shrugged. "I have no idea. If she was sick or something then maybe Kate stayed on from earlier in the day?"

Ryan shook his head. "No. I know Kate and it wasn't her either. There must be someone else." He pushed her to think harder.

Shannon frowned trying to think of who it might have been. "I can't think of anyone else." She said and then she looked at Ryan and realised that this wasn't just a casual enquiry she smiled. "Why the interest?"

He tried to shrug noncommittally.

"Did she do something wrong?" Shannon asked.

"No." Ryan said a little panicked. If she was new then the last thing he meant to do was to get her in trouble. He realised that Shannon was paying him much too much attention and so he tried to appear casual and shrugged his shoulders again. "I just hadn't seen her around here before."

"For a minute there I thought your interest may have been more than professional?" Shannon asked watching Ryan carefully for his reaction.

Ryan was sure that if he didn't move quickly that he'd end up giving himself away. "I'd better get inside and start on this workout." He said swiping his membership card and picking up a towel from the counter. "It's not going to do it by itself." He said as he started to move away.

"Are you coming on Saturday night?" Shannon called to him before he disappeared into the weight's room.

Ryan turned at the door. "What's Saturday night?"

"Steve's birthday bash. At our place." She explained.

"I'll see what my social secretary has planned." Ryan commented thinking that Luke already had them lined up to go somewhere else.

Shannon laughed. "You and your social secretary … where is he anyhow?"

"Water polo." Ryan explained.

She nodded. "Well tell him that he's welcome too!"

---

Ryan pushed himself hard. The sweat was running off him but he still couldn't clear his head. He had no idea how he was going to find her again. He would have to come back again tomorrow night just in case Molly was away again. She had said the she covered for Molly so maybe she'd be there again. But if she wasn't … then he had no idea where to turn. He decided to cut his workout short. His muscles were still fatigued from last night and if he was going to come again tomorrow night then he'd have to take it a bit easier or he'd end up straining something. And it wasn't as if he'd actually wanted a work out in the first place. It had only been an excuse to try to see her again.

He contemplated asking Shannon to make some enquires for him about the mystery girl but he knew that it would be obvious then that he had a thing for her. And how could he have a thing for someone that he'd barely said two words to?

But he knew he did.

He couldn't get her out of his mind and so as he prepared to leave he swallowed his pride and went back to the front desk.

"All done?" Shannon asked. "That wasn't long." She remarked.

Ryan was a little embarrassed as he realised that she may very well catch him out. "I'm going for intensity not endurance." He explained hoping that she would believe him.

Shannon frowned but nodded accepting his words with reservation. Something didn't quite ring true? Add to that the fact that Ryan was standing shuffling from one foot to the other obviously uncomfortable and wanting to say something but unsure of how to start and she decided that her suspicions from earlier where correct. He was interested in the mystery woman.

"Um." He started.

Shannon smiled. This would be fun. She'd never known Ryan to behave like this before. Now she wanted to know who the girl was as well.

"Um … what?" Shannon asked innocently.

"I was just … I was just wondering if you have any way of finding out who was working last night?" he finally got out.

"You do like her, don't you?" Shannon asked smiling at his discomfit.

"I barely know her." Ryan explained.

"But you'd like to?" Shannon teased.

"Maybe." Ryan admitted and shrugged. "I don't know … "

Shannon watched him for a moment. Could this really be one of the studs of the campus going all shy over a mystery girl?

But she liked Ryan and she decided to take pity on the poor guy. "Give me a second and I'll call Steve. He was working last night so he might know who it was." She explained. "He worked today but he left a short while ago. I'll try him at home."

Ryan thanked her and waited impatiently while she made the call.

When she'd finished with the call she looked up at him. "Well I can't tell you much. Apparently Molly has the week off because she had to go home for something and she got a friend of hers to cover. It's not much but it's all I can help you with. I'm guessing that she'll be back again tomorrow night." Shannon said.

Ryan took in the information as if it was food to a starving man. He smiled as the realisation set in. She'd be back again tomorrow. Now he just had to get through the next 24 hours. He thanked Shannon and then turned to make his way out the door when she stopped him with her voice.

"Oh yeah. And her name's Marissa." She added.

Ryan's face broke into a huge grin. Marissa … she had a name. He couldn't wait to see her again.