A Sardonic Liaison
30 Drabbles for Grimmjow and Ichigo
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Chapter Title: Exposed
Author: gogodgene (Away From Sanity)
Pairing: Grimmjow x Ichigo (Isshin x Ryuuken kind of)
Fandom: Bleach
Theme: #2, "news; letter"
Rating: PG-13 Cursing, suggestive themes
Disclaimer: I don't own anything. If I did, I wouldn't be writing fanfiction. Alas, everything belongs to Kubo Tite.
Notes: OHMIGOSH, guys. Two updates back to back. I spoil you.
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Sunday.
It was a day that Ichigo had come to love.
Not only was school out, but most Sundays he got to lounge around in his bed with a warm body next to him. This warm body being none other than one Grimmjow Jaggerjack. And, as to add more reason to love Sundays, his family was gone most of the day. So, this of course meant precious alone time with the Sexta Espada. Alone time was important when he hadn't been laid all week.
But, for now, he was extremely hungry and needed to get out of bed. The only problem with this great idea was that said warm body was currently sprawled out over him.
All over him.
This would've been a turn-on in any other situation.
"Grimm." 99 percent of the time, saying his name would never wake the bear from his slumber. "Grimmjow." No response. "Jaggerjack." It never hurts to try.
Of course, when trying falls through, you can always elbow someone in the ribs. The faint snoring that Kurosaki had heard before disappeared, a string of curses taking their place.
"Dammit, Ichi. That hurt a little," said the groggy voice next to the Shinigami.
"Get up, retard. I'm hungry and you're fat ass is keeping me away from the kitchen." Grimmjow clicked his tongue, turning over to lay by the window, and burrowing in the teenager's blanket. It wasn't his fault that he was almost sleeping on top of Ichigo. The kid only had a twin-sized mattress for God's sake; they could barely fit together most nights.
"At least I'm not complainin' about hunger, lard-o." Ichigo glared at the back of Jaggerjack's held, elbowing him in the spine for good measure. Grimmjow turned his head to give the kid a menacing glare, but it came up short and just looked grumpy. "Would you freakin' stop with the elbows? Jeez! You're too bony to be elbowing me!" The substitute shinigami stood, pulling on his boxers that had been tossed aside last night. Not like he cared, he was the one who had made the first moves.
"I thought you just said I was fat," he replied, pulling on a t-shirt. Grimmjow rolled back over, sighing in annoyance.
"Whatever. You're a fuckin' stick."
"And you aren't?"
"At least I have some muscle tone," the Espada continued, ending with a yawn.
"We have the same body type, you asshole."
"Nah. My cock's bigger."
"Prick," and with that, Ichigo slammed his bedroom door. Grimmjow smiled to himself, eyes still closed; another battle well won.
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The Sexta Espada finally made it downstairs about a half hour later. He was kind of tired, but lacking warmth on one side of the bed had been a mood killer and forced to get up. Ichigo saw the blue-haired hollow out of the corner of his eye come in and was surprised the ass had enough decency to throw his pants on. Last time he had walked around naked, which had caused them to argue for a while.
Of course, just after that, they had defiled the kitchen table.
Kurosaki called it a vicious cycle.
Grimmjow called it being adventurous.
The Espada sniffed the air, watching as the Vaizard worked over the stove cooking something. Jaggerjack had always wished that the idiot would stop cooking around him; it made him jealous. He would never voice his opinion though, because then he would look like a pussy.
Or be made fun of.
So, instead, he tried to focus on the wooden table he was currently seated at, but he had a short attention-span so it didn't work. He looked around the table to survey the few objects that were on it; a newpaper, a coffee mug from this morning, a letter to Ichigo.
Wait.
Jaggerjack snatched the letter up, unfolding it to look for the writer's name. Ichigo finally sat down with his plate full of scrambled eggs, bacon, and toast, almost going for the first bite, but distracted by what Grimmjow held.
"What's that?"
"It's a letter."
"Hey, man, don't be reading my family's stuff."
"It's not theirs. It's to you." Ichigo quickly grabbed the letter away from Grimmjow's otherwise iron grip, and skimmed over it. He didn't touch his food.
"Does your dad always sound like that?" Jaggerjack questioned. The shinigami didn't answer, reading the letter in embarassed horror.
To my lovely son Ichigo,
Your sisters have been complaining about the noise coming from your room lately. I know teeanger's don't have a lot of control, but it would be greatly appreciated if you could quiet down. I've been hearing it lately, too, and I sleep downstairs. Daddy think it's okay that you have a special friend, but you two really are too loud.
Ichigo heard his plate slide across the table, and didn't care. He glanced at Grimmjow and knew he wasn't going to eat due to obvious reasons.
Why I remember my college days. These were before I met your mother, of course, but I also had a special friend. He was quite the shy one, but he was sure loud in bed.
If the orange-haired teen had eaten anything yet, it would've been on the floor by now. He vaguely saw Grimmjow out of the corner of his eye playing with his food, looking at the fork, and getting the glimer in his eyes that meant he was about to do something mischievious.
Okay, so vaguely wasn't the right word, but he still didn't care.
You would probably know him if you saw him. He looks a lot like that friend of yours with the glasses. I think that's his son. Anywho, we'd get urges too every once in awhile: especially when we had knocked back too many. But we learned to keep ourselves under control because it isn't classy to be moaning wantonly into the wee hours of the morning.
"Ichigo, look at this. This is hilarious."
Of course, it was learn to control ourselves or be kicked out of the dorm.
"Hey, look!"
You should've seen his face. It was hilarious. In hind-sight I probably shouldn't have joked about it. I didn't get laid for a month.
"You're not lookin'!"
That's pretty bad for a college kid. Especially for me. He was pretty talented, so it made it all the worse.
"Ichigo." Was Jaggerjack over there whining or was it just Ichigo's nerves?
Anyway, main point, learn to be quiet from now on or you'll have to find some place else to get nookie.
His father DID NOT just write that.
Try not to wreck the furniture (you know what I mean),
Your loving father
P.S. Is your friend apart of a gang or something? I don't think you should be sleeping with people who've had tattoos. And that hair! It's weirder than yours. I trust your judgement, though, so introduce me sometime.
"Ichi! Look!"
"What! What! What IS IT Grimmjow?!" The shinigami turned his eyes to the arrancar who picked up the fork with a smirk, and swallowed. Ichigo quirked an eyebrow and watched as the Espada stood up. The two waited a couple moments before saw something fall out of the whole that was his stomach in another life.
There was silence, while Jaggerjack just grinned like a madman.
There was more silence.
Ichigo couldn't handle all this weirdness.
"Dude. Gross."
"Aw, c'mon, it's funny!" Ichigo waved him off, still in shock about the letter.
"It probably would've been funny if I didn't just read the most embarassing letter of my entire life."
"Oh yeah. That was pretty bad. I didn't know 'ur dad was gay."
"He's not gay!"
"Bi. Whatever the fuck. He's weird though."
"I can't believe they've all heard us! Oh my God, my sisters must be traumatized." Ichigo's forehead promptly met the tabletop. Jaggerjack sat back down, chuckling a little.
"They'd learn about it sooner or later, Ichi."
"I was hoping later. Did you see that he caught us in bed together?"
"Oh really. Hmm. Never noticed." There was silence as Ichigo wallowed in embarassment on the table, while Grimmjow tried to keep that taste of the scrambled eggs in his memory. They weren't half-bad, considering Kurosaki cooked them. He didn't know the kid could cook.
Then, everything stood still. Both persons at the table promptly looked at each in surprise at the same time.
"Wait."
"Wait." They both said.
"If he could see you--," Ichigo started.
"Then that means--."
"Oh shit."
"Oh shit."
