A/N: I just wanted to let everyone know that there are a couple of sexual situations in this chapter, nothing particularly explicit, but there nonetheless. My sister and I have been stuck in our room for the best part of a week (we both have the flu) and she's been watching Sex and the City DVDs non stop. That sort of thing starts to influence you after six or seven hours. On the plus side I did get two and a half chapters written :D

Between too early and too late, there is never more than a moment. - Franz Werfel

Feelings are not supposed to be logical. Dangerous is the man who has rationalized his emotions. - David Borenstein

Chapter Five

Lily and James watched as Sirius said goodbye to his cousin and her family. "So, how come you guys took the Knight Bus to get here?" Lily asked.

"Well, Floo Powder is hard on my parents, so they don't like to use it."

"That makes sense, but why couldn't you all have apparated, you and Sirius are both seventeen. I would have thought that you would have gone to take your tests when you got home from school." Lily said.

James blushed, "Er, we did." He looked down, "I sort of didn't pass. I wound up about fifty kilometers south of where I was supposed to be going."

"Not enough concentration on his destination." Mr. Potter said from behind them.

Lily giggled at the look on James' face, a combination of indignation and embarrassment. Lily patted James' arm, "At least you can apparate at all, I still can't even manage to get into that bloody hoop at school."

James smiled, started walking towards the curb with his family, "I swear if that Ministry guy tells us to concentrate on the three Ds one more time."

"I'd like to tell him to shove his destination, deliberation, and whatever, up his ass. I've a few D words that I think'll do him better." Lily replied following James onto the bus.

"Deranged, disgusting, dickhead?" James asked sitting down.

Lily grinned, "Close." She admitted, "I've named him, the Ministry's detestable, dickless, delegate. Though I've a few other words that I throw in there depending on my mood."

When they got off the Knight Bus at James' house Lily gaped. "This is your house?"

"Yeah, it's been in my family for ages. Dad and his brothers grew up here, since dad's the oldest he took it over when his parents died."

"It's," But Lily was at a loss for words, "wow."

James grinned, "Thanks."

"Jimmy, dear, I've sent Lily's things up to your room." Mrs. Potter watched as her sons mouth dropped open and Lily went bright red, then she grinned, "You'll be sharing with Sirius, of course, Jimmy."

Sirius burst out laughing, "Good one Mrs. P."

Mrs. Potter smiled, "I thought so." She said smugly. "Jimmy, go show Lily up to your room. It's been a long day for everyone, and I'm sure she'd like to go to bed."

Mr. Potter watched as Lily followed James up the stairs, "That wasn't very nice." He whispered.

"No, but very entertaining."

"Sorry about that." James muttered. "Mum likes to joke around."

Lily took a deep breath, gathered up her courage, and looked at James. She noticed he looked about as embarrassed as she felt. "Don't worry about it. I guess that now I know you come by your jokiness naturally."

"Yeah, so, er, this is my room." James said opening a door. The room was large, though not overwhelmingly so. The walls, painted a dark blue, were covered in Quidditch posters, the center of the hardwood floor was covered by a deep green rug, and the queen sized bed was covered in a blue and green plaid comforter. "Sirius and I are next door, and the bathroom's down the hall."

"Okay, thanks." Then swallowing, she stood on her tip toes and placed a light kiss on James' cheek, "And thanks for letting me stay, I didn't really want to go back to school, but my sister was being horrid."

James stared down at her, his eyes dark. She watched as his Adam's apple bobbed, they were standing quite close, neither had moved back from when she had kissed his cheek, and she could feel the heat radiating from him.

Lily watched as his eyes darted to her lips then back up to her eyes, then quite suddenly James had slammed the door and roughly pressed her up against it, her hands pinned above her head. And his lips, his lips were everywhere, her neck, her shoulder, and finally her lips.

Lily moaned and then they were tearing at each others clothes on their way to his bed. And without knowing fully how it had happened Lily was lying under James, naked, on his bed. She pulled his head down to hers and kissed him as she felt him nudge her legs apart.

"Lily."

"Mmm."

"Lily?" Her eyes flew open, she was standing in the doorway to James' room, he was staring at her questioningly. "Are you okay? You sort of drifted off there for a second."

"Er," miserably embarrassed Lily did some very fast thinking, "Oh, I must be more tired than I thought."

"Yeah, it's been a long day. Well, I guess that I'll see you in the morning. Goodnight."

"Night." Lily mumbled. She closed the door quickly after James had turned around and leaned against it. "Oh, my god." She said to the empty room.

The next day Lily woke up to the most amazing smells drifting into the room from somewhere else in the house. If that food tastes as good as it smells it's no wonder Sirius doesn't want to be away from the cooking here. Lily thought as she found some clothes. She quickly made her was down the hall to the bathroom, took a quick shower, grinned when she realized she could get away with doing magic, and dried her hair.

She hurried down the stairs trying to find her way down to the kitchen. She stopped short when she saw James and his mother cooking what looked like pancakes, eggs, and bacon. They were working smoothly, as if they cooked together on a regular basis, and were talking softly to one another. Lily couldn't quite make out what they were saying, but she was nearly certain that she caught her own name once or twice. She looked around quickly, and deciding that she didn't want to be caught listening in on James and his mother, "Morning."

James spun around, knocking several eggs off the counter in the process, he flushed, "Morning."

Mrs. Potter gave her son a knowing grin, cleaned up the mess he had made with a wave of her wand, and said, "Good morning, dear. Why don't you go sit down, James and I were just about finished."

Lily sat on a stool by the counter, "I didn't know that you could cook."

Mrs. Potter smiled to herself, "Jimmy helps me cook whenever he's home. It was a chore to get him to help when he was younger, but he's grown to like it. Haven't you dear?" James, who by this time was beet red, mumbled something unintelligible. "Why don't you sit down too, I can finish up the rest by myself."

"Are you sure, mum?" James asked. Mrs. Potter waved her hand at him in response.

"Aw, who would have guessed, Jimmy Potter's a mama's boy." Lily laughed.

"Shut up." James mumbled.

"Don't worry; it'll be our little secret." Lily said. "Besides I think it's cute." James grinned down at his plate of food, "Anyway, where's your dad and Sirius?"

"Sirius apparated over to Remus' earlier, his mum wasn't feeling well, and dad," James glanced at his mother out of the corner of his eye, "had a meeting, he won't be back until tonight."

"I'm going to be heading out myself in a moment, Jimmy; I'm a little late for my appointment."

"Okay, mum." He stood up, kissed his mother on the cheek, "I'll see you later."

"Bye, Jimmy." Mrs. Potter said, then disapparated.

Lily watched the two of them with a small smile, she ruffled his hair when he sat back down, "You're really very adorable; you know that?" She set her fork down, "Is Remus' mum alright, she gets sick quite often, doesn't she?"

"Yeah, she's okay; she just gets sick a lot is all." James replied, and oddly enough it was Remus' mother who was sick this time. The full moon wasn't for another week and a half. Lily furrowed her brow. "So, what do you want to do today?" He asked desperate to get her attention away from Remus, he didn't want Lily paying too much attention to when Remus usually went missing.

A picture of her daydream from the night before flashed in her mind, and she flushed slightly, "I dunno. It's your house, so you can decide." She got up started to bring her plate over to the sink.

"Lily, you don't have to do that you know. I can clean it up with magic, it'll be quicker."

"What?" Lily asked, "Oh, force of habit I guess."

James waved his wand and all of the dirty dishes were clean and floating towards their designated spots in the cabinets. "Do you want to go ice skating?"

"Ice skating?" Lily asked.

"Yeah, there's a pond down in the village, I haven't been in ages. It'll be fun."

"Alright."

"Cool, you might have to pay, muggle money confuses me." James said rummaging through a drawer in the kitchen, "I wasn't particularly good in Muggle Studies."

"I didn't know that you took Muggle Studies." Lily said as James pulled some muggle money out.

"There we go. Yeah, mum and dad thought it would be a good idea. You talked to my dad, he's fascinated by muggles, and my mum thought it'd be a good idea for me to learn how other people live."

"Huh."

"What?" James asked.

Lily shook her head, "You learn something new everyday. I'm going to go grab my coat, I'll be right back." James watched her retreating back very confused.

"So, how are we getting down to this pond?" Lily asked stepping out of the house.

"We're going to have to walk I'm afraid. I somehow don't think that it'd be good for the two of us to fly down there on brooms."

Lily laughed, "No, I don't suppose it would be." They walked companionably for a few minutes before Lily spoke again. "You know when I was a kid I thought that witches had green skin, warts, and controlled flying monkeys." Then when James just looked at her added, "Or, if they were good witches, they looked like princesses."

"What's with your weird childhood obsession with monkeys?" He asked.

"What?"

"First I find out that you desperately wanted Sea Monkeys and now I find out that you thought that witches, well bad witches, controlled flying monkeys. Though I really don't know where you came up with that one. It's very strange, to say the least."

Lily pouted slightly, "I didn't have an obsession with monkeys. I wanted Sea Monkeys because the ads in the newspapers looked like fun. And the flying monkey thing is from a movie that's practically a requirement to see when you're a kid."

"What movie?" James asked.

"'The Wizard of Oz.'" Lily responded, "And the bad witch, the one with the green skin and warts, controlled flying monkeys, the good witch looked like a princess."

"Huh, so how did the good witch beat the bad one?" Lily looked up at him, "What? Of course the good witch is going to win."

Lily smiled, decided to make it simple and not go into the whole movie, and said, "Well, someone threw a bucket of water on her."

"A bucket of water?" James said confused.

"Yep, and she turned into a smoking pile of black robes, all while saying 'I'm melting, I'm melting.'"

"That sounds like a very strange movie." James said shaking his head.

Lily grinned, "You have no idea."

James led her to the pond, gave her the money, "We have to go rent skates and such, and I don't want to cause a scene with the money."

Lily shrugged, "Okay." They walked up to the counter with all of the ice skates told the clerk their sizes.

The elderly clerk slapped the skates on the counter, looked at James, "That'll be six pounds." When Lily stuck a hand into her pocket to pull the money out the clerk narrowed her eyes. "You're paying."

Lily looked at her surprised, "Yes."

The clerk shook her head, "Kids these days, just plain disrespectful. Now, in my day it would have been unheard of for a boy to make a girl pay when on a date."

James, looking embarrassed, grabbed the skates and went to find somewhere to sit down to put them on. Lily threw the money on the counter, "Yes, well, in your day it was quite alright for a man to hit a woman without being disrespectful, so excuse me if I don't take you particularly seriously." With that she turned on her heel and walked over to James. "What a miserable old cow."

James laughed, "Come on let's go ice skating."

It wasn't long before James realized that he was way out of his league when it came to ice skating. He was having trouble keeping himself from falling on his ass, while Lily skated gracefully around him. "How are you doing that?" He asked in amazement.

Lily grinned, "I took lessons for years before I started Hogwarts. Here come on, I'll help you." She skated in front of him, turned so that she was skating backwards and grabbed his hands. "Okay, first, stop looking down."

"Where am I supposed to look?"

She rolled her eyes, "Look at me." She smiled when his eyes met hers, "Good, now instead of trying to walk on the ice, glide. Push off with your foot, don't try to step down with it."

"Alright." James sounded skeptical, but he did as he was told. "Hey, I'm skating and not falling on my face."

Lily laughed, "Do you think you could try it on your own?"

James grinned at her, "I dunno if I'm ready. Maybe you should still hold on to one of my hands."

Lily rolled her eyes again, "I have this funny feeling that you're lying." But, she grabbed James' hand.

James was in heaven, he looked at Lily out of the corner of his eyes, and was ecstatic that he chose to go ice skating. Lily looked to be having the time of her life, her eyes were bright, her cheeks and nose pink. He was so preoccupied with Lily that he didn't notice the young teenage boy dart out in front of him. He let go of Lily's hand and tried to stop, but they hadn't gone over that part, so he wound up turning right into Lily. His hands flew out, grabbed her hips in a vain attempt to steady himself, but it was no use, even as he saw her eyes widen in surprise he could feel his feet going out from under him.

He wound up on his ass, Lily lying on top of him laughing hysterically. A couple of people stopped to see if they were okay, and as Lily seemed incapable of speaking, he waved them off. "I'm glad you think this is so funny."

"Oh, I do." Lily said taking a deep breath. "Come on, let's get up." Lily untangled herself from James, and got to her feet fairly quickly. James on the other hand had quite the difficult time of it.

Finally, out of breath, he managed to get himself to his feet. Lily was shaking and biting her lip to keep from laughing. "Okay, next time, we do something that I'm good at, and I can laugh while you make a fool of yourself, hopefully in front of lots of people."

Lily burst out laughing, looked up at James her eyes twinkling, "It's a deal." Just then the boy that had caused James to fall came skating by, and nudged Lily. She let out a startled, "Oh." Before grabbing on to James' neck, his arms automatically went around her waist. She pulled her head back, but didn't let go of him, "Thanks for catching me." She said breathily.

James looked down at her, "Any time." He had just started to lean down to her when he heard someone call their names. He groaned, "What are you doing here, Sirius?"

Sirius looked from Lily to James and back, "Am I interrupting anything?"

"No." The both said quickly, telling Sirius that he had, indeed, interrupted. "You're mum saw your note and sent me down to get the two of you. It's almost time for dinner."

The rest of the holiday had passed quickly for Lily, she was thankful that she had run into Sirius and the Potters on the Knight Bus. I don't know what I would have done if I was stuck at Hogwarts by myself. She looked around at the Great Hall and sighed, she wasn't quite ready to be back to school.

"What's up with you?" Marlie asked.

Lily shrugged, "I wish the holiday hadn't gone by so quickly."

"Tell me about it." Dorcas agreed. "It's always so depressing coming back here the first day. Though we do get tomorrow off which is a plus. I haven't done my potion's homework yet."

Emily laughed, "If it makes you feel better I haven't done my transfiguration homework yet."

Dorcas looked thoughtful for a second, "Yeah, it does. McGonagall is a lot stricter than Slughorn. She'd be more apt to kill you."

Emily shrugged, "I'll manage something before class on Thursday."'

"Hey, look, there's Ryan." Marlie whispered. The girls all glanced quickly over to the Ravenclaw table.

"He's coming over here." Alice murmured.

"Hey." Ryan said walking over to them. "How was your holiday?"

They all mumbled "Good."

"Marlie, you want to go for a walk?"

"Yeah, sure. I'll see you guys later."

"I've never seen her so into one guy before." Alice said thoughtfully. "Normally she gets bored in a month or two."

"Maybe he has something those other guys didn't." Emily replied.

"Yeah, like big…" Dorcas started.

"Dorcas Meadows, so help me god if you finish that sentence." Lily interrupted grinning.

"Hands, I was going to say hands." Dorcas laughed. "Is it my fault that someone's mind drifted so easily to naughty things?" Lily's eyes went blurry as her mind drifted to her daydream for a second, "Oh, my god, it did, didn't it."

"Oh, shove off." Lily said pushing Dorcas.

"So, have you guys heard the one about a guy being as big as the tip of his index finger to the base of his thumb?" Emily asked.

"Huh." Dorcas said looking, as Emily and Lily were, at Alice.

"Why are you all looking at me for?" Alice asked.

"You're the only one here who's had sex before." Emily replied.

"So, index finger to thumb or no?" Dorcas asked a very red faced Alice, while holding up her own hand.

"It's not true." Lily shivered at the voice in her ear. She had been looking at Alice and hadn't noticed James sit down next to her.

She turned, looked up at him and had to fight to keep her eyes from drifting to his hands, "No?"

"Nope. That's much too small." He grabbed a French fry off her plate and in doing so got the attention of the other girls.

"Is it really now?" Lily asked with an eyebrow raised.

"Yep, I could show you if wanted." Emily coughed, looked at Alice and Dorcas, she wasn't sure who was more surprised when Lily didn't hex James on the spot.

"Don't be sleazy." Lily said getting up from the table, "Besides, I don't think a demonstration is necessary, I've just eaten after all, and I'd really rather keep it down."

"I'm sure that's what he wants right now too." Dorcas murmured to Alice, both girls snickered as they followed Lily out the door.

James jogged up to them, "Hey, Lily, does that mean some other time when you haven't eaten."

Lily glanced up at him, "Maybe." She said patting his cheek. "Don't…"

But she never got a chance to finish her sentence, because James had grabbed her wrist and pulled her close to him. "I'll show you mine, if you show me yours."

Lily knew, intellectually, that it was probably one of the most distasteful and corny things a guy had ever said to her, but she just couldn't find the ability to form words at the moment. James was looking at her with something she couldn't quite place in his eyes, and it had her mouth going dry.

"James, where'd you get off to?" Sirius said coming out of the Great Hall with Remus, Peter, and Gideon. He rolled his eyes when he spotted them, "Will you two lay off for a little while?"

James dropped Lily's arm, she took a step back, "I'll see you tomorrow." He said and walked towards his friends.

Alice, Dorcas, and Emily stared at Lily wide eyed for a moment. "What the hell was that?" Dorcas asked.

"Er…" But Lily didn't know how to explain it.

Sensing Lily's discomfort Emily stepped in, "Please tell me he didn't say what I think I heard him say to you, Lil."

"What did he say?" Alice asked. Lily smiled at her; the time at Emily's house over the Christmas holiday seemed to have been good for her.

"He said, and I quote, 'I'll show you mine, if you show me yours.'" Emily answered.

Alice and Dorcas burst out laughing, "No, he didn't." Then seeing the look on Lily's face continued, "Yes, he did." That caused them all to start giggling.

"That has got to be one of the cheesiest things I've ever heard. I'm surprised you didn't kick him in those balls he was so keen on showing you Lily." Dorcas said

Lily waved her hand, "He was just being retarded."

"That wouldn't have stopped you last year." Alice said. Lily shrugged.

"Huh, well this is certainly interesting." Dorcas decided. "Come on Alice, we have to go discuss this new development."

Lily rolled her eyes, then slowed down a bit. "Em, I've got to tell you something."

"Does it have to do with James?"

"Yeah."

"I thought so. You've been acting differently with him lately, especially after your jaunt to his house."

"I fancy him."

"Well, no kidding. What am I blind?"

"No, I mean, I really fancy him." Lily stopped, kicked the wall, "Bloody hell, I'm half way in love with him."

Emily watched her for a moment, "Seriously?"

"Seriously. I've always thought he was good looking, who doesn't really." Emily nodded her head in agreement, "And he was always nice to us and I liked that side of him, it was just his asshole side that kept me from ever really considering him as a boyfriend. And now he's not being an asshole. He's nice, and sweet, and thoughtful, and kind, and fun, and, and he loves his mum."

"What?" Emily asked slightly confused.

"He absolutely adores his mum. When I was at his house, you could see it just walking into the room, the bond that they have. It's adorable. Bugger it; I'm even daydreaming about him."

Emily lifted her eyebrows, "What kind of daydreams? Cute little ones, where you're married with twelve kids, or naughty ones where you…"

"Shut it." Lily said turning red, she hadn't meant to share that little bit of information.

Emily laughed, "It was the naughty ones wasn't it." Lily glared at her and she sighed, "Lily, I'm your best mate, yeah?" She waited for Lily to nod, "Okay, this is what you're going to do. You're going to stop being miserable, and you're going to enjoy it. It's nice that you have something like this with everything that's going on out there. And the next time James asks you out, say yes; then go off and get married and have your twelve kids."

"What if he doesn't ask? He hasn't asked me out once this year."

"Lily, he's been in love with you for a year and a half, you're the only one who didn't notice. He's going to ask, just be patient. And if he doesn't, well, he's a coward, so ask him."

Lily smiled, hugged Emily, "Thanks."

"No problem, that's what I'm here for."

"So, twelve kids?"

"Yep, you're going to be shagging none stop, so you're going to have lots of kids, one of whom better be named after me. Anyway, after kid number twelve is born you and James'll finally learn and start using a contraception charm."

Lily laughed, "So, something good to look forward to then, lots of kids and lots of sex. Puffapod." Lily said to the Fat Lady. "And I promise that I'll name my first born girl after you." Lily said climbing the girl's staircase.

"Who said anything about girl? I think the oldest kid should be Emily. Sure he might hate you, but he'll get over it after about fifty years or so."

Remus and Sirius who were playing chess in the common room looked at one another. "Girls are very strange sometimes." Sirius said shaking his head.

Remus nodded his head in agreement, then had one of his pieces move and said, "Check."

Sirius stared down at the chess board for a minute then smiled, called for one of his bishops to move, "Checkmate."

"Well shit." Remus muttered.

Lily pulled her cloak tighter around her, she was freezing! Stupid January Quidditch matches. She thought darkly, not that she would miss one, especially not one that Gryffindor was playing in, even if it was freezing and the air smelled like it was going to start pouring any second. She cheered when James scored another goal; they were up by a hundred and sixty. She whished desperately for someone to catch the snitch, and as they were up by enough, she didn't care who.

She groaned as Ravenclaw scored twice on them, watched as James yelled angrily at the keeper. Unfortunately, his shouts had distracted the Gryffindor seeker as well, and by the time the girl noticed the Ravenclaw seeker chasing after the snitch Lily knew it was too late. She put her head in her hands and shook her head as the Ravenclaws cheered. "Bloody hell, we lost by ten points." Remus said wide eyed, "Ten, bloody, points."

"Well, that certainly sucks a bit doesn't it?" Alice said descending the stairs.

"At least it wasn't by a lot; we're still in the running for the cup. Thank Merlin we really flattened Hufflepuff. We just have to hope that Slytherin beats Ravenclaw." Gideon said.

"Yeah." Peter said nodding his head.

"I think that this might be a first." Marlie added. When the others looked at her questioningly she continued, "Gryffindors hoping that Slytherin wins at something."

"You're probably right." Alice agreed.

"Oy, guys!" Called a voice from behind them. They turned to see Sirius, no longer in his Qudditch robes, dash up to them. He panted a little, "Sorry, I'm a little out of breath. Lily, James wanted to know if you'd wait for him."

Lily felt her face burn, thank Merlin it's cold enough that I can blame it on that. "Yeah, okay. Where is he?" She asked peering around.

"Still in the locker room. I think he might be trying to drown himself in the showers."

Lily shook her head and turned back. Boys, she thought, they take games way too seriously. "James? James, are you in here?" Lily called opening the door to the locker room.

"I can't believe we lost." He was lying on the bench his arm tossed over his eyes.

Lily sat by his knees, "At least it wasn't by a lot. There's still a good chance that we can win the cup. Slytherin just has to beat Ravenclaw, and we have to beat Slytherin."

James sat up, peered at Lily for a moment, "Since when do you follow Quidditch so closely."

The words, 'Since you've been playing.' Nearly popped out of her mouth, but she recovered quickly and shrugged. "I heard Gideon telling everyone."

James nodded grabbed his school uniform, and stepped into a changing area, "It's true, Slytherin is pretty good, so I don't doubt that they'll beat Ravenclaw, but we're going to have to beat them by at least a hundred points. We'll have to wait to see how much they beat Ravenclaw by."

He stepped out, fully dressed, and was fastening his cloak around him, "Don't worry, I have faith in you." Lily said looking up at him.

James stopped what he was doing and looked at her. He placed his hand on her cheek, rubbed his thumb across her cheekbone. "Thanks."

Lily swallowed; her breath was becoming shallow, "No problem." She whispered breathily.

James sat down next to her, moved his hand slowly behind her neck. Lily's breath hitched, and she looked at James through half closed eyes; he was leaning closer, she tilted her head, closed her eyes the rest of the way.

"Potter! Potter, are you still in here?"

Lily heard James groan as her eyes flew open, James' eyes were open and on hers, he hadn't pulled back. "Yes, Professor." She shivered as she felt his breath on her lips. His eyes never left hers.

"Good, the Headmaster would like…" Professor McGonagall came around the corner, stopped short at the sight of them. "Evans? What is going on here?" She asked with narrowed eyes.

"Nothing Professor, Lily had something in her eye, I was helping her get it out." He let go of her neck, sat up straight.

McGonagall eyed them suspiciously, but as she hadn't, technically, caught them doing anything, she couldn't do anything. "Well then, if you're done." She said tartly, "The Headmaster would like to see you." She turned, but stopped before she left, "And do teach Morgan to pay better attention during matches, Potter. I've grown rather used to having the Quidditch cup in my office."

Lily stared at the door, "Did she really just say that?"

"McGonagall is really into Quidditch." James said smiling; he held out his hand, "I'll walk you back up to the castle."

They walked back up to the school hand in hand, in companionable silence. They had just gotten to the grand staircase when James stopped suddenly. "Lily I wanted to, er, ask you something." He said very quickly.

Lily swallowed; he was going to ask her now! "Yeah?"

"I was wondering, if, er, you wanted to…" He sputtered.

"If I wanted to what?" She asked feeling butterflies dancing around in her stomach.

"If you wanted to," He stopped, looked at her, "tutormeinpotions."

Lily blinked, that hadn't sounded like 'Go with me to Hogsmead.' "What?"

James took a deep breath, "Could you, er, tutor me in potions?"

Lily felt the butterflies turn to lead in her belly, "Potions?"

"Yeah. I'm, er, falling behind."

Lily could feel the tears forming in her eyes, "Oh, er, yeah, sure." She was determined not to cry in front of him, "I've got to go. I've, er, got to go get ready to patrol." She walked quickly away, careful not to run until he was out of eyesight. James watched her go and sadly made his way to Dumbledore's office, mentally kicking himself the whole time.

Lily's eyes were blurred and she didn't notice anyone when she rounded a corner. She bumped solidly into someone, who grabbed her arms to keep her from falling. She closed her eyes, tried to regain her composure, "Sorry." She mumbled.

"No, problem. But try to slow down, Lily; I'll have to take points off next time."

Lily looked into the smiling face of Jason Fitzgerald. She forced a smile, "Sorry for running into you like that, Jason."

"Don't worry about it. I'm in too good a mood; that was a great match wasn't it?"

Lily fought the need to roll her eyes, her team had lost. "Yeah." She muttered.

Her thoughts drifted back to James, why hadn't he asked her out? She heard Jason say something about looking for her, "Why?" She asked absently.

We almost kissed, if it hadn't been for McGonagall we would have. Something about the next Hogsmead visit being in two weeks, "Yeah."

So, what? It wasn't the first time either; he almost kissed me that day we went ice skating too. "Yeah." She said again. She watched Jason's face light up. What did I just agree to?

"Yeah, brilliant. I'll meet you in the Entrance Hall before we leave then." He said grinning.

She gave him a weak smile as he bounded up the stairs that headed towards the Ravenclaw common room. She pushed a hand to her stomach, "I feel sick." Then the tears did come, she walked miserably the rest of the way back to the common room. She trudged up to her dorm.

"What did James want?" Marlie asked grinning; Sirius had told them that James was planning to ask her out.

Lily didn't answer; just flopped, face first, on to her bed. Marlie glanced at Alice, Dorcas, and Emily. "Lily?"

Lily rolled over, stared at the top of her bed, "I hate boys."

"So are you going for girls now? 'Cause you're seriously going to disappoint a large portion of the student population." Alice asked.

"The girls? 'Cause I'm pretty sure the guys'll be more into her." Dorcas said grinning.

Lily sniffed, they all took a good look at her face, "Lily, honey, what's wrong?" Marlie asked sitting on Lily's bed.

"I'm so stupid!" Lily wailed, throwing her arms around Marlie and sobbing.

They all blinked, this was not normal Lily behavior, she never cried like this over guys. "Jesus," Emily said, "what did James do?"

"Nothing, he didn't do anything." Lily spit out through sobs.

"Lil, he had to have done something to get you acting like this." Alice insisted.

Lily stopped sobbing, and wiped the tears viciously off her cheeks. "The bloody bastard asked me to tutor him in potions."

"Tutor him in potions?" Dorcas asked confused. "Is that code for 'go to Hogsmead with me?'"

"No." Lily said dejectedly, "And after we almost snogged in the locker room, we were about this close." Lily said holding her index finger and thumb less than a centimeter apart. "And then McGonagall walked in, so we didn't. And when we got back here he said he wanted to ask me something, so I thought he was finally going to ask me out. And then he didn't."

"Oh, honey, I'm sorry." Dorcas said patting her arm.

"That's when I did the really stupid thing."

"What did you do?" Alice asked.

"I ran into Jason Fitzgerald, the Head Boy, and I'm pretty sure I agreed to go to Hogsmead with him."

Emily blinked, "Pretty sure? Isn't that something you usually know for sure?"

"I was upset and I wasn't paying attention to what he was saying, I was thinking about James. And, and, and, I don't want to go." Lily wailed throwing herself back down on the bed.

The next two weeks were awful for Lily, at breakfast the first day after what she had taken to calling 'the incident' her eyes had locked with James'. He looked so dejected that it had taken everything she had not to throw herself into his arms on the spot. After that she done her best to avoid James, and considering that they were in all the same classes, and in the same house, it was surprisingly easy. In fact, the ease in which she was avoiding him gave her the sneaking suspicion that he was avoiding her as well.

Lily woke up the morning of her date with Jason Fitzgerald more miserable than she had been in the entire two weeks preceding it. She dressed mechanically, sighing every few minutes. "Lily, you don't have to go." Dorcas said.

"I've told you guys, I'm not going to do that to him. I may not have been paying attention at the time, but I did agree to go. I'll tell him that I don't think it's a good idea for us to go out when we get back. He'd be terribly embarrassed otherwise." She was looking at herself in the mirror and didn't see the look that passed between Dorcas and Emily. "I'm going to brush my teeth; I'll be done in a second."

While Lily was in the bathroom Dorcas slipped out the door, "Make sure it's a good one." Emily said.

Drocas grinned, "Oh, it will be."

Lily came out a minute later looking as resolute as a soldier who knew he was heading to his death. "Where's Dorcas?"

"She was starving, so she ran down to breakfast."

"Okay." Lily said suspiciously. They got to the bottom of the stairs just in time to see James being pulled down by Remus and Sirius, with Gideon behind, pushing him.

They all stopped short when they saw each other. "Guys, I'm just going to stay in the room today." James said, ducking under Gideon's arm and going back up the stairs.

Tears filled Lily's eyes, "I'm going to go to breakfast." She said as she scurried out of the common room, Emily close behind, calling to her.

"Well, that was awkward." Gideon murmured.

"No shit, Sherlock." Sirius said back. When the other boys stared at him he said, "What? Lily taught it too me."

Emily caught up to Lily in the Entrance Hall where they ran into Dorcas. "How's it going?" She asked.

Dorcas grinned at her, "Brilliantly."

Emily met her stare, "Good."

"What's going on? What are the two of you up to?" Lily asked looking from one to the other.

"Nothing." Emily replied. "Isn't it almost time for you to meet Jason? Do you want us to wait with you?"

Lily looked down at her watch, sighed; guess I won't be having breakfast today. "No, I'll just wait here."

"Okay. Well, we'll see you in Hogsmead then." Dorcas said pulling Emily out the door, Filch eying them warily.

Twenty minutes later Lily was seriously annoyed, but she decided to give Jason ten more minutes. After the ten minutes were up Lily stormed up the stairs, where she ran into Jason coming down the stairs. "Oh, so you're coming down now?"

Jason blinked at her, "Yeah, so?"

Lily sputtered, "SO? SO? YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO MEET ME HALF AN HOUR AGO! YOU ARE SUCH AN ASSHOLE!" She yelled then stamped the rest of the way up to the common room. When she got to her room, she took a deep breath; I didn't want to go anyway. Then getting an idea, she grabbed her potions books and went to settle her thing with James right then.

She walked straight to the sixth year boy's dorm ignoring the looks she was getting from the other boys, and walked right in. James who was lying on his bed, his pillow covering his face called, "Go away Padfoot, for the last time, I'm not going." Lily slammed the door shut, walked over to him and dropped her books onto his stomach.

She got a vicious pleasure from his grunt of pain. "What the hell? Lily? Why are you up here? What's all this?"

Lily paced back and forth as James got off the bed, "It's my things for potions. That is what you wanted me to do isn't it, teach you potions."

"Er." But James didn't know what to say, he'd never seen Lily like this before. She walked to him, shoved his chest hard enough to have him stumbling back several steps. His eyes narrowed dangerously. "You're going to want to stop hitting me."

Lily's fists balled, "Oh yeah?"

"Yeah." James replied, "Why aren't you at Hogsmead with your boyfriend."

Lily slapped James upside the head, "He didn't show, and he's not my boyfriend. I didn't even want to go with him anyway."

James grabbed her wrists, jerked her towards him, forcing her to look up to keep eye contact, "I told you to stop hitting me."

"What are you going to do about it?" Lily challenged sticking her chin out. Lily knew it was a bad idea to challenge James like this, but she was getting a dark pleasure out of watching him loose control. It's got to be sick. She thought.

James' hazel eyes flashed as he roughly pinned her up against the wall. She struggled, but found she couldn't move, "Let me go." She hissed.

"No."

"Let me go."

James pulled her hands above her head, trapped them there with one of his own, "No."

Lily felt her pulse pounding, saw James' in his throat, "Let me go." But the conviction was no longer there.

James was staring at her with dangerously dark eyes, "I warned you Lily." He didn't give her a chance to reply as his lips descended on her neck.

Lily wanted to push him away, wanted to do any number of things, she really did, but found she didn't have the strength. She did, however, tilt her head, instinctively, to give him better access to her neck, and moan as he nipped lightly, then not so lightly along her collarbone.

James' free hand traveled from her waist to the top of her shirt, where he slowly undid the buttons. With the buttons undone James pushed Lily's shirt open, his hand found its way back to her waist, where it rested for a moment, right below her ribs. His hand felt gloriously cool against her rapidly heating skin. The hand inched torturously slow up her side; Lily moaned and arched her back when he cupped her, when his thumb brushed her nipple.

Lily's breath was coming in short shallow bursts as he switched to the other side of her neck, to her other breast. James let go of Lily's wrists using his free hand to balance himself on the wall and nudged his knee between Lily's thighs. She made a guttural noise in her throat and buried her hands in his hair, bringing his head to her chest. She gasped when he nipped at her through her bra.

"Hey, Prongs, I forgot my cloak, are you sure you don't wan…" The door opened and Remus stared wide eyed at the pair of them for a moment, "Holy shit, sorry." Then slammed the door closed again.

James looked down at Lily, her eyes were closed, her face flushed, her lips were parted slightly as air rushed between them. And she was trembling. He shook his head in disgust, he put his hands on either side of her heated face, watched her eyes open slowly, "Merlin, Lily, I'm so…"

"Don't." Lily murmured, "Please, don't.

He dropped his hands immediately, stepped back, sat on his bed. "I know what I did was inexcusable, but…"

"Stop." Lily said firmly, James' eyes darted to her as she quickly did up the buttons to her blouse. "Don't apologize for kissing me.

"Kissing you? I didn't kiss you, I" James paused trying to find the right word, ravaged Lily thought, "attacked you."

Lily smiled, took James' face in both of hers, "No, you didn't."

"I forced myself on you. I should be sent to Azkaban."

"I could have stopped you."

"How? I'm a lot stronger than you are."

Lily dropped her hands, she knew she wasn't getting through to him, "All I had to do was say, 'no', but I didn't want to, I didn't want you to stop, because I wanted it as much as you did."

"Lily, I took advantage of you at the very least."

Lily sighed, climbed onto James' lap, and wrapped her arms around his neck, "Okay, fine, so next time, you're pissed and not thinking straight, I'll take advantage of you. Then we'll be even."

James laughed, put his hands on her waist, "It's a deal." Lily smiled and squirmed off his lap and out of his reach, "You know we never did get around to that proper kiss."

"No, we didn't, did we?" She asked picking up her books and straightening her clothes.

"And I'm not thinking particularly straight, so maybe you could take advantage of me now?"

"Are you pissed?" Lily asked with an eyebrow raised.

"Not particularly."

"Well, then, I'm sorry, I can't help you. You have to be both before I can properly take advantage of you." Lily giggled and slipped out the door as James groaned. He was in desperate need of a very long, very cold, shower.