Chase soared higher and higher into the sky, plunging into the immaculate grayness engulfing her. The stormy sky challenged her, taunting her to dare try to tame it. She weaved through a foreboding cloud, her hair now slick and dripping as she continued upward.
"Chase get down here this instant!" Jenina ordered, flailing her broomstick high above her head. Chase felt bad for upsetting Jenina, but right now, she couldn't be bothered with her silly rules. If she wanted to fly in a thunderstorm, she would. No one could stop her…they were all too afraid to fly up to get her. Besides, she needed to be alone, she needed to be completely alone.
The cool rain stung Chase's face and she could no longer remember if her face was soaked from the raindrops or her own tears. She needed to cry about Sirius, and she certainly couldn't cry to her friends. That would have been extremely out of character. And she hated acting out of character.
She tried everything the past month to tear her mind off of Sirius, but she was fighting a futile battle. She couldn't stop thinking about him and his new girlfriend Calista Beamer. Calista was a sweet enough girl, a little too sweet in Chase's opinion, with wavy blonde hair and porcelain skin. She had perfectly arched blonde eyebrows, cute dimples that showed perfectly when she smiled, and full, high cheekbones. She was a fourth year Ravenclaw with extraordinary marks in school, popular amongst students of all ages, and an altogether genuinely nice girl.
Chase wanted to drag her by her blonde hair, spin her from it, and let her soar through the sky, and put so much fear into her, that she'd pray the Whomping Willow got to her before Chase finished.
But, of course, Chase didn't mind Sirius having a new girlfriend. Not at all.
"Chase!" a familiar masculine voice echoed. "Chase don't be stupid!"
Chase's grim mood softened at the sound of the voice. Sirius sounded worried about her. Then her dark eyebrows narrowed. Good, she thought, let him worry.
Elevating her broomstick higher, she felt her skin numb, and her raw, frigid fingers seemed stuck to the broomstick handle. Shaking these petty worries from her head, Chase continued onward, not sure where she was going or what she was trying to accomplish.
Stopping nearly 300 feet in the air, Chase let out a deep breath. But suddenly, it was hard to breath. Suddenly her lungs seemed to have been crushed. She looked down, her vision blurring. Her blue fingers were shaking and they throbbed. Chase felt her body fall off of her broom, and before she tumbled below, she grasped its handle tightly between her fingers.
XxX
Jenina had followed Chase out of the dormitory earlier that night, eager to practice Quidditch. But Chase seemed extremely disinterested, which Jenina found odd. Why else would her broomstick be hung over her shoulder?
Jenina flew around chasing Chase for awhile, finally giving up, satisfied that Chase wanted to be alone. She picked up her Quidditch supplies and locked them in the equipment room. When she emerged, she felt the rain drops on her arms, and warned Chase not to stay out too much longer.
An hour after Jenina had returned to the Common Room, she noticed it was storming and Chase still hadn't come back. Worried, Jenina rushed back outside alarmed to see Chase still zooming around on her broomstick. She ordered her to come inside, but Chase blocked her out in her usual vacant manner.
After the thunder began striking, Jenina began to panic. What if something terrible happened to her? She decided she needed to go for help, but before she could return to the castle, Sirius was by her side. It shocked her to see him of all people, but she didn't question him. She quickly explained what had happened, and Sirius told her to go back inside; he could handle Chase. Jenina nodded, but was a bit reluctant to leave Chase. It wasn't that she didn't trust Sirius, but she was worried Chase was too angry at him to listen. But Sirius grew agitated and demanded that she leave, and Jenina, already soaked thoroughly, could muster up no more strength to argue.
She left Sirius and returned to her dormitory where she changed into warm clothes. She had an inclination to peer out the window to search for Chase and Sirius, but she shook the thought from her head, and ambled back down to the Common Room.
Sirius didn't hesitate once he saw her figure stumble. He leapt upon his own broomstick and sped towards Chase. She began falling at a rapid pace and Sirius urged his broom forward. He caught her with difficulty, as she sent her arms flailing, and upon seeing him proceeded to push him away.
"Chase, do you want to fall?" he hissed, allowing her to fully view the 100 or so feet below them. Coming to her senses, Chase clung a little more tightly to him, swinging her broomstick at her side. Her vision was still slightly blurred, and in spite of her urge to want to whack Sirius with her broom, her entire body felt too weak to protest any longer.
Sirius silently led them to the ground, setting Chase down on her feet. Chase stumbled under the weight of her own body, her knees crumbling and pulling her downward. Sirius gripped her firmly around the waist and heaved her into his arms, setting their brooms into the equipment room, locking the door as he left.
Sirius attempted any means possible to wake Chase up, patting her cheeks firmly and trying to talk to her. Finally accepting that she was not about to wake up, Sirius clutched her tightly and headed back inside. "You better be okay damn it," he muttered.
Sirius flew up the staircases leading to the Gryffindor Tower, and barely muttered the password when the Fat Lady flung open the portrait hole, concerned about the girl in his arms. Pushing himself into the Common Room, Sirius set Chase down, spotting Lily and Alice half asleep in comfy armchairs.
The two awoke instantly as he called them, the only ones left in the Common Room.
"Is she all right?" Lily asked in concern.
Sirius nodded. "She will be."
"We should change her clothes," Lily said to Alice. "These wet ones won't do."
Alice nodded, helping Lily prop Chase up between the two of them.
"Thanks Sirius," Lily added as they slumped up the staircase.
Sirius nodded then added, "You might want to sleep down here with her. The fireplace will keep her warm."
The girls nodded and disappeared into their dormitory. Sirius heaved a sigh of relief.
XxX
At two in the morning, Sirius reappeared in the Common Room, unable to sleep. He knew full well why, but he denied his reasoning, deciding to sit out and talk to Lily and Alice if they were still awake.
As he neared the fireplace, he saw Alice and Lily wrapped around arm chairs, their heads hanging off, hair brushing the floor. He would obviously not be doing much talking tonight.
He crept over to the couch where Chase lay, covered in warm fleece blankets. He leaned upon the arm of the couch near her head, stroking her satiny ebony hair as she slept.
He spoke to her slowly, pouring his heart out to her. He told her about how terrified he was that she might have died that night. He talked about how much he wished they were still together. He apologized for hurting her repeatedly. He whispered how much he still loved her. He didn't, though, explain why he didn't return to her, why he kept away from her.
He sat for hours, just studying her sleeping body. He knew the curve of her face, and he brushed a finger across her cheek lovingly, half hoping she'd awake and embrace him, half fearing this fantasy.
At last, it was morning, and Sirius began to hear the early morning stirrings of the students. They would rouse and stumble down to the Common Room soon, waking the girls. He couldn't be caught down here.
Sirius got to his feet as Chase stretched across the couch, catlike, pushing the heap of blankets off of her and onto the floor. Sirius smiled at the picture and knelt down and kissed her forehead. He opened his mouth, debating whether or not to speak, and whispered a muffled "I love you," and then disappeared.
"I love you too," Chase murmured, opening her eyes. She blinked with uncertainty. What was going on? She could have sworn…
She shook her head. She had such a weird dream. And it had seemed so real. She thought Sirius had sat with her and talked to her. He said he loved her! She remembered. She forced these thoughts out of her head. None of this was true. She couldn't keep thinking such things.
Alice and Lily peered over her both grinning. Had Chase just waken the sight of her friends both smiling wide like clowns would have probably scared her to death.
"You all right?" Alice asked, sliding down next to her.
Chase nodded. "I think so…what…"
"Happened?" Lily finished. "I don't know the details. Jenina came in and said that you were flying in the storm…and that Sirius was trying to get you down. We were going to run out after you, but she told us not to. So we waited here and Sirius brought you in. We took you upstairs and changed your clothes, then brought you back down here. We figured the fire would keep you warmer."
Chase nodded, the night suddenly flooding back to her. "Did he say anything?"
Lily shook her head. "He just went to bed."
Chase nodded. It was definitely a dream then. She was insane to think Sirius was still harboring any feelings towards her.
Students began filing down to the Common Room, and Alice and Lily left to get dressed. Chase decided she should get up and shower. Grabbing the blankets she must have tossed onto the floor during the course of the night, she threw them onto the couch. In the process a piece of metal flew at her, attacking her toe. Chase knelt down and picked it up, studying it. A slow smile crept across her face. It was Sirius's class ring. She must have dropped it when…
Her smile broadened. So it hadn't been a dream.
XxX
An hour later, Chase emerged from her dormitory, a robin's egg blue blouse and white slacks clinging to her body. She had let her hair air dry, and it now hung almost dry over her shoulders, in soft, slight waves. She felt better than she had it days. She now knew Sirius still loved her.
Bustling down the steps, Chase felt light and airy, and floated all the way downstairs to the Great Hall for breakfast. She took a seat between Lily and a third year named Maggie, and was surprised to find her normal appetite had returned. Flipping heaps of pancakes onto her plate, she surveyed the table and found the seats across from her vacant. Apparently Sirius and the gang hadn't arrived for breakfast yet.
"Wow," Lily said, gawking at Chase's plate, which was now piled with not only pancakes, but mounds of bacon and home fries, and a buttered biscuit on the side. "Someone's hungry."
Alice rolled her eyes and laughed. "Please, Chase always eats like this."
Chase and Lily exchanged looks and Chase knew Lily had noticed her decrease in appetite. Chase brushed Lily's look off and returned her attention to her food.
Ten minutes later, James and the gang stumbled into the Great Hall, crashing on the seats across from the girls. Chase nonchalantly gazed upward and saw Peter, Remus, and James. Her eyes trailed to the right and then she saw Sirius. Her heart leapt. She wondered if he would act any different towards her.
Sirius took his seat next to James and turned his attention to his second love, food. Chase occasionally looked up, hoping to meet eyes with him, but he never even looked in her direction.
While the others engaged in a light conversation making fun of Professor Fudge, Chase sat back, not really listening, but trying to figure out how to tell Sirius what she had heard. Should she tell him? He had made it obvious by his actions that he wasn't about to rush up to her and tell her.
"Chase!" a feminine voice called. "You okay?"
Chase turned to see Jenina rushing towards them. "Yeah, I'm fine. Sorry about…"
"You gave me such a fright!" Jenina said, her tone noticeably harsher. "Don't you ever do that again! I mean if Sirius hadn't come out and helped you…"
"Sirius?" James questioned. "Wait, what happened Chase?"
Chase shook her head. "It was nothing."
"No, it wasn't nothing!" Jenina remarked loudly, grabbing the attention of a few other Gryffindors. "Sirius…"
Sirius cleared his throat, not wanting Jenina to make a huge deal of this. "I just helped Chase last night. She lost control of her broom, it was raining, and I was walking by. Chase is right, it was nothing."
Chase nodded in agreement although secretly stung by the words.
"Oh," James said.
"Wait," Remus began. "Is that why you were staring out the window yesterday evening?"
"You were watching me?" Chase asked.
"No, I wasn't!" Sirius snapped, flying onto his feet.
"Okay, okay," James said, patting Sirius on the back. He pushed Sirius back into seat and handed him his fork. "Just calm down and eat. Remus doesn't know what he's talking about."
Sirius nodded as he grabbed his fork.
"Hey," James said. "You lose your ring?"
Sirius looked down at the finger which normally sported his class ring. He had it on when he went to bed last night.
"Yeah Sirius, where is your ring?" Chase's voice echoed through him and he knew instantly where it was. "You never take it off."
Sirius stood up, unable to remain in Chase's presence anymore. "It was nothing," he mouthed to her alone as he turned to leave. Chase's eyes followed him as he rounded the Ravenclaw table, grabbing Calista.
Chase threw down her utensils in anger. How dare he! After last night…he…he was still...
Her anger heightened as she watched Sirius lead Calista out of the Great Hall. Chase marched after them, slamming open the doors to the Great Hall and catching everyone's attention. She sped up her pace until she was just a few feet away from the couple. She hurried up to them, tapping Sirius's shoulder.
He spun around and Chase imagined punching him square in the face. But it would have been too easy and too predictable. Instead she unclenched his fist and placed his ring in it, closing it again with ease. "I was awake," she whispered so Calista couldn't hear her.
With that said, Chase turned on her heel and walked up the staircase to the Gryffindor Tower. She had been childish to think that Sirius would leave Calista for her. Calista was, after all, the perfect girlfriend. She was beautiful and smart, and too amiable to argue with Sirius. She let him do as he pleased, never accusing him of anything, always trusting and believing him. Why wouldn't he continue liking that?
Angry now with no one but herself, Chase shouted "Skiddleworts" at the top of her lungs, scaring the Fat Lady and throwing her into a frenzy. At last, the portrait hole swung open and Chase ran inside, collapsing on a bundle of throw pillows strewn in front of the fireplace. Gathering a blanket around her body, Chase decided not to go to any of her classes today. She would tell her professors she was sick from the night before. Come to think of it, she was a little sick. Her cheeks were bright red and her forehead was a bit warmer than usual. But, she shrugged it off, assuming the warm heat escalating from the fire was causing her body temperature to rise. Not wanting to think about Sirius anymore, Chase closed her eyes and drifted off to sleep, a kind of restless sleep that allowed her subconscious to lay awake while her body rested.
Not even fifteen minutes later, Sirius burst into the Common Room, anger written all over his face. He stormed over to Chase, mouth open wide, ready to scream at her. But he stopped instantly upon viewing her. She was shivering and yet her forehead was sweating. Was she sick? Perhaps from the cold last night? Sirius knelt down, scooping her up.
Chase's eyes popped open and she tried to push Sirius away. "Get off of me!" she insisted, but Sirius didn't listen and set her down on the couch.
"I don't want your help," Chase yelled, trying to punch him off of her, her fists weak and barely hurting Sirius as he covered her with a blanket.
"Are you feeling all right?" Sirius asked, ignoring her muffled protests to his aid.
Chase's eyes narrowed.
"I meant physically," Sirius sighed. "You can't blame this all on me."
"And why not?" Chase snapped. "You were the one all over that Veela girl before! And you were the one who decided it was more essential to protect your precious reputation than your relationship! And…"
"Okay, okay, fine," Sirius remarked. "You can blame it all on me. But I never meant to hurt you. You have to believe that."
"Well then what exactly did you mean to do?" Chase asked, refusing to cry. She wouldn't give Sirius that much satisfaction."
"Look, it doesn't matter anymore Chase," Sirius insisted. "We've both moved on and…"
"How can you say that," Chase asked, "after what you said last night?"
Sirius's body tensed.
"I heard every word," Chase said, sitting up. "But you never did tell me why."
Sirius sighed. "Do you want me to tell you?"
"Yes!" Chase insisted impatiently.
"It doesn't change anything," he added.
"If that's what you want," Chase offered quietly.
Sirius plopped down next to Chase. "I just…I get scared sometimes," he admitted softly. "I'm afraid of losing you. And you've been going through so much lately…I just don't know how to help you without making it worse."
Chase smiled slightly, her eyes now glistening with tears threatening to fall. "You've never made it worse…you just always have this way of…I don't know…making me feel better."
Sirius grinned. "Really?"
Chase nodded. "Would I lie to you?"
Sirius continued. "And…we were just fighting so much…I thought it would be better if I wasn't in your life to complicate things…"
"You never…" Chase began, wiping away a stray tear.
"I guess my thinking was wrong," Sirius said, shrugging. "It looks like I hurt you even more."
Chase bit her lip. "I guess so." She turned away from him, pretending to have become very interested in her shoes. "I guess you should get back to Calista."
"Do you want me to?" he asked.
"Does it matter?" she retorted.
They sat in silence for a few moments, the air heavy, tense, and hard to swallow.
"Yes," Sirius said at last. Chase looked up to meet his glance. "Of course it matters Chase. You know I still love you."
"But Calista…"
"She'll get over it," Sirius said. "But if I stayed with her, I'd never get over you. And I don't ever want to."
Chase beamed as he moved closer to her. "You mean that?"
Sirius stole her own words. "Would I lie to you?"
She laughed as she hugged him, a relieved, happy, and emotional laugh that somehow matched the flow of her tears.
"I should go talk to Calista," Sirius said when they pulled apart. "I want to tell her as soon as I can."
Chase nodded understandingly. "But don't you ever break my heart like that again Sirius Black. Or next time I'll make it hell for you."
Sirius grinned and kissed away a tearstain on her cheek. "You're amazing," he whispered, disappearing.
Chase sat alone waiting for him to return, strangled tears still escaping from her eyes. But this time a smile shown across her face.
XxX
Sorry about this MUCH overdue chapter. My computer completely crashed for a few months, and all of my fanfic work was destroyed. It was upsetting. But, I'm back! Next chapter soon! And this time I mean it!