Yeah, the second poem shouldn't have shown up until WAY later, but let's just say there was an accident involving a pencil, a bookmark, a girl, and a time machine.
By the way, the chopsticks part actually happens once in the manga. Oh, and these poems aren't haikus…they're just three-liners, with the first and last ones rhyming.
Pure syllable shit
Whoever thought up haikus
Was a cruel sadist
"Aaahhh!" Kyo let out the sigh of relief, sinking back onto the bed, arms thrown casually out to the sides. He shifted his left to pick up the book of poems. Despite Yuki's icy stare, he'd made his way back to his room, spirits relatively undampened, with the promise of more of the understanding, if morbid, touch this author brought. The next poem, however, didn't touch him in quite the same way. It more like made him want to puke.
"Butterfly wings of sunlight
Sugar-sweet smile full of warmth
Love me? You might."
The next one seemed too trivial, and it frustrated Kyo. Where was this beautiful, slightly depressed writing he had experienced while rereading the Moonlight poem? He glanced at the clock.
"You'll bring me grief
You ruin snowfall - you'll ruin me
Love me? Love my maple leaf?"
The one underneath it, on the same page (they all seemed to go together), connected more with him. Kyo found his hand drifting up to brush against his orange locks, an intense look in his eyes that he usually only got during a fight with Yuki or while training at Shishou's.
"You brushed me off as a kid
You didn't care, maybe now you do
Love me? Fat lot of good it did."
This mysterious author's sadistic streak was making a much-wanted re-appearance. This poem made Kyo clench his hand into a fist, razor-sharp claws - er, fingernails - digging into the palm of his hand, although if it hurt, Kyo didn't notice.
"We coexisted
You told me I was black, like your heart
Love me? You're twisted!"
The next one was bringing back that painful ache, not in his Advil-eased muscles, but deep in his chest. Kyo loved that feeling - it proved he was alive, it filled him with a not-entirely bad sensation of desperate longing. For some reason, when he caught that feeling of un-satiateable need, a hint of lavender drifted into his nose, making Kyo sneeze, a hint the corner of a thickly-lashed eye drifted into his mind, making Kyo uncomfortable, restless. This time, though, Kyo welcomed the feeling
"Hair so warm
Passion so hot
Love me? Not! - this I mourn."
A sigh escaped his lips. He could totally agree with the author on this point - that feeling of wanting someone but knowing they could never love you back - perhaps all the zodiac knew how that felt. Except Yuki. Kyo was absolutely sure Yuki had never felt this way about anyone - that damned Rat was too distant, too removed, too frosty. He would never feel this bare instinct, longing. He was too refined. Too. Fucking. Perfect. Kyo hated him. But now he was drifting, and his stomach was alterting him of the fact that it was probably almost time for din-din.
Kyo glanced at the clock again to confirm - he was right for once, and it was time for dinner. And if this was Yuki's book, he was sure Yuki could never fully appreciate the meaning behind those sad, deep words, and Yuki wouldn't be missing it. It HAD been under all that other crap. Kyo was sure that Yuki wouldn't give a damn. It wouldn't matter to Yuki if there was one book missing - the Rat had far too many books, already. Kyo generally wasn't much for reading. Generally.
Kyo placed the book delicately by his bed, glanced at it, thought for a moment, and grabbed his crumpled gi from the corner, throwing it over the book. Just in case Yuki were to, for some unbeknownst reason, walk by his room and happen to see the stolen property lying unprotected in the open. Kyo didn't want the book taken back, he wanted to keep reading it - but then Tohru or Shigure or (God forbid!) Yuki might come up to check on him. Good as his reflexes were, they weren't good enough to hide a book if his door opened suddenly, and only Tohru knocked.
The screen door slid back to reveal Tohru, hand poised to knock. Kyo smiled - a bit blankly, maybe - a little at the effort she always made, at her surprised expression. "Oh! Kyo-kun, I was just coming up to get you!"
"I'd noticed."
They walked together, down the hall, with Tohru in front down the stairs. She was talking about something involving that damn Yuki's garden, and how the whatever was sure to add whatsit to tonight's meal, the only words that really caught Kyo's attention were "food" and "meal". His stomach decided to accent this with an audible growl.
"Kyo-kun is hungry?" Tohru, always pointing out the obvious.
"Uh, yeah," Kyo said. If it wasn't for her so-damn-kind demeanor, he would have said something along the lines of No, my stomach is making a noise akin to a cement mixer because I'm so damn full.
"You sure took a lo-ong time up there," Shigure remarked, eyes twinkling. Kyo rolled his eyes - it hadn't been funny the first time, and it wasn't funny now. Shigure was sitting at the head of the table - something he claimed gave him an air of "Darth Vader-ness" - while Yuki had taken a seat on the left side. Tohru sat next to him, making Kyo twitch slightly, and sit down across from her.
"Itadakimasu," Shigure chirped, Tohru beaming and adding in her two cent's worth, the others echoing her in slightly less enthusiastic voices. "Now, now, that's hardly grateful, now is it? Let's hear it again!"
"Itadak-" Tohru started, but the Dog gleefully covered her mouth with one slightly-callused hand. "Oh, Tohru-kun, you're plenty grateful, I was talking about them."
Two sullen teenagers glared back. Shigure waited.
"Itadakimasu," Kyo growled, voice heavy with forced reluctance. Once Yuki had repeated the words to Shigure's satisfaction, they could finally eat. Kyo's chopsticks were nimble, hungrily picking out some tasty tidbits Tohru had prepared - some of them had obviously been thought up just with his tastes in mind - the salmon roe, for instance. She was so thoughtful like that.
CLACK. Kyo's chopsticks collided with Yuki's in the air, leaving his hand vibrating with absorbed force. One of his cream-colored chopsticks flew across the room, barely missing Tohru's head, clattering softly against the wall before dropping, like a shot bird (no offense, Kureno), to the polished floor. Kyo hardly noticing this, as he was too busy taking offense at what Yuki was doing - namely, throwing his own chopsticks in the sink.
"YOU'RE THROWING THEM OUT?!"
"I don't want your germs, stupid cat," Yuki gave him that princely sneer again, resuming his seat while Kyo stewed silently.
"Yuki-kun, are you sick?" Tohru asked, after a several minutes of idle conversation between her and the pervert sitting at the end of the table. Yuki's plate was nearly untouched, while several of his usual favorites were on the table tonight - or they had been, before Shigure had taken most of them. One could see her reasoning, especially since Yuki seemed to have bags under his eyes. One could also practically see her reasoning, her face was so open - right now it was worried. Kyo wasn't listening. "You usually eat more..."
"No, Honda-san, I'm fine," Yuki smiled a tired smile, turning his head to look at her. "I just can't find my – never mind."
Kyo might have read more into this, might have figured out something that was very important and very relevant, if he wasn't so intent on blatantly ignoring Yuki and Yuki's feelings.
After dinner, I think I'll read some more of that book.
Kyo does not make sense, neh? Well, I'm adding in this note because I originally thought to make this a different chapter. I decided not to. I did re-write a whole lot of this chapter, because Kyo was focusing too much on Yuki, and I wanted him to stop inferring and shut up and read. I am giving his subconscious a couple not-so-subtle nudges, though.
When I was about, say, four, I insisted on sitting at the head of the table because Darth Vader did in one of the movies I owned.
And, yes, this poem is based on the song The Dream by Shinedown, but the chapter title has more to do with Kyo's overly active evil demon teenage hormones.
"Whisper in the tombstones
Toss and turn in your grave
You lie there in the ground
Your spirits rant and rave
From what I see and what I feel
Your angry soul has been restless
So I suggest I help calm you
Before you make a larger mess
Time your tantrums right
And I just may fall for you
I caution, think before you act
But you never do
Love and lust, love and hate
It all goes hand in hand
Throw yourself to instincts
Leave your body to it's own, un-manned
I hope that you're still trying
To win the fight you'll always lose
And that you have someone's shoulder
To cry on and wail your boo-hoos
Before you are locked away
And your will begins to crack
I just wanted to tell you
I loved you, you never loved me back."
There was something about this poem. Something so sad, something so intense, something that drove it's way home inside Kyo's surprisingly tender heart. Something that connected all too well with his own life, although he didn't realize it at the time. Kyo felt tears welling in the corners of his eyes, and for once didn't brush them away.
He did have his pride though, and wouldn't sob, he would be silent, or perhaps someone might hear him and decide to check on him - how many times had he told people he didn't need their pity, their love. Tohru was different. She would accept him, and that was different from what Kagura did, the way she thrust her feelings on him. Kyo quite honestly believed Shigure didn't have feelings. Yuki didn't either. He couldn't. He was just an object, an object in his path to freedom, an object that had to be obliterated.
A noise from outside the door – hurried footsteps, concerned breathing. Kyo thrust the poem book under the sheet, leaping over the book so that his body would hide the lump, should his door open. I'm so paranoid. There's no one out there.
But a knock sounded at his door – or, at least, Kyo thought there was a knock. It was soft, almost tentative, and there was only one light thump against the sliding door. Kyo waited for another knock, to convince him that whoever was on the other side of the door really did want to talk to him, and that he hadn't been imagining the knock in the first place. And so the cat waited.
No second knocks came.
I guess I was imagining it, Kyo mused. More sounds, not knocks, came from the hallway – they were more rushed, flustered footsteps, hastening to stop at every room down the hallway. Kyo – with his sharp little kitty ears – could have sworn he heard a hushed, naturally sensuous, delicate voice breathe, "Did I leave I in…oh, hell, where is it?!"
But maybe he was imagining it. Or maybe Haru lost Kisa again.
Somehow, Kyo doubted it. Maybe Shigure had lost his favorite pen, or Tohru...no. It couldn't be Tohru, she would never talk like that. So it was Shigure, fussing over something trivial - maybe this time it was the picture taken of him and Aya on the Tunnel of Love. The picture he had refused to show to Hiro, Kisa, and Momiji, telling them he would when they were older.
But in none of the seven hells did Shigure ever sound like that...
Kyo brushed the thought off, like a pissed-off horse brushes away flies (or guys who are hitting on her).
Kyo lay in bed – he had woken up a half hour after falling asleep, mind too restless to settle down and go to sleep, no matter how much his body wanted to – gazing at his ceiling, wishing it wasn't there, that he could stare off into space. He muttered a curse, rolling out of bed and climbing onto the roof so that he could loose himself in the starry expanse.
The stars. They shone down at Kyo, pressed firmly into the soft black backdrop that was the midnight sky like little mints in a jewelry box. Kyo let out a long, slow breath. This was peace.
The Cat's bare foot had been tapping out a little rhythm against the tiles of the roof, but it calmed and lay flat, Kyo following suit. He lay on this roof so often, it was more like home to him than the house beneath it. Kyo was an outdoors person. He didn't thrive closed in by walls, he flourished in places like this.
Places like…this? Kyo thought incoherently, before the sandman came to visit.
Hanajima, waving at Kyo, decked out in her horrible, graceful, pure black Cinderella dress, a plate of yakiniku in her other hand. Kyo shuddered. Even in his dream, he could feel the aura of mystique and terror that surrounded the vibe girl.
Tohru, wearing her own beautiful stepsister gown, hand on Hana's shoulder, smiling. Kyo let out a breath with relief – his Tohru would take keep her friend from doing something…dangerous. Uo-chan, Tohru's other best friend, her get-up just as outrageously medieval as the other two – Uo was a prince, a prince who would probably marry the stepsister or Cinderella if Prince Charming didn't, Kyo realized. That was so wrong. Yet so right.
Ayame, adjusting Uotani's costume to perfection. He tweaked the collar a little, shortened one of the ties, and then started on decorating her pants. The silver-haired man was slapped when his hand strayed a little too close to Uo's butt. He apologized, so she let him keep adding fringes to the hem of her shirt. Mine was standing next to the pair, handing Aya items like scissors or pieces of silky ribbon occasionally when he asked for them, smiling her cheerful smile.
A Sprite can. Why was there a Sprite can blocking his vision? Kyo stared at it in disbelief as the can of lemon-lime goodness sprouted little yellow-green wings and flew away, but not before sticking it's tongue out at Kyo's startled face. Kyo was suddenly thirsty.
'Somebody's spiked the Sprite,' Kyo thought. 'It's drunk. And flying away…'
Where was Yuki? The whole gang was here, even Mine, but Yuki was nowhere to be seen. As if on cue to Kyo's thoughts, Yuki spun out from behind the curtain, having finally got his fairy godmother costume on. He seemed to be practicing for the ballet of Cinderella instead of the play, because after piquéing out into the center of the fitting room, he spun elegantly on the ball of one foot, right into a fouetté turn – but his foot caught on his own trailing robe, sending him flying, straight into Kyo's arms.
Kyo was startled when Yuki didn't get up and brush himself off, only tilted his head up at Kyo, possibly committing homicide, smiling rather sheepishly, but happily, like a small child, and held out a can of 7up, it's own little silver wings fluttering inadequately.
"The 7up's been trying to fly as fast as the Sprite, but it can't make it…I've been trying to get them to stop fighting… "
There was a rim-shaped bruise on the 7up's 7. Kyo self-consciously brought his finger up to lightly touch the knuckle-shaped bruise on his own cheek.
"…the 7up finally managed to understand how the Sprite was feeling…look what happened…"
A half-sized can flew by Kyo's nose. When it circled a bit farther away, Kyo could read what it said on the side, next to the nutrition facts. 7ite. Kyo really didn't want to know.
Yuki's grip on Kyo's upper arms tightened, and Kyo found himself looking down into those wide, uncharacteristically content, sparkling mauve eyes, and a warmth spread through his body, almost, but not entirely, unlike that sensation you get when you sip a hot apple cider on a cold winter night. Kyo was finding it hard to hold Yuki up, so the gray-haired boy dropped, like a feather, to his knees, still supported by Kyo.
Kyo turned around to face Tohru. She was talking nonchalantly to her friends, giving them a lovably eager smile, exuding an aura of complete happiness and peace. Kyo removed the crown he was wearing, and tossed it to her.
"Here. You can be Prince Charming…I'll be the fairy godfather, or something…"
The redhead turned back to Yuki, and dropped to his knees on top of some of the excess flowing godmother robes (note to self ask Ayame to trim those a little, Kyo thought), enfolding the slender boy in his warm arms, tipping his head so that he was nose to nose with Yuki, and, closing his eyes—
Just as Kyo woke up, he heard Hanajima say, "Tohru-sama? I think that may be my Air Nike, er, my slipper." and Tohru reply, "Oh! It is! It fits! Then, I have finally found the beautiful young maiden who I had the pleasure of meeting at the ball…that lovely-one night stand…your smile reminded me…your hair in the moonlight…"
Kyo, now fully awake, saw the first rosy hints of the dawn peek out through the grove of trees to the east, and shivered with the early-morning cold that he would long for later in the heat of the day. Someday he would get a bad cold, and regret all those nights sleeping on the roof, but until then, he would enjoy having his head in the air and the welcome reality of the nippy wind.
Finally some sanity. Something real. Kyo didn't quite remember his dream, three minutes after waking up from it, but he knew it involved soda (flying soda!), and he also knew it involved his overly active teenage hormones and…someone. That part he couldn't remember, or maybe that was the part he didn't want to remember. One part of his self wanted to run long and hard, get his hair out of his face, feel that rush, calm down, and the other part wanted to fall back asleep into the dream, continue…whatever he'd been doing in the dream. Kyo couldn't remember. Wouldn't remember. But now, it was slipping through his fingers, and Kyo honestly tried to recall it, but he couldn't manged. He shrugged it off.
Pro'lly wasn't important, anyway.
The spring was turning slowly into summer, Kyo could see. The tree he used to love to climb had dropped most of it's blossoms and some small green things were beginning to grow along the length of it's graceful branches. Kyo could always predict the season's progress with that tree. Today, the elegant arch of that one particular branch – Kyo used to like to pull himself up on it and relax up there – reminded him of a lock of hair, a lock too short, too curved, to be Tohru's.
Say what?
…
That was weird.
Why am I craving citrus?
Yay! Is this one a better length? I wanted to have some evidence that Kyo had feelings too, but I didn't want him to know it...I just wanted to hint, but I'm no good at hinting. My hints are generally anvil-sized, to quote J.K. Rowling. And anvil-shaped. -throws Kyo an anvil that says "You like Yuki, Einstein"-
Kyo: Ooof!
Me: Get the hint?
Kyo: I can't read...
Me: Oh, brother...
Ayame: Yes?