August 9th 1892: Christine
Sitting in the coach on my way home I couldn´t help thinking that I didn´t like lying to Erik any better than lying to my children. There was no appointment at the hairdresser´s. I had refused to come with my former teacher because the possibilities frightened me. What if he had tried to do something indecent? What if I had tried to do something indecent?
It had been just the same with the handkerchief. I couldn´t have cared less whether Philippe carried one around with him. I had simply needed an excuse to pull my fingers out of Erik´s grasp. My hand had been terribly sweaty; he couldn´t have seriously wanted to kiss it. Besides, allowing him to greet me like that was impossible. Maybe he´d have tried a kiss on the cheek next time, and after that…
I forbade myself to finish the thought, noticing that my palms had grown sweaty again, which had nothing to do with the weather. Wiping them at my dress and focusing on the street and the people outside the coach I realised how close we already were to our home. Just a few minutes later we turned around a corner, and I saw someone carrying two large suitcases. At once I knew what this meant. "Raoul!", I called cheerfully, waving.
The man turned around, and his face split into a broad smile. "Christine!", he exclaimed. Hastily he put the suitcases on the ground to wave as well. I could hardly wait for the coach to reach its destination. As soon as it stopped I jumped out and ran to my husband, who was hurrying toward me. We met halfway between the coach and the house. Raoul wrapped his arms around me and crushed me to his chest.
"I missed you so much, my darling.", he muttered into my hair. His breath tickled my skin, making me giggle softly. "I missed you, too.", I whispered. Looking up at him I pressed my lips against his. It was only then that I realised how much I had indeed missed him, his gentleness, his smile, his scent. Everything was so wonderfully familiar, as if her had never been gone.
When the kiss ended I asked: "Why are you already here? I thought you couldn´t be back until the evening.". "I left Oslo as soon as I could.", he explained. "My business partners weren´t too pleased, but I told them I had to spend as much time as possible with my son. After all, I missed his birthday. Where is he?" I felt him straighten up, probably glancing over my shoulder to see whether Philippe was also emerging from the coach.
Involuntarily I took a step backwards, letting go of him. My joy about having him at my side again had completely disappeared. Admittedly I had been aware that I´d have to tell him about the fact that our son had a private teacher. After all, he´d have been bound to notice that both children were leaving the house in the morning. But I had been hoping against hope I´d have a little more time to prepare myself.
Yet now that Raoul had asked, there was no going back. I cleared my throat. "Philippe is not here.", I said. "Erm… Why don´t we go inside and discuss everything over a cup of tea?" Actually I had no idea how tea would help me get over this. I was just repeating what people in books always did in difficult situations. Besides, I was afraid that one of us could have an emotional outburst in the street.
"What is it, Christine?", he wanted to know. "You´ve grown so pale, and your hands are trembling. Has something bad happened to Philippe? Is he ill? Or has he… no, that´s impossible… Please tell me what´s going on!" His voice had become more urgent with every word. Now he was staring at me wide-eyed. "It´s nothing like that.", I assured him, patting his arm awkwardly. "I´ve… found a teacher for the boy. Today is his first day. I´ve just brought him to the teacher´s house. He´ll be back in the afternoon."
I could practically see the tension vanish from my husband´s body. "Oh…", he made, giving me a tentative smile. "That´s good… very good… Is it one of those we had spoken to before my departure?" "No.", I replied. "It´s someone Antoinette Giry has recommended to me. He has an excellent reputation." I made a mental note to talk to Mme.Giry soon, just in case… "Well, if she likes him, I´m sure he´s a good teacher.", Raoul said, shrugging. It seemed that he was so glad that nothing bad had happened to Philippe that he´d have approved of anything. Inwardly I sighed in relief as he seized my hand and we made our way to the house, oblivious to the suitcases still standing where Raoul had left them.
Yet apparently it had been too early to rejoice. "There´s a part of your behaviour I don´t understand.", he told me, coming to a halt at the door. "If Philippe is all right, why were you so upset when I asked about him?" That was indeed a good question. It took me a few moments to find a suitable reply. "You reminded me of another subject, a less pleasant one.", I answered. "Some days ago I had to… dismiss Marielle. It happened on Philippe´s birthday, that´s why it came to my mind when you asked me."
I opened the door and went inside, giving Raoul time to take in what I had just said. After all, it wasn´t exactly common for me to dismiss a maid who had worked for us for years without as much as sending him a note. I didn´t have to wait long for his questions. "Why did you do that? I always assumed you liked Marielle. You picked her yourself. What has been going on? Did you catch her maltreat the children?" Anger welled up in his handsome face. He looked as if he was about to track down the former maid and maltreat her as well if she had done anything to out children.
Again I could make him calm down. "She had been stealing.", I informed him. "Or rather, she had been about to steal. I found out that her brother is a criminal and she has passed on details about our household. She had even given him a key to out back door. Oh, we have to exchange the lock there!" Glancing up at him nervously I asked: "Did I act correctly? Or should I have waited for you to come home?".
He shook his head. "I´d have done the same.", he said. "What would have been the point in waiting? I´ll have the lock exchanged today, then you don´t have to worry anymore." I beamed at him. For some reason I didn´t feel the slightest bit of a guilty conscience. It would have been different if Marielle hadn´t done anything wrong. Yet since I had simply not accused her of the right crime, I could justify my behaviour.
"Now that we´ve sorted out those problems you could tell me a little more about Philippe´s teacher.", Raoul suggested. The sparkle of curiosity in his eyes was something that both children had inherited from him. Usually I approved of it, but now it could have even been dangerous for me. "There isn´t… erm… that much… I could… well, tell you…", I stammered. "You could start with simple pieces of information.", he tried to help me. "What is his name? Where does he live? How long has he been a teacher? Where does Mme.Giry know him from?"
I looked around, frantically searching for someone of something to distract him with. I hated the thought of lying to my husband about so many things. At last an idea formed in my head. I reached up and cupped his face tenderly. Giving him a soft kiss on the cheek I whispered: "Can´t we forget Philippe and his teacher for a while? Come upstairs with me! Then I´ll show you an advantage of both our children not being at home…".
Slowly a smile lit up his face. "I think I´d like that.", he told me. I noticed that his voice had grown slightly husky, and a tingling sensation spread through my body. He picked me up from the floor as if I wasn´t heavier than a feather and carried me up the stairs to the bedroom. Minutes later every unpleasant thought had vanished not only from his mind.
Author´s note: I have bad news for you: I´ll be on holiday till March 7th. But I´ll come back full of inspiration because I´ll see POTO. So don´t forget this story!