Dreams and Desires By Troubled Tazzy

A/N Well here is is the chapter you will love, hate and question at the end. No the characters are not mine. Enjoy Everyone :)

Chapter 26:

Brightness surrounded Lily, squinting her eyes and putting her hand up Lily tried to look around but the light was to blinding; and she was distracted from a noise she heard. A women's screaming had filled her ears, getting louder and louder as Lily moved nearer to it.

The light suddenly turned off and Lily was on all fours, puffing and sweating, as the screaming continued. Lily looked up, raindrops were falling upon her face getting heavier and heavier making the sky darken as it poured down. Lifting herself up slowly, Lily got to her feet she felt herself shaking; she looked around at her surroundings seeing an alley way in which was darkened at one end. She could just make out some dark figures, but as she looked closely she saw a better picture. Lily's mouth opened ready to scream as she saw a woman lying over a dead man, the woman was screaming and shaking the man but he wouldn't move, she looked up to see a dark figure looking down at them, the woman was pleading for mercy, but the dark figure ignored her and with a blast from his wand the woman lied dead on the man. The dark figure turned and started walking towards where Lily was standing, Lily was to scared to move, her mouth was hanging open and her eyes were popping out of her head. The dark figure moved closer, until he was only a couple of centimeters away from her. He walked right through Lily and kept walking, Lily felt chills go through her as his body went through hers, she looked at the bodies on the ground and ran towards them kneeling down next to them as rain fell upon them. Lily felt her heart pump faster as she looked at both the man and the woman, tears had come to her eyes as she muttered them two words that she did not wish to be true.

"Mum, Dad?"

Lily looked up at where the dark figure had gone he had stopped walking and was looking back down the alley, looking at the bodies that lay at the end, he put his wand in his pocket and pulled down his hood. A crack of lightning lit up the sky behind him, showing his face. Lily heard herself screaming, a horrible scream that had been drowned out from the following clash of thunder; a scream that she had never heard herself do, a scream that was both deafening and horrible, as the figure before her was the one she loved the most, a boy she could never have thought could be a murderer. James stood before her, younger, but still the same, his sorrowful eyes looked down that alleyway, eyes in which Lily felt hatred towards, a hatred she feared she could have never felt towards anyone. Lily watched as she saw him put his hood over his face and walk away. Lily looked down at her parents, her eyes flamed as she had finally learned the truth, truth in which Snape had been right about, the truth in which she was to stubborn to believe. James had killed her parents.

X X X X X

James woke to screaming, a high-pitched scream, which made him cover his ears. Looking around he saw it was coming from Lily, he sat up watching as she screamed and twisted and turned, her eyes were closed. He watched as Madam Cunnings came racing in with her night cap on, a hot bowl of water and cloth was in her hand, spilling most of it she raced to Lily's bed, placing the hot cloth on Lily's forehead she got out her wand and muttered a spell James could not hear. Lily stopped screaming and moving and lay still, as if she was like that all along, James watched as he saw Lily's fists clench, watching as her face expression changed.

"Should she be doing that?" asked James to Madam Cunnings.

"No, she is suffering from symptoms I have never seen before," Madam Cunning explained as she patted Lily's forehead with the cloth.

"She will wake up won't she?" asked James as he starred at Madam Cunnings.

"I don't know, I really don't know," Cunnings muttered as she looked down at Lily.

X X X X X

Hours passed after Lily's breakdown, Madam Cunnings had been by her side ever since. Waiting to see if she would come out of her nightmare, come out of the dream she was not supposed to see. James wondered to himself what Lily could have been thinking, and how it could of made her so angry. Watching her closely, he noticed changes in the sweet and innocent Lily he had once known, her face was not pasty white, it had a tinge of red that was going a more deeper and darker red, her forehead was lined with a lot of creases, her eyes weren't relaxed they were tightly squinted as if she had been looking at a bright sun, the hands in which had been placed by her sides were now clench, with her nails digging into her.

"When is she going to wake?" James asked desperately to himself.

"When will I be able to see the green eyes in which I had loved?"

X X X X X

Looking at her parents bodies, Lily's fists clenched, anger rising all through her body, trembling and breathing slowly as thoughts crossed her mind.

"He had been lying to me ever since he first saw me," Lily said out loud as she stood, still looking down at the cold cement that her hands had rested on just moments ago.

"Why did he do this? Why, why, WHY?" Lily screamed as she raced back up the alley, back into the light in which had taken her to this nightmare, back to where she had left so long ago.

X X X X X

Lily's eyes flickered open, staring at the white ceiling in which she knew was familiar; she was back, back in the real world. She tried to move her fingers and arms but they did nothing. Lily tried to cough or speak, but she couldn't, she could only move her eyes, she looked to the right and saw a sleeping Madam Cunnings next to her, who was snoring a bit to loudly. Lily looked to the left, tears welled in her eyes, for on her left was James. Staring at her and watching her eyes, he got up out of his bed and limped towards her. Lily saw he had bandages on his ankles and on his wrists, she saw the pain in his eyes in which he was going through every movement he took but he still came to her, sitting in an armchair by her side.

"Lily?" James mumbled as he looked into the deep green eyes in which he had been so longing to see.

"Can you hear me?" he asked as his hand swept over her face, brushing her hair away.

That was the last Lily heard from James as her eyes started to feel heavy; as she closed them once again she found once more she was in darkness.

Waking once more Lily saw sunlight washing through the windows; birds were sitting on the branches just outside, twittering to each other, then flying off. Lily remembering last night moved her eyes to the left, looking at an empty armchair, she looked over to the bed and saw a huge lump underneath the blankets. Trying to move her body again Lily failed miserably. Madam Cunnings came busting out of her office, and went over to open other curtains to let the blaring sunlight in, as she looked around at the beds she looked at Lily and shrieked.

"Oh, Lily dear." Cunnings mumbled after her shriek.

"You frightened me," she laughed as she came over to her bed.

"You are one lucky girl," she repeated, (more to herself then to Lily) as she came over to Lily's bed.

"Lily, you are so quiet," Cunnings replied after awhile as Lily had not said a word.

"Lily?" Madam Cunnings asked uncertainly, she took the covers off Lily, touching her arms and legs.

"You are so cold, can you talk or move anything at all," Madam Cunnings asked, as she looked at Lily shocked.

"Move your toes for me,"

Lily tried with all her might but by Madam Cunning's reaction she must have done nothing.

"Oh Lily," tears welled in Cunnings eyes as she looked down at Lily sorrowfully.

"I can't do anything, these symptoms your showing I have not seen before, Lily dear it'll be ok, we'll get you a nurse who will be able to help you," Madam Cunnings told her before she bustled out of the hospital wing heading for Dumbledore's office.

Lily couldn't stop the tears prickling at her eyes and running down her cheeks nor could she wipe them away as she was scared. Scared she will never be herself again. Scared she will be like this forever.

Lily heard a whisper come from the other side of the room, she looked over to the left, and in the armchair was James, oh how Lily wished James had not heard what Madam Cunnings had said.

"Lily, I overheard what Madam Cunnings said," James said as he watched her eyes, for that's the only source of emotion he could get out of Lily.

Lily looked away staring at the ceiling, feeling anger go through her once again as James talked to her. How Lily wished she could start yelling and screaming, but the main reason she wanted to be herself again was to ask him why, what had given him the right to kill her parents, why did he give them a cold death in which had been kept from her, but mostly why he had lied to her from the start. How could someone she loved so much have done this to people she had loved, what gave him the right to take away people in her life that mattered to her? Question after question kept going through Lily's head until she felt her head was full. Lily had forgotten James was there until he started talking again.

"Lily, what happened in the lake…I'm sorry, it was all my fault, if I hadn't of pushed you in, this wouldn't have happened, Lily I love you so much, and I will not leave you, you will get through this and I'll help you get through it, I'll always be there for you Lily," James said as he watched Lily, tears filled his eyes as he watched the girl he loved go through pain in which he had put on her. James looked at her hand on the bed, lying there helplessly and cold, he picked it up and kissed it. Coldness ran over his lips, he looked deep into Lily's eyes and wrapped her hand in both of his, watching her as she watched him. They remained like that for what seemed like ages, until the hospital wing door gave a big slam, as two teachers walked in.

"Excuse me Mr. Potter I believe you should be in your bed and getting some rest to help your wounds heal," Madam Cunnings said harshly as she watched him.

"Yes, Mr. Potter I believe you should go and rest," agreed Dumbledore as he gestured James out of the armchair.

"Yes sir," James replied as he looked at Lily then placing her hand lightly on the bed, before walking over to his own. Madam Cunnings came and fussed over James, tucking him in and checking his bandages before she shut the curtains around his bed. James felt he was in a dream as he stared at the ceiling, he felt there was no way Lily could be like this, it was all a mistake it wasn't meant to happen to her. His thoughts got broken as he heard whispering coming from Lily's bed.

"Abigail (Madam Cunnings first name) what are the symptoms for her condition," Dumbledore asked as he looked down at Lily with his blue eyes.

"That's what I came to tell you I have no idea, she is showing symptoms I haven't been taught how to handle, let alone know what to do to help, I'm not even sure if she will be the same again," Madam Cunnings whispered the last bit to Dumbledore, but she didn't need to as Lily had already heard it. Dumbledore looked down at Lily with his sparkling half moon glasses.

"Lily, we are going to keep you here for a few days to see if anything changes, but if no changes occur we'll have to send you out of Hogwarts and to professionals, if you understand what I'm saying please blink twice if not then blink once," Dumbledore explained as he waited for Lily's answer.

Lily looked up at Dumbledore, up at his crooked nose and at all the lines of concern for her welfare; she blinked twice, answering yes to him, but no to herself, as she couldn't believe they haven't got a cure for whatever she had. She had to wait it out, wait out the next days in which she was to see if there was any improvement. But one small thought still wandered around in Lily's mind, a thought in which she had thought about and pushed aside, but it kept coming back when she thought about what happened to her parents.

"Could James have been blackmailed?"

A/N Well here is the chapter everyone has waited patiently for and here it is :) it took awhile but I finally made a long one, are you all happy now?????? You better be LOL jokes. Well I hope you all enjoyed it I'll try and update as soon as. But in the mean time you should all review and tell me what you thought of this chapter.

Love Always Troubled Tazzy