Falsity
Just A Penniless Writer

Part 12: An Increase in Potency

When the Auror returned to the room, the Interviewee looked up with more than a little smugness.

"Ah, my water. Finally, someone shows a bit of civility. I was beginning to believe the Ministry to be peopled entirely of barbarians."

The Auror frowned but otherwise handed the poor quality goblet over to the Interviewee without comment.

When his keeper made no move to continue the interview, Draco put down the emptied goblet and smirked grandly.

"I'm supposing from your expression that you heard on your excursion out of the room some bit of controversial news from Granger's interrogation. What was it? Snape's wedding gift? Mother's tea time with Granger? Or perhaps it was Potter and Weasley's involvement towards the end."

When the Auror lifted puzzled eyes to face the youngest Malfoy, Draco's smirk only widened.

"Did you really believe Granger could seriously hide anything from those two bumbling idiots? They may be complete imbeciles, but even I have to admit that constant paranoia does eventually have its pay off. In this case, Granger was acting more than a bit suspiciously by simply not being at Hogwarts. It was really only a matter of time before they started getting curious. I'm only pleased I wasn't forced into that mess."

He would have shivered but that was behaviour unbecoming of a Malfoy. Now that his father had raised the bar, he had much to live up to.

It took less than a week before Lucius was very securely under Hermione's thumb, a triumph which could only be considered Monumental.

Of course, Lucius didn't see it quite like that, but that was only because he was so very misguided in believing he could ever gain control of her. Hermione thought his insistent belief that she was very securely under his thumb quite adorable.

She was almost considering resting on her laurels (because surely there could be no challenge as great as subduing Lucius Malfoy). However, she was hardly content to dawdle or rest at all. Resting was for the weak, and she would not be happily married to a former Death Eater were she weak.

No, now was the time for the next challenge. The challenge that she came upon one day while stealthily returning back to her quarters at Hogwarts promised to be almost as difficult as marrying Lucius.

"Hermione."

"Harry. Ron. It is near midnight, and you are without your Cloak. You had better get back to your room before Filch finds you."

"It is near midnight and you are just now returning to castle. You had better explain."

"I was in the li-"

"We checked the library."

And Merlin help her if Ron didn't sound petulant that he'd actually had to visit the library.

"You wouldn't understand."

"Try us."

"It's... Come inside, would you? I hardly wish to explain to the hallway."

Once she had ushered the boys into her room, she immediately set about preparing herself for what was surely going to be an interesting experience. For the boys, she poured some decaffeinated tea. Adding a pinch of her own concoction was an added precaution. For herself, it was one discreet sip of Unctuous Unction with a pinch of prevalence powder. Only then she was ready to face the issue at hand.

The Issue at Hand was still busy admiring the chamber she'd wrangled for herself from the Headmaster when she had first learned she had not been granted the Head Girl title. While she knew for a fact she was not sociable enough for such a role, nor did she really have the time, she'd had her eye on the Head Girl room for years. Luckily, it only took four hours of 'discussion' before the Headmaster relented and granted approval for a private room of her own.

It seemed that she was always managing Successes of Such Magnitude, and she only wondered what could possibly top her most recent Success. Perhaps overtaking the Ministry? Ah, but that would have to wait until a better day. NEWTs were far too taxing for such a thing right now.

"Now," she said resolutely while handing the tea cups to the boys. "What is it you wish to know?"

"What the bloody hell have you been doing?"

"Drink your tea. This is going to take awhile."

"It smells funny."

"It's herbal. Drink it."

"It tastes funny."

"Drink it or I won't tell you."

Both boys gave her a suspicious look but emptied their cups regardless. She grinned. It was nice to still be trusted. Hopefully, her efforts would ensure that she keep that trust. It wouldn't do to end up in the same frightful political position as Lucius when there was still so far she could go.

"Now," she began again. "Where to begin..."

"The beginning?"

"That's a terrible place to start, Ron. Really, everything is much more interesting in the middle."

The boys gave her a dumbfounded look, so she continued. It was her hope that they would remain confused the entire evening, and therefore be unable to become suitably angry once they learned of her new status.

"Perhaps you are right, this once. Not quite the beginning, but still… Ron, do you remember that week right after the war when we tried to date?"

"Yes…"

"Remember how miserable we were?"

"Yes…"

"Remember how, when we both came to our senses, you said I probably needed someone a lot more intellectually challenging?"

"I didn't quite say that…"

"Actually, you said 'Good luck finding a bloke that will give a damn to any of that rubbish you say', but that was generally what you meant and I forgive you for your callousness."

Still dumbfounded. Good.

"What I mean to say is that I have discovered a way of ensuring that certain expected individuals do not take certain expected actions in light of all that has occurred after the war. Additionally, I have found a man who finds my 'rubbish' taxing but cannot afford not to listen."

"Um… You mean to say that you're making sure at least one idiotic former Death Eater doesn't try to relive the glory days by boring him to death?"

"Precisely, though I do prefer my own explanation."

"How?"

"Through very particular, though legal means I assure you, I have managed to bind him to me."

"How? The Unbreakable Oath?"

"Absolutely not. I have every belief that he would have figured a way around it. I was looking for more of a long term solution."

"What kind of long term solution?"

"Matrimony."

They stared blankly at her for so long she thought perhaps she had added a bit too much Confundus essence to their tea.

"You…"

"You're married?"

She nodded sharply, giving every indication of maturity and decisiveness. It wouldn't pay for them to start doubting her now.

"I apologize for not inviting you, but it might have sparked a bit of resistance in him. He hasn't been completely under my control until recently."

"But… Hermione… You're married?"

"Yes, Ron. Married. It was the least I could do to prevent another war."

"Hermione, you didn't have to—"

"I assure you, I did have to, Harry. After speaking with him, I realized it was the only option."

They were silent as the boys adjusted to the information she had just provided. However, they were intuitive if nothing else, even considering the assorted potions they were under, and the question came before long.

"So… Who?"

"Malfoy."

"You married Draco? No wonder he's been looking so defeated…"

"No, actually."

"Then who?"

"His father."

She counted exactly four seconds before they exploded.

"Lucius Malfoy!" Harry first then. She had given him only a forty percent likelihood of exploding first, but then he was always good at throwing off her calculations.

"But—" Now Ron joined in, but he wasn't quite as loud as usual. The tea seemed to be working after all. She congratulated herself on thinking to add the Calming essence.

"We never would have asked you—" And there was Harry, jumping to conclusions and feeling guilty despite that she had never once acknowledged that he had anything to do with this.

"Lucius Malfoy!" And there was Ron, as articulate as usual. Perhaps she should have added more Calming essence.

She gave them another three minutes of spluttering before continuing onward.

"Yes, Lucius Malfoy. I assure you, it was not what I had in mind when I first came upon him, but I soon found there was little choice in the matter. You can rest assured that I have taken every precaution and have found means to keep him in line."

Harry was quiet now, merely staring at her with that unreadable yet completely disapproving expression. Ron had chosen the route of incredulity.

"You can't be serious."

Instead of arguing with him further, she disenchanted her rather tacky wedding ring and presented it without flourish.

"Do you know he had to remove eighteen different Dark charms from the ring before I could even consider wearing it? Apparently, it's never been on the finger of a Muggleborn before."

"Merlin! That rock is the size of a Grindylow!"

"Not quite. A bit annoying though. Always in the way, and I had to charm it to stay straight on my finger. It kept twisting around, scratching my parchment while I worked."

"Is that the Malfoy crest?"

"Yes. A bit ostentatious, don't you think? All the snakes and dragons and such. But he simply wouldn't hear of getting a different ring. Maybe next month."

She made the mistake of ignoring the boys while she eyed the ring with a dissatisfied expression. It really was in poor taste, and it seemed to be the only point of contention she was unlikely to win. While she was thusly occupied, the boys turned to each other and seemed to, in the strangely psychic way that boys of similar dispositions are able to do, reach a decision with a simple look and drew their wands.

"Incarcerous!"

When Hermione found herself bound together by Gryffindor coloured ropes, she vowed that the next time she drugged the boys' tea, she would increase the potency. Obviously this formula was flawed.

"And what exactly do you mean to do now?" she said irritably, drawing on all her reserves of patience to prevent a full out massacre. After all, it would only damage her Plans to end up in Azkaban for killing the Boy Who Lived.

"Merlin, Harry. She sounds just like him now!"

"For all we know, she is him. We're all going to sit right here and wait for the Polyjuice to wear off. Then we'll know what to do."

She sighed but knew there was nothing for it. It was just a matter of waiting until they finally accepted the truth of what she'd told them.

It was going to be a long night.

"And how did Mr. Potter take the news of your marriage to his rival's father?"

Hermione stared at the Auror pointedly.

"How do you think he took it? It took hours of arguments and occasional spells before he would even consider believing me. When it did set in, it took a full day before he could look at me again."

"And what of Helen?"

"Oh, it took them half of that first night just to come to the realization that I was, in fact, Helen, and another several hours for them to drag out all their ragged copies of the Daily Prophet in which Helen was mentioned and match them up to their own knowledge of my absences. Really, I was quite impressed with how professional they were being. Certainly more so than the Ministry."

"And then, Miss Granger?"

"It was only then that they found truth in what I was saying. It was only then they realized that I am married to Lucius Malfoy and am not under any sort of mind control or unethical persuasion. I am very pleased with the turns my life has taken in regards to my dear husband. The only portion of this entire ordeal that I regret is having to sit through this farce of an interview."

"Calm down, Miss Granger."

"I see no point. If you have more questions regarding Harry's response, I suggest asking him when he returns from his vacation – vacation I provided, for your information."

"Disposing of evidence, were you?"

"I did no such thing! Harry mentioned a few days ago how terribly disenchanted he was with school. Considering all the work he missed due to interviews and the like, I agreed that a trip would be best. I owe him my life and his friendship – it was the least I could do to get him some time to think."

"We shall see," the Auror said snidely. Hermione arched her brow as her ire rose to an unheard level. The spectators could only guess that some of her new acquaintances' attitudes and afflictions had been transferred to her.

"That is enough. Now… you have five more minutes until I walk out that door to find my husband. Chose your questions wisely."

"By now, you've come to determine that all paperwork regarding my marriage to Hermione is correct and in order. You have no proof of treachery else I would be in Azkaban already. Furthermore, the media has no doubt caught on to the happenings within these rooms and is pressuring for some sort of announcement."

The Auror frowned. It was the first expression that Lucius thought the man did halfway well. All others were rubbish and should never be attempted by the man again.

"If I know my dear wife, which I can assure you I do, she is even now clamouring for freedom. I am not one to instruct her in increasing her reserves of patience. I suggest you finish quickly before you find yourself unemployed."