Sitting in the dark always helped me to think. I trekked north, through the Forest of Nowhere. It was one of the worst, godforsaken places in the world.
I had broken through the last of dead trees and was finally out of the forest. The rocky mountain had been eroded by magic into a looming palace, shaped like the face of a gigantic beast. The entrance was a yawning mouth, its entrance always lit by flaming torches. Ever since I had entered the Forest, the sky was perpetually overcast, but it looked like this place had never seen the light of day.
I found a cave hidden by a few straggly bushes under the mountain, crawled in and settled into a lotus position. It was small enough for me to sit in, but not tall enough to stand up.
First things first: Why was I here? I didn't even have an answer to that. The past few days journeying here were all a blur, filled with internal pain, as I was too weak to summon up the previous numb shell that protected me from heartache. And that prevented me from feeling any emotion, whether positive or negative.
Is it better to feel no emotions at all, or to feel, but only pain? a crystal clear voice murmured in my head,
It doesn't matter now! I snapped back, impatient.
Alright, look for him and confront him, a hotheaded part of me said aggressively. Kill him if you have to! Rip of his smug face and grin it to dust. He wasted your time at the temple, where you played the goody-two-shoes like the rest of them. He rejected you, before he even got to know you. You hate him, you know you do!
NO! another voice screamed back. Never, ever... I love him!
You can't kill him, a cool, reasonable voice said. He has never really known the real you. It isn't fair to judge him like that..
To think I wanted him evil..
The argument in my head went like that for a while. Finally, the voice of reason, and - urgh- love won.
Fine, I'll give him a second chance, I snapped to myself. How?
That was when inspiration hit me.