As soon as Jayne was out of earshot, Kaylee scooted over to where River had sat down. She sat cross-legged next to her, beaming. "Well?" she demanded. "Details! Now!"
River looked at her strangely. "You won't tell Simon?" she asked, her voice cautious. Kaylee shook her head.
"Not a peep." She replied, miming zipping her lips shut. River sighed.
"I've been…dreaming, for weeks. At first, there was no face, but then, the man that was making love to me turned to Jayne." She paused, looking over at Kaylee, who was hanging onto her every word. "At firsts, I thought I would get over it, but it's been over a month, and he's still there, in my head, in my heart, inside me, all the time."
"Wow…" Kaylee breathed. "Did he kiss you?"
"No," River answered. Kaylee looked heartbroken. "I kissed him." The mechanic grinned, raising her eyebrows in a request for more details. "And then he kissed me back. Hard."
"Wow…"
"Yea."
"Do you love him? Kaylee asked. River jumped. She looked at Kaylee, her eyes wide.
"I barely know him," she protested. Kaylee stayed silent. River looked at the ground. "I just…I dunno. Maybe I've got no idea how to love someone." She admitted.
"You'll figure it out." Kaylee promised.
---
Jayne was pissed. He was angry at River, for making him crazy, angry at himself, for letting his control slip, and he was angry at Kaylee, for interrupting what had been the hottest ten minutes of his life. He unloaded cargo with unusual energy, packing them into even larger crates on whatever the hell planet they were on.
He was alone, save for Simon pacing in the corner. Jayne had no idea what with wrong with the doctor, and he really wasn't in the mood to ask.
His blood was still hot; he could still feel the swell of River's breast in his hand. Her lips were sweeter then he had thought they would be, her skin softer. He cursed himself for thinking about her. A new arrival broke him from his thoughts.
"Kaylee!" Simon hurried over to the smirking mechanic. 'Gorramit,' Jayne thought. 'She knows.'
"Simon," Kaylee asked, "Could I talk to Jayne alone for a moment?"
A jealous frown crossed Simon's face. Jayne rolled his eyes. "Don't you worry, doc, I won't sully her honour." Simon, still looking displeased, nodded, and left the room.
"It's not my honour I'm worried about." Kaylee commented, once Simon was gone.
"Gorramit Kaylee! It's none of your damn business!" Jayne said, glaring at the woman.
"Just tell me this," Kaylee insisted. "Tell me you're not just gonna use her an' lose her. I don't thin she could take it!'
"I'm not gonna 'use her' at all!" Jayne cried, fighting to keep his voice down. "She's a teenager! Just a kid!"
"But you like her." Kaylee pointed out.
"I'm a bad man," Jayne replied. "Besides, that's not the issue."
Kaylee glared at him, annoyed. "That's the whole issue, idiot."
"What do you want from me?" Jayne finally asked after a stretch of silence.
"Don't hurt her." Kaylee said. "Promise me."
"Yea, I promise," Jayne replied. He had no intention of ever getting into a situation where River might be hurt. It was better to just stay away from her. Safer, for everybody.
His job done, and Kaylee gone to flirt with Simon some more, Jayne was on his way to his bunk. A good gun cleaning session would take his mind off things. As he climbed into his quarters, he sensed another presence. "Who's there?" he demanded, drawing his gun.
River stepped into view and Jayne sighed in relief. "Don't do that!" he snapped.
River ignored him. "You were going to avoid me, and come down here and toy with your guns some." She looked at Jayne for confirmation. He grunted in response. "I figure," River continued. "Since all your plans exclude me, we should follow mine."
"Is that right?"
"It is."
River stepped towards him slowly, her hands meeting the hard muscles on his chest. Her touch was fire, and Jayne struggled to keep his head.
"River," he began, but was cut off by her kiss.
"Shut up." She ordered, pushing the large man onto his bed easily. She climbed nimbly on top of him, straddling his stomach. At that point, Jayne gave in. His fingers tangled in her hair and he pulled her down over him. Her tongue was leaving a trail of heat along his neck, and her hands were busy unbuttoning his shirt. Her hips hovered over is, the navy dress sliding up to expose her pale thigh. Jayne ran his fingers along the smooth skin, feeling the goose bumps rise.
"You want me, don't you?" River whispered into Jayne's ear. Jayne made a grunt of response. River pulled herself away. "Then prove it." She demanded. She could feel his erection press against her, and she wiggled slightly. A soft growl escaped Jayne's throat and River grinned.
"I'll be in my bunk," she said softly, climbing up off the big man and pulling her dress straight. She climbed up the ladder and left Jayne on his bed, looking completely bewildered, and not just a little frustrated.
River walked Serenity's hallways silently, it was nearing mid-afternoon now. She stepped lightly, listening to the voices of the other crew members. Zoë and Wash were audible from their room, River stood just outside the door, her voyeuristic side taking over.
"I don't see why you're having such a hard time with this!" Zoë wasn't bothering to keep her voice down. River could hear her stomp around the room. Wash was silent, standing still, as far as River could tell. "Answer me!" Zoë demanded.
"What do you want me to say?" Wash asked. "You know how I feel about this, we've talked about it! I'm not saying I'm not pleased cause you know that I am, I just can't help but think that the timing ain't too good."
"What's timing got to do with our baby?"
"Everything!" Wash cried. He too, was not interested in keeping quiet. "I know you like to think you're all invincible, but if you go out on a job, and it goes south…" he trailed off, clearing his throat. "I'm not willing to lose my whole family because you think that everything's shiny."
"I know how to take care of myself." Zoë said quietly, so quietly, that River barely heard her. She definitely heard the sigh from Wash; it was monumental.
"That's my point. It's not just you that you're lookin' after."
River heard footsteps come toward the ladder and quickly got away from the entrance. From behind a corner, she watched Zoë climb from her quarters, looking ready to kill somebody. River watched her leave. Wash did not resurface, and after a few minutes, River thought it safe to go to her bunk.
She and Simon's rooms were empty as usual. Simon would most likely be with Kaylee, in town, picking up supplies for the infirmary. River had no interest in seeing the town, it would mean seeing and fending off the advances of other men. In her current mood, she was not too sure she would fend them off.
She wanted Jayne, badly, but she was unwilling to let him use her just for pleasure. She wanted Jayne Cobb to love her. It sounded near impossible, but anything less was unacceptable. River paced her room. She had hoped Jayne would follow her, but common sense told her this was improbable. His pride would keep him from following a girl who teased him. He liked things to be under his control. He had probably gone to town, to find a more willing girl to entertain him.
River tried to shake this realization from her head, but couldn't. She sat down on her bed, knees curled up to her chest, and tried to keep her body from shaking. She could see it happening, all in her head. Jayne, locked in a passionate embrace with a blonde woman, someone who smiled invitingly when handed a bill. It was all there, playing out in her head. Impossible to deny, it was what he lived for.
She would forget him the instant he was gone, River thought bitterly. Just another job. Just like Jayne had forgotten River, the moment she had left the room. It wounded her to no end.
River sat, shaking, imagining Jayne with another woman for near an hour before a knock on her door broke her trance. She looked up as the door slid open. Jayne Cobb slid into the small space, his bulk enlarged by the confining room.
"Jayne."
River was more than surprised by his presence, all she could muster to say was his name. She didn't move from the bed, nor did she move closer to him when he sat on the edge. "River, you said I was to prove that I wanted you, and I sure as hell ain't sure how to do that, besides bein' here with you." He said this all very fast and then looked as if he hated himself for coming at all.
River smiled. "That is exactly what I wanted." She unfurled herself and climbed over to his side. Trailing fingers down his face, she examined his every feature.
"What're you doin'?" he asked, watching her.
"Remembering."