Abbey got on stage and cleared her throat. "Now, lets kick off my new story with one of my favorite songs! I've changed the words a little, but you should recognize the song. If you don't just look at the title of this chapter." She turned to Sokka and Mai, who were now dressed in modern day clothes. "Are you two ready?" she asked ecstatically.
"I'm used to singing, but not with the enemy." Sokka said, and glared at his singing partner.
"And I'm used to singing, but not about this!" Mai screamed. She was fuming, and her face was red.
"Well, this is the most expressive I've ever seen you, Mai, so maybe doing this song was for the better! Begin!" Victoria started playing the piano, and the first two victims to Abbey's torture began to sing. Ty Lee and Jet awaited behind the curtain for them to come in and help with the song.
Mai:
The samples won't delay,
but the cables-
Sokka:
There's another way.
Say something; anything.
Mai (into a microphone):
Test 1, 2, 3 . . .
Sokka:
Anything but that.
Mai:
This is weird.
Sokka:
It's weird.
Mai:
Very weird.
Sokka:
Fucking weird.
Mai:
I'm so mad
that I don't know what to do.
Fighting with microphones,
freezing down to my bones,
and to top it all off:
I'm with you!
Sokka:
Feel like going insane?
Got a fire in your brain?
And you're thinking of drinking gasoline?
Mai:
As a matter of fact-
Sokka:
Honey, I know this act.
It's called "The Tango: Ty Lee"
The Tango: Ty Lee!
It's a dark dizzy merry-go-round!
As she keeps you dangling
Mai
(spoken):
You're wrong!
Sokka:
Your heart she
is mangling
Mai (spoken):
It's different with
me!
Sokka:
And you toss and you turn
'cause her
cold eyes can burn.
Yet you yearn and you churn
and rebound!
Mai:
I think I know
what you mean . . .
Both:
The Tango: Ty
Lee!
Sokka:
Has she ever pouted her lips
and
called you 'pookie?'
Mai (spoken):
Never
Sokka:
Have
you ever
doubted a kiss or two?
Mai:
This
is . . . spooky.
Did you swoon when she walked through the
door?
Sokka:
Every time,
so be cautious.
Mai:
Did she moon
over other boys?
Sokka:
More than moon .
Mai:
I'm
getting nauseous.
Sokka and Mai threw off their coats, as if challenging one another. They started to dance the tango around the stage with Sokka leading.
Sokka (spoken):
Where'd you
learn to tango?
Mai (spoken)
With the French
ambassador's daughter in her dorm room at Miss Porter's. And
you?
Sokka (spoken):
With Nanette Himmelfarb, the
rabbi's daughter at the Scarsdale Jewish Community Center.
The two switched places and Mai began to lead. Sokka seemed to be struggling with tangoing backwards.
Sokka (spoken):
It's hard to do this
backwards.
Mai (spoken):
You should try it in heels!
Mai dropped Sokka from the dip she had him in. By the time Sokka got back up, Abbey had used her authoring powers to cause a sudden quick-change between the characters on stage. They were both in formal wear. Ty Lee and Jet ran then onto the stage and started to tango, also, but quite aggressively. Mai and Sokka were tangoing again, too, but they soon averted their attention to the other couple on stage.
Mai:
She cheated.
Sokka:
She
cheated.
Mai:
Ty Lee cheated.
Sokka:
Fucking
cheated.
Mai:
I'm defeated;
I should give up
right now.
Sokka:
Got to look on the bright
side
With all of your might!
Mai:
I'd fall for
her still anyhow.
Both:
When you're dancing her
dance,
you don't stand a chance.
Her grip of romance
makes
you fall.
Sokka:
So you think, might as
well,
Mai:
Dance a tango to hell.
Both:
At
least I'll have tangoed at all!
The Tango: Ty Lee!
Got to dance
'til your diva is through.
You pretend to believe her
'cause
in the end, you can't leave her.
But the end it will come,
still
you have to play dumb
'til you're glum and you bum
and turn
blue.
Sokka:
Why do we love when she's
mean?
Mai:
And she can be so obscene . . .
My Ty Lee . . .
Both:
The Tango: Ty Lee!
"Yay!" Abbey squealed, and ran onstage to hug her first singing victims.
"Why, Mai," Ty Lee teased, "I had no idea you felt that way about me!" Ty Lee burst into a fit of giggles. Mai was fuming and staring at Abbey with hate.
"Look, Mai," Abbey said, "I'm sorry. I don't believe you're a lesbian, but some other fanpeople do. So there; 'tis not my fault." Abbey crossed her arms and smiled. Mai was still angry and tried to throw a stiletto at her. Abbey barely ducked in time. "Alright, those need to go."
