Chapter Five

The hands of the clock moved slowly as the minutes passed by and everyone waited anxiously for any kind of news. Xander had just gone to get some stuff from the vending machines while Giles sat with Joyce and waited.

Spike was waiting outside while Willow went to see if there was any news. "Hey. Have we heard anything?" she asked with hope.

"Not yet," Giles answered. Willow inhaled deeply.

"How's Spike?" Joyce chimed in.

"As good as anyone in his situation could be."

"Should I talk to him?"

"No, he'll be okay. I'm on it… Not him, because I wouldn't do that I meant that I can handle him. Not in a sexual way, in an emotional way- I mean I'm not-"

"I get it," Joyce said.

"Thanks." Willow turned and left feeling slightly humiliated. Spike walked over to her. "Still nothing."

Spike's fists tightened and he let out a low growl. "How are they able to do this? Leave ya sittin' here for an hour not knowin' what's happenin'?"

"Spike, calm down," Willow said. "They can't tell us anything until they know what's going on."

"Ain't that what they went to school for? To find things?"

"Spike, I understand that you're not exactly calm right now but… you just have to try. Wait."

Spike looked at Willow who looked at him with pleading eyes. The more he panicked the more she realized she should panic and she didn't want to. She was silently asking him to compose himself. "Ain't promisin' nothin' Red."

"All I ask is that you try."

Spike fell against the wall and stood with his weight bearing on the brick structure. "I don't like sports," Spike said after ten seconds of silence. A confused glare turned in his direction but he kept staring at the parking lot. "I was thinkin' 'bout the baby and whether or not they would want to play a sport. If they do there ain't gonna be anythin' I can teach'em. And, unless they're night games, I won't be able to see'em either." Willow moved closer and put her arm on his shoulder. "It doesn't really bother me though 'cause I'd still have a baby with the woman I love. Most people don't even get that. Especially vampires since they can't even have kids."

"Can't have kids?" Spike shook his head. "Then… how…"

"Giles looked into it. 'Parently once you have a soul your body works a little like normal. Whatever that is." He looked at Willow who was still perplexed. "Don't look at me. I'm a bloody vampire and even I don't understand how we work. How we move without a heartbeat and how we can breathe but not have breath."

"You are perplexing creatures." This earned another glance from the blonde vampire. "Not that you're a creature. I just meant…" Willow left the sentence unfinished and leaned her back against the wall too. "I never asked how you got your soul."

"No ya didn't."

Willow waited for a story to follow but when one didn't she asked, "Can you tell me?"

Spike rolled himself over so he was facing Willow and leaning on an angle. "What's with the touchy feely moments Red? Why so curious?"

"Because you're in a relationship with my best friend who is currently in the ER."

Spike looked at the ground, understanding what she wasn't saying. She needed to hear about something good that happened to take her mind off what's happening now. Although at the time it didn't seem good to Spike, it obviously was helpful in the long run. "Not much to tell. I killed a Slayer, back in China."

"You killed a Slayer?"

"Just the one," Spike defended. "Anyway, her Watcher knew some black magic types. Somehow she found out I was the one that killed the girl and had a spell put on me. Later that night I suddenly felt this burn throughout my entire body and scratchin' at my skull. I thought it was a delayed side effect from the Slayer blood. Then the Watcher finds me screamin' in the field I was passin' through and she told me I'd been blessed."

"Blessed?"

"That's why it bloody hurt so bad. She said I had a soul and I'd pay for every person I killed. That I'd feel pain everyday for all my days 'cause of what I've done."

"You speak Chinese?"

"She was speakin' broken English. But I spent a good century feelin' like a bloody piss ant for what I done… And then I found Buffy."

Willow's eyes were getting a little watery. "That's so sweet."

"Bloody Shakespeare ain't it?"

"In a way."

Spike looked back out at the parking lot and said, "Think I'm ready to head back inside."

"Me too."

The blonde pushed himself off the wall and Willow followed suit. They walked through the double doors and over to the chairs they were in earlier. Spike plopped down in a chair two seats down from Giles. Willow took the vacant seat on Joyce's left to sit and wait. "Where's Xander?"

"He went to get some stuff from the machines," Giles answered.

On queue, Xander made his way down the hall towards them with a handful of goodies. "All right I got peanut butter cups, Snickers, Cheetos, potato chips and pretzel rods."

"I'll take a Snickers," Willow requested.

"Joyce?"

"Nothing for me thank you."

"Giles?"

"No thanks."

Xander nodded then turned his gaze to Spike. He returned the gaze and shook his head so Xander didn't actually have to ask. Xander opened his mouth to make a comment but he held it in.

The only noise you could hear was Willow pulling back the wrapper of her Snickers and Xander munching on chips. However after his fifth chip he stopped because the crunch of the chips was deafening in comparison to the stillness. "Peanut butter cups it is," he told himself. He opened up the wrapper and popped a whole cup in his mouth.

"Can somebody say something?" Joyce asked. Everyone looked at her then at everyone else to find a non-verbal sign as to what to say. "Anything. Please."

"Uh, I'm sure Buffy's going to be fine," Giles said, not thinking of anything else to talk about. "She's a very strong woman and she's going to fight through this."

"Plus she's got that handy Slayer healing," Xander said, but not too loud.

Their conversation went off track when a doctor with short brown hair walked out and was standing in front of them. "Are you Buffy Summers' family?"

"I'm her mother," Joyce quickly answered, standing up. Everyone mimicked the gesture.

"I'm Dr. Thurner and I've been the one with your daughter."

"Is she okay?"

"She's stable. We were able to control the bleeding and steady her heartbeat."

"She's gonna be okay?"

"After some bed rest."

"And the baby?" Spike said, moving closer. "What about our baby?"

………………………………………………………………………………………………

Half an hour after Buffy was put in a normal room she awoke from unconsciousness. Her head was throbbing and her stomach wasn't feeling too great. Her sight was a little wobbly so she kept her eyes shut for a few minutes.

Could I feel any more horrible? She opened her eyes and was relieved to see the world stop faltering, however the pain was still present. Come on Slayer healing. She placed her hand on the bandaged wound and sat up quickly. Her torso dropped back down to the pillow from the sudden head rush. She took a deep breath and sat up slower this time. Her hand moved all over her stomach trying to see if there was any way to tell if her baby was all right. It's not like it started kicking yet and she sure as hell couldn't feel a heartbeat through her skin. And if she could, there would be a replacing fear.

Where the hell are the doctors? How do I know what's going on unless they tell me? Shouldn't I be under close watch or something? Who isn't doing their job? I'm gonna kick their white coated ass once I can stand. I wonder if I can stand. Damnit Buffy, what the hell's the matter with you? Save your strength. Focus on the baby. Where the hell are the doctors?! How do they expect you to stay sane in here if they don't tell you-

"Miss Summers," a red headed nurse greeted. "How are you feeling?"

"Like there's a hole in my stomach." The nurse nodded and looked at her chart. "Um, does it say anything about the baby?"

"Uh, actually I need to go get Dr. Thurner. He's the one who's been working on you and he should talk to you about everything. I'll be right back."

"A simple 'yes' or 'no' is all I'm asking for," Buffy said as the woman walked out. She let out a sigh and looked up at the ceiling. After what felt like ten minutes, but was really only two, Dr. Thurner walked through the door.

"Miss Summers."

"Please don't."

"Don't what?"

"Don't do the Miss Summers how are you thing because the red head in a blue uniform already covered that. Right now I'm trying to stay calm as I wonder whether or not my baby is okay. So once you tell me, then I'll fill in the blank of 'how are you feeling'."

The doctor took a breath and kept his eyes on her. "We did all we could, but we weren't able to save your baby."