Drunk Logan
Chapter 15

A/N: Okay, so I know that Veronica's favorites are different than what I give her, but I used creative leeway to insert my favorites. I look at it as a way of improving on what Rob has given us. Also, I kind of gave a shout out to ethereal65's WTUD from lj. It is a broad reference, but the intention was there.

I've gotten such positive feedback and it feeds the beast. Thank you so much!

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It was around three o'clock when they got back to Logan's house. They were deciding what they should do for the afternoon before getting to bed early. They had decided that the Troy "issue" would wait until Keith got home in the morning. Veronica was still reluctant to go to Lamb, and Logan was hoping Keith could talk her into it. Until then, they would just stay at Logan's. Veronica wouldn't be going anywhere near the school until Troy was handled; and Logan wouldn't be going anywhere that Veronica wasn't.

Even though they didn't have to worry about school, Veronica had been through more in 36 hours than most people had to deal with in a decade. She was exhausted and needed to sleep. And, as Logan pointed out, she needed food, too. She hadn't eaten much in the last couple of days and she needed her strength. Logan knew that no matter what they decided to do about Troy; Veronica had a very long and rough day ahead of her.

They put on the movie 'Head Over Heels,' one of the funniest movies ever made and then ordered Thai food, which they would follow up with Tillamook Mudslide ice cream. They figured that by the time the food got there and they had eaten, the movie would be over and they could go to bed. Knowing how sore Veronica was, Logan arranged to have a tv/dvd player set up by the hot tub.

When Veronica saw what he had done, she couldn't believe it. Once again, Logan had done exactly what she needed, when she needed it. She didn't know how he was able to do that, but would have ask him about it later.

Logan had to help her out of her jeans because she could barely move, but he was very discreet about it. This time was all about taking care of her. He knew that a relationship with him was the furthest thing from her mind. Even if it was on her radar, she was much too battered for him to think of undressing her as a sexual act. Any hormonal reaction he had to her body was immediately overrun by the rage he felt upon viewing more of her bruises.

The hot tub was great for her body. It didn't heal all of her wounds, but it gave her a reprieve from some of the pain for a little while. She knew that she would be even more sore in the morning and she wasn't looking forward to it.

After the movie, they headed up to Logan's room. Her sleeping anywhere else wasn't even a question. When helping her get ready for bed, he was amused by the fact that he might actually be asleep by 6 or 7 o'clock for the first time in his life and he couldn't wait. Logan watched as Veronica moved around tenderly.

"Veronica, we have some pain killers, if you want to take anything. They'll probably make you drowsy, but they'll also alleviate some of the pain. I mean, I'd understand if you don't want to after everything, but I just..."

"No, that sounds like a good idea." She looked into his eyes and covered his hand with hers. "I'm safe with you, Logan."

She chuckled a little, "Bring me my meds, boy. Chop, chop." She clapped her hands together to emphasize her point.

He couldn't help the laughter that spilled out of him. He never thought he'd enjoy being called "boy" so much in his life. Of course, it may have had something to do with the enormous amount of trust and faith she had in him. He didn't know if his head could swell any more and he couldn't believe the pure joy he had from making her happy. In the midst of this Hell that she was enduring, she felt protected and cared for by him and he wouldn't have it any other way. He was able to help her relax and have a little bit of fun. He felt needed by her and he had never felt needed by anyone. He may have loved Lilly, but she had always made it clear to him that she didn't need him or anyone, with the exception of Veronica. Those girls had an amazing friendship; he wondered now if it was because they were actually sisters.

After he'd given her the medicine, they crawled into bed. She laid on her stomach and faced Logan.

"So, are you going to entertain me until these magical pills of yours kick in and carry me off to dreamland?" She smiled as she asked him.

"Well, that's a pretty tall order Miss Mars, but I'll give it the old college try."

"The old college try? Logan, do you even know what that means? It means you'd actually have to put forth effort. Now, you know that I didn't mean for you to hurt yourself." She grinned evilly at him.

"Oh, I see how it's gonna be. You're going to use this opportunity," he waves his hands toward her battered body, "to abuse me, huh? And, at a time when I can't even retaliate. Just wait, those bruises won't be around forever. My memory, on the other hand, will be." He smirked back at her. "Have you forgotten about your most recent session of 'The Terrible Tickle Torture'?"

"What?" He said when he saw the quizzical look cross her face.

"Well, it's just that, I've been wondering about something."

"Yeah, that's surprising coming from the girl whose mind is always on overdrive. Bring it on, I am the man with the answers." He said as he put his hands behind his head, puffed out his chest and looked up at the ceiling.

"It's about something you said yesterday. I didn't catch it at first, but it just hit me today." At his raised eyebrow, she added, "Okay, bad choice of words. How about, realization dawned on me?"

"Proceed." His facial expression returned to the smugness of before.

"It's... just...that," she started hesitantly and he looked at her wondering what it was that was so difficult for her to ask, "yousaidIwasn'trapedandhowdidyouknowIthoughtIwasraped?"

"Huh? I'm sorry, Veronica, but what?"

She took a deep breath. "Yesterday, you made a comment about how I wasn't raped. How did you know that I thought I had been?" If she hadn't been watching him so closely, she may not have seen his face pale.

'Ah, crap! I really was that stupid, wasn't I?' He put a hand on his forehead and looked back up at the ceiling. He was trying to figure out how he could get out of this conversation, but there was no way. 'Do I lie or should I just fling open this Pandora's Box and wait for the bloodshed?'

"Okay. Here's the deal. If I lie to you, then you will hate me for lying. If I tell you the truth, you may still hate me." He sighed. "Don't hate me, Ronnie, please. Not after all this."

"You're kind of scaring me, Logan. Am I going to be able to handle this right now?" She was apprehensive. She definitely didn't want to ruin what they had, but it was obvious that there was something she needed to know.

"I hope so. The truth is, last Saturday when you drove me home from the party, I wasn't exactly, totally, quite as drunk as it may have appeared...at the time." He was looking at her with a look that said, 'Please don't kill me.'

"What do you mean, you weren't as drunk as it may have appeared? How drunk were you?" She was totally confused. She was the one taking care of him that night, he had been pretty drunk. He had even passed out on her.

"Okay, I'm really hoping to earn points for honesty here. I wasn't actually drunk at all."

"WHAT! How is that possible, Logan? You were acting drunk."

"That's just it. It was all an act. I had been really upset that Caitlin, and everyone else it seems, cheats on me and I was really emotional. Dick assumed I was drunk because of how I was acting. It just seemed easier to play it that way instead of admitting that I was being a total girl." He gave her an apprehensive smile.

"But, Dick and the other guys weren't around when you were in my car."

"Yeah, but how else was I going to get a ride home? Duncan had left and the party broke up before I could tell anyone else that I needed a ride."

"So, you kept up the act for the rest of the night? Why?" She could see his reasoning behind not wanting to expose himself to the jackasses he called his friends. She could even see his need to manipulate her for a ride home, but he had plenty of opportunity to 'sober up' after that.

"Well, I figured that the only way I would have the courage to ask you why I was such a disposable person was if I acted drunk and didn't show that I really wanted to know. I knew that you would be the perfect person to answer the question because you wouldn't lie to me and kiss my butt like everyone else. I figured that since you hated me and could care less about my opinion, I could get the brutal honest truth from you." He saw the look of shame on her face and he wished he had worded it a little differently.

"Of course, to say that I was shocked by the 'brutal honest' answer you gave me, would be the understatement of the century. Do you remember what you said to me?" When she gingerly put her face into her pillow out of embarrassment and nodded, he continued. "Veronica, you have no idea how much your words meant to me. Your kindness that night after I had treated you so horribly, reminded me of who you really are. I spent so much time demonizing you in my mind, that I forgot who you really were and I am so sorry for all of it. I missed out on so much by turning my back on you. I'll never forgive myself for everything I did and everything that I missed out on."

"That's great to hear, Logan, but none of that explains how you knew that I thought I was raped."

'Always full of questions,' he thought as he saw the look on her face. "Just before you left, you were talking to yourself, berating yourself really, about going to another 09er party." He watched as the realization dawned on her.

"Oh man. I forgot about that." She whispered.

"Are you mad at me, Veronica?" He was hoping that there was some way she would forgive him.

"Honestly, if I had known about it right after it happened, I would have been. I would have been mortified that my biggest enemy knew the one thing in the world that, more than anything, I wanted to forget about and hide from everyone. But, now, with as much as you know about me...well, it seems pointless." She shrugged.

"I can't believe you heard everything that I said that night. The only reason I said any of it was because I thought you either wouldn't remember it or you were passed out...Hey, you didn't actually pass out." She frowned at the thought.

Logan watched her, waiting for the moment she realized the full impact of that statement. He could see the wheels turning in her head and it was like waiting for the guillotine to drop. He knew it was coming when her piercing green eyes landed on his.

"Logan," she paused and had gotten completely serious. "You kissed me that night."

"Yeah." It was such a simple word, but carried such a massive amount of weight. He had looked away from her and was fidgeting a little, knowing what was coming. He wished the conversation would just end there, but this was Veronica Mars.
"Yeah? That's all your going to say? It makes no sense. If you weren't drunk, why did you kiss me?" She was asking him almost as if she didn't believe him.

He looked shy as his bottom lip jutted out a bit and he let out a long breath that made his hair flutter.

"I just, I wanted to. Then, you pushed me away and I panicked and pretended to pass out to get out of an awkward situation." He paused then smiled shyly. "So, you think it would go over if I 'passed out' now?" He yelped and then laughed when she lightly pinched the soft skin on the inside of his arm.

"What does that mean?" Her eyes were on him again.

"What does what mean?" He knew what she was asking, but was trying to stall.

"What does it mean that you wanted to kiss me?" She spoke forcefully and he knew that she wouldn't let him B.S. his way out of this one.

He put his hands on his forehead and shook his head. He was looking away from her when he finally spoke.

"I don't know what it means. All I know is that it felt wonderful, and I've wanted nothing more for the last10 days than to replay that moment. Look, I'm sorry to dump all of this on you right now, with everything else you're dealing with. I just don't know what's happened. In under two weeks, you have completely turned my world upside down. I can't sleep, I can't think of anything, except you."

"I don't know where this all came from, Ronnie. One minute I'm hating you, the next I'm imagining what would have happened if you hadn't pushed me away. Then, I'm making up ways to keep you away from Troy and excuses to be near you and spend time with you. I don't know if it's because your kindness, at a time when I was so depressed, has clouded my judgement. Maybe it has to do with spending so much time together reminiscing about the old days with Lilly. I will tell you that the whole "GameLand" outfit did NOT help matters."

"Look, I don't know what is causing it, but I am just completely crazy about you. That's it. That's all there is, and I don't expect you to return my feelings or to even to say anything really. I just don't want to ruin our renewed friendship and I don't want you to feel weird around me because of all of this." He was out of breath and just studied her for a reaction.

She hadn't moved and hadn't said anything. She just stared at him until she finally broke out in laughter.

"Great, now you're laughing at me?" He wanted to crawl into a hole.

"No," she said still giggling. "I'm laughing at us."

"I have been feeling the same exact way. I've been so confused and trying to convince myself that I was crazy. That the only reason I couldn't take my mind off of you had just been some temporary, freaky thing. I have loved every minute we've spent together since that night and it has been killing me trying to make sense of it."
"I wanted to work on Lilly's video with you, I didn't want to leave you on Homecoming night, I couldn't sleep Sunday night knowing that I would be seeing you the next morning, which is why I was at school so early. And, HEAVENS, that green shirt you were wearing yesterday was created by the gods specifically for your body."

"Really?" He was beat red now and couldn't tone down the smile on his face for anything. He couldn't believe that she had given him a chance even at friendship. Hearing her confession now, he was flying high.

"So what does this mean?" He was afraid to ask, but had to know where they stood.

She paused for a long time and he began to get nervous. "Veronica?"

"Well, it sounds like we've both been really confused by our feelings. So much has been going on, that we don't know what is real, what is just renewed friendship and what is fleeting. I suggest we just wait and see. Let's get through all of this other stuff with Troy and Duncan and the paternity issue and then see if we still feel something more than friendship for each other."

"One of the reasons that I've been pushing my feelings aside is because I knew that you would never feel anything for me. I just want to make sure that we're not misplacing feelings that will just ruin our friendship in the end. Logan, no matter what happens, I don't want to lose your friendship. Now that I have it back, I don't know if I could go through that again." She looked up at him with watery eyes.

"You won't, Ronnie. That, I will promise you. I was so stupid before and I think it's a good idea to take things slow until everything else settles down. I want to be here for you as a friend first and foremost."

"There's just one thing, though, Veronica."

"Yeah, what's that?"

"Well...if we are going to be able to give true consideration to whether we pursue a relationship beyond friendship, I think there is something we need to figure out first." He smiled coyly, put his hand under her cheek and leaned into her. "You see, I think that we should make sure that this...," he leaned closer and swept his lips lightly across hers, "is worth," he licked her bottom lip slowly, "pursuing."

As soon as the word was out of his mouth, their tongues met. It was slow and soft and intoxicating. She moaned and he increased the intensity of the kiss just enough so that he didn't hurt her. He groaned and he was burning for her. He was taking everything she would give him and wanted more. He wanted to devour every inch of her. He couldn't imagine a better feeling, and he wouldn't be able to describe it if he tried.

They slowly broke apart and separated by a couple of inches. He was still cupping her good cheek and they were staring deeply into each other's eyes.
"Wow, either the drugs are really kicking in now or that was definitely worth pursuing. My head is totally spinning." Veronica said in a dazed state.

"Well, I didn't take any of the medicine, but my head is spinning, too." He smiled at her. "Okay, as truly HARD as it is, let's get you some rest. Hopefully we'll revisit this discussion when everything settles down." He winked at her.

"That sounds like a plan." She smiled back at him shyly.

They turned off the lights and closed their eyes, both of them replaying in their minds what had just happened. Logan was wishing that they were snuggled up like they had been the night before. He yearned for her touch and warmth.

As if she knew what he was thinking, she reached over in the dark and threaded her fingers with his. "Oh, by the way, Logan. I think you meant to ask me about how indispensable you are. You could never be disposable."

He was too choked up to say anything so he lifted their joint hands and kissed her fingers. That's how they fell asleep, with joined hands and peaceful smiles.

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Serenitylovers: Thank you so much! I'm so glad you are enjoying it. It is an obsession for me. Thanks for the review.

Emjay91: Thank you. Plenty more to come. Thank you for reviewing

Lorelei Candace Black: I know you do...I almost want to tell you what's coming, but I can't!!!

09nerLoVer: I love the bi-polar responses...I love Logan/Troy's an a. Hee hee...I feel the same way.

ShmexyShmexyHinny: hee hee hee...does it make me evil that I just want to giggle?

inspiresxlove: Ah, look at you! You caught it. I slipped that in there wondering if anyone would catch it...V didn't. You're questions have been answered!

IluvVM: Thank you, stay tuned!

SaraLyleth: Thank you so much! I hope this chap gave you your fix of LoVe moments. Troy will have to wait. We will see Keith in ch. 16.

xosummerxo: Ah, you have no idea! (No, I'm not going to say anymore...you will just have to wait!)

2honest4myowngood: How was that? Got your kiss! Troy and Duncan are coming.

Literati and naley forever: Yeah, I know it's my story...but I can totally see him as the caretaker...RT just never really let him go there, but a couple of times. S2 end and GHB in S3.

Miss-Mars: Yes, my dear. You will have to wait just a little longer, but you will see. Hee hee, I can't wait.

Foreverloves: I have to agree...although, some of my favorite stories are ones where the LoVe comes out of nowhere. I just have to suspend my idea of reality when I read those stories.

LoVeElle: hmmmm...

Kaleena Mason: Thank you sooooo much. I really appreciate all of the great and enthusiastic reviews I've gotten and you've been a big part of that!

RBDFAN: Ah, Logan is my true tv love. In my opinion, no one comes close. Honestly, there are guys out there who may be hotter than he is physically. BUT, when you give me the whole package, whew! No one out there holds a candle to my Logan. :-)

AJzkitten69: Maybe that should be our mantra..."Death to Troy Vandergraff!" Lots more sweet moments to come. I can remember writing a few of these chapters when I was quite hormonal! Hee hee