Disclaimer: Okay, let's think about this. If I did happen to OWN Harry Potter… Sirius would not be dead. Same for Dumbledore. We would know more about James and Lily than we do. Harry wouldn't have dumped Ginny in that stupid, typical, generic Hero-way. I would actually have money… the list goes on and on…

BEST FRIEND'S GIRL

Chapter Two: Unrequited

"Potter!" Lily screeched, livid. Her emerald eyes were glowering at him, her dark red hair was flying furiously, and steam was practically flying out of her now bright pink ears. All of this was in reaction to James's latest stunt.

The moment that Lily and Marlene had entered the Great Hall, they had been greeted by an enormous, floating, heart-shaped balloon with the name Lily printed on it in huge letters. A discreet wave of Potter's wand, and, in a deep baritone that was most certainly not Potter's, came a revoltingly written song that most certainly was.

"Lily, Oh Lily

Most girls are so frilly

So stupid and silly

But you, my dear,

Are brilliant and clear,

An angelic goddess

Among banshees and hags

I say this because I love you

Really, not just for a shag

Lily, I love you

Lily I do

Believe me, my flower

What I say is TRUUUUEEE!

So what do you say?

Go out with meeee todaaaay

M'lady, My Lily

My GIIIIRRRRLLLLL!!"

After that lovely chorus, the balloon exploded, showereing Lily and Marlene in glitter and confetti.

"Why would you do this to me?" Lily asked miserably.

"Do what to you?" James replied innocently.

"POTTER!" Lily yelled, "You've just completely humiliated me!"

"Humiliated-but…" James frowned, bewildered.

"Yes, humiliated! God, Potter, I don't know what I've done to make you hate me so much!" She shook her head, glitter and tinsel falling out of her now-frizzy red curls.

"Hate you?" James yelled, "Bloody hell, Evans, of course I don't hate you! I lo-"

"Ha!" Lily laughed coldly, "You do not love me, James Potter. You don't even know me anymore." She paused for a minute, and hesitated before adding, "And I will never love you."

She turned on her heal, and before stomping up the stairs, she looked back for just a split second- long enough to see James's face collapse in sadness.

"Never say never, Evans," He called out his old familiar line to her retreating back, but even as he said the words, he was losing hope.

Later that night, the two sixth year Gryffindor dormitories were buzzing with conversation, heated debates, confessions, plans, and two very different individuals- James Potter and Lily Evans. That night was pivotal, though no one would suspect it. It was more or less a normal evening, except for one detail- Lily was crying.

All four inhabitants of the girl's dormitory were crowded onto one single bed. The first, Lily, was lying face down on the bed, her tears staining her pillow and matting her hair to her face.

Well, matting the small amount of hair that was not being brushed and braided by the second girl. Emmeline Vance loved hair- playing with it, styling it- if she hadn't been a witch, she always said, she would have been a hairdresser. Emmeline's own hair was long, straight, dark brown, and very boring. That was why she usually exercised her hairdressing skills on her four best friends.

Her favorite subject was Dorcus Meadowes, who was classically beautiful, and who had the best hair in the school. It was waist length, blonde, and soft, falling down her back in shimmering waves. Her brown eyes were a bit dull in shade, but lit up easily with a smile or a laugh. Dory had never had a serious boyfriend. Neither had Lily, of course, but that was mainly because by the time she was allowed to date, James had taken up the hobby of scaring away all potential suitors. Dorcus simply had a short attention span. She very rarely went out with the same boy more than once, but not because she was slutty- she just quickly lost interest in one guy after another. Because of this habit, her beauty, and her lack of attention to school work; she could have been a female Sirius Black.

The last girl was treating Lily to one of her favorite luxuries- a back massage. If Lily did bother to speak between sobs, she would usually croak something like, "Potter…so stupid… Marly, a little to the left…"

Marlene McKinnon was famous for her back massages. She had magic hands, people liked to joke. Marly was also famous for her hiccups. She got them at least twice a day, and they weren't ordinary hiccups- they were loud and obnoxious. Marlene's hiccups had been compared to a calling bird, a croaking frog, a screaming midget, and finally dubbed as "purely Marly." Conveniently, Marlene also had a certain talent for transfiguration, and whenever someone came up with a new animal simile, she would transform them into whatever animal they had compared her to. Marlene's last claim to fame was one that was much less envied, and only discussed behind closed doors in hushed whispers, with the constant use of the phrases, 'poor thing' and 'could have been any of us… could be us next…' Death Eaters had just murdered Marlene's parents along with her boyfriend, some of the first murders of the war.

Marlene had a bit of a temper, but no other girl at Hogwarts could match the wrath of Lily Evans. After Lily got a hold of herself, the girls would have to listen to her rant.

She sat up, wiping tears out of her glowing green eyes. Lily's best friends groaned inwardly in anticipation- they knew what was coming. Lily cried very rarely, and when she did, it was usually out of humiliation of anger. It was also usually followed by a very angry raving rant- hey; you know what they say about redheads and their tempers.

Lily took a deep breath, and Marlene quickly let of her shoulders, which were only getting tenser by the second. Emmeline dropped her now elegantly French braided and tinsel-free hair. Dorcus stopped talking. Lily's speech was about to begin, as it always did, with one, angry word.

"Potter," Lily growled, gritting her teeth. "Stupid, moronic, arrogant Potter."

"Lily," Emmeline said, a bit timidly, "Lily, maybe you ought to- maybe- maybe James didn't mean to upset you?"

In response to this, Lily released a cold, ridiculing laugh that was most un-Lily-like. "Oh, yes, of course. Saint Potter would never, ever, ever PURPOSELY upset me."

"No," Marlene insisted, rolling her eyes, "He really wouldn't."

Lily was startled by her friends' sudden betrayal. "It is James Potter's primary goal in life to upset me!" She cried, half furious and half confused.

"No…" Marlene said slowly, as if speaking to a two-year-old. "It is James Potter's primary goal in life to get you to go out with him." all three of Lily's former best friends giggled in agreement until they were silenced by Lily's glares.

"She's right, you know," Dorcas grinned, "Lucky."

"I am not lucky." Lily shouted, throwing a pillow at Dorcus. "As if I want Potter stalking me!"

"Well," Dorcas giggled, "I would!"

"I don't understand why you hate him so much," Emmeline mused, "He's a pretty nice guy."

"Okay," Lily sighed, frustrated. "Can we please stop with the Potter-love fest? If you all think he's so great, than why don't one of you ask him out? Because let me assure you, I don't want him! At all!"

Then, something amazing happened- all four of the girls were silent. Dorcas was first to speak.

"Are you sure?" She frowned, "All he wants is a date, Lils. Maybe you ought to give him a chance?"

"What?" Lily snapped, caught-off guard. Had Potter slipped love potion in her friends' pumpkin juice, or something?

"C'mon, Lily, he just wants you to go out on a date with him. It's not as if he's asked you to marry him." Emmeline reasoned.

Lily smirked at her friend. "You wanna bet?"

"I'm sure he was kidding, Lily." She sighed.

"I wouldn't be." Lily insisted.

"He's not so bad," Marlene laughed. "I stayed with his family-" she paused, and then swallowed somewhat difficultly. "Um, this summer, I stayed with his family. He's all right, Lily. Hot, too." She seemed to have relaxed a bit at this point, and smiled. "After he gets out of the shower… with his shirt off…"

"He really likes you." Emmeline said wistfully, for she wasn't the most lusted after creature. "It's romantic."

"If Potter really likes me, then why would he pull a stunt like that? It's obvious that I would never fall for that kind of thing!"

They all considered this, but it was Marlene who answered.

"Well," she reasoned, "it is Sirius giving him all of his you-advice. He doesn't seem to understand that you and that Catherine Davenport aren't the same. He's a bit thick, you know." She grinned. Sirius was a childhood friend of Marlene's, but they hadn't spoken much recently.

Lily rolled her eyes, clearly exasperated. "But that doesn't change the fact that Potter is an arrogant, bullying, idiotic player!"

"He only shows off around, you because he likes you!" Emmeline pointed out, matter-of-factly.

"Fine, bullying, idiotic player, then."

"He doesn't ever hex anyone anymore." Dorcus countered.

Lily glared at her. "Idiotic."

"He's one of the best in our year!" Marlene objected indignantly. "He even beat me in our Transfiguration exams last term!" Marlene almost took that comment personally- she always made sure that she knew exactly how well she had done and who had done better.

Lily sighed, and then presented the final insult, the one that she was absolutely sure they couldn't argue with. "Player," she said simply, smirking.

To her complete and utter shock, frustration, and horror, they all busted out laughing.

"What?!" she cried.

"He hasn't been out with anyone in months!" Marlene gasped between giggles.

"I actually asked him to Hogsmeade last week," Dorcus laughed, "Just to see what he'd say, y'know? He didn't even consider. I'm not sure he looked at me once he realized I wasn't Lily, actually. I even flipped my hair, right in his face- nothing. Not a glance. I think you'll have to realize, Lily, that you two are perfect for each other, because otherwise he'll have to either kill himself or join the monastery which, in my opinion, are more or less the same thing."

"WOULD YOU STOP?" Lily screeched, her voice filled with pure rage, "I DON'T LIKE POTTER, AND DESPITE WHAT HIS STUPID, CHILDISH DELUSIONS HAVE LED HIM TO BELIEVE, I NEVER WILL! HE'S AN- AN- YOU KNOW WHAT, HE'S AN ASS! THERE, YOU GOT ME TO CURSE. HAPPY? I CAN'T STAND HIM, I CERTAINLY DON'T FANCY HIM! I HAVE ABSOLUTELY NO IDEA WHY I EVER DID! I LIKE REMUS!"

That was what it took for complete silence to pass over the room.

---

In the boy's dormitory, however, the conversation was just beginning.

"Okay, mate," Sirius frowned, pacing in front of James' bed, where the rejected and deeply depressed seventeen-year-old was sprawled lifelessly, staring up at the ceiling. After glancing at his friend, somewhat concerned, Sirius continued. "Damage control time- back to the drawing board. What's the plan?"

James shook his head and released a cold, bitter laugh- the first signs of being alive that he had shown in hours. Finally, he spoke. "Sirius, did you not hear her back there?"

"Yeah?" Sirius frowned, apparently confused as to the question's point.

"Uh, are you sure? 'You don't love me, James Potter, you don't even know me anymore'." He quoted, still staring at the ceiling emptily.

"Exactly." Sirius sighed, exasperated, "You don't know her!"

"What d'you mean?" James cried, sitting up. "I was friends her for four years!"

Sirius frowned. "Oh. I'd forgotten about that." He paused, apparently stumped, and then he smiled. "Anymore."

"What?" James snapped irritably.

"Anymore. As in, 'you don't know me anymore'. That's what she said. It's not that you didn't know her to begin with- you don't know her anymore. She's changed." Sirius smirked, apparently under the impression that he had just said something incredibly insightful and brilliant.

James didn't seem to think so. "Obviously, Padfoot, she's changed since she was fourteen years old." He rolled his eyes, unimpressed. "What's your point?"

"My point, my dear Prongs, is that you don't know the new Lily."

"Okay…"

"So… get to know her!" Sirius explained slowly.

"Elaborate, please?" James asked impatiently.

"Look, mate," Sirius looked down at his feet, as if he was about to say something embarrassing, "I admit it… I was wrong about our fair lady Lily. She is more than I gave her credit for, and it's obvious that those er- grand gestures- aren't her style. And she probably wants you to like her for the real her that she is now, not the her that she was two years ago. So, get to know her!" Sirius grinned, obviously pleased with himself and his little speech. James, however, was yet to be convinced.

"Sirius, that… it's a good idea, and everything, it really is. Surprisingly so, actually, especially coming from you. Only… how exactly do you suggest I do that when Evans won't allow me within ten feet of her?"

Sirius didn't even pause. Apparently he had thought out this plan fairly well in the five minutes that had passed since he came up with it. "You send someone else to get to know her for you."

"Padfoot," for the first time all night, James laughed sincerely, "No offense, but I doubt Evans likes you much more than she likes me."

"Merlin, James, how thick are you?" Sirius grinned. "I meant Moony."

Up until this point, Remus had been desperately trying to tune out this conversation, as he usually did when the subject of Lily came up. Remus hated it, listening to his two best friends discuss her, plot and scheme about how they would win her over. He hated James' long, elaborate declarations of love for Lily, because Remus was faintly certain that whatever James felt for her, he felt it too, twice over. He hated Sirius' occasional speeches about how Lily was 'just a girl' and 'not worth this', because she was worth it. She was more worth it than any one in the world, and Remus couldn't stand anyone questioning her worthiness. More than anything, though, Remus hated talks like this- the crazy, ridiculous schemes that James and Sirius would come up with to get Lily. This was because, unfortunately, something told him that someday one of these stupid plans would be just crazy enough to work. It was that depressing though that kept Remus from butting in, offering advice, or even trying to craftily discourage James from pursuing Lily. It was fate, he was almost sure of it, and you didn't mess with fate, no matter how much you wanted to. But at the mention of his name, he forced himself to look up from the book that he had been trying to concentrate on.

"What?" He cried, "Sirius, come on!"

"You come on, Rem! Prongs here has been… how can I put this delicately…obsessed with the Fair Lady Evans for years now, and he still hasn't gotten her to go out with him! I'd say it's time for some major restrategy."

"I agree," Remus said with difficulty, "But why does it have to be me?"

Yes, he thought, why?

"Well," James reasoned, "Basically it's you, Sirius, or Wormtail. She basically hates Sirius as much as she hates me, and I reckon she finds Peter a bit disgusting." He grinned. "So who's left?"

Remus groaned, "But what do you want me to do, anyway?"

"You know… Get to know her for me. Be her friend; get on the inside, that sort of thing. Maybe put in a good word for me now and then."

"Wait." Remus tried to hide the anguish from his face, "So you want me to pretend to be friends with Lily?"

"Pretend?!" James cried, outraged. "Why in the bloody hell would you have to pretend anything? Lily Evans is the most beautiful, smart, funny, nice, and altogether lovely person we know? She's a great friend- I would know, wouldn't I? And you should count yourself lucky to have a good excuse to befriend her!"

Remus pondered these words for a moment. Lily was all of those things, which was precisely why Remus did not want to be her friend- He wanted, desperately, to be so much more. He wasn't sure he could bear to be around Lily constantly, to confide in her, to care about her, without being with her. But… still. James had been his best friend since first year. He hadn't rejected him for being a werewolf- it had been James' idea to become animagi. He had always been a much better friend than Remus deserved.

"Well?" James pleaded, "Please, Remmy? This could be my last chance mate. I mean," he hesitated. "You heard her back there."

Remus looked at his friend. James was miserable, and Remus could help him…even if it meant putting aside his feelings for the only girl he had ever loved…

"Okay," he agreed, "I'll do it." As James rejoiced, Remus flopped back down on his bed and silently groaned. He was pretty sure that those four words would cause him more heartbreak than any others he had ever spoken.