A/N: Hey everyone! I've been really nervous about writing this chapter, because I've never written anything Remus and Tonks and I love that pairing and don't want to mess it up. So keep that in mind as you read it! R+R!!!! Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter!

Ch 7:Moving Into Grimmauld Place

As she lied in her bed late at night, she remembered all of the reasons why she had to go and find him. He meant everything to her, and it hurt knowing he could be hurting. He could be all alone somewhere with only his grief and his pride. Very suicidal company. She had to find him. Even if he tried to pull his "noble routine", thinking that leaving her is the only way to
protect her. He never understood that to her, he was perfect. To her, life with him is the only thing she wants in life. Life without him gives her no reason to even live. To her, the fact that he was a werewolf doesn't matter.

To her, letting someone take care of you only proves that you are strong. To her, he is the love of her life, and she needed to help him. It was just hard to make all of this make sense. Everything happened so fast. He made her feel something so much stronger then anything she ever felt before. And it hurt to remember everything they went through. But at the same time, it made her feel really happy to know she finally found someone who truly loved her. If only that someone could would let himself be loved in return.

::::

"He's gone." An old raspy voice echoed in her head.

Nymphadora Tonks shifted positions in the lumpy, scratchy mattress. What? Who's gone? She turned her head and felt a sharp stab of pain in her neck. What's going on? Tonks opened her eyes.

The room was painfully bright. Tonks rubbed her eyes and reached to feel her pink spikes, but instead felt her long mousy brown hair. She felt like she was asleep for hours. Actually, she felt like she was just trampled by a centaur. What happened? And where was she? She tried sitting up.

"Ooh!" She moaned.

"Easy there." The same raspy voice said coming from her left side. She felt two hands on her back lifting her up. But she couldn't turn her head to look at the person. She could hardly move. Slowly, she turned her head to see an old and weary Alastor Moody looking at her nervously. She noticed the door way behind him and saw a healer walk past the room. She
was in St. Mungo's. Something bad happened.

"Wh-what happened Moody?"

"We battled the Death Eaters in the Department of Mysteries, Tonks. To save Harry and his friends. Don't you remember?" Moody said stiffly, getting up from his chair with a grunt and started pacing to room.

What happened yesterday? Or was it a month ago. Nothing was making sense.

"When did this happen? How long—" she asked.

"Almost two months ago. Today is August 11th, you've been out quite a while—hit by Bellatrix and fell. Just a few broken ribs, oh and some muscles were torn in your neck, but they've
straitened most of it out." Now it was coming back to her. They we at the Order meeting, when Snape sent them a message saying Harry and his friends all left the school for the
Department of Mysteries because they thought Sirius was there. They flew to the Department of Mysteries and then were pulled into battle.

"Moody, who's…gone?" Tonks asked, her throat tightening up and dreading the answer.

Moody stopped at the window and sighed. He kept his back to her, as if not wanting to see the look on her face when he told her.

"Maybe I shouldn't be the one to tell you this."

"No, Alastor, please!" Tonks insisted, breathing quickly and getting anxious.

"It's Sirius."

::::

After one long week, Tonks stood at the window in her room at St. Mungo's. Her faced mixed up with concentration; she was frantically trying to change the color of her hair. Frustrated and determined, she was trying so hard—actually a little too hard—to change it to any color but her natural brown, that she once turned her head completely bald.

"Come on!" Tonks shouted and let out a groan of frustration as her brown locks quickly grew down to her ankles. She tried again, and her hair only was shortened into a floppy boyish cut. "No!" Tonks screamed and kicked the wall furiously. "Ow…" Tonks let out a shaky breathe and leaned against the wall, gripping on the windowsill. Everything around her was blurry and
spinning. She swayed and slowly lowered herself to the floor and sat against the wall.

"Sirius." She said and let out a sob. She just met Sirius when the Order was organized and he was the only cool member of her family that wasn't a Death Eater and didn't go insane. She just got to know him, they just became close friends and now he was dead.

A tear rolled down her cheek just as she heard footsteps in the corridor. She stood up, holding on to the window sill for support and wiped her face dry just as Molly Weasley walked in her room.

"Oh Tonks! Dear, are you ok? Sorry if I was interrupting, how silly of me. I should have known you would want to be alone after—well… you know." Molly said, looking flustered.

"No Molly, it's alright. I'm great. You don't have to wor—"

"Nonsense. Tonks, you aren't that good of a liar, you know. Just let us help out a bit." Molly looked around the room disapprovingly. "And we can start by getting you out of this miserable filthy room! Honestly, do these people think people will get well in this place? Now…"

"Mrs. Weasley! I'm ok here. I only have a few more days, I leave after the full moon actually, and then I'll be off to my own place again." Tonks instantly regretted saying that as soon as the words came out of her mouth. She what was coming next. An invitation.

"Your own place?" Mrs. Weasley began, as predicted. "That won't do! You can't be there all by yourself!"

"Mrs. Weasley, I'm a grown woman, I'll survive on my own." Tonks insisted.

"I know, I know. Of course you'll survive on your own dear, just you'll be lonely, thinking of Sirius and everything. It'll be hard for you."

Well, I have been dreading going home… all alone with my mind going crazy. But she couldn't take Mrs. Weasley up on something like that.

"And, my apologies, but it's not really a secret that you aren't the greatest cook." Mrs. Weasley said smiling. Tonks let out a polite stiff laugh. "Please, let us take you in. Come live at the Burrow. Trust me, we've got room, now that the twins are in Diagon Alley with their silly joke shop."

"Thank you very much, but I can't… I couldn't be a bother to you all, you've done enough for me." Tonks said, meaning it very much. But mostly, she couldn't bear being "taken care of" again. She hasn't been "taken care of" since before she went to Hogwarts. And even then, she didn't like not being her own person and not being independent. Besides being raised, no one has opted to take care of her at all. No one has put her before themselves or pampered her or anything. No one has ever loved her like that. Certainly no guy has. She's had relationships, but not meaningful ones. She might have been kind of in love, but it was never mutual.

"Don't be silly, it wouldn't be any problem."

"But I can't, Mrs. Weasley. I have to get back on my feet—on my own. I'd feel like I was intruding." Tonks said.

"I understand." Mrs. Weasley said, looking a little disappointed. "But do me a favor and let someone help you."

Tonks was quiet.

"Maybe I will."

"I mean, if not with us at the Burrow, I suppose you could always live at Grimmauld Place." She said.

"What? But that's Sirius's—" Tonks started confused.

"No, Sirius gave everything there to Harry and Harry's decided to let the Order continue using it. And you are part of the Order, so it'll be no problem for you to stay there." Mrs. Weasley said.

"But why do you suggest that? I'll still be on my own, won't I?"

Mrs. Weasley grinned wide.

"What?"

"Remus Lupin is living there too. You won't be alone at all." She smiled, her eyes sparkling with excitement.

Living with Remus? I'm going to live with Remus? Well, she had always been fond of Remus. They were pretty good friends. She certainly wouldn't mind living there. With Remus.

"Well, Mrs. Weasley, I guess that'll be good for me." Tonks paused, noting the eager look on her face. Does she think something would happen between them? That's weird. After she constantly tries to fix me up with Bill… Well, there's definitely something charming about him. But nothing would happen between us. We're just friends. "Alright. I'll move in to Grimmauld Place."

"Splendid!" Mrs. Weasley exclaimed. "I'll go see if you can be released early!" And she practically skipped out the door.

Tonks smiled to herself. That'll be good. Moving into Grimmauld Place.

Feeling calm and more relaxed, Tonks took a deep breath and tried morphing her hair again. Her hair turned a warm, comforting blonde shade and fell past her shoulders. It worked. And for the first time in weeks, Tonks was excited.

"No, Alastor, this is something I have to do. You know that." Tonks insisted, frustrated.

"Tonks, not now. The Order is supposed to be ready to follow any lead that comes in and with Christmas in two weeks, it'd be better that we can go through it without another death to worry about." Moody said.

"Moody, I not going to get myself killed." Tonks promised, trying to shake off the fact that Christmas was coming.

"You better not! After all I taught you about constant vigilance!" Mad-eye exclaimed, his magical eye spinning spasmodically in its socket. "All in all, it's better if you didn't go. The Order doesn't need to be worried about yet another thing, especially with Christmas—."

"That's enough with bloody Christmas!!!" Tonks yelled, unaware of a few fellow Order members watching them argue in the gloomy meeting room of Grimmauld Place. Her fists clenched. She tucked a strand of her mousy miserable brown hair behind her ear and closed her eyes, trying to control her emotions right now. She fought back the tear threatening to be noticed and put a hand on a chair for support. All of this talk of Christmas and traditions and mistletoe when Remus is out somewhere all alone and could be hurt. "Honestly! Remus could be de--."She stopped. Her bottom lip trembled. She took a deep breath. "He could be… hurt… or worse. And nobody here gives a damn about him!"

"You don't even know where to find him!" Moody said, in a cautious, careful tone.

"So? It doesn't help his case that I'm the only one here who cares enough to try and find him! After all the work he's done for the Order! After he's been a friend to all of you—" Tonks shouted, acknowledging Mr. and Mrs. Weasley, Professor McGonagall, and Hagrid who were there for the meeting they were supposed to be having. "—since before I was born! This is how you repay him? By ignoring the fact that he exists?" Tonks shouted, letting out the anger that built up through all of the stress she was under.

No one said anything. Tonks never let out many signs of frustration in front of the Order, let alone an outburst like this. Kingsley Shacklebolt apparated in the room, looking somewhat concerned when he saw the crowd of Order members around a distressed Tonks.

"So if you won't try and help me find Remus or even pretend to care about him, don't you dare try to get in my way!" Tonks threatened, a few sobs escaping her.

"We do care about Remus, dear--" Mrs. Weasley spoke up.

"But not enough to try and save his life." Tonks said coldly, wiping tears from her face and walking out of the room.

"Tonks wait! I know where he is!" Kingsley called after her.

But she had already disapparated.

I'm going to find him. Tonks thought as she apparated right outside Hogwarts grounds. She began walking towards the school. I just don't know where.