Hello. For those of you who might have received two emails that I had updated I apologize. I hit update before checking format and it was screwed up. Part of my love/hate relationship with this site is that it is not an easy program to edit/change/or even use in general. I tried to clean it up the best I could but if I missed anything, I apologize in advance.
Thanks for understanding and, as always and forever, thank you so much for reading my fic.
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Chapter 26
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TO: MFitzgeraldfbi.us.gov
FROM: SSpadefbi.us.gov
DATE: January 17, 2009
SUBJECT: Bridezilla
Please explain to me how a woman who is accomplished and intelligent can go completely insane the moment someone places a diamond ring on her finger? Today Elena sent me seven text messages about what style of shoes the bridesmaids should wear.
Seven messages, Martin. SEVEN messages about SHOES!!
To top it off, I have been sleeping lousy. Some new tenants moved in upstairs and now it sounds like elves are tap dancing on my roof.
XXX
TO: SSpadefbi.us.gov
FROM: MFitzgeraldfbi.us.gov
DATE: January 17, 2009
SUBJECT: RE: Bridezilla
Shoes are actually quite important, Sam. As the best man I have to deal with my own footwear drama as well. Danny told me I had to wear shoes and they should be black.
As for the tap dancing elves, maybe you can persuade them to take up ballet?
XXX
TO: MFitzgeraldfbi.us.gov
FROM: SSpadefbi.us.gov
DATE: January 29, 2009
SUBJECT: Another Engagement Party?
Are you going to the latest engagement party next weekend? I think it's your turn. You went to the first one and I went to the second, so I think its back to you. ;-D
Question: exactly how many parties does one couple need to have? They've been engaged for nine months and this is the third party. I'm beginning to think it's just a con to get more gifts.
P.S. Did you see the game last night? Go Knicks!
XXX
TO: SSpadefbi.us.gov
FROM: MFitzgeraldfbi.us.gov
DATE: January 30, 2009
SUBJECT: RE: Another Engagement Party?
I guess it is my turn. For your sake I shall make an appearance and tell everyone how terrible you feel about not being able to attend the third party as it is being thrown by all of Elena's second cousins from Puerto Rico. I think you're right about the gifts. Did you see that Danny registered for a flat screen TV? I think he's going to keep letting them throw these parties until someone buys it for them.
P.S. I did see the game and it was great! The last twenty minutes were a real nail biter. This may be the Knicks year.
XXX
TO: MFitzgeraldfbi.us.gov
FROM: SSpadefbi.us.gov
DATE: January 30, 2009
SUBJECT: RE: RE: Another Engagement Party?
Have fun at the party and tell Danny there is no way in hell I am going to buy him that TV. Between the cost of the dress, shoes, hair, jewelry, plane ticket, hotel room, and dealing with the endless stream of wedding texts from Elena, I think they should buy me a gift. A very expensive gift.
XXX
TO: SSpadefbi.us.gov
FROM: MFitzgeraldfbi.us.gov
DATE: February 16, 2009
SUBJECT: Engagement Party
You missed a great party. Elena's brother Chris' wife got really drunk and flirty with Danny and this did not please Chris or Elena at all. If you remember, Chris is the brother who is training to be an ultimate fighter. It's a good thing Danny knows how to defend himself. Thankfully, between Elena's cousins and me, we were able to separate them and I am sure that his nose will heal by the wedding. As for Elena's sister-in-law, she now knows what Elena's right hook feels like.
I also got Elena and Danny an engagement gift that I think will make you very happy. I tried calling you this weekend to tell you about it but your phone was "out of range"? Did you go do something fun while I had to listen to Elena's uncle tell me about his corn removal surgery?
P.S. Bummer about the Knicks last night.
XXX
TO: MFitzgeraldfbi.us.gov
FROM: SSpadefbi.us.gov
DATE: February 16, 2009
SUBJECT: RE: Engagement Party
THANK YOU! THANK YOU! THANK YOU! I talked to Elena this morning and she told me about your gift. Getting them a wedding planner was the best idea ever! I don't know why I never thought about it before – it's brilliant. I am eternally in your debt. It's almost three in the afternoon and I haven't had a single text from Elena. It's wonderful. You are my hero.
P.S. Sorry I missed your call. I was in Napa for the weekend.
XXX
TO: SSpadefbi.us.gov
FROM: MFitzgeraldfbi.us.gov
DATE: February 17, 2009
SUBJECT: RE: RE: Engagement Party
You're welcome but it wasn't just for you. I was getting tired of Danny's constant pestering about my black shoes. Wanting to make sure I was going to wear both the left and the right shoe…it was excruciating. Of course, Danny being Danny he was upset that I spent the money on a wedding planner instead of the TV. The TV is still on the registry by the way so there may be another engagement party in your future. ;-P
How was Napa Valley? I hear that is the west coast equivalent of Vermont. Did you go alone or maybe with a friend?
XXX
TO: MFitzgeraldfbi.us.gov
FROM: SSpadefbi.us.gov
DATE: February 18, 2009
SUBJECT: RE: RE: RE: Engagement Party
Yes, I can see how you were being put out with the shoe situation. Either way, the hiring of the wedding planner is definitely the gift that keeps on giving. As far as the TV is concerned, Danny can throw as many parties as he wants, there is no way I'm buying it.
To answer your other question, I went with someone that I have been seeing. I figured I should follow your lead and learn to move on. I've decided that you were right; I deserve a little happiness, too.
XXX
TO: SSpadefbi.us.gov
FROM: MFitzgeraldfbi.us.gov
DATE: February 18, 2009
SUBJECT: RE: RE: RE: RE: Engagement Party
It's great that you are dating someone. That's really great. Good for you.
XXX
TO: MFitzgeraldfbi.us.gov
FROM: SSpadefbi.us.gov
DATE: February 28, 2009
SUBJECT: Divided Loyalties
Did you notice that if the basketball season continues the way it has that the Knicks and the Wolverines are going to be pitted against one another during the playoffs? What is a girl to do?
XXX
TO: SSpadefbi.us.gov
FROM: MFitzgeraldfbi.us.gov
DATE: March 1, 2009
SUBJECT: RE: Divided Loyalties
I did notice that Wisconsin is going head-to-head with NY. It's going to be a lot of fun to watch. Any chance you want to make it interesting?
By the way, Happy Birthday. Have an extra slice of cake for me.
XXX
TO: MFitzgeraldfbi.us.gov
FROM: SSpadefbi.us.gov
DATE: March 1, 2009
SUBJECT: RE: Divided Loyalties
Thanks for remembering my birthday. But I'm not having a slice of cake for you. It may be in your honor but it still ends up on my thighs. ;-)
As for the bet, you are on. I am willing to lay down fifty bucks that my corn fed Wisconsin boys will kick some city butt.
XXX
TO: SSpadefbi.us.gov
FROM: MFitzgeraldfbi.us.gov
DATE: March 23, 2009
SUBJECT: Victory is sweet.
Alas, the power of corn could not help your mid-west boys. It was a helluva game. It was tight the whole game and your boys were in the lead for most of it but, man, the last five seconds were amazing! Who would have thought Balkman would make that three pointer? Great game.
So, will you be paying in cash or check?
XXX
TO: MFitzgeraldfbi.us.gov
FROM: SSpadefbi.us.gov
DATE: March 24, 2009
SUBJECT: RE: Victory is Sweet
Smugness does not become you.
But yeah, it was a great game. I honestly thought my boys had it wrapped up until the very end. But a bet is a bet and I have sent you your money. I sent cash so be on the lookout for it.
XXX
TO: SSpadefbi.us.gov
FROM: MFitzgeraldfbi.us.gov
DATE: March 24, 2009
SUBJECT: Petty Cash?
I got your package. I wondered why you sent me the money in a box but when I opened it and found a ceramic corn filled with fifty dollars worth nickels it made total sense. Very funny smartass.
XXX
TO: MFitzgeraldfbi.us.gov
FROM: SSpadefbi.us.gov
DATE: April 22, 2009
SUBJECT: Favor
Marty, I hope and pray that you can do me one teensy weensy favor. We are investigating the disappearance of a woman who was working on a getting a VISA for a friend but we don't have a name. We can't get anyone in the State Department to help us. I know you have lots of connections any chance you can help me out? Maybe direct me to someone I can talk to? Please? Pretty please with a cherry on top?
P.S. I'm going to be in NY from May 14-17th for Elena's bridal shower. (Which, by the way, is party number 4 for the happy couple.) Any chance you can sneak up there and we can all hang out?
XXX
TO: SSpadefbi.us.gov
FROM: MFitzgeraldfbi.us.gov
DATE: April 22, 2009
SUBJECT: RE: Favor
I called up my friend, Seth Kennedy, who works for the State Dept. He said that he would be happy to help you out. Just give him a call at 310-555-8758. Good luck on finding your MP.
I wish I could meet up with you and Danny and Elena in NY but I am going to be in London. Rachel's tour with DWOB is over so we are going to meet up there. Sorry. It would have been fun to hang out. Otherwise I will see you at the wedding. I will be that guy standing behind the groom.