AbhorsenSabriel87: Hello again peoples. Hiei went off to get me some coffee and himself a Guinness at the pub down the street, so there's no one here to do my AN Sectional with me right now... Unless you count Fox-boy, who's terrified of me at the moment. --points at Kurama, who's reading her fic on a laptop in the corner--
Kurama: You are insane Sabriel! I don't know how Hiei puts up with you!
Sabriel: Do the disclaimer and reviewer responses with me and I'll set you free, my wimpy little fox.
Kurama: --nods and hands her list of reviewers--
Sabriel: Thanks. Ahem........
Kibethan – Whatever. Dogs are fun, but cats rule all.
Elements – Well, thanks to the four of you! I shall update!
kenshinfan21 – I'll smack him later since he's out right now…
Kurama: --sweatdrop--
Sabriel: But right now --knocks out Kurama with mallet-- Kurama is out for your enjoyment. And this chappie is a bit sad, but don't worry, it'll be better next chapter.
Flame Swordswoman – Hear ya loud and clear! Thanks for the compliments!
Kakarots-Frying-Pan – Yes, Seto is kawaii. --nods-- Thanks for recommending me to others, but don't get too addicted!
Angel-Belle – How do you know they're not real people in another dimension?
Kurama: --has woken up, sweatdrops--
Sabriel: --glares at him--
KillmeKissme – Omigods! I love that manga! I need volume 2 though… Anywho, thanks!
Sabriel: That takes care of that. Disclaimer, Fox-boy?
Kurama: AbhorsenSabriel87 does not own any Yu Yu Hakusho or Yu-Gi-Oh! characters.
Sabriel: ...Well, that works, I guess. Now on to the fic before I completely destroy the mood once again.
Kurama: --runs away--
Sabriel: --sighs-- Good help is so hard to manipulate.
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----"NO! You can't hurt him! I won't let you!" A child's voice, pleading and afraid. "Let him go! He didn't do anything to you! Put him down!" Seto Kaiba lay in the dark, asleep and tormented, his face in an expression of pain and agony. His hands gripped at the sheets covering him, the comforter on the floor in a pile. The thermostat in the room read only seventy degrees, but the young brunette was covered in sweat, tossing and turning in his four-poster bed.
----"Please! Leave him alone! Mokuba didn't do anything! Take me instead, I'm the one you're mad at!" His knuckles were white as he gripped the bed sheets tightly, his entire body tense and shaking. Tears formed at the corners of his tightly shut eyes and his teeth bit into his bottom lip as if to keep from screaming. 'Why am I seeing this again? Why am I hearing this again?'
----"Don't touch Mokuba!" A child's face, bruised and scared, appears before the darkness, his deep blue eyes wide and pleading. "I won't let you hurt him! He's not strong enough, I am!" Tears pour out of the eyes as they narrow in anger. "I won't let you defile my little brother!" Evil and maniacal laughter echoes in the dark as the boy's scared face disappears. More sweat poured down Seto's darkened face and his jaw clenched tighter. Blood poured from his cut lip as he tried desperately to fight his nightmare. 'No, this can't be happening! Not again!'
----"I'll take his punishment Gozaburo!" A man's face, filled with malice and evil, smiles in the dark, then breaks out laughing in that hideous laughter from before. "Done Seto! You shall take his place!"
----Seto's eyes snapped open and he sat straight up in bed, bare chest heaving in his effort to regain his breath. His eyes, wide in panic and fear, searched the room around him (never noticing his bleeding lip), and when they found nothing out of the ordinary, he got out of bed and slipped on a pair of loose shorts. After binding his ankles with workout bandages, he walked quietly out of the room and down the stairs to the basement levels. He opened a door, and walked into a dark room. After flipping the light switch, the florescent lights above revealed it to be a training room with all varieties of equipment stationed in various areas about the room. But he didn't want anything in there but one thing and one thing alone. Wrapping his hands in the thin workout tape as he walked, his eyes narrowed as he closed in on his target: a heavy punching bag, probably weighing at least one hundred and fifty pounds and definitely seen better days.
----Without stopping to get into position or stance, Seto reached back his left arm and punched the bag as hard as he could with his still waking strength. The black bag barely moved as he drew back his hand and countered with a right hook. Punches and kicks flew at the bag, one after another, increasing in strength and causing the bag to rock back and forth. The bag's metal harness/foundation started shifting closer and closer to the wall as the relentless onslaught continued.
----'Why?' he thought angrily as his strikes hit the bag with increasing force and sweat gleamed on his tense form. 'Why am I reliving that again? Why do I have to see his face again? I thought I was through with him after Battle City. Why do I have to remember what he did to me?!' Strikes landed harder as bits and pieces of memories flashed through his mind, memories of those five painful years with his step-father. Tears streamed down his face as the memories returned in larger pieces; his step-father standing over him, smiling that insane and domineering smile that he always had; Gozaburo clutching onto a seven year old Mokuba while a ten year old Seto pleaded with him to leave him alone...
----'He stole some of what little I had left then,' he thought bitterly, his rage drowning out the pain in his hands and bare feet as the cloth slowly seeped in blood coming from the scratches from the punching bag's uneven texture. But he felt nothing, only his rage and sorrow as he kept beating on the bag, the only way he knew how to release his emotions in their full form. But instead of going away, the emotions grew and fueled him even more 'And he almost took Mokuba, too. But I stopped that from happening by offering myself instead. Why was he like that though? Why did he have to do that to me? Why did he have to steal the innocence I had left?'
----A spinning heel kick landed wrong on the swinging bag, and the angle, as well as the momentum of the bag, made Seto lose his balance and fall to the ground on his hands and knees. But instead of getting up, he just sat there on the floor, tears streaming down his face. He just sat there, sobbing quietly so none could hear him. No one could, or would, come to help him anyway, right? Who would want to? He was no one: worse than those kids still stuck in the orphanage where he and Mokuba spent three years of their life. This life hadn't changed them for the better; it had sent them to the darkest depths of Hell and back... and Seto knew, even if he didn't know what he'd done, that he'd deserved all of it. Why else would those... unspeakable things have been done to him otherwise?
----"Seto, what's the matter?"
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----Jou lay in the dark for a bit, thinking about what had happened over the last couple of days. His room had always been empty when he woke up after Seto had confessed about knowing his secret, but every time one of his nightmares started, that cool feeling was still there, like someone holding out their hand to guide him out of the nightmare into peaceful sleep. That had never been there before he'd been attacked by those three goons at the docks, but it was there after, and almost every time the dreams came back. Now, they were almost a whisper in the back of his head, reminding him that they were still there, but so faint, he didn't think much of them anymore. But, why was Seto so worried about him like this? Was it because Yuugi was Jou's best friend and Seto was worried solely about Yuugi's state? He shook his head. 'Hardly,' he thought. 'He'd never have opened up like that if he was just worried about Yuugi. There's got to be something else to it...'
----A sudden, repeating noise cut through his thoughts. At first, it was pretty quiet, but then it grew a little louder each time. It sounded almost like someone was punching a wall in the lower levels of the house, but who would be doing that at this time of night? Curious, Jou gently tugged off the covers and slipped out of the bed with the grace and silence of a cat. His chest was bare, save for the bandages still covering his broken ribs, and soft, comfortable, navy sweatpants hung around his legs. He moved slowly and quietly down the halls and staircase, not making a sound; a habit and talent he had been practicing for the past week or so while everyone was asleep. When he reached the basement levels, the sounds got louder and he could hear it clearly: it was the sound of chains rattling, something soft being hit, and metal crashing against concrete and plaster. When he looked inside, he saw something he thought he'd never see.
----Seto was tearing apart a punching bag, his hands and feet bleeding from the constant friction and stress of his blows, his almost bare body gleaming with sweat. His upper body was completely bare, and the only actual article of clothing he seemed to have on was a pair of gray shorts covering down to his knees. The bag kept swinging back and forth, gaining more and more momentum each time it was struck. But what was amazing wasn't his strength, nor his perfect form, but the fact that tears were running down his face and that he didn't even seem to notice that he was injured. He just kept hitting the bag, as if beating it into oblivion could help ease his inner turmoil.
----Suddenly, after one of his kicks misfired, Seto fell to the floor. Jou expected him to get back up and continue beating the bag until it burst apart, but instead the brunette just sat there on the floor, his shoulders shaking and his tears and sweat pattering against the wooden flooring. Sympathetic, and a little curious, Jou walked silently through the doorway. "Seto?" he called quietly. "What's the matter?" The brunette didn't look up, but instead sat down, pulling his knees up to his chest. "Go away Jounouchi," he muttered. "Leave me be to deal with my own demons."
----"Ya know, that might just be your problem, Kaiba." Jou sat down next to him and the brunette lifted his eyes to Jou's face, one of calm and understanding instead of accusation. "You try so hard to do ev'rything by yourself that you forget what you have. I mean, no matter what your demons, there's someone in the world around you with the same ones. Ya just gotta look hard." Jou smiled slightly, looking off to the side and remembering how Yuugi had helped him feel better after his nightmares before the fight. "No one can understand exactly how you feel, Seto, but every once in a while, someone can relate."
----"The only person who knows anything is Mokuba," Seto muttered, "and he was too young to remember. All of the memories have been blocked out for him, the lucky kid." Seto half smiled, then winced when he felt the pain in his hands and feet set in. He straightened out his long legs just a bit so that he could see the extent of the damage on his feet, and Jou was able to see his face. "Jeez Kaiba!" he half shouted, cupping the other's jaw and turning Seto's face to meet his own. "You look worse than the last time I saw you! Haven't you been getting any sleep at all?" When Seto's eyes dropped and he jerked his jaw out of Jou's hand, Jou felt an unusual flicker of anger, and then he noticed Seto's bottom lip was cut and bleeding. The anger quickly died, replaced by bewilderment. "What happened to your face?" he asked quietly.
----"Nothing," Seto replied apathetically. "I'm fine, just go back-"
----"You're not fine and I won't go back to bed until you tell me what's wrong! I know I'm not one of those specially certified psychologists, but I still think I can help with your problems! Believe me, when you look like you haven't slept in weeks and went a round on yourself before beating a punching bag to the breaking point, something's wrong." Seto remained silent, until Jou grabbed his shoulders and shook him hard. "Seto Kaiba, if you don't tell me what's wrong, so help me God I'll-"
----"I had a nightmare, alright!" Seto shouted at him. "That's it! Now are you happy?" Jou stopped shaking him, but his hands remained on Seto's thin shoulders. "That's not everything, Kaiba, I know it isn't," he muttered. "If it was just one, you'd be back on your feet in a few hours. How long has it been going on?" When Seto didn't answer, Jou shook him once. "How long?!"
----"Almost two weeks," the other murmured, so quiet Jou could barely hear him. "And it's not just any nightmare; it's a form of night terrors that I know I can't rid myself of. I can't eat, I can't sleep, I can barely pay attention at my office... The only time I felt at peace was when I was sitting next to you in your room for the first weeks you were here, when I was trying to help you get over your nightmares." Jou was shocked, but didn't have time to say anything, as Seto seemed to have lost control of what he was saying and just continued on. "I know that we're not all that different anymore, Jounouchi. We had the same past, different places, yes, but the same pain, the same unspeakable torment. One of the only differences is that your physical abuse is still going on, while mine stopped two years ago."
----"What? You mean that..." Jou sentence died as fresh tears flowed down Seto's cheeks, and yet the other smiled, even in the midst of remembering all of his pain. "Yeah, Jou," he muttered. "You got it; my step-father raped me for five years, all because I didn't want Mokuba to live with those scars."
----"He went after Mokuba first?" Seto nodded and Jou half smiled. "Ya know," he continued, moving slightly closer to him, "you may think that whatever triggered it was your fault, or that you were a coward to just accept it instead of fighting back, but listen to me: none of it was your fault, and you're the bravest guy I know." When the other looked at him, slightly confused, Jou only half-heartedly smiled and stared at the floor.
----"You protected your brother from that, and that takes sheer devotion and bravery. Me, I didn't have my sister to protect by then, and I just took it, too scared to do anything about it." Tears formed at the edges of Jou's eyes and he continued. "I know that it wasn't really my fault, but I couldn't get over it. Every time it happens, all I can think about was that first time, and how much worse this one is... and how I'm too weak to stop it. But ya see, you dealt with it, and held out 'till the end, and then made a better life for you and your brother. That takes guts, and I can see how you think we're the same now. Even our night terrors are alike in certain ways, but I could never tough mine out like you did. I had no justification for just taking my... beatings. You are prob'ly the only guy I know who's ever done something like this, and that's a lot coming from me." The tears dropped then, just two small droplets on the hardwood flooring and twin trails down Jou's cheeks. "But ya see what I mean about opening up, Kaiba? It kinda helps to know you have another guy in your situation. It helps you listen to your own advice and help not only yourself, but someone else." He turned his dark chocolate eyes to Seto's face once again and smiled half-heartedly at seeing that he had the CEO's full attention. "Why don't we get your face and hands cleaned up, 'kay?" he asked, voice kind and somewhat back to normal. "It wouldn't do to well to have Mokuba see you like this."
----Seto just looked at the blonde next to him as he'd told his story, and realization slowly dawned on him. Jou was someone who actually cared about everyone around him but himself, and he wasn't that big, tough-guy he'd always pretended to be. He was just like him; a scared kid who didn't see how life could get better than the Hell he was already in, but he had toughed it out, while Jou was still stuck in the misery and abusive world that was all he knew outside of his small circle of friends. When the tears had dropped from his face, Seto watched them fall to the floor, and then turned his eyes back to their prior owner, guilt and slight dawning came to him. Why had he picked on him all this time, teased him and taunted him when he didn't even know the full story. When Jou turned his face back to Seto's, he knew that he had to do something to help Jou, no matter the cost.
----At Jou's last comment, Seto smirked slightly. "Mokuba's seen me in worse shape," he muttered. Jou's smile grew, just a little. "That," he replied, "is hard to believe."
----"It's true. The whole part of Battle City, I was a nervous wreck. I didn't eat or sleep from start to finish on that project."
----"But I bet you didn't look like you'd gone three rounds with a pro boxer then." Seto chuckled slightly and smiled at Jou, a real one this time, nothing cynical or snide about it. "No, that I did not, although I did hear that every once in a while, it seemed like I wasn't all there." Suddenly, the wall built to harness all his emotions broke and a wave of despair, grief, and sadness overcame him, and he lifted one hand to his face, sobbing. All his control was gone, and he couldn't help it; he remembered everything, could almost feel it all happening again, all of the emotions bottled up for years spilled out, as if the bottle had gotten overfilled and had exploded, shattering his control over his emotions.
----At Seto's outburst of sobs, Jou did the only thing that made any sense at all; he wrapped his arms carefully around Seto's shoulders and hugged him, whispering calmly in his ear and letting him cry it out. Seto himself didn't know why this helped but it did and after a few minutes, his breaths returned to a normal pace and his shaking stopped altogether. He just sat there for a minute, and even as his head said that this wasn't right, it just felt right to him and he didn't move until Jou pulled back. "Better now?" the blonde asked kindly. "It really helps to let it out now and then, doesn't it?" Seto nodded and smiled at him, almost making him seem shy and a little sheepish. Almost.
----"Well, good then," Jou replied, hooking his arm around Seto's waist and pulling him up to his feet. "Now what's say we get you presentable for tomorrow?"
----"Whatever you say, Doctor Jounouchi," was the half sarcastic, half comedic response, and it did its job. Jou chuckled to himself as he helped Seto walk out of the room and up the stairs to the upper levels of the house.
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----"Hold still! This doesn't hurt that bad!"
----"But Jou-"
----"No 'buts'. Now hold still!" Jou grabbed Seto's chin firmly, but gently, and applied the peroxide to the minor wound. Seto hissed in a breath at the sudden, but brief pain that died as quickly as it started. When Jou let go of his jaw, he jerked backwards and shot the blonde a deathly glare, which, of course, Jou laughed at. "Dun gimme that look, Seto Kaiba. And don't lick your lips either, that'll be a really foul surprise if you do." Seto didn't reply, but simply settled for glaring relentlessly at Jounouchi as the other took off the remains of the hand bandages and whistled the sight. "Damn, you've almost worn these down to the bone. Careful you don't, or these fingers may never type again, let alone at your record-breaking speed." With a wet towel, he carefully wiped away the drying blood on Seto's hands, and tsked at the scrapes. "Get thicker wraps, Kaiba," he muttered as he went about dabbing peroxide on the raw knuckles, while Seto just watched him do so without complaint. When Jou realized this, he looked up at the teen, grinning that big and goofy smile. Seto cocked an eyebrow at this. "What's that look for?" he asked.
----"Ya know, I know for a fact that having peroxide rubbed on deeper wounds hurts more than shallow ones, yet you ain't complaining. Now why is that?" Seto blinked and looked off at the floor as Jou started on his other hand, blushing slightly. "I just...don't like people touching my face," he said quietly. "It's a thing I've had since I was young." When Jou looked up at his eyes, they were still cast downward and his face was still slightly pink. Jou nodded and replied, "I get it, no worries. He got your face a lot?"
----"In a way, yeah."
----"I'm actually pretty amazed though." When Seto looked back at him, Jou smiled and started on Seto's torn up feet. "I mean, he had to have been sober, or you extremely lucky, for him not to damage that nice mug of yours."
----"I'm guessing you were lucky?"
----"Yeah, and the fact that I knew how to duck and move my head so I wouldn't get any permanent damage."
----"That would've helped a lot, then." Jou smiled a bit, but not like before; this time it was sad and a little insecure. "Yeah, it would've," he replied quietly. "But all the knowledge of fighting arts in the world won't help against the verbal curveballs they throw at you. Those hurt the worst." Seto searched his face to see something hidden under the mask of concentration that he wore while he looked over the bleeding feet and cleaned them. He looked like the doctor at the hospital, muttering to himself as he cleaned up the wounds with ease and shaking his head, as if he couldn't believe one guy could hurt himself so much. "You know that the only reason I teased you was to get the reaction, right?" he asked quietly. Jou shrugged. "In a way, yeah," he replied.
----"He did the same, didn't he?" Jou paused and finished rewrapping Seto's feet in fresh bandages. "Yeah," he whispered when he finally finished. "Even if he didn't say it, you did." With confirmation of his fear, Seto bowed his head in shame, yet another emotion Jou had never seen from him. "I'm sorry," Seto said, voice barely audible as if he were afraid someone would hear.
----"Go back to bed, Kaiba. Get some sleep." When he looked up, Jou was on his way out the door. At the door, Jou turned back with a dark look on his face. "You need it," he finished, and then he was gone, leaving Seto once again alone in the dark, a darkness he knew, and feared, he could never escape until Jounouchi did.
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Sabriel: Finite!
Hiei: --still sipping Guinness-- You're not done yet.
Sabriel: With this chappie I am.
Hiei: It wasn't all that good or interesting.
Sabriel: --sticks tongue out at him--
Hiei: --rolls eyes-- Ruining the mood again.
Sabriel: Damn. Ah well, R&R people.
Hiei: We will accept flames.
Sabriel: --rolls eyes-- Only if they are constructive criticism.
Hiei: Whatever.