I'm so cold right now. My eyes slowly flutter open and I let the surroundings sink it. I'm in the hospital hooked up to machines. I'm alone. I don't remember what happened. Why I'm here, how I got here.. that all seems blurry. The last thing I remembered was being cold outside. I don't think I've ever felt as horrible as I feel now. My head hurts, my body aches, I'm tired but I can't sleep. I'm lying here looking around the room. It's sort of scary. I've never really been in a hospital. I mean I have.. I've just never been the person in the hospital bed. It's weird. I'm alone. I hate being alone. I've been alone for so long and I just.. I need someone. I need my husband. I want Chandler. I want my friends and family. I'm tired of being alone. I hate Alex. I hate him for taking me away from my home, my friends, my family, my life. I hate him for everything he's done to me. For all the bruises he has caused, physically and emotionally. I hate him, but this is my fault. Tears fill my eyes. This is my fault. It's my fault I'm here. I decided to go to New York. I decided to be selfish and see my friends when I should have been with my husband. The tears fall down my cheeks and I can't stop them as much as I want to. I hate myself. I did this to myself. I need to accept that, and stop blaming Alex. I knew I hurt Chandler when I told him I was going to New York. I deserved everything that has happened. Probably more. Karma. The door slowly opens and I turn away. I don't want to know who it is. With my luck it's probably Alex. I close my eyes. I feel a gentle touch on my cheek and a kiss on my forehead which forces my eyes to open. I turn my head and meet the face I've been waiting for. The face that has kept me going this entire time. That face. I love that face, I miss that face. A small smile spreads across my face. "It's you." I whisper.
"It's me?" He gives out a small smile. "It's you." A huge smile spreads across his face and he sets a paper cup onto the stand beside me and pulls up a chair. He takes my hand and kisses it. He is staring at me. He isn't saying anything. Maybe I should say something, but what do I say? Oh my god I don't know what to say to him. I've had 6 months to think about what I wanted to say to Chandler when I saw him again. What do I say? What if he hates me? Maybe he's working up the courage to say he's in love with someone else and wants to get a divorce but he hasn't been able to do that cause he couldn't find me. I watch tears fill his eyes. He kisses my hand again. Ok this is killing me he needs to say something. He has to. The tears spill out of his eyes and rolls down his cheeks.
"What's wrong?" My voice is scratched and feels weird.
He shakes his head more tears rolling down his cheeks. "I just.. never thought I'd see you again. I was just taking in those beautiful eyes. Those eyes I've missed so much. And your beautiful face.." He says kissing my hand once again. I love that. I love his kisses. "God... how much I missed that beautiful face."
"I never thought I'd see you again." I smile and now I'm crying. Great.
"I missed you so much. So much. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I promise I'll make it up to you. I'm so sorry, I love you so much. You are everything to me and I'm so sorry." More tears are spilling out of his eyes. His beautiful blue eyes. What is he sorry for? He didn't do anything. This is my fault.
"Why are you sorry? I'm sorry. It's my fault. Not yours." I can barely say. I deserved everything I got.
"No. No! This is my fault! If I was a better husband, if I had gone with you, if I listened to you, you wouldn't be here! This is my fault. I just.." He began to cry even more. He let go of my hand and covered his face. I've never seen him like this, I've seen him cry but never like this. "I'm the worst husband." He whispered.
"You're an amazing husband, and trust me this is not your fault. It's mine." How can he blame himself for this? How can he say that? He had nothing to do with this. It was my fault. "Please don't blame yourself for this."
"What happened? Who did this? Cause I will kill whoever did this to..." I can see him getting mad, really mad. I've never seen these emotions from him before.
"Lets not talk about this now." I force a smile and take his hand. "I'm just happy to see you."
He wipes the tears from his eyes and looks back up at me. "I'm incredibly happy to see you." He laughed getting up to kiss my forehead. "I love you so much. How do you feel? The doctor said it looked bad." He says stroking my face with his finger.
"I feel better now that you're here." I smile. I missed him so much. I'm so happy he's here. I just want to grab his face and kiss him, but I won't, I'll wait for him to kiss me.
"That beautiful smile." He smiles back. We don't say anything for a while, we just smile and stare at each other. He has gotten so cute. "Happy anniversary... or belated anniversary I should say." He gives out a small laugh.
"You remembered." He remembered! I knew he would.
"I could never forget our anniversary." He smiles lightly stroking my cheeks as he stares into my eyes. I give him a look. "Except for that one.." He leans in just a bit like he's going to kiss me, but then he stops, and leans back and kisses my hand instead. "I'll never forget another anniversary again. I got you a present.. it's at home though."
"You bought me a present?" He is too amazing.
He nods. "I wanted to make sure that you knew that I still love you even if you weren't here. I still thought of you." He kissed my hand again and tears began swelling in his eyes again.
"What's wrong?" I ask touching his soft face.
"I just... I just can't understand how anyone could hurt someone so beautiful. I don't understand how anyone could hurt you. When I saw you last night just laying there on the ground..." He put his hands over his face and continued crying.
"Honey..." I say stroking his arm.
"I didn't know it was you. I didn't know it was you until you opened your eyes. You opened your eyes for a couple of seconds before passing out. I was so scared. When I saw your eyes... I knew it was you. I knew those were your eyes. I couldn't doubt it for a single second. When you closed your eyes I thought I lost you forever." He found me? I don't understand.
I wiped the tears off his cheeks. "What do you mean? Did you find me?"
"Joey, and Ross took me out because they thought I was acting weird all day, and of course I was! It was our anniversary and you were still missing and I tried so hard to find you and I missed you so much. We went to a movie and Ross had to go because Emma was sick, so it was just Joey and I, and after the movie we were walking home and I heard someone crying and I went over to see what it was and it was a woman." He begins to choke up and I take his hand and kiss it. He's amazing. I am now crying with him. "Joey wanted to leave because he thought you were a homeless woman, but I just couldn't leave. I couldn't leave that hurt woman there. I just wanted to make sure she was fine before I left. I mean I thought if you were lying on the street somewhere I know I would want someone to help you. And I just knew I couldn't leave. Joey called for help and I stayed there with you and you opened your eyes... and I just couldn't believe it. What if I listened to Joey and left you? I'd still be looking for you. I'm glad I sort of got to see you on our anniversary." He smiles at me and wipes the tears from his eyes. He found me. Chandler is so amazing. I think I love him more than I have ever loved him. "When I came in and saw you were awake I just.. I wanted to wrap you in my arms and tell you how much I love you, but I really didn't want to hurt you because the doctor said you'd be in a lot of pain." Doctor was certainly right about that. But I'd live through the pain if I could be wrapped up in his arms.
"I love you so much." I touch his face and I just have to kiss him. I want to kiss him. I have to. I slowly lean forward but stop and gasp.
"What's wrong?" He says alerted.
"I want to kiss you. It just hurts to lean in."
"You want to kiss me?"
I nod my head and smile. Maybe he doesn't want to kiss me and that's why he stopped himself from kissing me earlier. Maybe my face is just hideous. It's probably all of these tubes... and I probably have awful looking cuts and bruises on my face. "I really do."
"Me too. I just wasn't sure if you were ready... or wanted to for that matter." He smiles and slowly leans in. Our lips meet, his lips are so soft, I completely forgot how amazingly soft they are. Our little kiss turns into a long passionate kiss. The kiss I've been waiting for.
Thanks for the reviews! Sorry for the delay. Hope you liked this chapter. Please review. I promise the next chapter wont' take forever.