Why Dobby is Lame (a Story of Mockery)
by Songweaver
Disclaimer:I own nothing but my twisted opinions, children! J.K. shall never sue this maniac!
J.K.: Why are you mocking my characters?!?
Me: Because it's fun, blondie! Avada Kadavra! That's for killing Sirius, you sicko!
THIS MAY CONTAIN SPOILERS FROM DEATHLY HALLOWS!!!!!!!! READ AT YOUR OWN RISK!!!!!! THANK YOU!
A/N: anything in ' ' is an action...
Rita Skeeter:
1. She wears ugly glasses! Seriously, has she ever HEARD of a mirror?
2. I bet she doesn't even NEED to wear glasses! People that only wear glasses because they think they make them look good are stupid.
3. She probably wears sunglasses inside!
4. She likes sending pus-filled envelopes to bushy-haired hormonal girls!
5. She probably got dirty thoughs from terrorizing said hormonal girl...and thats just nasty... 'hurls on her shoes'
6. And her shoes are covered in vomit!
7. She has a bewitched quill to write her twisted articles! It doesn't even write the truth!
8. She can turn into a beatle (no, she was not in the band)...I bet someone will end up squishing her! Me: 'takes out giant shoe' Here, buggy, buggy, buggy!
9. Her bag is made of animal skin! that is SOOOOO not cool!
10. Her last name is Skeeter for Voldie Moldie's sake! Isn't that a puppet's name?
Okay everyone! Next up is the Weasley Twins! Thank you to everyone that reviewed! I love you guys all eternally! PLEASE REVIEW!
Songweaver