A/N: I was asked for more GSR…so I'm delivering…I got so swept up with Nick (cause I 3 George Eads) and I'm in the middle of writing another book about Nick…so I switch back and forth and just keep on writing Nick scenes…hmm…sorry ya'll, but I'm tryin to figure out how that's a bad thing…tee hee (Nicky lovers know what I'm talkin bout!)
Alrighty…I noticed that in the first paragraph of the last chapter I wrote Nick and Anna…oops. It was supposed to be Nick and Kris. Anna is a chick from a different book…see, I told ya'll I switch back and forth…I have to stop that.
Also, while this is a GSR chapter…it's got lots of Lindsey in it too…sorry if I'm lettin anyone down, but that's an issue that I just need to address. Also…thoughts are no longer displayed like this… /-/ blah blah blah /-/ they are the typical way… like this
blah blah blah
So…hope I didn't confuse anyone…and that's it!
Onward…MARCH!
Chapter 6: It's Never Really What It Seems
Saturday December 9, 2004
Quality Inn Massena
7:24 a.m.
Sara sighed and slowly opened her eyes to the small amount of light shining through the small space between the
curtains of the window. She smiled and sighed once more, immediately feeling the strong arms that were wrapped around her tighten. She chuckled and rolled over to face his sleeping, scruffy face; bringing her hand to cup his cheek she lightly kissed his soft pink lips. She watched as his lips twitched, but he didn't stir from his sleep.
She played with the scruff on his face and pulled lightly at the short hairs on his chin, not enough to wake him, but enough to make him stir. When she finally realized he wasn't going to wake up, she sighed and slid out of bed. As soon as her feet hit the floor he reached out for her arm with a sneaky smile. She looked back at him in surprise. "I thought you were sleeping."
"I was, until someone moved around on the bed…and you were having fun so I kept pretending."
"Aww…I'm sorry." She apologized.
He smiled and opened his eyes. "Don't be, I missed you." Grissom replied sweetly and she chuckled and rolled back into his comforting embrace.
"Can I ask you a question?"
Grissom scoffed. "Is dissolved oxygen produced by aquatic plants and algae through photosynthesis?"
Sara paused but turned her neck so she could see him. She gave a small smile and raised her eyebrow. "A simple 'yes' would suffice."
"True, but this way we're exercising our brains and keeping ourselves sharp even though we're on vacation."
"Technically we're not on vacation. This is a seminar of entomological proportions." Sara challenged and Grissom chuckled.
"It's so obvious why I've fallen for you." He stated and kissed her cheek. She chuckled. "Alright, pose your inquiry."
"Why have you changed all of a sudden? Not that I mind." She said quickly, "Trust me, I don't. It's just…it's weird with you being so…sudden."
"Sudden?"
"For lack of a better word."
"Sara," She looked up and into his beautiful azure eyes. "For so many years I dragged you along, ignored you, I didn't want you too close but never too far away. I played with your head needless, to say…but that doesn't mean I didn't think about you, this…us. I thought about it constantly…I planned it…I hoped for it. I'm just making up for lost time…do you think this trip was by accident?" Grissom asked. "I purposely waited till the last minute to ask you so that you would have a less likely chance of saying no. Even if 'this'," He gestured between them and the bed. "Wouldn't have happened…we at least needed to talk and sort things out. Catherine cornered me in my office a few weeks ago and yelled at me. She said that I was putting you through Hell and I needed to, quote, 'get my shit together before some serious damage was done…to the both of us', unquote. She helped me with this little scheme."
Sara smirked. "I shoulda' known. Cat's a good actress."
Grissom chuckled. "And I should've known that she would've pulled some scheme over my eyes to hire someone who'd be under her authority."
Sara chuckled. "How do you think the new girl is taking it at the lab?"
Grissom thought for a moment as he wrapped his arms tighter around Sara. "I think she's doing okay…Rick says she's young though. Younger than Greg."
"Just a baby huh?" Sara said wrinkling her nose.
"Not a fan of kids, are we Sara Sidle?"
Sara shook her head. "Nope. The only one that ever liked me was Brenda Collins…the little girl from the quadruple homicide set up by her sister…I mean mother." Sara replied, her eyes darkening. Grissom looked at her and frowned.
"Sara…honey-"
She shook her head, cutting him off. "But that was the only kid who liked me."
"What about when you were little?"
Sara shook her head. "Nope…I was always in my backyard reading…"
Grissom stared at her for a moment and then kissed her forehead. "Well kids don't matter…I like you." He said sweetly. "I love you."
She smiled and closed her eyes as he brought her forehead to his lips again. She slid her long, thin arms around his and nestled her head into his chest. "I love you too."
Desert Palms
Recovery Ward
10:08 a.m.
Greg walked through the halls of the gloomy and despondent hospitals…he hated hospitals…always had. The smell of disinfectant, neon white lights, sterile environments…no skin to skin contact…only latex.
Ever since his father had died he vowed to never step foot in one again.
That was until he was in the lab explosion.
He hated the hospital…he hated the nurses…he hated the doctors and everyone and everything around him. It had all reminded him of his father's death. And how, as a nine year old little boy, Greg wanted nothing more than to see his father walk down the stairs of their home, sit at the table and read the paper, eat their breakfast as a family, and then go out and play ball.
Greg hated the fact that he couldn't go home…if there was no hope of him ever getting better why couldn't he at least be in a place where he was happy?
His mother understood…she wanted the same thing…to have her husband back. After his father had died he and his mother had been closer than ever, each holding onto his memory when no one else understood. Leaving her in California was the hardest thing Greg ever had to do…
It had hurt…it still hurt…
But he couldn't think about that now. He couldn't think about himself and his fucked up life.
He had to think about Lindsey…and how, as a young girl with a dead father, she must really hate hospitals too. Greg knew that feeling. He saw Warrick and Catherine sitting in the chairs outside Lindsey's door, looking like Hell. Greg walked up to them and smiled sympathetically. "Hey guys…how's she doing?"
Catherine sighed. "She's better…but she still won't talk to either of us…Greg, do you think maybe you could-"
Greg nodded and looked towards her door. "No problem Cat…" He turned his body to walk to the door, and he gently knocked on it. "Linds…can I come in?" He heard a muffled reply and hoped it was a 'yes'. He opened the door to the fragile, pale, blonde in the starchy hospital gown with sorrow. "Hey Kid." He greeted softly and held up a box wrapped in colorful paper. "I got you a gift."
She nodded towards the counter by her small window. "Thanks." Came her raspy reply and Greg smiled knowingly.
"I know hospitals suck, and you're just dyin to go outside so…" He took the lid off the box and pulled out a small, empty cage. Lindsey looked at it curiously. And Greg gave her a lopsided grin while he threw a small cape over his hand. "I have a surprise…Abra Cadabra, Ala Kazam!" He exclaimed and yanked the cape away to reveal a small blue bird. "This is the Arctic Bluebird, otherwise known as the Mountain Bluebird. This is the state bird of Las Vegas…where you happen to live,"
"Imagine that." She remarked raspy.
"And where you were born."
"And its where my dad died." She pointed out bitterly. Greg looked at her and sighed as he put the bird in the cage. "Is that allowed?"
"Probably not." He sat down in the chair next to her bed and shook his head. "Lindsey…you have a lot of people scared…"
"Hey, I made it out of this alive."
Greg scoffed. "Barely. Lindsey, is that what you think we were all concerned about? Yeah, sure, we were really concerned about that, but I knew that you'd make it out. What I'm afraid of; is that you are going to go out there and trying this again. Why'd you do it in the first place Lindsey?"
She paused as she struggled with the tears in her eyes. She wouldn't cry. She wouldn't cry in front of Greg. She had secretly had a crush on him since she had first met him at the lab. He was young and quirky and care free. Plus he was hot and didn't treat her like some stupid teenager. She sighed and looked down at her hands. "I wanted to escape."
"From what?" Greg asked truly interested, he couldn't keep the concern and heart break out of his voice, an area he and Grissom differed.
"Everything." She looked up and sniffled. "I can't stand it here."
Greg bit his tongue to keep from asking the question on everyone's minds,
Was it a suicide attempt?
Greg looked down at his hands and then to the bird on the window sill. He knew it wouldn't last long there. It would either be booted out by the nurses…or the doctor. But he didn't really expect it to last long there…much like Lindsey.
"Ask it." She ordered Greg firmly, and looked over at her taken aback by her blunt nature. "Ask the question that's written all over your face." Greg stared at the much younger girl in front of him.
"Lindsey…was it a suicide attempt?"
She smiled and looked away. "No…and surprisingly I'm relieved to tell someone that."
"Didn't Catherine ask you that?"
"Yeah…but it felt like I was just saying it for her."
"What do you mean?" Greg asked truly confused.
"I didn't mean it for suicide when I was drinking and taking the drugs…but after a while…I was trying to escape, but permanently. I didn't want to die, but I didn't want to come back either. Then it wore off and I snapped back to reality…but I guess that was just a side effect. When Mom put me to bed I laid there and it all slowly started coming back. I…I couldn't breath. So I got up to open the window and…instead I opened the door and…I walked out. I heard voices, but they sounded like ten times louder…it was like they were right next to my ear…but I couldn't stop following them." Lindsey explained.
Greg sat there, frozen, and listened to the girl's story, unable to move to console her or supply comforting words…how was it a young girl, Lindsey's age, felt so much pain and knew so much emotional heart ache?
"I um…I don't remember much after that…but when I passed out I fell into another 'hole'. And all I could keep thinking was…Thank God…it's finally over."
Greg's jaw dropped slightly and he stared at her in shock. "Is this your first time trying OTC drugs…or any kind for that matter?"
Lindsey sniffled and blinked back the tears still threatening to pour from her soul and expose her for what she truly was…scared. She shook her head 'no' and continued looking at the door, and not at Greg. Greg sighed deeply and sat back in his chair, soaking it all in. "I've been trying a lot of different drugs lately…"
"Like what?"
"I shot heroine a month ago…tried crack cocaine…"
Greg felt this new information overwhelm him…she was barely 14…
"How often?"
"Only once…I…I didn't have a good tolerance for the stuff."
Greg silently thanked God.
"So I moved on to Meth."
Greg took back his thanks and cursed God as he closed his eyes. "Lindsey…you're only 13."
"I know."
"What else have you tried? Not…not just drugs." Greg said gulping back the vomit in his throat.
"I'm haven't had sex yet." Lindsey replied dryly and Greg winced at the last comment. Yet…she was planning it? Greg didn't go through this when his father died. Well sure he went through this, but he didn't handle it like this. He clung to science and his mother. Lindsey…was clinging to a vacillating life that was going to drop her on her ass and back into the 'hole' she had been so thankful for.
Deep down Greg knew it was a cry for help and an actual suicide attempt. Lindsey wasn't willing to fully admit that, and until she did and could explain it to him…though it may not have been right…Greg was going to keep this from Catherine and Warrick.
They were reeling too hard. They couldn't deal with the fact that Lindsey was trying to kill herself. Greg knew how dangerous this situation was, especially with him tampering with it. But if he knew Catherine, and he did, she would be horrified and try to push Lindsey.
Lindsey wouldn't push back…she's let Catherine push her right over the edge.
LVPD CSI Crime Lab
Break Room
6:23 p.m.
"You're pushin me over the edge!"
"I know."
"Stop!"
"Why?"
"Cause I'm on your team!"
"Shit!"
"Looser." The X Box commented and the word 'looser' appeared on the television screen in red, overlapping the characters on the video game crying in defeat. Nick threw down his remote controller in frustration and Archie chuckled.
"Oops…sorry man."
"Haven't you ever played this before?"
"No." Archie answered and turned around and stood up from the hard chairs they had been hunched over in. He stretched and looked down at the couch where Kris had fallen asleep. He furred his brows and looked up at Nick's back at the counter, pouring coffee. "Was she here the whole time?" Archie asked and Nick shrugged.
"Don't know."
Archie looked back at her and gently shook her shoulder. "Kris…Kris wake up…Kris." He said more forcefully and she bolted upright, almost hitting Archie.
"What?" She asked sharply and alert.
"It's almost next shift…you slept through Days and almost all of Swing."
"Oh." She said and smiled at Archie apologetically. "Sorry." She stretched and stood up, almost matching his height, and walked out of the break room and towards the locker room.
"So where's Sanders, Rick, and Cat?"
"All at the hospital with Linds I think…I went over there after shift but she was asleep, so I sat with Rick and Cat for a while…they ain't doin so well." Nick drawled, knowing that would be his next question.
"Is Greg coming in today?"
"He better be. He's the only DNA tech we've got. Mandy from Swing can't stay to help if he doesn't cause she's pulled a triple…girl needs sleep."
"How's your and Kris' case up in Henderson?"
Nick shrugged. "Piece of cake. Should have it wrapped up by mid shift tonight." Nick stated and sipped his coffee.
Greg walked into the break room looking less cheerful than usual and didn't even bother to greet the two men. Archie and Nick watched him as he sat down on the couch, swung his legs over the arm rest and threw his arm over his head.
"Uh Greggo…why don't you go home and catch some Z's man? It'll be easier."
"Because by the time I drive home I'll only have a few hours to sleep, then I have to use some of those hours to get ready for shift, so I can drive all the way back here to be here on time. So I'm gonna cut myself a break and just chill here for a few hours." Greg explained tiredly and Nick nodded.
"You went to the hospital." Nick stated more than asked. He received no response from Greg, and knew that meant that the time there had been unpleasant and stressful…as if it could be anything else. Nick nodded solemnly and he and Archie walked out of the room wordlessly.
Greg laid there for a few minutes, knowing very well that he wouldn't be sleeping, and just thought about all that Lindsey had said…how could a child so young experience so much? How could Catherine have missed it? He knew the answer to that, Catherine worked nights and slept days. Lindsey partied nights, then skipped school and got trashed days.
He sighed heavily and threw his legs over the couch angrily. He hated that this had happened to Lindsey. She was a good kid. A lot of people didn't see it. Hell, he didn't even think Lindsey saw it. But she was a good kid. Beneath the rough exterior she had a good heart and wanted to be happy…she just didn't know how.
Greg walked into the locker room and heard the shower running in the back of the huge, tile, room. He sighed and sat down on the bench, not really caring who walked out and stared at his feet. He stuck his hands under his thighs and kept his knees and legs together, staying hunched over and looking down. He sat like that when he felt vulnerable and defenseless. Much like he had in the foster homes after he had been taken from his mother's custody.
Greg had gotten into a bit of trouble and his mother couldn't support them both, the state had taken him away from her and Greg hated it…he knew he was the last thing she had. He knew that, without him, she wouldn't survive…and he wouldn't without her. On his sixteenth birthday he got out of the foster care and went to see his mother…she was doing okay, but seeing Greg again helped bring her back up. They had clung to each other once again, Greg supported them while she was fighting her drinking problems, she got a job and soon, they were okay.
They weren't perfect, they weren't great, they weren't even good…but they were okay. They had the things that they needed and more…but it's hard to be happy when the person you love is dead.
Greg sighed and brought his hand from under his thigh and rubbed his tired face, thinking a shower would be a good idea. He sighed, grabbed his spare towel from his locker, which all CSIs brought from their homes, and started back towards the stalls.
He took the only other spare stall, next to the one currently in use, the one on the other side if the occupied one was out of order. He sighed and peeled off his clothes, kicking them to the wall next to his stall and stepped into the shower. He turned slightly to close the curtain and start his shower. He felt the hot water pelt his skin and jolt him awake, when suddenly he heard it. The soft singing of a female voice. It sounded sweet and soulful, yet strong and confidant. The owner could have very much passed for Christina Aguilera. He listened as the familiar lyrics filled the community locker rooms.
"Amazing grace, how sweet the sound. That saved a wretch like me. I once was lost but now I'm found. Was blind but now I see. 'Twas grace that taught my heart to fear, and grace that fear relieved. How precious did that grace appear, the hour I first believed. Through many dangers toils and snares, I have already come. 'Twas grace that brought me safely thus far, and grace will lead me home. And when this heart and flesh shall fail, and mortal life shall cease. I shall possess within the vail a life of joy and peace." The voice finished and the water in the next stall stopped.
He heard shuffling and the sound of the other occupant clearing their throat as they drew back the curtain and exited the stall. Greg desperately wanted to know who it was, but knew that peeking was not an option. He saw the silhouette of a woman on the other side of the curtain stop, turn to face whichever way she already wasn't, and clear her throat again.
Greg realized that the person was embarrassed and he smirked. "Nice voice." He commented and the figure disappeared towards the bathroom stalls to change. He chuckled and continued with his shower and trying to wake himself up.
Quality Inn Massena
Grissom/Sidle Room
7:24 p.m.
Grissom bounded towards Sara who was sliding on her jeans and trying to get ready for dinner. "Sara! Guess what! The seminar is open tomorrow! I get to talk about bugs!" he cheered excitedly before she could answer. She forced a pleasant smile that fooled him into thinking she was excited about dealing with 'creepy crawlies' all day.
"Good." Was all she could manage and Grissom's grin widened.
"I'm third on the list tomorrow and we can leave for the day as soon as I'm done. So…we should be done around 6:30 p.m. But we'll have breaks in between to eat and prep." Grissom explained and Sara nodded slowly.
"So what exactly do I have to do?"
"Basically help explain how bugs have helped with some of the cases you've worked. People love hearing about how much entomologists appreciate insects in forensics, but they love it even more when someone who isn't a fan does also."
"Why?"
"Easy my dear, new blood for the bugs."
"So is this a blood or bugs meeting?"
Crime Lab
DNA Lab
8:16 p.m.
"Both."
"How can it be both?" Kris asked perplexed and Greg handed her the paper. She read it, as Nick skimmed it looking over her shoulder. When she was finished she handed it to him so he could read it more carefully. Nick sighed.
"Easy, two different blood types, two different donors." Greg answered, not his usual up-beat self.
"Oh…that was kind of obvious." Nick stated and Kris nodded.
"Yeah."
"Hey, I'm gonna go call Brass and get him to haul in this second donor. Meet up in the interview room in twenty?" Nick said shoving Kris' arm lightly and she nodded. She looked over at Greg, who was paying her no attention, and she walked over to his desk and sat in the chair across from him.
"Hey Greg…what's up?" She asked concerned. Greg looked up and into her hazel eyes and sighed.
"Just…Lindsey stuff…"
"She finally talked huh?"
Greg nodded solemnly and pursed his lips. "Yeah." He said softly and Kris nodded.
"You knew she had to talk, and you're glad that she did, you just wish that you didn't know what's really going on."
"Yeah…ignorance is bliss."
"At least in this case…" She studied Greg's face and pulled the last piece of information she needed to complete the puzzle. "You're wondering why she talked to you and not anyone else."
Greg nodded slowly and sighed heavily. "I don't know why she didn't talk to Catherine."
"She needed someone who wouldn't push, and let their emotional feelings get too involved and overwhelm her…that's the subconscious reason anyway."
"How do you know so much about this?" Greg asked and Kris sighed.
"My friend went into rehab for this very reason."
"Was it hard to deal with?"
"The hardest. At times she said she just wanted to give up…she said it wasn't worth it. She just wanted all the pain gone."
"If you don't mind me asking…why'd she do it?"
Kris sighed and scooted closer, so she could lean on the desk, "She said she wanted an escape route. She didn't want to have to deal with the shit she dealt with every day anymore. She said she was tired of her fucked up life and couldn't stand who she was."
"Wow." Was all Greg could manage as he sat back. "Did you stick with her through it all."
"Every day. I would visit her and just…be there."
"Did you help her through it? Is she okay now?"
"Yes. She's clean now."
"Does she ever really think about going back to it?"
"I don't know…I haven't had much time to talk to her since it happened…she got clean and…found help and I left."
"Why?" Greg asked confused.
"Because it wouldn't have been good for anyone if I had stayed there. Too much." She said simply and Greg rubbed his forehead again.
"How long did it take?"
"The OD recovery…a few days. The rehab…a few months. The aftermath and heart ache…years. Pain and scars it caused…eternity." Kris answered and Greg looked at her worried. "I don't mean to scare you or be so blunt Greg, but that's the truth…sometimes brutal honesty is just what you need."
"Do you um…do you think you might be able to talk to Lindsey? I mean, as someone who's been through it before. I think…I think she needs some empathy, but not pity or sympathy."
Kris thought a moment. "She doesn't really know me…is she gonna be okay talking to a complete stranger?"
"You'll come highly recommended from everyone around her. Plus…sometimes its easier to talk to someone who can't judge so easily, for lack of justification, and knowing that they don't hold it against you." Greg supplied and Kris thought for a few moments, then nodded.
"Alright…but don't let Cat go breathing down my neck. I can't be there for Lindsey if I'm worried about Catherine."
Greg nodded, "Consider it taken care of."
"When do I go see her?"
"ASAP…she's pushin people away the longer she's there…I think she has a fear of hospitals."
Kris nodded
I know that feeling.
She walked out of the lab and down the halls, rounding the corner to the interview room. Nick was already setting up for the second donor. He looked up from his case files and saw her standing in the doorway looking uncertain.
Part of her wanted to go in there and sit down so that she could prepare for the suspect, but the other part of her wanted to bolt in the other direction and let Nick handle this…she didn't really want to be in his presence when she was in such a shitty mood already.
She sighed and walked into the room and sat next to Nick in the chair provided for her. They sat in impartial silence as they went over their notes, exchanged papers, and asked nonaligned questions pertaining to the case. Nick's phone began to ring and Kris looked over at it on the table, Nick reached for it and Brass' voice greeted him.
"Hey Brass. Yeah, were in here goin over notes, just getting re-" Nick paused and frowned, then looked at Kris and she frowned and mouthed. 'What's wrong?'
He held up his finger for a second and then hung up with Brass. "Donor number two is incommunicado." Nick explained. He sighed and put his phone away. "Brass and his boys are goin out to find him…they're gonna be a while so he said just finish up with as much as we can and get ready for when we bring him in." Nick drawled.
Kris huffed and threw down her pen. "I've been done for the past ten minutes, I just didn't want to have to go into the break room and get more coffee because if I ingest anymore coffee I'm going to have an ulcer." Kris replied and Nick shook his head.
"Well…then go take a nap in the break room."
"On it." Kris mumbled and headed off in that direction. Nick sighed and gathered up all the papers and headed after her, into the break room. He saw Kris and Greg talking in the room when he walked in. They seemed to be deep in important conversation, and Greg stiffened when he saw Nick. Kris turned around and mimicked Greg's position.
Nick looked at them with a raised eyebrow. "What's up guys?" Nick asked and Greg shook his head.
"Nothing."
Nick eyed them for a moment, then held up the case file for Kris to see. "I finished the rest. We're ready to go." Nick remarked and Kris nodded.
"Okay."
Nick watched them and then walked out the door. He was halfway down the hall when he remembered he had left the number he had to check on in the case file. He went to turn around to get it and rounded the corner when he saw Kris and Greg in the break room. Kris nodded to whatever Greg was saying and Greg leaned in and kissed her on the cheek. He smiled thankfully and left her in the break room. Nick pulled back so that Greg could pass by and not see him.
Nick looked over and saw Kris leaned against the counter and sigh, then reluctantly reach for the coffee and pour herself another glass. Nick took a deep breath and walked back into the room. He wasn't necessarily angry, he was more annoyed that Greg would get involved in a romantic relationship within the lab. Those always ended up in a bust…wait…
He walked into the room and Kris looked up from her coffee and to Nick's face. He stared at her for a moment, and then reached into the case file and removed the tiny slip of paper. "Forgot the number." Nick stated and waved the paper.
Kris raised an eyebrow and shrugged. "Okay?" She replied shaking her head and turning to go sit at the table and go through the file he had left. She looked up and saw him still standing there. "What?" She asked and Nick sighed.
"Nothin." He shrugged and walked out, though there was clearly something on his mind. Kris furred her manicured brows and scrunched her nose in perplexity. She looked at the door Nick had exited from and thought for a second, before going back to her work.
Catherine's House
8:23 p.m.
"Catherine, you can't go back to work." Warrick protested and Catherine sighed.
"Warrick, you said yourself that I can't be obsessing over Lindsey, it's not healthy for either of us…so I need to go to work to distract myself."
"There are hardly any cases. I think Nick and Kris are working on one that they're about to wrap up…what are you going to do?"
"I don't know…maybe I'll rearrange Grissom's office."
"And then he'll come back and shoot you."
Catherine snorted. "All I know is that I have to get out of here…this place…this depressing environment."
Warrick sighed and stood up. "Then I'm going with you…you're going to need a shoulder to lean on when you get tired…I mean that literally and metaphorically by the way." Warrick added and Catherine gave a soft smile.
"Thank you."
"Well…I need to go get ready for work…give me twenty minutes."
"Twenty minutes!"
"Yeah, believe it or not I put effort into my wardrobe."
"Please, anything that can have the top three buttons undone and pants that show off your sculpted ass will work…no one much cares beyond that."
Warrick chuckled and Catherine smiled and walked away.
"Twenty minutes!" She called over her shoulder.
Sunday December 10, 2004
Quality Inn Massena
6:10 a.m.
"Twenty more minutes Sara and then we'll be late." Grissom warned and Sara scurried out of the bathroom, finishing up with her hair and sliding on her shoes.
"Okay, okay. Relax Gil. I'm done." She walked up to him with a lazy smile and pecked his lips. "Let's go." She tugged lightly on his hand but he stopped, holding her in place.
"Sara…"
"Yeah?"
"You have to be professional when we go there."
"I know."
"No calling me Gil. Not even Griss. It's Grissom."
"I know." She repeated.
"We can't be lovers there. We have to be supervisor and subordinate."
Sara stiffened, but nodded and bit her tongue. She didn't like the fact of him acting superior and dominate…but she knew she had no other choice. "I got it."
"Any slip ups… and rumors could spill out that I brought you here for pleasure rather than business."
"But you did."
Grissom sighed and closed his eyes, acting as though he was talking to a stubborn child. Sara raised her brow and a look of seriousness crossed her face. "But I can't have everyone knowing that. That isn't the whole reason. I wasn't lying when I said you knew the most about bugs…it just turned out to be luck that we would become involved romantically."
Luck that we get to fuck…nice Griss. Or should I say Dr. Grissom.
"I know Grissom. I've done this before, believe it or not."
"I know you have Sara, but things were different then. We were together."
"You think I can't handle myself, and control my urges around you? I've been doing that for five years, the skill is practically mastered." Sara pointed out bitterly, beginning to become annoyed that he thought she was that unethical.
"Yes, but back then we weren't having sex."
Sara huffed and stared him square in the eye. "Are you going to be like this when we have to return to work?"
"We'll cross that bridge when we come to it Sara." Grissom replied in a un-Grissom-ly manner, only saying that to cop out of the situation. He went to leave and pulled on her arm when she yanked him back in place.
"Or we can do it now. Since you like to be so prepared." Sara countered.
Grissom eyed her skeptically. "What's that supposed to mean?"
"It's not supposed to mean anything Grissom." She stressed his name and he scowled. "It was just an observation and suggestion."
"Are you trying to pick a fight?"
"And what's that supposed to mean?"
"Exactly what it sounds like. This is what I'm talking about Sara, we can't do this there."
"Fine. You know, we won't d this there. I'll behave. You don't have to worry, unless of course you don't trust me enough to bring me out in public."
"You know that isn't true Sara, I took you to dinner."
"You're right Grissom! You did, didn't you? You took me two floors down from our room into a place full of people whom we didn't know, and didn't even take my hand! Good for you."
She let go of his hand and began to walk from the room. "Sara, don't mess this up for me." Grissom blurted and Sara whipped around to glare at him.
"Don't worry Dr. Grissom. I won't mess up your big day. I'll simply stand there and say the lines we rehearsed. I'll be good and orderly. In fact, in order to reduce the stress of me blowing our cover, how about we don't speak any un-rehearsed lines to each other." Sara snipped and walked out of the room.
Grissom watched her go and sighed.
Way to go Gil…not even two days with her and you already fucked it up…just like everything and everyone else.
He sighed again and followed her out the door.
Desert Palms
Recovery Ward
6:35 a.m.
Kris stood outside Lindsey's door for nearly ten minutes, contemplating what she had gotten herself into…
God Kris! What in the Hell were you thinking? You can't do this! You can't just dispel sensitive pieces of your past to a total stranger with a liable association to your co-workers and current boss. What were you thinking? Oh, I know, you weren't…ugh…stop Kris…stop. You can't think of you right now…you need to think of her. The young girl just beyond this door. All your intentions have to be for her. She's your focus right now…not your own well-being.
"Excuse me, Miss?" The nurse approached Kris and tapped her shoulder. "Do you need help?"
Kris looked into her dark brown eyes and nodded her head. "Yeah, I could use some help." Kris said and walked into the room, closing the door behind her. She bit her lip as Lindsey looked over at her skeptically.
"Who are you?"
Kris gave a small, supportive smile. "Kris Anderson. I'm the new CSI at the lab. Your mom hired me."
Lindsey stared for a moment, "Are you old enough to be a CSI?"
Kris chuckled and smirked. "Yes. Why, how old do I look?"
"23 tops."
"Pretty close." Kris replied sitting down in the chair, occupied by Greg the previous day. "I um…I was wondering how you were doing."
"Why? You don't know me."
"True…but you have everyone at the lab pretty worried. I wanted to see the infamous Lindsey Willows."
"Well, you've seen her." She stated dryly.
Kris raised her brow and leaned back in the chair. "You're pretty sarcastic for a 13 year old."
"I'm mature for my age."
Piece one of the puzzle…
"Why?" Kris asked and Lindsey looked at her oddly.
"What?"
"Why are you mature for your age?"
Lindsey shook her head. "You don't care. You're here as a favor to my mom."
"Not true, I do care. I wouldn't have asked if I didn't. I don't like wasting my time, so why would I baby you if I didn't really want to know…plus your mom has no idea I'm here."
Lindsey analyzed her for a moment, "I don't know why." She lied and Kris sat forward, resting her elbows on her knees and letting her shoulder length red hair spill over her shoulders and frame her face.
"You know, it's been my experience as a CSI, that when a child is mature for their age it's because they didn't have much of a childhood to base themselves upon. Did you know that the first five years are the most critical in a child's life?" Lindsey shook her head. "They are…that's why most children in foster care over the age of five don't find homes easily. They've already had a basis of a child hood, most people aren't willing to take the challenge and help them turn out for the better."
"I was never in foster care."
"So what's your story?"
"Story?"
"Yeah…everyone has a story."
Lindsey looked at the door and ignored Kris. "Why do you care about someone you don't even know?"
"Because a lot of my friends care about you…and have you seen your mom lately? She's not doin too well Linds…"
"I haven't noticed." Lindsey snipped.
"Whose fault is that?" Kris countered, Lindsey was beginning to test her patience, and she hadn't eaten, hadn't slept decently, and hadn't been to her hotel room in almost 48 hours…she wasn't up for struggling with a rebellious teenager.
"I really don't give a flying fuck." Lindsey snapped and Kris scoffed and shook her head.
"Yours kid." she answered harshly and shook her head. She pushed herself up out of the chair and walked to the door, shaking her head. She threw it open. "Have a nice day." She snipped over her shoulder and stormed down the hall. "Man that kids a piece of work!"
Hmm…remind you of anyone?
Kris stopped in her tracks. She moaned and turned around and marched back to Lindsey's room.
She opened the door and shut it loudly behind her, grabbing Lindsey's attention. "You know what kid; you're a real piece of work. Has anyone ever told you that? You know what, don't answer that. If they haven't before than I am now. I was in here trying to help you and everyone you're hurting to get through this…and I'm not giving up." Lindsey opened her mouth to protest but Kris pushed on. "I'm not giving you the satisfaction of being alone…because I know that's what you're really looking for. You don't want anyone close to you because then you feel pitied, and crowded, and vulnerable. I'm not giving up on you because I know that deep down inside of you is a good kid who's scared and worried. I want you to see that you're not alone and that it's okay to let people near."
Lindsey looked at Kris in shock. "Why do you care so much? I'm not your responsibility."
Kris sighed. "Because you remind me of someone I used to know."
"Who?"
Kris sat down in the chair against. "My friend. She was in a similar situation as you…all she needed was a little help."
"So you think all I need is a little help?"
"No, I think you need a lot of help, tough love, and brutal honesty."
"I don't think I can talk about it."
"Why not?"
"Because…I don't know you."
"So you think I'll judge. Lindsey, I'm a firm believer of not judging a person you've just met, So, I'd be a hypocrite if I judged you at all. Lord knows I hate a hypocrite. Don't you think it'll be easier spilling everything out to a person who has no right to judge you, and knowing that they won't?"
Lindsey sighed, "I don't know where to start…"
"The beginning works. But if you want, you can start with why you're in here in the first place…"
"I OD'd."
"I got that, why'd you OD?"
"I wanted to get away…I wanted to leave this shitty life."
"You did it as a suicide attempt?"
"Not really."
"Subconsciously." Kris stated.
"How'd you know?"
"I told you, I had a friend in a situation similar to this. It was basically the same deal."
"What happened to her?" Lindsey asked, finally turning to face Kris.
Kris sighed and looked at her hands. "She um…she was involved with drugs for a while…she OD'd a few times…never enough to slip away, just enough to stall and vacation from reality."
"Why?"
"She was sick of her home life, or lack there of."
"Kinda like me." Lindsey said softly.
"What happened to your home life?"
"I didn't have one. Mom was either dancing, or working, or banging guys…we didn't see much of each other."
"Who took care of you?"
"My Dad, before they got divorced, then he only saw me sometimes, then my grandma did…"
"Don't you see your dad anymore?"
Lindsey shook her head gravely. "No…he, died."
Kris sighed and leaned forward.
Another piece…
"How long ago?"
"Almost two years." Lindsey answered grimly. Kris watched her intently and tried to keep her facial reactions neutral, the most frequent mistake of someone listing to a person's private personal history. Kris knew that the wrong kind of facial expression can give someone the wrong, or right, notion, and cause them to shut down and become utterly isolated. Especially someone in Lindsey's current state.
Kris nodded, urging her on.
"He uh…he was murdered…sort of…"
"What happened?" Kris inquired in a impartial voice.
"Well…" She began nervously.
"Start from wherever…what happened the morning before he was taken…did the two of you hang out?"
Lindsey paused and looked the woman barely twice her age in her hazel eyes and felt a small amount of solace come over her…though she displayed no emotion, Lindsey was fine with that. Right now, pity and sympathy is what she didn't need…she needed someone who would equitably listen.
If anyone else had asked this much of or from her Lindsey would have felt like she was being 'shrink wrapped' as her mother often referred therapy as. But this lady…Kris…she seemed like she knew what she was doing. If she hadn't specified earlier that she was a crime scene analyst Lindsey would have guessed that she was a psychiatrist.
Maybe she majored in human psychology.
Lindsey wondered and continued with her story.
"We uh…we were hanging out that morning…just talking. Then he said that he had to go visit someone…" Lindsey waited for Kris to ask who…she didn't. So Lindsey offered it. "His girlfriend…she was an aspiring singer."
Lindsey felt an 'And how did that make you feel?' moment coming on…but Kris didn't utter a word. She merely nodded softly and brought her finger to her pursed lips in thought. Lindsey looked at the wall behind the woman and continued softly. "He was producing her…said she was going to be famous someday…"
"He spent a lot of time with her." Kris offered and Lindsey nodded.
"I was jealous…she didn't seem to appreciate him, nevertheless the time he spent on her. I love me Dad so much…he always seemed to listen when Mom couldn't."
Kris secretly wondered if she wouldn't more than couldn't listen. She mentally shook the thought away and felt bad, she knew that Catherine was a good person and mother, she loved Lindsey, and she was trying her hardest to raise her right, being a now single parent and all…
Kris was just glad that Catherine now had Warrick to rely on…
Hilton
Ballroom B- Entomology Convention
Hallway
Massena, New York
10:23 a.m.
"Warrick and Catherine are together!" Sara shouted in amazement.
"Sara! Please…I don't want Grissom knowing. I wasn't even supposed to tell you. Ugh! I can't believe I did that. I thought everyone already knew." Kris pleaded innocently. She had called Sara and Grissom to see how they were doing after Lindsey had fallen asleep, tired after their long and drawn out talk. Kris had walked into the waiting room and caught the tail end of Nick and Warrick's conversation about him and Catherine.
"Freudian Slip?"
"You've been spending too much time with Grissom and his books."
"How do you know about Grissom's book collection?"
"I've been in his office, quick question off the subject, what's with the shrunken heads and fetal pig?"
"Grissom's weird."
"Yeah, I got that."
"But oh my God! Warrick and Catherine? Finally…who else knows?"
"Well, just Nick and I for now…he let it slip in front of me when he and Warrick were joking around, but it was so obvious to me when I saw their interactions before that, so I already knew. I just thought everyone else knew…they didn't seem to be hiding it, well, Nick and Warrick weren't when they were talking about it."
"Probably because they weren't worrying about being caught."
"So, you just…guessed that they were together before you knew for sure?"
"Yeah…it was kind of obvious."
Sara gulped and made a mental note to watch her and Grissom's antics around Kris…
"Wow…I'm just relieved that they finally did something about the sexual tension that was smothering us all." Sara said, knowing very well that they weren't the only couple smothering the crime lab in unsettled sexual urges. If she had said that around anyone else she knew that several looks of disbeliefs and scoffs would have been thrown her way. Her thoughts involuntarily wandered back to her and Grissom's silly quarrel in the hotel room earlier that morning.
Thinking back on it now it seemed stupid and unnecessary. Why had she acted so foolish?
God…I was like a little kid. I was so childish…
Then she realized Kris had said something to her. "Huh? Sorry Kris, I missed what you said."
Kris chuckled. "I said 'they seem to be taking care of any extra sexual tension that's left lingering around the lab.' Catherine came back in for shift today, much to Warrick's disapproval, but she worked a case and we finally filled her in on the whole Paul Millander thing…she's making head way with it."
Sara sighed. "I really wish I could be there right now."
Kris chuckled and leaned back against the sofa in the break room. "What? Bug convention no fun?" She teased and Sara chuckled back. She really wanted someone to talk to about her and Grissom's current situation…but knew that wasn't a good idea.
"Eh, you know…same 'ole same 'ole. Just the typical Calliphoridae, Phoridae, Sphaeroceridae, Nicrophorus, Creophilus, and Saprinus." Sara replied.
"Calliphoridae, family of the Blowfly, Phoridae family of the Coffin Fly, Sphaeroceridae family to the Lesser Corpse Fly. All flies, the first to arrive on the scene. Nicrophorus beetles usually carry the mite Poecilochirus on their backs, which feed on fly eggs, and if they get to the corpse before the fly eggs can hatch into maggots the maggot maturity is belated. The Creophilus species are frequent predators of carrion and are a very visible component of the fauna of corpses. The Saprinus lay their eggs on the corpse during the later stages of corrosion." Kris added and Sara stood in the hallway shocked.
"Wow…I thought you majored in anthropology?"
"I do, my mom was a bug freak though."
Sara caught the use of the past tense reference. "Was?"
"Yeah." Kris answered in a monotone voice and continued, "Well, I'll let you get back to your 'bug time'."
"Alright, talk to you later Kris."
"Bye Sara."
With that they hung up the phone and Sara sighed and leaned against the wall. A few moments later the doors opened and people poured from within, leaving for the intermission between speakers and Sara smiled. "Recess."
A/N: Okay…so how was that?
Sorry about the long update, life got in the way. R&R and let me know how it was…I'm just dyin to know:)
I know there wasn't much Geeklove…and I made them fight…but its an early relationship, they were due for a disagreement. It felt too fluffy.
And, yes, I know the odds of a classy hotel like the 'Hilton' being in a tiny town like Massena…but hey, it's called fan FICTION. Maybe you could let it pass? Please:)