A/N: Let me know if there's any interest to read this story. Otherwise, what's the point in writing?

Authentic Emotions

They say that time changes things, but you actually have to change them yourself - Andy Warhol

Seth Cohen was a lucky man. If he would get the question asked if he needed anything else in life the answer would be no. Things couldn't possibly get any better. He had a great job as a journalist, a great place to stay at, nice friends and the most perfect girlfriend he could ask for. Life was pretty good.

At the age of 27 Seth would never had thought he'd be this guy; this happy normal guy who had the life others dreamed of having. He even looked good and that was something he'd never even dared to wish. His Jewish skin had after twenty years of California sunshine actually started to welcome the sunrays and he wasn't as pale as he'd been and always thought he would stay. And, after being told that girls liked a guy with a little facial hair, Seth had quit using the safety razor as soon as his skin wasn't as soft as a baby's.

The only thing Seth couldn't change, even if he would want to, was his hair. It was still curly, chocolate brown and looked like a child's. But shaving it off had never been an option and as strange as some people thought it was, Seth was very fond it. And therefore it had stayed throughout the years.

"Seth! What's taking you so long?" a female voice yelled and caused him to sit up on the bed, and begin to tie his shoes. He was late, as always, and for a second he'd forgotten about the time when slipping into his thoughts. They were going out for dinner with Ryan and his steady girlfriend of two years, Kate.

The first time Seth had seen Jordan was about a year ago, a Tuesday afternoon at work. She was the new girl; English, tall, stunning, with dark blonde hair reaching her shoulders and a smile that always was as contagious. His first conversation with her had been that Wednesday, he'd by accident managed to spill coffee on her papers. Everything had felt like in one of those chick flicks where love just happened to come by in the cheesiest way. But surprisingly it had worked out very well. Somehow he had throughout the years created some sort of charm that the opposite gender actually liked.

Suddenly a thin woman's body slipped into the room, slowly and graciously walking up to him where he sat on the bed. The silky thick hair was lying on her back straight and he could smell the perfume she always insisted in carrying. "You're not ready yet?" Jordan leaned her head closer to his so that he felt her breath on his neck, tracing her elegant fingers over his jaw.

Every day Seth asked himself the question, several times. What in the world had he done that was so great that he got an amazing girl like this? He couldn't help the grin that appeared on his face as she kissed his cheek, carefully pecking it with her pink lips. "I was just about to come out to you." He knew that it was a lie, as did she, and even if she knew that she continued to kiss his jaw, making her way to his waiting lips. Jordan didn't get irritated that easily and she didn't get mad often, she was mostly just loving and understanding. When thinking about it, Seth had actually never had a big fight with her; only smaller things. They mostly agreed and were able to solve most things. Which was awesome in a relationship according to Seth.

"We should go," she softly said after breaking their kiss.

Trying his best to look as sad he could, hoping to cause the humility in Jordan to make an appearance, Seth took her hand. Intertwining their fingers, lovingly stroking her thumb in that way he knew she liked, he lowered his head and pouted.

"Come on, Seth," she laughed. "We're gonna be late."

Seth gazed into her green eyes, tilting his head. "I don't care." Quickly, and a little clumsy, he crushed his lips onto hers and smiled into her mouth as she responded.

"Yes, you do," she giggled as the kiss ended. "We'll save this," she softly placed a kiss on his nose, "'til tonight."

Looking at her suspiciously he lifted an eyebrow. "Is that a promise?"

The night was unusually warm, the wind soft and delightful. Jordan had a thin cardigan over her shoulders while Seth had the suit jacket over his arm. Their fingers were intertwined as they silently walked through the street, on their way to the restaurant where Ryan and Kate would be waiting.

Seth shot glances to Jordan every other second; discreetly observing his girlfriend's gorgeous looks. She had an elegant walk, leaving perfect space between where she put her feet down and having her shoulders relaxed and still as her arms slightly moved. Everything about her was elegant and tasteful. Maybe that was how people were like in England; maybe the parents taught their children to act like royalties. Kind and respectable royalties. Because Jordan never acted as if she was better than anyone or was one to demand things from others.

She was for certain the most kind and humble person Seth had ever met. Another thing of what she possessed was intelligence; Jordan always spoke with carefully chosen words and always knew the best way of handling a situation or calm an upset reader for the newspaper they worked for. Not that people complained much on her work – readers always seemed to like what she'd written and agree with her opinions – but when they did on for example Seth's. Something about Jordan seemed to always affect everyone in the best ways; her magic never ceased to amaze him.

"Seth," she said and drew him back to reality and the noisy street. "Are you okay?"

He blinked and looked up at her, an embarrassed smile creeping over his lips. "Huh? Yeah, sure. I just got caught up in my thoughts."

"You think a lot." Jordan stated and broke their eye contact, casually gazing into the windows of where they walked.

"I guess. Is that a bad thing," he anxiously asked.

She laughed and grabbed his arm, dragging him with her into the restaurant that they'd obviously reached by now. "No, not at all."

Inside it was quite dark, with lamps on every table and on the walls illuminating the space. Ryan and Kate were already seated next to each other by a round table in the middle of the restaurant.

"Hi," Jordan said and greeted them both by kissing their cheeks. "You haven't been waiting for long, have you?"

"No," they both said at the same time, locking eyes.

Seth sat down in a chair with a sigh. "Blame it all on me." He placed his hand lovingly on Jordan's arm, caressing it and giving her a smile. "She was finished an hour before me, so."

Seth leaned against the black Mercedes, crossing his legs in a relaxed way while gazing up to the star filled sky. Thousands of stars seemed to look down on him, creating the same calm as it always had. The ocean and the beach with all its open space and quietness at night even now, after so many years, had the power to give him that feeling. It was something like a flashback from his childhood; when you had the same feeling but couldn't really explain how it was like and when you didn't really know what it was from. All Seth did know was that he always received the same feeling in his stomach while standing on the beach or watching the stars.

He had a special relation with the sky, the beach and the ocean. He'd never leave that. Years ago his dream had been to go to the east, away from Newport and California. He'd never imagined going anywhere else but to the coast, for his entire life stuck to the dream of heading east. And even if that hadn't happen – for unfortunate incidents – going there would always be something he wanted.

"Seth! Come join us," Jordan yelled from down the beach where she stood barefoot together with Ryan and Kate. They'd been there for a few minutes while Seth had stayed by the car, blaming it on his new shoes which couldn't get sandy or wet.

Jordan waved for him to come enthusiastically though and seeing her by the water, the moon as the only light to illuminate her face as her hair blew in the wind, was enough to make him change his mind. She smiled brightly as he reached her and wrapped his arms around her, pulling her into an embrace.

"Isn't it beautiful at night? No sound but the waves and no light but the moon."

"Yeah," Seth agreed and drew her tighter against him with one arm as he stared out over the ocean. "It's really something."

"We should go here more often," she quietly said and snuggled further into his arms. "Maybe watch the sunset sometime."

Seth slowly nodded against her head and let his eyes fall onto a part of the beach he hadn't visited for a long time. Six years. It was the best place to watch the sunset but he knew that he's never take Jordan there, he'd never set foot there ever again.

"We should head home soon," he said and forced his gaze away from that place.

Jordan questionably tilted her head to look at his face and eyes. "Why?"

"It's getting late." Seth smiled slightly, stroking one hand over her blonde hair. "And besides, I think I remember someone promising we'd do something tonight." A seductive smile spread over his face and he saw how Jordan bowed her head, blushing. Taking her delicate hand in his Seth began to lead her away from the ocean and up to the car.

Jordan stopped after a few meters though. "I should go tell Kate and Ryan." She motioned in their direction, further down by the water. "I'll meet you by the car?"

Seth nodded and let go of her hand, putting both of his in the pockets instead. "Sure."

Jordan placed a soft kiss on his lips as a sample for later and gave him one more of her affectionate smiles before turning around and heading down to where the other couple stood. With a content grin Seth paced back up to his car, feeling slightly relieved that he finally could leave and go home.

As much as Seth felt connected to everything about it, the beach was a part of his past and therefore something that he wanted to keep to himself. He would have to learn to move on from what had happened; after all it was a long time ago and he'd moved on from everything else. And because he'd do that, there was no point in dragging Jordan into it all. He'd prefer to leave her unwitting.