"um Parkinson, should we really be meeting to strategize about getting Hermione and Zabini together… here?" Ron asked in an awkward whisper.
"Why not?" Pansy countered with a quick glance.
"We're in the head quarters for crying out loud!" he exclaimed.
"calm down, they're hardly gunna come in here, they just barely gained access to it and right now I can assure you that they are avoiding any and all contact with each other" Pansy drawled.
"Huh? Why would they do that when they've got all this?" Ron asked looking around at the lavish interior.
"exactly." Pansy said smiling slightly.
"What?" Ron asked blankly.
"look …Granger is most likely hauled up in the library because she's pathetic, while Blaise has taken shelter in some strange empty classroom because he's antisocial and creepy, we're doing them a favor by getting them together, we should at least get something out of it." She said flopping down in a large cushy chair.
" one of them is bound to come in here" Ron said sitting awkwardly on a couch.
"We'll cross that bridge when we come to it" Pansy said reaching for her book bag.
"here" Ron said handing then large bag to her.
"Thanks" she said pulling out a small book of parchment.
"what's that?" Ron asked as she opened the book to an empty page.
"a journal to monitor their progress" Pansy said handing it to him.
""you've only got a half a page of writing and two pages of these weird drawings… is that an orange cat ?" Ron asked before the book was snatched out of his hands.
"I haven't had a real chance to recon and I got bored watching them in the library" she said blushing slightly.
"well I've got quidditch practice right now" Ron said looking at the large clock on the wall.
"ok then we'll continue this later" Pansy said packing away her things.
Ron stood and waited next to her.
"What?" she asked when she noticed him standing next to her waiting with his hand outstretched.
"Hand over yer bag, I'll walk you to the dungeons" he said awkwardly.
"why?" she asked slightly taken back.
"just… because, now come on" he said taking her bag from her hands.
Pansy followed him out of the heads quarters and they started their silent trek down to the dungeons.
Pansy, who was slowly starting to get annoyed with the silence, started to hum.
"what are you humming?" Ron asked after a while.
"Some muggle song that I heard some Hufflepuffs listening to." Pansy said shrugging.
" it sounds familiar… I think I heard Fred and George play it… what are the words again… I like… big.." Ron said trailing off in thought.
"they say 'I like big butts and I cannot lie… you other brothers cant deny .." Pansy sang and soon Ron joined her.
"When a girl walks in with a itty bitty waist and a round thing in your face you get sprung… " they sang in unison before bursting into a fit of laughter.
"What on earth are two doing?" Someone drawled from in front of them.
They looked up to see Draco standing there looking a bit nauseous.
"my, my dear I should be asking you the same thing" Pansy said staring at her friends uncommonly disheveled hair.
" ugh, some Hufflepuff fifth year thought it was a nice idea to try to ravage me in a broom cupboard." Draco said smearing the pink lipstick from his pale neck.
"Darling you should really just come out already, then you wont have to deal with this shite anymore" pansy said gently.
" Pansy shut up" Draco growled. Pansy smirked and Draco turned his gaze to Ron.
"Whatever… Weasel…I mean… Weasley what are you doing here?" Draco asked rolling his eyes.
"I was walking Pansy to the dungeons before practice" Ron replied shortly.
"how disgusting. Well you better leave if you want to get to practice on time" Draco sneered.
"whatever, here Pansy" Ron said handing her bag to her.
"oh thanks" She said taking it. They exchanged glances and Pansy quickly raised an eyebrow.
" well I'll see ya" Ron said awkwardly leaning in after seeing her signal.
"Oh please don't kiss in front of me, I've had enough inter-house relations for the day" Draco said almost gagging.
Pansy and Ron sprang apart and Ron waved before walking away.
"Bitch" Pansy said casually as she passed Draco.
"Whore" Draco replied walking next to her.
"No no no darling, I wasn't the one snogging fifth year Hufflepuffs in the broom cupboard." Pansy sang mockingly giving him a smirk.
"Oh don't act like you've never done it before" Draco sneered.
"Not this year" Pansy replied shrugging slightly.
"I hope not, if you keep stealing the younger year's virginity, I'm going to have to report you eventually" Draco said smirking.
" you'd never do such a thing, you need me to buy all of your girly things" Pansy said rolling her eyes.
" and when your at St. Mungos receiving psychiatric assistance you'll always be thinking.. 'I should have been nicer to Draco'" he drawled looking away in thought ignoring her comment and doing a horrible impression of her voice.
"And you're going insane when you run out of your shampoo, conditioning and skin care systems you'll be screaming to the world about how much you miss me " Pansy said almost laughing.
"Its not that important" Draco scoffed.
"Yes you'll definitely say that when you're hair dries out and you get your first zit" Pansy said casually.
Draco's eyes widened and he paled slightly.
"don't speak of such horrible things" Draco said shuddering.
"by the way Draco, where is your bookbag?" Pansy asked inspecting her friend.
"huh… damn I must have left it where that bloody Hufflepuff violated me" Draco growled.
"You better go get it before she finds it and holds it ransom" pansy said giggling.
"Fuck I left my latest issue of Nymph Fashion in there, I'm going to go find it" Draco said rushing down the corridor.
"Don't let any fourth years rape you!" Pansy yelled after him.
He flipped her off but continued running down the hall.
"that boy really needs to come out" Pansy muttered to herself before walking off .
Draco walked down the hall trying to remember which broom cupboard he had run from and hoping that the girl wasn't there or had taken his things.
Turning the corner quickly with his mind was so occupied with thoughts of his precious possessions that he failed to notice Harry Potter, who was currently running late for quidditch practice, running down the hall at a high speed.
Thus they resulted in a heavily panting heap on the floor.
Harry stared down at Draco, reveling in the feeling of having the blond boy pinned under him as Draco countered his stare and they both felt themselves being drawn in like a daze had washed over the two wizards.
Unfortunately just as their lips were mere centimeters away, the same Hufflepuff girl who forced Draco into a broom cupboard rounded the corner with Draco's book bag in hand just in time to witness a kiss between two of her biggest crushes, had it not been for the half squeak half scream that escaped her throat.
Immediately both of them looked up to see the girl running away and suddenly Harry jumped off Draco as though he were made of spikes.
'Malfoy!… spikes… leather… chains.. bad thoughts bad thoughts bad thoughts' Harry thought before suddenly remembering why he had been running.
Without wasting another second he dashed off down the corridor leaving Draco on the floor cursing every Hufflepuff to hell.
"Ah! there you are" Pansy said as she pushed open the door to an empty classroom, revealing a concentrated Blaise.
"What do you want?' he asked not looking up.
"I want a chocolate crème puff and I want you to stop being antisocial and come to the library with me" Pansy said quickly.
"no" he replied without a second thought.
"oh come on Blaise don't make me go by myself, that'd be horrible for my reputation" she whined.
"your reputation is horrible" he replied.
"true! but still!" she exclaimed
"take your boyfriend" he said still writing.
" he's got quidditch practice" she said quickly.
"Take Draco" came his reply.
"he's thinking about Potter's sweaty body at quiditch practice" she replied giving him a pleading look.
He sighed heavily and looked up to glare at her to which she gave a bright smile.
"fine but only to shut you up" he growled.
"well that's good enough" she replied happily.
He gathered his things and followed her out. They walked a short way to the library and Pansy bee-lined straight for Hermione's table.
Setting her books down loudly and earning a shush from Madame Pince, Pansy successfully snapped Hermione out of her work mode and found herself at the receiving end of Hermione's wand.
"Nice reflexes. Can we join you?" Pansy asked unfazed by the fact that she was being held at wand-point by one of the deadliest students at Hogwarts and motioning toward her friend who was glaring holes in the back of her head.
"uhhh" Hermione started completely lost as to how to reply.
"great, excuse me I have to go find a book" she said dashing away after she quickly grabbed her journal.
She hid behind a bookshelf and watched as Blaise set his things down quietly and began to work.
She waited for a good ten minutes waiting for one of them to break the silence but it never occurred.
"damn" she muttered when she realized that she had left her wand with her things.
Looking around she spotted a first year Ravenclaw sitting on the floor in her isle reading a book more than half his size.
"hey …psst, give me your wand" she hissed. He looked up at her owlishly before narrowing his eyes.
"no" he huffed remembering the things that older years said about Slytherins.
"give it to me now" she said in a deadly whisper. He suddenly remembered all the other things that the older years had said about Slytherin, especially the girls. He looked positively frightened and handed her his wand.
Walking back to her original place, Pansy said a spell to misplace their papers, but somehow between muttering the spell and doing the wrist movement with the strange wand she managed to explode both of their inkpots and set their quills of fire.
Widening her eyes in fear she quickly threw the wand back to its owner and rushed away for safety.
After a few screams, yells and cloaks catching on fire, which led to a few thumps in inappropriate places, followed by a loud smack the small first year Ravenclaw was met with two ink covered, smoking, blushing and angry Co-Heads.
The first year Ravenclaw wished he had never let himself be had by the scary Slytherin girl and from that day foreward feared any mention of Pansy Parkinson.
revieeeeeew