THE WHITE ROOM - Part 9

Walter nodded to Rodney as he sat down in front of the monitor. "Hermiod's ready, Dr. McKay."

Rodney wasted no time. "Hermiod, I need your help with something."

The large eyes of the Asgard blinked once slowly as he gave an almost imperceptible nod. "I have been apprised of Colonel Sheppard's condition. How can I help?"

"We think knowledge from the Ancients has somehow been downloaded into the Colonel's brain."

"Like what happened to General O'Neill?" asked Hermiod.

Rodney quirked his mouth to one side and frowned. How was he going to explain this when he didn't really understand it himself? "Yes and no. He's suddenly speaking Ancient, which I assure you Sheppard doesn't normally do, so we know it was Ancient information that was added, we just don't know how or when. He hasn't been in contact with anything even remotely able to do this in weeks. Plus, there's more to it than just knowledge we think. He hasn't been able to get out more than a handful of words, but what he has combined with his actions seems to indicate he's also had . . . memories . . . or maybe some kind of personal logs added as well."

Hermiod tilted his head slightly, as if thinking. He didn't really have an expression to read and that annoyed Rodney. "The Ancients did create some data bases with both information and personal memories from some of their population. These were actual memories copied from the brain, complete with any sensory information that accompanied the event. It would seem to anyone accessing one of these memories as if they were experiencing the event."

Rodney felt almost dizzy as the ramifications of what Hermiod said hit home. "So if all these memories are mixed up in his head and popping up several at a time, along with his own memories and the downloaded information . . . Oh my God, no wonder he's totally out of his mind."

Hermiod nodded. "It would be very intimidating, indeed. We should remove the Ancient information quickly, before it causes irreparable damage, if it has not done so already."

Rodney shook his head. "There's an Asgard here named Kel who's been working with a doctor to help Sheppard. He hooked up some kind of gizmo to test the Colonel, but when he tried to remove some of the information, it sent Sheppard into a seizure. He said he doesn't think he can help the Colonel."

"That is unfortunate. But I fail to see how I can help."

Rodney leaned forward slightly, more desperate that ever to help Sheppard. "We know this stuff wasn't downloaded into Sheppard like it was in O'Neill. Not only has Sheppard not been in contact with any of those Ancient repository things, but it's affecting him differently than it did O'Neill. I think whatever caused this happened aboard the Daedalus. All this started shortly after all those trips to the ship and his headache started right in the middle of all that beaming around we did."

"But you accompanied the Colonel on all his trips aboard. Did you see anything to make you think something was done to the Colonel?"

"No, but there was one trip where he got there a while before me. Maybe something happened before I came aboard. Look, I don't even know what we're looking for, I just don't see anything else that could explain this."

Hermiod sat silently for a few seconds before giving in. "I will go back through all of our transmissions and sensor readings for that time period to look for anomalies."

Rodney breathed out and nodded tiredly. The stress and lack of sleep was beginning to catch up to him. "Thanks. I just . . . I need to find something to help him."

"I will do what I can. And Dr. McKay, you would be wise to keep watch over the Colonel. Kel has been involved in some questionable research in the past and I am not at all sure that he has Colonel Sheppard's best interests in mind."

Rodney sighed loudly. It figured. "And he's the one I thought I could trust. I know Purdie's up to something. We should have just stayed in Atlantis. At least we didn't have to watch our back there."

"I am sorry for your distress, Dr. McKay. I will try to find something that can help."

Rodney gave him a short nod. "Contact me if you find anything."

Hermiod nodded before breaking the connection. Rodney turned sideways to face Walter again, pausing to yawn. "I need to contact Atlantis."

Walter nodded as if he'd expected the request. "General O'Neill mentioned you might. Just give me a few seconds to make the connection." Walter immediately began punching buttons to dial the city. Within a minute, Rodney was looking at Elizabeth.

"Rodney, I didn't expect to hear from you today. Good news, I hope."

Rodney tried to smile, taking in her blatantly hopeful expression. His earlier excitement had been dimmed by the revelation of just what kind of hell Sheppard was probably trapped in. "Yes, it is. He's still in there, Elizabeth and I have proof. His eyes focused on me for a few moments and he called me azul. I think he remembers me."

Elizabeth's eyes widened and her face brightened. "Oh, Rodney . . . you really think he knew you?"

"I do, if only for a few moments." Rodney's spirits got a small boost as he remembered the look of recognition in Sheppard's eyes.

Elizabeth nodded. "That is good news. Have you made any progress on figuring out what happened or finding a way to help John?"

Rodney glanced down and bit his lip a second before addressing the questions. "Some, but this is the bad news. Kel and Purdie tried something new and it caused the Colonel to have a seizure."

"What?" The alarm in Elizabeth's voice and face was unmistakable.

"He's okay, it didn't last long. But some weird things have been going on over here and I don't trust these people. O'Neill got his medical records together and I've added some of my own notes and pictures. Walter's going to send them in a minute and I want Carson to take a look. I need to know if they're doing anything to him to make him worse. They've been giving him an IV and I don't know what's in it or what to look for. I need to know what to do."

Elizabeth's face tightened, the muscle in her jaw twitching. "I'll get it to him. Do you really think he's not safe there?"

Rodney shrugged his shoulders and rubbed the side of his aching head. "I have no idea, but I'm worried. Kel finally admitted after sending Sheppard into convulsions that he probably can't help him. I'm just afraid that now they'll think of him as their own personal lab rat and try to dissect his brain or something."

"Rodney."

"Okay, okay, so O'Neill would never let that happen. I think he kind of likes Sheppard, kindred spirits or something. I talked to Hermiod and he's going to look for anything unusual on the Daedalus. I still think that's where this whole thing started."

Elizabeth nodded as she thinned her lips. "I'm beginning to agree with you. Ronon, Teyla, and Major Lorne have retraced your steps for the last several weeks and there just isn't anything to explain this."

Rodney nodded in agreement. "The Daedalus has to be the answer. And Hermiod said the Ancients had repositories that stored memories, complete with sensory awareness, along with the factual stuff. I think the Colonel is basically reliving every aspect of several memories at once. If he isn't already stark raving insane, he will be shortly if we don't get that stuff out of his head."

"Oh, Rodney," Elizabeth said softly.

The stricken look on Elizabeth's face made the scientist regret his outburst. He felt so helpless. "I know," he responded quietly.

Elizabeth took a deep breath, trying to regain her composure. "Is there anything we can do?"

"Just let me know if Carson thinks I need to be doing anything. I'm afraid to leave him alone for any length of time, so General O'Neill is with him now. I should probably get back before Sheppard wakes up."

Elizabeth nodded. "Take care of him for me Rodney, and take care of yourself too. You need sleep."

"I can sleep later. Right now I need to watch the Colonel's back."

"I want him back, Rodney. I need him. Atlantis needs him."

Rodney looked at her through the monitor, so very far away. "We all do. Tell everyone hi for me and I'll talk to you soon." Rodney turned to Walter, who was watching him expectantly. "Send it."

oOo

Rodney stood at the observation window for a few moments, watching O'Neill and Sheppard. The colonel was curled up in the bed, both arms wrapped protectively around the disc. His eyes were only half open and he was mumbling softly to himself. O'Neill leaned forward in his seat, concentration heavy on his face, as if he was trying to understand what Sheppard was saying. Rodney smiled, feeling more and more like this was a man he could trust. Pushing back from the window, he entered the white room.

"Did he say anything of interest?" asked Rodney.

O'Neill sat back in the chair and glanced up at the scientist. "Heck if I know. I think I caught the word trapped once or twice."

Rodney stared at O'Neill in confusion. "He said trapped?"

O'Neill shrugged his shoulders as he unfolded his long frame from the chair. "Well, not the word trapped, per say, but irretiri. At least I think that's the Ancient word for trapped."

"I thought you didn't speak Ancient."

"I don't. Daniel gave me and Teal'c a sort of a mini crash course a few years back when we had our own personal version of Groundhog Day. I've tried to forget as much of that whole experience as possible, but as luck would have it, a few words have escaped my efforts and are apparently lodged in my brain. Imagine my surprise."

Rodney nodded as understanding swept across his face. "Oh, yeah, I remember reading that report now. Quite fascinating, actually, although I probably would have –"

"McKay, save it for Carter," O'Neill said wryly. "I can pretty much guarantee that whatever you are about to say would be completely wasted on me."

Rodney breathed out and gave a single nod of acceptance. "Thanks for staying with the Colonel and for getting the medical reports together. I sent them to Elizabeth and she's going to pass them on to Carson."

"No problem. Look, for what it's worth, I really only meant to help Sheppard, not hurt him. He deserves better than this."

"Yes, he does. Just don't let those clowns near him again, at least not until I hear from Carson," asked Rodney.

"That I can do. Now, you need to get some rest McKay, and something to eat."

Rodney looked at John and was suddenly struck by how helpless he looked. He had to swallow hard to keep the emotions pushed down and out of the way. "I don't want to leave him alone right now. Now that I understand better what he's fighting, I want to be here incase he gets a moment of lucidity. He should have a friendly, familiar face here."

O'Neill watched Rodney as he studied Sheppard. "All right, I can't say I'd do any differently if it was one of my team. I'll have some food and a cot brought up for you."

"Sistere!" Both men turned at the sound of John's yell. "Sistere, sistere, sistere," he repeated frantically, raking both hands back and forth through his hair as he twisted his head side to side and resumed mumbling.

"What's he saying?" asked O'Neill.

"Stop," replied Rodney as he stepped in front of John and grabbed his wrists, stopping the frantic motion. Pushing John's hands down in his lap, Rodney then placed his palms on the sides of John's face and leaned forward, their noses only inches apart. "Colonel, it's Rodney," he said slowly and firmly. "I'm here and everything's okay. Just calm down and listen to me. You're going to be all right and I'll be right here with you."

John stilled and his eyes seemed to focus momentarily. "Azur."

Rodney smiled and relaxed his grip. "Yes, azur. I won't leave you."

John brought the disc up and ran his hand across it, smiling briefly as his face relaxed. A few seconds later, his eyes narrowed and his brow furrowed as he brought one hand up to the side of his head.

"Injuriae."

"I know it hurts, but hang on. We're going to find a way to help you."

"Azur."

Rodney nodded. "Azur will help you."

"Lantea." John rolled away from Rodney and out of the bed, stumbling to the wall. Shifting the disc to his left hand, he ran his right one gently along the wall, carefully making his way around the room.

"He's searching for Atlantis again," explained Rodney before O'Neill had a chance to ask. "He misses her."

When John made it back to the corner he'd started from, his hand dropped limply to his side. Letting out a strangled whimper, he crouched down against the wall, his knees drawn up to his chest and the disc cradled against him. Closing his eyes, he began to rock gently and whispering to himself.

They stood watching for several minutes before O'Neill finally tore his gaze away. "I'll, uh, just go see to getting that stuff for you." His voice was a bit shakier than he had intended.

"Thanks," Rodney said. Just before the door closed, he turned to O'Neill's retreating back. "Hey, no citrus."

oOo

The voices and images rolled and surged, pushing each other out of the way in their quest for his attention. Familiar voices and not so familiar voices. Running across a field in a strange uniform, firing a weapon he was unfamiliar with, protecting people he didn't know. But then he was laying down cover fire for his team. Blood on his hands and clothes, then water, then sand and dirt. He was hot. He was cold. Words and sounds he knew, but he didn't know. His one thought was for silence and darkness, but neither would come.

As the panic and pain in his head grew, John begged for the onslaught to stop, but it didn't. As he struggled against the flashing imagery and noise, a familiar voice penetrated the fog and drew his attention. Focusing with all his might, he was able to see beyond the scenes in his head for a few seconds. His friend. Rodney. For a brief moment, he felt hope, lasting until the chaos in his head took over and drowned everything else out. He reached out for the singing that always comforted him, but it wasn't there, only a small hum. Reaching out with his mind, he searched for her, knowing she could help him, but found only silence. As the pain in his head escalated, he gave up and went back to the hum and the small amount of relief that it provided.

oOo

Elizabeth sat staring at her computer screen, her mind in a completely different galaxy. The helpless, confused look on John's face kept popping into her mind, making her shudder with fear for him.

"Dr. Weir?"

Elizabeth jumped, jerking her head up to see Teyla standing in the doorway to her office, Ronon's large form looming behind her. "Oh, sorry . . . guess I let my mind wander. Come in, please. Did you find anything?" Her tone of voice displayed the fact that she didn't expect that they had.

Teyla took a seat while Ronon leaned against the wall, his arms across his chest. "We did not find anything that would explain the Colonel's condition," said Teyla. "We have been to every world we visited in the last three months. I do not believe continuing these searches will provide anything useful."

"I agree," said Elizabeth. "I talked to Rodney earlier today and he's more convinced than ever that something happened to John aboard the Daedalus. He's convinced Hermiod to check all their readings during the time John was on board to see if he can find anything. I just hope they're able to . . . " She trailed off as she watched a very angry Carson Beckett storm into her office.

Two steps in the doorway, Carson tossed several photos on Elizabeth's desk, sending them sliding across the surface to splay out in front of her. He then proceeded to pace restlessly back and forth in the narrow space in front of her desk, his breathing loud and fast. If she hadn't seen him come through the door, she would have thought Rodney was there to embark on a tirade about his incompetent staff.

"Just look at those and tell me what you see," he finally barked.

Elizabeth exchanged a glance with Teyla and then looked down at the photos. The first two were different views of an arm showing livid bruising scattered from the wrist to just above the elbow. She looked at it for several seconds before it occurred to her what it must be. "Is this John?"

Carson stopped in front of her. "Aye. See this," he said, pointing to the discolored area just above and below the elbow. "What does that look like?"

She stared at the familiar pattern for a few moments before she got it. "Is that a handprint . . . finger marks?"

"Aye, it is. That's where those bloody fools held him down so hard they left bruises where they gripped him. But it's the next two that really make my blood boil."

Elizabeth shuffled the photos to move the bottom two to the top. They were two different angles of John's neck, once again showing dark bruises. She squinted, her mouth dropping open slightly. "Oh, Carson, they didn't," she whispered.

Teyla and Ronon both moved up to see the photos. Teyla gasped as Ronon clenched his fists and growled in anger. "They strangled him?" asked Teyla in shock.

"Aye," Carson said, his voice tight with emotion. "They got tired of fighting him, so they cut off his oxygen until he passed out and they could sedate him." He paced back and forth a few times before turning back to the trio at the desk. "I'll admit when Colonel Sheppard is disoriented, he can be a handful. And I won't pretend that my staff hasn't put a few bruises on him when he was fighting us. But never anything like this and I guarantee they always had more injuries inflicted by him than the other way around. That's because we care about our patients and we believe we must strive to do no harm, even when the patient isn't exactly cooperative. This is inexcusable under any circumstances."

Ronon hit his clenched fist against his thigh and grunted. "Is this the way your people treat their injured soldiers?"

Elizabeth shook her head. "No, of course not. But like most other societies, we have some people that . . . don't really have much in the way of standards. Sometimes they get in a position where they can hurt people. I'm afraid that's what's happened here."

Carson looked down at the photos. "I'm going to the SGC so I can help Rodney look after the Colonel, at least until he gets a chance to talk to Hermiod. I need to make sure Colonel Sheppard's okay. I owe the lad that much."

"I'm going with you," announced Ronon. "Sheppard needs someone to watch his back while he's down."

"I would like to go as well," said Teyla.

Elizabeth sat staring at the concerned people in front of her. She was proud of them for wanting to protect John and she wanted them to go, but she knew there was a chance they wouldn't be able to.

"Look, I'm all for the three of you going, but you have to realize a few things. It's not up to me, it's up to General O'Neill. And even if he let's Carson go, he may not allow Ronon and Teyla."

"You can convince him," Ronon said confidently.

Elizabeth had to smile at the runner's confidence in her. "Well, I can certainly try. And this is not permanent. Atlantis needs the three of you and Rodney as much as it needs John. If there's nothing that can be done, you'll have to come back in a few days."

"Then we will bring him back home," said Teyla. "We will care for him and make sure he is tended to in a manner that gives him the respect he deserves, that he has earned. Atlantis is his home now."

Elizabeth dropped her head sadly and sighed before looking back up at the Athosian. "Teyla, in a sense I agree with you, but it will never happen. This is an expedition and someone with serious, debilitating injuries cannot be cared for here. We aren't set up for that and it drains personnel needed for the expedition. I can guarantee the Air Force will not let him return unless he's been cured of whatever this is or unless there is a substantial chance that returning him to the city will help him recover. So far there is no evidence of that."

"We cannot leave him on Earth with people that do not care for him and will not protect him from harm. He should be here with his friends . . . his family." Teyla's expression was as firm as her voice.

Elizabeth knew how she felt. Elizabeth wanted John back in Atlantis, even if he never got the help he needed. He belonged here. "Let's just hope it doesn't come to that. I'll contact General O'Neill and ask about the three of you going to Earth for a few days, at least until Rodney's had a chance to consult with Hermiod about the Daedalus."

"Good," said Carson. "When will you be contacting the General?"

Elizabeth could tell that the people in front of her weren't leaving until she had made the request. "I guess now, since you people seem to be relentless."

Ronon nodded. "Then we can pack."

Elizabeth left her office with three anxious people trailing behind her, wondering what she would do if O'Neill said no.

TBC