Chapter 27

XXXXXXX

"You must really like this new guy you're seeing," Sarah commented.

Sam turned around from her computer to look over at her friend. "What do you mean?"

Sarah lowered the papers she was holding and replied, "Every time he sends you an email you get that silly grin on your face. You whole face lights up." She shrugged as she started reading through her report again and added, "It's cute."

Sam quickly looked away, afraid the expression on her face would give her away. She knew that Cedric wasn't the cause for the smile on her face. She glanced at the computer monitor to see Martin's email message on the screen. She closed her eyes at having to admit the truth she had been trying to deny. She may have moved away but she hadn't moved on. She tried to pretend that they were getting back to just being friends but each email, not matter how brief, gave her a thrill. She was more excited to get one of his emails than go out on a date with Cedric.

Cedric.

He was a great guy. He was nice, thoughtful, handsome, and a whole lot like Martin but just not enough. Fortunately she realized that he was just the ersatz version of the man she really wanted before they got too serious. She wanted to move on and learn to be in a real relationship but no matter how hard she tried she missed Martin. She tried to comfort herself in thinking that maybe just having his friendship back would be enough but when she lay alone at night her thoughts still strayed towards Martin. She would stare up at her ceiling fan, watching the blades spin round and round wondering what he was doing or if he enjoyed their email exchanges as much as she did.

When she told him that she was dating someone she secretly hoped he would get jealous but when he replied that he was happy for her – it stung. Once again, the one she loved was over her but here she was, hanging on.

She did her best to try and bury those feelings deep down but on those rare occasions when they talked on the phone it became harder to deny. Particularly after their conversation last weekend…

XXX

Sam grabbed her book, cell, and ice water off of the coffee table and headed out onto the balcony. It was another beautiful Sunday morning in Los Angeles and she planned on spending it sitting on the lounge chair, reading a good book and soaking up some sunshine. She was halfway through chapter four when her cell phone rang. She bookmarked her page and reached over for her phone. Her lips curved up into a smile when she read the caller-ID. "Good morning, Marty."

She heard him laugh softly on the other end. "It might be morning over there but here on the east coast I'm having lunch."

"My apologies for forgetting about the time difference," she replied, sinking further down into her chair. Just the sound of his voice in her ear set her heart a flutter. She heard him shout for Tanner so she asked, "What are you up to?"

"I'm at the dog park. Tanner likes to wrestle with the Great Dane named Seamus. I think it's just because he likes playing with a dog that is bigger than he is." A mental picture of Martin appeared in her mind of him wearing his casual weekend clothes: a pair of loose fitting jeans, a t-shirt and sneakers. He shouted something at the dog again before saying, "What about you? What are you doing?"

"Reading a book and enjoying another beautiful day in la-la land," she replied as she stared out at the row of palm trees that lined her street. A soft breeze passed through and she added, "I still can't get over how great the weather is here. The days are warm but the nights are always cool. If I was back east I'd have to deal with sweltering heat and suffocating humidity."

"Don't go knocking my side of the country. At least we don't have to deal with earthquakes and wild fires."

"A small price to pay," she replied with a laugh as she propped her bare feet up on the rail.

"Anyway," he segued with a chuckle. "The reason I am calling is I need some help with the bachelor party."

"I am not going to pop out of cake wearing just a negligee and a smile for you no matter how much you beg," she teased.

"That's not why I called but thank you very much for the vivid image," he replied. She couldn't help but notice that his tone almost sounded almost…aroused? He cleared his throat and continued, "I actually just need some advice on what kind of bachelor party to have when the groom is a recovering alcoholic who was in a recent altercation with his future brother-in-law, the bride's very Roman Catholic father insists on attending, two of the other groomsmen are under 21, another has converted to Islam, and Rafi is on parole but has to wear an ankle band and be home by eleven to check in with his parole office."

"Wow, I guess that means no back room at the local gentlemen's club with lots of booze and lap dances," she replied.

"Yeah," he agreed. "This was so much easier when I planned one for my frat buddy. Straight out of college all you had to do is get the guys drunk and guarantee them they can see at least one girl strip."

"Ah, yes, the good old days," she joked.

"So, do you have any ideas?"

She considered it and while she did have an idea she wanted to extend this conversation as long as she possible so she asked, "What do I know about planning a party aimed at ushering a man into marriage by reminding him of everything he is giving up by exploiting women and drinking copious amounts of booze."

"It's a right of passage. A final reminder of all that a man is giving up for the woman he loves."

"So, what, it's like his final temptation? If he can face all of those vices and still decide to get married it shows he is really committed?"

"Exactly."

She shook her head and with a grin on her face said, "That's a lot of BS, Martin, and you know it."

"Maybe so but its tradition," he laughingly replied. "So, are you going to help me or not?"

She smiled thoughtfully as she stared at her toenails, deciding that she needed to get a pedicure very soon. "What about having it at a sports bar? The drinkers can drink but it's wholesome enough for the underage guys. There will also be a TV screens to distract the guys from having to look at one another when they don't want to, it will be easy for Rafi to get home on time, and I'm pretty sure the Catholic church is okay with organized sports."

"That's a really good idea," Martin replied. "Thanks."

Sam tilted her head up to see a few puffy white clouds floating above. "You know, I'm sure you would have figured something out without my help."

"But then I wouldn't have an excuse to call you," he softly replied.

She went quiet at hearing his words, her heart skipping in her chest. She opened her mouth to reply when suddenly Cedric appeared on the balcony.

"Hey, I knocked but I guess you didn't hear me." He kissed her softly on the head when he noticed what she was holding. "Sorry, I didn't realize you were on the phone."

"I should let you go," Martin announced in her ear. "Thanks again for your help."

She gestured to Cedric to hang on as she walked back into her apartment. She pressed the cell phone firmly to her ear and said, "Um, you're welcome."

It was quiet for a long beat before Martin finally said, "Bye, Sam. Enjoy your Sunday."

She closed her eyes and breathed out, "You too Martin."

She clicked her phone shut and held it to her chest. She turned and watched as Cedric sat on the lounge chair flipping through her book. She knew he was a nice guy and any girl would be lucky to have him but she also knew that she wasn't the girl.

XXX

Sam opened her eyes and stared at the message on her monitor. On the monitor there was just a simple email about nothing in particular, just Martin asking if she was following baseball. There were no words of love, longing, or regret. Just one line asking her if she had gone to any Angels' games.

She reached over for the mouse and moved the cursor over the reply button. Her finger hovered over the clicker before she moved the mouse and clicked on the close button. She couldn't bring herself to reply – at least not right now. She had grown enough to know that it was unhealthy for her to keep rejecting real live men who wanted to be with her so she could continue an imaginary one sided relationship with Martin via email while he was still dating a very real woman.

She needed some time and some distance. She would have to see both Martin and Rachel at the wedding a few weeks and the last thing she wanted was for him to see her looking sad and morose. Particularly since she was going to be attending the wedding solo. She suddenly regretted having ended it with Cedric before the wedding. She really wished she had a hot date to show off to make Martin realize what he lost. Instead she will have to settle for trying to look as hot as she could so that he would not only see what he gave up but also know that she would be incredibly sexy but completely off limits since he would be there with Rachel. The only thing that would make it better for her is if Rachel had contracted some sort of blotchy skin rash while she was in Haiti.

While she knew it was a ridiculous and slightly evil thought, it still brought a smile to Sam's face.