Here's the update guys. Merry Christmas, or a belated one or something (can't really be sure with the time difference and all).

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Chapter 4:

The Lesson Plan

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A day after Seto shared his problem with Yugi, Malik, and Bakura; he summoned the three once more, this time with their darker sides to his mansion. Currently, they were all gathered in one of Seto's guest rooms, seated around an expensive-looking table as a couple of servants served them tea and cookies.

Yami Bakura raised an eyebrow at the tray of chocolate chips, "Never thought you'd be one for these tea parties Kaiba…" he said dubiously.

Beside him, Yami Malik grabbed a piece and bit into it, "Yeah, you're being nice. I don't like it."

The others remained silent and only looked at their host, silently agreeing with the two dark spirits. Yes, Seto was indeed acting a bit strange. As soon as all three pairs of lights and darks have arrived, Seto had basically swept them in his arms, employing probably half of his household staff to make sure they were comfortable and such. Even stranger was that he seemed to be delaying the main point of their visit, something very unKaiba-like. They've spent the first hour in the mansion being pampered by Seto's servants, and gifted with sweets and little gestures of kindness. It was apparent to everyone that these were probably what could be called as "peace offerings" and that Kaiba was going to tell them something very bad indeed.

"Uh, ahem, well…just making sure you're all comfortable before we start," Seto said nervously. He offered Ryou a tray of creampuffs. "Go on, help yourself."

Ryou's eyes brightened as Seto offered him his favorite snack and extended a hand to grab one, "Oh! Well…don't mind if I—"

"ALRIGHT, I'VE HAD IT!" Malik suddenly shouted, rising up and bringing his fists down the surface of the table. "Kaiba, if you called us here to say something about our little pretending game, then JUST COME OUT AND SAY IT!"

Seto gulped inwardly before regaining himself. Can't let anyone see him slip after all.

"Alright then," he said in a tone of finality, "Straight to the point. I've found someone who can most probably help us with the plan. You see, I am completely aware that none of you know how to act, well…gay, so I sought out someone who'd be able to help you—"

"Oh, finally! I've been waiting for hours!" A voice cried out. All eyes snapped to the door where a tall white-haired man had burst in through. "Oh, Kaiba-boy, I thought you would never get around to telling them!"

Malik, as well as his dark stared in slight confusion at the man, the lighter side wondering why the new arrival seemed so familiar.On the other hand, Yugi and his dark half, along with Ryou, stared at the man in shock and shouted in unison, "WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?"

Yami Bakura narrowed his eyes at the man, "Haven't I killed you before?"

Ryou snapped his eyes to his other self, "WHAT?"

"Him," Yami Bakura said, "I remember taking his eye out after Yugi won that last duel in Duelist Kingdom, after that I left him for dead. Never knew he lived," he shrugged carelessly.

"You took his eye out," Ryou repeated numbly.

Yami Yugi, who'd been listening to this rather informative conversation of the two Bakuras turned his attention back towards the white-haired man when Ryou started demanding why Yami Bakura hadn't informed him of this little venture of his.
He suddenly felt someone tapping his shoulder and so turned around to see Malik and Yami Malik giving him a questioning look.

"Who's he?" Malik asked, "I think I've seen him somewhere…"

"You don't recognize him? He's—"

The topic of their little discussion, probably overhearing them, jumped in front of Malik, making said boy back up a bit, and said in a hurt voice, "Oh, don't you know me? I know you two."

Malik blinked, unsure as to how to react. Yami Malik, who was beside him, raised an eyebrow at the man.

"Can't say we do…" he said, and then his face formed a thoughtful expression, "Unless…"his eyes narrowed, "Do you, by any chance, go to the bar three blocks from Domino Museum?"

"A bar?" the man frowned, "I'm sorry, no. I never have the time to do so."

"Oh…" Yami Malik said softly, "Heh, I thought you were one of Lightside's admirers."

Everybody's attention was called by the seemingly trivial sentence.

Bakura gave Malik a look, "Admirers?"

"Hehe," Malik laughed nervously in an attempt to wave it off, "He doesn't have any idea as to what he's talking about. Admirers, pfft…"

"Oh…gained a bunch of fan girls haven't you?" Yami Bakura smirked.

Ryou looked at Yami Bakura, "But he's a man," he said, referring to the other white-haired individual in the room besides them.

"Oh, Lightside has some fan boys too. Some stalkers those little bugs are…" Yami Malik shook his head in a pitying sort of way, "He has me throw them off sometimes when we're walking home from the bar."

This got the said light quite a few stares.

"ALRIGHT!" Malik shouted hurriedly before his dark side could embarrass him further, "We're straying from the topic," he turned to face the man, "Now, tell us, who the hell are you?"

Thankfully, the man entertained his question, thus driving all the other's attention back to where it was supposed to be.

"Maximillion Pegasus, head of Industrial Illusions, and inventor of Duel Monsters. I hosted the Tournament held on Duelist Kingdom—"

"Which I won," Yami Yugi nodded.

"—yes, well, it's similar to Battle City—"

"Which I won…again."

"Hey, I deserve some credit too you know," Yugi piped up, a bit dejectedly.

"Sorry, Yugi."

Yami Malik growled and muttered something to his light side, "I would've won if it weren't for you picking the worst of times to be selfless and all goody."

Malik gave an indignant huff. "Well—!"

"Ahem, anyways…yes, Battle City, that's how I know you two. You gave us all quite a show, with all those darkness and hatred stuff. Amazing. I wish I had you two in my Tournament, the fans always love an antagonist...and all those angsty pasts and such; a bonus those are—"

"Okay, okay, we get it," Yami Bakura cut in through Pegasus' rambling, quite frankly tired of him praising the Egyptian pair about being a great villain, "So, why are you here anyways? I doubt you're here for Kaiba's tea party…"

"A tea party? Oh no, not at all," Pegasus shook his head, "Kaiba-boy here, called me some time ago and said that you boys needed someone to teach you how you should act for Mr. Dream's party, and since I don't really have anything better to do, I agreed to do this little favor for him."

A stunned silence reigned for a moment.

Surprisingly, it was Ryou who first spoke, "Y-You're going to teach us…how to act gay?"

Pegasus smiled.

All of the lights and darks snapped their heads towards Seto. Yugi, and Ryou, along with their darks had wide unbelieving eyes. Malik and his dark however, not really knowing Pegasus as well as the others, simply looked surprised.

Yami Malik leaned towards Malik's ear, "I told you he was going to hire someone."

Yami Yugi was looking at Seto as if he was crazy. In truth, Seto couldn't blame him, he himself was starting to question his sanity for bringing Pegasus out of all people into their little predicament.

"Kaiba," the former pharaoh said, "If you think, for even one second, that I'm—" he breathed, then, "WHAT THE HELL WERE YOU THINKING BRINGING PEGASUS INTO THIS?"

Yugi gripped his partner's arm and gave it a small squeeze, "Calm down," he whispered.

Yami Yugi visibly relaxed but his eyes still bore a hole in Seto's head.

Pegasus gave him a pitiful look, "Oh, Yugi-boy—or the other Yugi boy, if you prefer. I thought we were in good terms now?"

"We are. But I'm about as keen to having you as our…'trainer' as I am to having Malik or Bakura's dark sides as m-my bed-buddy!"

Yami Malik and Yami Bakura blinked.

"What was that suppose to mean?" Yami Bakura said.

"Uh…I don't really know…" Ryou said, he himself staring at Yami Yugi dubiously.

"Oh, come on," Seto said irritably, rising up. He was frankly getting tired of all this. Can't the others just accept his choice of a 'tutor'? They were just wasting time with all these squabbles and arguments when they could be starting right now with the preparations for his plan. "I probably have the highest IQ in this whole room—"

Yami Yugi opened his mouth to speak but Seto gave him a pointed look, saying, "Don't you dare contradict me."

He closed his mouth.

"And I think that none of you can equal me when it comes to things like this. I'm willing to bet my whole company that not one of your rotten brain cells could come with anyone other than Pegasus who can be a better help in this situation when I myself could not."

The whole room was silent in the course of Seto's short speech. Pegasus was wondering if he should feel proud that Seto thought he was the best man for the 'job' or not, considering what said job actually was.

"What about Otogi?" Yugi sad timidly.

Seto glared at him and said, "We want you to act gay not girly."

"Ah…"

He pinned the others under his gaze, "Any other objections?"

When no one spoke for the next ten seconds, Seto straightened up. "Well, now that we have that settled, let's move on," he nodded to Pegasus, "As I've made it clear, Pegasus is to be your 'trainer' of a sort in the field of…gayness—" they all stared at him—"and other than that, I'm going to teach you all the proper mannerisms you are to observe while in Dream's presence. He's sure to be expecting all of you to be gentlemen or something, and since you're obviously nothing of the sort, I'm willing to take it upon myself to make sure you don't disappoint him."

Yami Bakura's eyes were glazed, "Mannerisms? What the hell?"

Seto looked at him, "Carlos Dream is a wealthy man, and wealthy men, like yours truly, do not really hold credibility to someone who behaves beneath the level of their expectations. I don't even know how I can stand being with some of you, actually."

"Fine, fine, no need to get nasty."

"Anyways, be here tomorrow. Same time, same place. We'll start our preparations then, and don't be late."

There were a few nods all around the room.

Seto smiled, "Alright then. Well…feel free to go anytime now."

They simultaneously rose up from their seats and made their way to the door.

"Oh, wait," Pegasus suddenly said, "Here, I made our lesson plan, you could look over it when you have time" he smiled and started handing out a bunch of folders to all of them.

Kaiba looked at Pegasus with a mixed expression of disbelief and wonder, "You made a lesson plan?"

"Oh, Kaiba-boy, you honestly can't expect me to sit around and do nothing all day, so I decided to do something productive. Here, I made one for you too."

As Seto took the folder, not without caution, the others were already reading its contents.

There was a collective silence as they scanned a few pages.

It was Yami Malik who said what all of them were thinking; "What the freaking hell is this?"

Seto, who hasn't opened his folder yet, finally flipped through some of the papers. His eyebrow rose higher and higher as he read.

I. Appearances
-should you go for FEMININE or MASCULINE?

II. Behavior
-what to DO and NOT DO

III. Seduction
-get his COMPLETE attention
(over 100 creative, original, and unpredictable attention-grabbing ways)

IV. Relationships
-see if you've got what it takes to DOMINATE or if not, see how you'd do if you decided to be SUBMISSIVE in your relationship
-how to make them WORK
(make that straight guy you've got your eyes on question his sexual preference)

And on and on it went. Seto stared at Pegasus and looked at the others who had expressions akin to horror in their faces.

"Um…this is all so…eh," Yugi said unsurely, trying to get out what was in his mind without sounding too freaked out about Pegasus' enthusiasm.

"We're not planning on being gay for the rest of our lives you know!" Malik cried out brandishing the papers in front of Pegasus' face.

"Oh, don't take it that way, Malik-boy!"

Malik visibly cringed at being addressed like this.

"What better way to make Mr. Dream believe you're all homosexuals than by understanding, and thinking like one, eh? Just make sure that it's still pretending alright?" he winked.

Malik glared at him for a few seconds before, stomping out of the room, the others staring after him.

"DARKSIDE, WE'RE GOING HOME. GET DOWN HERE!" they heard him call after several seconds.

Yami Malik sighed and gave the others an almost apologetic look. A smirk was present in his face as he said, "He's very sensitive," before walking out himself.

"Well…wasn't that interesting?" Yami Bakura said.

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Hope it was alright for you guys. I basically had the lesson plan thing strike me on-the-spot so it wasn't that well-thought out. Heh, I honestly just came out with all of it out of the blue.

I am, however, open for suggestions for the lessons which will start in the next chapter.

Comments are of course, welcome too.