Chapter 25

Schools back

The Nins were back in school. It had been an awfully weird time for them recently. Their past teachers had been dropping out like flies. Iruka had escaped from his root beer rehab center and was on the run from ANBU for stealing $900 worth of root beer, and Genma had quit because 'he didn't like those damn punks'. The only other class for our group of ninjas that wasn't occupied was the cooking class (taught by Kurenai).

The cooking classroom was set up with the center having desks in the same 4x4 formation, with the edges of the classroom being the actual kitchen parts.

The nins were in the same seats as before, in the front row, starting on the left, was Rock Lee (still in shock, muttering "Red Hair…….Red Hair"), Sakura (who was trying to get Lees attention, but failing), Haku (who was listening to the CD of 'RENT'), and Kimimaru (using one of his bones to carve into his desk). In the second row, was Gaara (still drawing chibi Yaoi), Choji (eating his desk, again), Kiba, and Tenten (reading a Hentai). In the 3rd row, was Temari (still has Shika on the short leash), Shika (crying), Shino, and Ino. In the last row, was Kankuro, Naruto (shouting Dattebayo) and a new student, a guy with pink hair and a pink outift.

The door suddenly opened, and Kurenai walked in the room. As soon as she did, the new kid in the class suddenly yelled "hey! Hot Momma, take it off hunnie!"

"Morning students" said Kurenai, not hearing Him "welcome to intro to cooking, now I know some of you have experience in this subject" she said looking a Temari "and might have an advantage over others"

"Yeah right" mumbled Shika

Yup, everyone saw what happened next.

ZAP!

"AAAAAAA!"

As Shika shook with Pain from his collar thingie, kurenai scanned the class.

"Oh, yes children, we have a new student" she said, looking at her list "would a mister, Zelos Wilder come up here?"

The Guy in the back with pink hair got up and strutted to the front of the class, pinching Tenten in the hiney as he did. He got to the front of the class, and introduced himself.

"Yo Losers! I'm Zelos, I'm the foxiest and Hotest mother f--ker you've ever seen. I'm a Magic swordsman, Casanova, and gigalo. I'm the gift to ladies man ever, and I'm looking for some new hunnies. For all you ladies, I'll call you, and to all you guys, go F--k yourselves"

"You" he said, pointing to Tenten "can be hot funny looking girl"

"You" he continued, pointing to Sakura "can be my love lotus"

"You" he said, pointing to Ino, "can be the ugly one"

"You" he said, pointing to Temari "can be the insane chic"

"And you" he said, pointing to Haku "can be my wuv hunnie"

"I'm a guy" said Haku

"Oh, that was a close one" Zelos thought to himself

"Thank you Zelos, you may sit down"

Zelos strutted back to his desk, every guy in the class was pissed off (for good reason), while all the girls blushed and giggled. On his way back, Kiba tried to trip him, and Zelos saw through it and countered by slamming his face into his desk.

"Don't mess with me"

The moogle on Kibas head gave Zelos the finger as he walked away.

In the front row, Kimimaru whispered to Haku

"You know, for a guy who wears pink, he's pretty tough"

Haku eyes were focused on Zeloses butt. "he is soo hot"

Kimimaru scooted his desk away from Haku.

It was later, and all the ninjas were at their kitchen stations around the room. They were instructed by Kurenai to cook a Chicken. She had given them instructions so easy, a moron could figure it out, and, as she expected, they were having problems.

In lab # 4, Naruto was paired with Kiba, and they're were having problems. Since Kiba loves animals so much, he's a vegetarian. Asking a vegetarian to cook a chicken is not a good idea.

"For the love of dattebayo, just help me baste the thing!"

Kiba was holding the chicken, shaking it, like he was hoping it would come back to life.

"Come on, little buddy, you can pull through! Come on! You can do it!"

"Put the damndattebayo chicken down" Naruto yelled, trying to wrestle it away from Kiba

Naruto and Kiba started to wrestle over the chicken on the ground, Haku, who was paired up with Kankuro, thought this was rather exciting.

"Ooo, ahhh, hehe" Haku said as he fanned himself "I wish I had bought my camera"

Kankuro had finished preparing his Chicken, but he had the sudden urge to shove his hand up the turkeys butt and do a ventriloquist act. He looked left, no one, he looked right, no one was watching. Kankuro started to reach his hand for his chickens butt, suddenly…

"Don't even think about it" Kurenai said, grabbing the chicken away from Kankuro.

In the back of the room, Rock Lee and Sakura were working together. Rock Lee was twitchy and nervous, always ducking whenever Gaara looked in his direction. Sakura was rather bugged by this, Lee was acting all weird and strange, something happened, and he wouldn't say. She wanted to get the bottom of this, but how to do that?

"uh, Lee, could you help me baste the chicken?"

"AAA!" Lee spazed and roundhoused the chicken, sending it sailing into the back of Ino's head. Upon getting hit, Ino fell face first into the grease bucket. As usual, no one cared.

"Uh, Lee, are you alright?"

"Sakura, hehehe, not Gaara person, I'm fine, fine, fine fine, super fine"

"uh, okayyyyyy" said Sakura, realizing how messed up Lee was

"red hair, red hair………." He said, spazing

"excuse me, Students?" Said Kurenai out loud

Everyone was too busy to pay attention. When Ino had her head stuck in the grease bucket, Zelos threw a match in there, setting Ino's head on fire. Everyone was busy watching Ino run around on fire than to listen to Kurenai.

Kurenai pushed Ino into the trash, and got the classes attention again.

"Oh, and students, I have an announcement, tomorrow night, your students are going to be putting on a play for all of Konaha"

The students all groaned.

Shikamaru raised his hand to ask question

"whos directing the play?"

Suddenly, Temari (Shikas cooking partner) got pissed off.

"WHO GAVE YOU PERMISSON TO SPEAK?" she said as she shocked him

"anyway" Kurenai continued, ignoring Shika shaking violently on the ground "the play will be directed by Kakashi, and I'm not sure what play your going to perform"

"Sounds friggen stupid" Yelled Zelos, in the 3rd kitchen station "can we just bribe our ways out of this?"

"No"

"Shit"

"A play?" Thought Gaara "this might be my perfect opportunity to, hehe, perform with my wuv muffin"

Suddenly, something caught the attention of everyone in the class. Everyone turned around, and outside, Jiraya was tapping on the glass.

"what are you doing Jiraya?" asked Kurenai, annoyed that her class was interrupted

"oh, don't worry, I wont stay for long, just one thing I have to say"

Jiraya promptly turned around, pulled down his pants, and started to press his 50-year-old butt against the window.

Needless to say, the class was horrified.

Yup, thats right, Zelos Wilder is now part of the story. For those who who havent played Tales of Symphonia, Zelos was one of the playable characters. He was the chosen of Tetehalla (no idea how to spell that), he was basically as he appeared here, an arrogant, overconfident, Ladies Man. I put him in because I thought he'd fit right in with the gang from Naruto pretty well. But our story already has one ladies man, is there enough for two? (cue foreshadowing Music)

Also, yes, in the future, the nins put on a play, and yes, nins screw up, people get hurt, and yes, Gaara plots yet another plan. I've gotta say, on a side note, Yaoi is hard to write. It just keeps getting harder and harder to top the stuff Gaara plots. I'm also starting to feel sorry for Lee, seriously, I feel guilty writing all this stuff to him. The person I feel worse for is Shika, seriously, in the manga, Temari had Shikamaru whipped, in my story, i took it a step further.

Anyway, until next time, everytime a yaoi is written, a puppy dies, an angel looses its wings, and an extra week of school is added to the semester (NOOOOO!)