-The whole entire time I was writing this I listened to this song over and over again. Seriously, repeatedly the whole time. "Insa" by…well I don't know who it was by but I listened to the JaeJoong version. Seriously, listen to this song while you're reading the last section. It makes a lot of difference. And yes I know it's not in English.

It's the day of graduation and you realize that something is wrong. Well, you always knew there was something wrong but now you become aware of a glowing disturbance you hadn't seen before.

Life is different now. Not so different from it was before in all reality, but that night with Brooke in the rain you had recognized when everything shifted, moving slightly to the left and away from what you had truly desired. The movement distracted you just enough that one person is able to notice the difference. Not immediately—of course not. You're not nearly as transparent as some would like to paint you. They like to say they understand you. They say they're your friends and family, which they are, but when they say they know what you're thinking, you're forced to wonder. Do they know you go so much deeper then they had ever imagined? Do they know that, even though you have all been friends for such a long time they'd still be surprised by the thoughts that you find unwillingly running through your mind? But then again, would Haley really be surprised? You should have known she would notice something was off. You should have prepared for it.

She had confronted you about it after a while. Asking questions that you brushed off with a small laugh and a hug. Haley didn't really understand though. You couldn't explain everything that's going on even if you wanted to. You can't explain the subtle slide of your heart in a sloping direction away from your girlfriend and towards your ex. You can't explain the new-found knowledge that you attained with a quiet amount of distress. You can't explain the desperate clinging to Peyton because you are frantic for something you know you can have even if it's not what you want. You can't explain how you need Peyton because you can't have Brooke. Because you can't touch her or hold her or have her and yet you can't help but hope that by staying with Peyton it will somehow make you worthy of Brooke. You can't explain any of this because it would be the end. You know this with a sad sort of finality. This knowledge in the hands of anyone else would end everything that made sense in the world, destroy the family your group of friends has formed. Tear your world apart.

As you lay in bed, listening to the gentle breathing of Peyton beside you, you had vowed to keep it a secret. It was the only way you could think of to protect the girl lying next to you—and if it meant hurting yourself you were willing to take the pain. Because in so many ways you felt like you deserved it. Every time Brooke looked at you with those wide soulful hazel green eyes it made you want to die. It took away everything that mattered in your world and made it into nothing. Or more accurately, it took everything that mattered in your world and melted it down, twisting it, shaping it, molding it, until it fit the perfect form of your girlfriends best friend. Your everything. So you stayed. You took the pain that you knew you deserved in order to protect what you had. You promised to cut out that little part of yourself that made you care; even though it might leave you bleeding and broken you were determined to force all thoughts of Brooke out of your mind and focus on Peyton. It never worked. But you kept at it all the same. Because you weren't allowed to be in love. Not with her. Not now. Not ever.

So lying in the gracious cover of the early morning hours, you gave yourself permission to release those few silent tears. You allowed yourself to mourn the love that would never exist. When you felt yourself starting to loose control, near that edge you so desperately feared falling over, you cut yourself off. You blocked the tears and closed off the knowledge that you weren't with her—the knowledge that hurt you more intently then anything you've ever known before. A hurt that you realized will have the rest of your life to tear you down completely.

In a few hours the sun rose. You returned to what they all know of you. Brushing a quick passionless kiss against Peyton's brow before stepping into the shower. You don't mention the feelings that are slowly breaking you down. You try not to wonder what it would be like to kiss her again, to hold her and love her. You don't look into her eyes.

And you continue pretending this isn't killing you.

You had thought nobody noticed. You thought in the constant motion and drama of Tree Hill maybe, just maybe nobody would see. Maybe it wasn't as obvious as you thought it was. Maybe you only thought people could see because the only times you made eye contact with Brooke she would give you a warning glance before looking quickly away. And maybe it was because even in those few seconds you had together you could see, clearly, heartbreakingly, that she still loves you.

But then again maybe Haley noticed something because she caught you sitting silently at the Rivercourt for the sixth time in a row. The first few times you brushed it off as having lots to think about. With college and your mom's baby and all. But then Haley told you, her eyes searching and curious, that she knows you're a really thoughtful guy, but this is far more then anyone could possibly think while staying healthy, especially for someone your age. The sixth time she walked in on you though, she stopped asking questions. She sat and watched you watch nothing. For at least twenty minutes you sat there with her—trying to disguise the evolution of your thoughts about Brooke. It started out as affection as always, memories of the times you had with her then turned to possibility. From there it went to insecurity, uncertainty, and then it quickly downslides into desperation and despair so absolute that Haley let out a small gasp that caused you to turn and look at her.

You quickly smiled, trying with all your might to hide all the thoughts running through your mind. For a moment Haley seemed to buy it and you wondered if you were really that much of a better actor then they had ever given you credit for and you started to apologize for your daydreaming when she interrupted you.

"Just drop the act Lucas," she had snapped, pushing her hair out of her face. You couldn't pretend that the brief flash of panic that darted across your face was anything other then that and Haley knew it.

"Something's wrong," Haley said, looking deeper into your eyes. You turned away from her and looked out at the river again, silent. "I've been watching you for a while Luke," she continued. "Do you really think I didn't notice that wistful longing that takes over you when you think nobodies watching? You never even try to speak up when we're with the entire group unless you're singled out or specifically targeted."

You almost winced but managed to hold it back. Would Haley understand? Would she understand the constant torture and pain and agony of being away from Brooke like this?

"For a while I really couldn't figure it out," Haley laughed bitterly, turning away from you to look out across the river. "You're far too subtle, really. Too good at keeping to yourself. I narrowed it down to a few things, couldn't stop thinking about what's wrong with you—you know? It wouldn't leave me alone…"

Like Brooke would never leave you alone. She was always there—a shadow, flitting around on the side edges of your vision, constant, shimmering, always out of reach. You had found a strange euphoria at discovering you were in love with Brooke. You had finally made your decision about who you truly loved and this decision was forever. It wasn't the ideal situation, but falling in love rarely is. It's always a bit impulsive, intrusive. Selfish. But you were determined not to be selfish. You would protect the people around you.

"I wasn't really sure when it happened," Haley continued, her soft voice never wavering. "When I realized that your feelings for Peyton had shifted."

You remain motionless. A stone. You can't move. You can't talk. You can't feel.

"At first I thought it was just the stress. We've all been really busy lately, and we all had our own little breakdowns ages ago so I thought maybe this was just a phase."

Your internal Lucas nodded his head. You had so wanted it to be the stress. You had wanted so desperately for it to be a phase.

"But that's not it," you wished Haley would stop talking. Wished she would leave you alone. "You fell in love with someone else." Shut up shut up shut up. "At first I didn't know who it was. I mean, you'd think, considering the amount of time we spend together, you'd slip up, just once. But you didn't. So I started watching you closer. Three days later I started wondering how nobody else had noticed. You know you're pretty obvious if a person watches for the right things. It wasn't in your eyes or stolen glances. Wasn't in anything you said, not in any drastic changes of mood, or even slight ones. In fact, it wasn't in anything you did at all. It was in what you didn't do." You close your eyes. "Do you realize you don't initiate any kind of contact anymore? You don't tease her or stand still long enough to be next to her, in fact, you don't really touch Brooke at all anymore." Your eyes clenched shut tighter.

"Don't worry," Haley said, still not looking at you. "I haven't told anyone."

You sighed and buried your head in your hands. Was it possible to cheat emotionally one someone? It was a sin. It was wrong and immoral and nothing had ever felt more right. You hated her for making you feel like this. You despised her for digging those beautifully slender fingers into your heart and refusing to let go. You wanted nothing more then to be free of her; you wanted to be able to ignore those angelical eyes and that soft tender mouth. You wanted to resist the temptation with everything you had in you. You told yourself repeatedly that it was nothing. That you would stop. That what you were feeling wasn't real. But that was a lie. No matter how many times you told yourself this was going to end, this emotional torture, every time she looked at you with those wide, captivating eyes, you would feel yourself give in.

And no matter how much you meant it, no matter how determined you were to stop thinking about her; she always had you coming back for more.

You could never figure out exactly what it was about her that you couldn't let go of, because it seemed like it was everything. It was the way she would smile and melt back into your arms when you hugged her from behind. It was the way she laughed and sang and always tried not to cry in public even when she felt like breaking down. It was the way she held your hand when you felt like breaking down. It was the way she nodded solemnly every time you said something to her and yet even then you would want to smile because it was like the two of you were caught in some inside joke that only the two of you understood. It was the way she claimed you and conquered you and let you go all the while knowing that you'd be back.

Like a yo-yo she had pushed you away and pulled you back in sync with the ongoing cycle of you leaving her and returning again. Over and over until all you wanted was to lie in her arms and rest there forever without having to ever worry about leaving her again.

Because every time you walked past her you felt the hooks she had attached so diligently to your heart tug and pull until it made you physically sick to be away from her.

People always got it wrong. They always said she was the one who was devoted to you and you were the one who simply accepted her love. You weren't deserving of any devotion. It was she who was your salvation. She who was your savior. And when the pressure was too much and the weight of the world was pressing down on your shoulders it was your thoughts of her that lightened your load. It was the memory of her rubbing soothing circles in your back and talking to you calmly until you were once again reassured that you could handle it.

It was the memory of her soft touches under the cover of darkness that healed your wounds and it was her light burning kisses that scarred you all over again.

You should have stopped the endless torture. You really should have done it. Just walked away without looking back. But you couldn't. You weren't sure if you would ever be able to let her go.

Her smile was in your mind, her voice was in your ears, her touch was lighting a burning inferno of fire on your skin, and your heart was in her hands.

She never offered to give it back, and even if she had, you weren't sure you would have taken it. Somehow it felt right.

"You love her, don't you?" Haley whispered, finally turning to face you. You looked down at her, a bitter smile touching the corners of your lips and she nodded sadly. "I'm sorry," she offered, shrugging slightly. "If it helps she loves you too…"

"It doesn't," you finally said, looking down at your hands. "It makes it worse." She nodded again, resting her head against your shoulder and sighing.

"I'm sorry."

Something's wrong. You stand in your dark blue graduation outfit and turn to scan the crowd. Haley and Nathan, laughing, making their way towards their seats. Brooke and Mouth, grinning, adjusting hats and joking around. You turn a little to the right and you see her. Peyton.

She turns and catches your eye and you wait expectantly for the small lift in the corners of her lips or a suggestive wink that you can grin back at—but her face remains smooth and impassive and she turns away without a word. The shock roots you motionless to the spot but then you realize—with the force of a rocket hitting you at full blast what is really happening. She knows. You don't know how she figured it out, or who told her, but the truth is there and undeniable and you can't ignore it. She knows.

You try to make your way through the crowd towards her but Peyton is walking away already and the crowd is thick. By the time you reach where she was everyone is filling into their seats and you are being called by Nathan. You see Peyton sitting silently, staring straight ahead but you make your way to your brother instead. Throughout the whole entire ceremony you can't think of anything but the look on her face. How could she know? Haley wouldn't have told her, and Brooke clearly didn't, so she must have figured it out on her own. You groan and try to listen as Haley gives her speech. Every else goes smoothly as the ceremony progresses and when it's finally over and you have your diploma you barely recognize the significance of the moment.

Brooke hugs you gently before the pictures are taken. She lingers in your arms for a fraction of a second longer then she should but you pretend not to notice. The mere smell of her hair almost distracts you from the impending doom that Peyton is about to bring down on everyone's heads and with her in your arms it almost all disappears. But then Brooke pulls away and her eyes are shiny and glistening with tears and Haley pulls her in for a hug. You watch Brookes face as she wraps her arms around her friend and clenches her eyes shut tight. She opens them and blinks her tears away, looking up at you through her dark heavy lashes.

She hesitates then seems to decide something. She opens her mouth, that beautiful mouth and whispers, "I love you." You can't hear it but you can read the words on her lips and you know they're meant for you. You almost smile but a hand reaches out and rests gently on your arm and you turn to face your girlfriend.

"We need to talk."

You make your excuses to your friends and the two of you head off in Peyton's car. You wonder if this is the last time you'll ever get to ride in it. It seems like a small thing but somehow it amounts to so much more. When you finally get to the Rivercourt Peyton gets out of the car and snaps at you.

"Get out."

You follow her lead and walk over to her, tucking her hair gently behind her ears and trying desperately to think of something, anything to say.

"What's wrong?"

"What's wrong?" Oops. Wrong question. "Do you really want me to tell you what's wrong Lucas Scott?!" She pushes your hands away from her face and pushes you backwards with all the force she can muster. You stumble away from her and straighten up, silently waiting. "I'll tell you what's wrong!" Her eyes shimmer in tears but she refuses to let them fall. Pretty little Peyton. She's like Brooke in so many ways that you wonder if growing up they started getting their habits and mannerisms from each other until they shared almost everything. "I can't believe you would do this!" You don't ask for an explanation and it seems to confirm Peyton's thoughts. "You stupid man whore! You cheated on me!"

This time you protest because you can't stand to think of Peyton imagining that Brooke would ever do anything like that to her. "No, Peyton, I didn't cheat on you—"

"You're in love with her!" She screams it and you freeze in the middle of your sentence. Everything you had thought of saying flies out the window and you can't think of a word. You can't deny it. You don't want to. You love her and a large part of you wants the world to know it. But not now. Not like this. Peyton chokes on her words and tears start to rise up in her eyes. "Why?" she whispers, shaking her head. You stay motionless and she watches you for a moment with those large doe eyes. "I loved you Lucas. I love you. Why isn't that enough?"

"Peyton, it's not you, okay? I'm so sorry I just—"

"Don't," the tears start spilling over and a little part of you breaks a little more at the sight. "Please—" Peyton turns away and you move forward to comfort her but she holds a hand out and keeps you away. When she turns back to you she seems firmer. More in control. "This is done. This stupid…façade. Whatever this was to you, I'm done. I am not going to put myself through this anymore. I can't—"

"Peyton I'm so sorry," You say, trying to get her to understand what you feel. "I never meant for any of this to happen."

"But it did," Peyton says, looking resigned to the fact. She smiles slightly and reaches out to touch your jaw. "I love you Lucas. I'm sorry. I knew you didn't love me. I knew it was Brooke but I just—" she pauses and stares at you a moment longer like she's trying to engrave your face in her memory. "I just thought maybe there was a chance you would really come back to me."

"I wish—" you stop for a second and take a deep breath and then go on. "I wish it was you. I wish I was in love with you."

"But you're not," Peyton says, dropping her hand from your face.

"I'm sorry," you whisper again. Then Peyton reaches up and presses the lightest of kisses between your eyes, turns away, and leaves. You stand still for a moment longer, letting everything sink in, then you start to walk. You walk until your feet are sore and aching and you're finally home. You open the door and walk straight up to your room. You ignore everything around you and step into the bathroom, peeling off your clothes until you're standing, shivering, in front of the shower.

You turn the water on as hot as it can go and yet when you step under the waterfall of burning fire it still doesn't amount to the pain in your heart. You just want to be left alone. You can't feel the burning water pounding down on you and although you know that should be a relief, you find yourself yearning for the pain. Anything to distract your thoughts from her.

She won't leave you alone. No matter where you go or what you say she is always in your mind. You remember her face from earlier that day. You clench your eyes shut and yet you can feel them burn into you all the same. You feel her arms around you, embracing you, enclosing you, consuming you whole. Pale white and smooth, making you shiver at the thought.

You let the water run down into your eyes until they're red and watery and the tears start falling down. They mix with the water, salty and fresh, tumbling down your face until they land in the puddle at your feet.

You grab the soap and start to scrub. You scrub as hard as you can until your skin is red and raw and you can finally feel the water washing over you. It stings your tender skin but you continue to scrub—hoping that maybe if you do it long enough you can wash her right off you. Scrub away all the thoughts and dreams and wishes that you had ever hid inside your heart for her. Maybe if you go deep enough you can scrub her right out of your heart. It's not right. It's not fair. She's leaving tomorrow. She's going early for the fashion program in California and you don't even know if you'll get a chance to see her. You don't know if you want to see her. You can't do this to her. You can't ask her to stay for you. She deserves so much more. She doesn't deserve this. She doesn't deserve any of this.

When you step out of the shower half an hour later your skin is pink and scrubbed raw and it hurts to put your clothes back on but you pull on a pair of cargo shorts and a grey shirt and towel your hair dry.

A weight is lifted. Peyton knows. Peyton forgave you. You're free. No—you're not free. You're trapped in this and you don't know how to get out. You don't know what to do. Think Lucas, think, you urge yourself, trying to figure out some way to get to Brooke. To explain it to her and have her still love you. If she learns that Peyton broke up with you because of her you know she'll never forgive herself. That's just Brooke. She always blames herself for the things she can never control.

You're about to crumble down on your bed when you hear a knock on your door. You look up and immediately you can tell it's her. Her shadow is there and the form through the light cloth covering the window is instantly recognizable as hers. You've seen that shadow standing there so many times and yet somehow this time is different. You wait a moment, unsure of what you're going to do. What's about to happen. When you finally reach forward and open the door her back is facing it and she freezes in the act of walking away. You know at once that you can't let her walk away again.

"Brooke." She turns to look at you and you can tell she's been crying. Her mascara is smudged and running and her nose is slightly red. Your lips tilt up at the side a little at the sight and your eyes squint against the light.

"Hey Luke," she laughs and your smile widens at the sound. It's been so long since she's smiled at you that it feels like it did the very first time. "I just um…" she pauses and her eyes shift around the room slowly looking anywhere but at you. "I guess I just wanted to say goodbye."

The words stab you all over but your smile only falters for a second. "She told you."

Brooke looks up at you and all pretense leaves. "I'm so sorry Lucas. I didn't mean to ruin your relationship with Peyton like that—I can't believe—I didn't tell her, I swear, I didn't say anything, I don't know how she figured it out—"

"Brooke," you laugh and step forward, grabbing her shoulders gently in your hands and looking down at her. "Shh, it's okay, I'm alright, I know it's not your fault."

"I'm sorry Lucas," she whispers it and you place one hand on either side of her face forcing her to look up at you. She doesn't blink and neither of you look away. You keep your eyes open and on hers as you lean down and press a small kiss on her lips. You pull away and she watches you, her hands hang loosely by her sides and you wonder if you shouldn't be doing this. You're about to pull away from her when she closes her eyes and reaching up on her toes, kisses you again. She layers them lightly all over your face, forehead, nose, cheeks, chin, eyelids, she kisses every tear that slips out from under your closed lids and finally rests her cheek up against your own. You feel her tears sliding down her face and mixing with your own.

You can't think as you lift her up and carry her into your room. You place her on the bed and lie down next to her, your body spooning hers, your arm across her waist, and her head below your chin. You cry silently and reach up a hand to her face. You wipe her tears away with your thumb and try to make soothing noises in her ear but all that comes out are little gasping sobs. Brooke turns in your arms and faces you, biting her lip to try and control her emotions. She places one soft kiss on the corner of your lips then looks up at you. You understand instantly what she is doing and pull your shirt off over your head without a word. She runs her hands over your chest and the scalded skin seems to heal at her touch. She places one small palm over your heart and looks down at it. She leans over kisses the little scar that's there from the surgery. You draw her head back up towards yours rest your forehead against hers.

"I love you," you whisper, your voice thick with tears.

"I love you too," she sighs.

When you wake up later the sky is dark and the moonlight is shining in through the window in small silver patches. There is a vacancy next to you. A slight indentation in the sheets that betrays the absence of the love of your life. You inhale sharply and reach out to touch the wrinkles in the sheets wondering if she is really gone.

You toss the covers to the side and rise to your feet, pulling a pair of pajama pants on as you go. You see that the door is open just the slightest bit and make your way towards it slowly. When you open it you are met with the image of her sitting on your steps staring up at the star lit sky etched in light all the angles and curves of her body and face outlined in silver ink.

"Brooke?" You whisper, wrapping your arms around yourself to try and keep warm.

"Yeah…" Brooke murmurs, still staring up at the sky with a far away look on her face.

You move to sit next to her on the steps. She found one of your old t-shirts and is wearing it but you can still see her shivering from the cold so you wrap your arms around her and pull her closer.

"Come back to bed," you whisper, blinking up at the moonlit sky. Brooke's eyes flicker towards yours then she looks back out at the street. "Brooke…please…? I can't sleep without you."

She turns to look at you and her eyes are clear and sad and this time she doesn't look away.

"You're leaving tomorrow," you continue, trying with all your might not to cry again. "Just stay with me tonight, okay?" You take a deep breath and Brooke smiles sadly. "Brooke…" you swallow hard and she tilts her head to the side, resting her head against your shoulder.

"Okay…" she whispers, her voice so soft you can barely hear it. "I'll stay with you."

You bring her tighter into your arms and turn your head to place a kiss on her forehead. Her arms drop from their place wrapped around her legs and you flinch at the abrupt movement. She raises them and places them instead around your waist.

"I need you, Lucas…" she closes her eyes and moves forward until you are sheltering her body with your own, and her own legs entangle with yours. "I woke up…and I realized that I'll be waking up alone for a while and…I just thought maybe it would be better for you if I left…" you fight back the strong desire to cry. "I couldn't do it though. I couldn't leave…"

"So don't," you whisper, "Don't leave just yet. Stay with me tonight and I won't leave you okay? I'll do whatever it takes…" your eyes close, tears finally seeping through the thick coal black fringed lashes.

"…Okay," she choked out. "But let's just stay like this a little, okay?"

"Yeah," you whisper, your eyes burning with unshed tears. "That's okay."

A single smile

The last bow

It's early in the morning. How early, you don't know. The light of the sunrise creeps slowly through the large windows of the airport like blood spilling slowly into water, streaking the air crimson. The early morning clouds are spiked gold and black and yet you don't notice it at all.

"Are you sure you don't want me to call anyone?"

"It's okay, I already said goodbye to them all."

"And you'll call me as soon as you get there, right?"

"I promise."

You tug Brooke closer, inhaling the scent of her hair and memorizing the feel of her head resting against your neck.

"You're gonna do great Brooke."

"You know—"Brookes eyes dip to a close and you try not to loose yourself in the feeling of her presence. "There will never be anyone else…" she inches closer and leans against you. "I won't even look for someone…just so you know…I'll always love you…"

You attempt a smile. "It's okay Brooke, if you find someone…"

"No," she looks up at you and her eyes burn into you. "I don't want anyone else."

"I know…" You wish she wouldn't do this. You're not sure if you can let her get on that plane if she keeps looking at you like that.

You're taking your last bow

"Flight 259, Charlotte to LA, now boarding," a clear voice rings through the gate area. "Passengers must have their boarding passes ready along with…"

"That's me," Brooke whispers, her voice breaking as she brings a hand to your chest and leans back to get a good look at you. You swallow hard and nod, standing motionless as she soaks you in for what feels like could be the last time. Your own eyes drink in everything about her, the slight indention of dimples in her unsmiling cheeks, the small bruising of her lips and the light shadows under her eyes cast by the long eyelashes that blink slowly up at you. She swallows back a wave of tears and nods once.

"Okay," she whispers.

"Do you um…" you lick your suddenly dry lips and close your eyes to take another deep breath. "Do you have everything you need?"

"No…" Brooke chokes out, her voice weak as she tugs hintingly at your shirt. You allow a small smile to break out on your face although it quickly disappears.

Fly away

Fly away love

"Brooke…" you breathe, lifting your hands to cradle her face. "Go…"

"I love you…" Brooke whispers, leaning into your touch. Then she lifts the strap of her backpack over her shoulder, grabs her suitcase with the other hand, and turns away. Your hands fall to your sides and you stand, watching as she walks slowly away from you. Her steps are little and hesitant and you've never felt so protective of her in your entire life.

"Brooke—" you whisper softly, your hands finding their way into your pockets where they bunch nervously as she spins quickly back to face you. The look on her face tears at you and everything else seems to melt away. Your lungs seem to constrict in your throat and your eyes never leave Brooke's face.

Go, you urge her mentally. I'm sorry. Don't make this harder…please…go.

Then Brooke drops her bags, closes the gap between you and wraps her arms around your neck as she pulls you down for a kiss. Your fingers tangle in her chocolate brown hair and pull her closer—as close as you can possibly get and you know it isn't enough. Heat spreads through your body, burning you, consuming you, capturing you. You feel a desperate need to lock Brooke away and never let her leave you again but then she pulls away from you and buries her face in your neck.

Your eyes open and you realize your tears are falling into her hair. Her body shakes and shudders and you wrap your arms tighter around her, refusing to let her go.

When she finally pulls back to look into your eyes an endless stream of promises to never forget—to come back, pass between the two of you and her face blurrs with your tears.

"I told you not to look back…" you whisper, brushing a hand lightly against her cheek.

"I'll always look back. When I see someone who looks like you, or sounds like you…laughs like you…or sings like you…I'll always look back…" Her voice trembles and she leans her head back to try and stem the flow of tears. "Just in case…"

"I love you," you whisper as the last call for Brooke's flight rings through the airport.

Her fingers press against your face. Your lips. Then she smiles. Soft. Desperate. Loving. And the tears shake your vision so badly that you can't really see the smile anymore as she picks up her bags and walks backwards a few steps.

"I'll always love you Lucas," she says softly, holding a hand out towards your heart. You brush your tears away although new ones rise to replace them. "I've always loved you Lucas. I'll never stop." Her fingers rise to touch the spot right above her own heart. "I'll never really leave you."

Then she turns and this time she doenst look back. She walks as quickly as she can up to a flight attendant who checks her passport and identification then dissapears through the tunnel.

A sudden wave of loneliness washes over you and you blink and when you open your eyes she's gone.

You repeat her words in your head as if saying them enough will make her come back.

I'll always love you.

Tears slide endlessly down your face like a curtain and although you try to stop them you cant.

The one true love of my life

Goodbye

It was wrong and you knew it but then again, how could it be all that wrong when it felt so right? It was as if the two of you were puzzle pieces that matched perfectly together and when you stepped back to view the picture you had made you discovered it was a masterpiece. It was perfection. She was perfection.

And you could lie to yourself and tell yourself it would be best for both of you if you ended it, but deep down you knew that would never matter.

You could never stay away from her. She was the poison and the antidote. She was the cancer and the cure. She was everything. She was your wings.

She was your downfall.

Fly away

Fly away love