"Gently," Lois admonished Clark. "Don't go driving over the bumps in the road like a speed demon. I'm carrying precious cargo." She patted the basket carved from a watermelon that held assorted fruit.

The Kent family reunion was only an hour from Smallville. Most Kents never left the Kansas farm land.

"I'm being careful. The watermelon basket is a nice idea but I'm warning you now, it's not going to impress Aunt Bertha and Aunt Myrtle."

"What was I supposed to do, Clark? You said they're professional taste testers and they can recognize anyone's cooking after they've had it once. They recognize yours. Anyone I got to cook for me that they didn't recognize would have to do it every year from now on. I couldn't bring something store-bought or something I cooked by combining ingredients because we know how that would have turned out. This was the only option I had and I can truthfully say I made it."

"I know."

"Hey, Clark, how about breaking down?"

"I had to go to your family reunion and if we feigned breaking down, someone would try to help us. Maybe even someone on their way to the reunion."

"Stupid Samaritans," Lois muttered. "Hey, Smallville, how do you know you're at a redneck family reunion?"

"I don't know."

"When you go to pick up girls."

"Funny but I wouldn't recommend telling that joke at the reunion."

"They don't have a sense of humor? I think it is legal to marry your 3rd cousin."

"In my opinion, if you know you're related, you're too close."

"At least you don't have to worry about accidentally dating a cousin."

"Because I'm getting married to you?"

"Well, that and you're not related by blood to anyone on Earth."

"Except for Kara."

"You know what I mean."

"We're here."

"No," Lois whined uncharacteristically. "I was expecting your mother to come along for some support. I don't want to go now."

"She had to work. I exaggerated when I told you about my family. Just pretend they're all copies of Jonathan and Martha Kent."

"That's creepy," she said but she got out and they headed for the white building.

"Back in the 1800s this used to be a church but they outgrew the building and moved down the road. Then around the early 1900s, it was converted into a schoolhouse and it served as a school until the 1950s. Then a bigger school had to be built. Now the town just rents it out for events. The Kents have been having their reunion here every year at least since I was a kid. I remember when I used to play on those swings, climb on those logs that fence in the property, and walk down to the river with a group of kids. Some of the adults go down there to fish, so they watched us."

"Thanks for the history lesson, Mr. Kent."

"Commit it to memory. There'll be a pop quiz tomorrow."

Lois set the basket down at the end of one of the many tables. They must have been the last ones to arrive. Lois saw 2 old ladies going around, sampling all the food. One was a heavyset woman with pepper gray hair piled high on her head. The other was a skinny redhead, whose wrinkles made it apparent that it was not her natural hair color. Clark told her the gray-haired lady was Bertha and Myrtle was the redhead. She anxiously watched the 2 women make their way down the table.

When they got to her basket, they frowned and Bertha asked, "Who made this?"

"I did," Lois answered. "I wasn't aware they were supposed to be labeled."

They weren't amused by her humor. "I assume you're Clark's fiancée," Myrtle said. "When you fix food for a reunion, it should be homemade, not a sculpture, dear."

Lois was about to say something not so polite in reply but Clark put an arm reassuringly around her and she remembered it was his family and just nodded. Bertha and Myrtle declared it was time to eat and everyone began to pile food on their plates. There was another room for eating in.

"If I didn't know this used to be a school," Lois said to Clark, as they sat down with their food. "I'd wonder why there's a chalkboard in the eating room and think that the Kents needed a diagram to show them how to eat."

A mother with her 2 little children sat across from them and she looked a little mad at the remark.

"I'm sorry," Lois apologized. "I'm about to become a Kent myself, so the joke was pointed at me too."

Lois took a bite out of her apple and it made a loud crunching noise in the now silent room.

"We haven't said grace," Clark whispered.

"What?" Lois whispered back.

"All of the family prays together," he told her.

Lois looked around the room. Everyone was looking at her. "Sorry, I didn't know."

"Clyde, can you lead the prayer please," Bertha asked.

"Thank you for this bounty, Lord and thank you for those who can't cook but do their best and for those who forget to say grace. We are grateful for family and this time we get to spend together. Amen."

Lois rolled her eyes and stabbed her fork into the macaroni. She had a feeling she was the 'those who can't cook' and 'those who forget'.

After the meal was over, she said to Clark, "I have to admit I wasn't too pleased with the homemade rule. I thought why not just have everyone chip in for some chicken at KFC but I like the rule now."

"I'm glad," Clark smiled. "So what do you want to do now? Go find relatives to talk to, so they can pinch my cheeks and tell me how much I've grown?"

"Sounds tempting but not really. If we were kids, I'd suggest swinging, balancing on the logs, going to the river to walk off the food, and then coming back to eat more. That's the way to spend a reunion."

"Then let's do it. I'm game."

"Are you serious? They'll think we're a few cards short of a full deck. They already think so highly of me."

"Since when do you care what people think?"

"Good point. Let the fun begin."

They swung until some kids came out and wanted a turn. They tightrope walked on the logs. Then they walked down to the river, where they sat on the shore and soaked their feet in the water.

"I have to admit your family reunion is much better," Lois said.

"Only because we're hardly spending any time with them."

"Exactly."

The old man, who had led the prayer and had heard them talking, walked over and sat beside them, "I'm Clark's great uncle Clyde," he told Lois. "So I guess I'm your uncle too now. You know my wife was just like you at these reunions. She never could cook worth a lick or do anything domestic. They eventually started treating her like a family member, a black sheep family member, but a Kent all the same."

"That's reassuring I guess. I bet you miss her."

"Not really. I'll see her as soon as I leave the reunion. She avoids the reunion like the plague when she can," he laughed, as he got up and walked off. Although he must have been in his 80s, he moved like he was in his 30s. If he owned a farm like a lot of the Kents, it probably kept him in shape.

"Okay, I like you, I like your mother, and I like your Uncle Clyde. That's enough, right?"

"He is quite a character. He's rich and sharp as a tack, even if he doesn't look it."

"Rich? Doing what?"

"Well, he studied to be a lawyer but he never practiced. He got rich solely from farming and being tight."

"I suppose we should head on back before they start to miss us."

When they got back, there was a group standing around and whispering but they stopped as soon as they saw Lois.

"The subject of that conversation isn't obvious at all," Lois said sarcastically to Clark. "You know I'd rather have someone tell me to my face that they don't like me than have them talking about me behind my back and pretending they do."

"I guess it's the difference in the way we were raised but I'd rather people spare your feelings and not be rude. Do you want to leave? We've done our duty."

"Yeah. I guess we'd better go get the watermelon basket first."

"Don't worry about it. There's no fancy dish to take back. Bertha and Myrtle have a race to see who can get the most leftovers in their cars."

"Who went and made them queens? Everyone should take home the food they brought but I guess it's less of hassle."

"So do you still want to marry me?" Clark asked, once they were in the car.

"I suppose but I hate family reunions, especially when it's an in-law reunion."

"I've got the perfect solution. How about next year we start our own family reunion, just the 2 of us?"

"Sounds good to me."

The End