Change of Heart
By Tempest Break

Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter, but I do own Colleen, Selena, Martinez, and a lot of other people of whom I am very proud.

Summary: James and Lily are finally together, but does Lily actually like James, or is she just going out with him for his sake? James vows to make her love him like he loves her, but he'll have to work hard to make Lily have a change of heart.

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Chapter Eighteen: Fading Away

James and Lily made it to the Infirmary in record time and threw open the door. Inside they found Colleen, Sirius, Remus, and Peter all gathered around one of the beds. As they approached, they could see Selena lying on the white mattress, looking paler than James had ever seen her.

"It's okay, it's okay," Selena was saying to Colleen, who looked frantic and nearly as white as she was. "It doesn't hurt, really."

"Are you sure?" asked Colleen quickly. "I could get you something. What do you want? I could read to you, or – or I could sing! 'Livin' Thing', or 'I Will Survive'?"

"Your singing might make it worse," Selena laughed faintly. "Don't worry about me, it doesn't hurt. I'm not scared."

James took a seat next to Remus, while Lily stood by Colleen, close to Selena's head. "What's the matter?" James asked Selena, his voice little more than a whisper; he felt like any more sound than that would shatter her like glass. "Why are you so sick?"

She looked at him, her gray eyes milky. "You've never known, have you?" Selena said. "Let me tell you..."

"No, Selena," said Lily, putting out a hand to stay her. "Rest. I'll tell him." She looked at James, Sirius, Remus, and Peter in turn and then began. "When Selena was little – maybe five or six years old – she contracted a deadly disease that was going around at the time, called Pureblood's Poison."

"I remember that," said Sirius, his eyebrows rising. "My uncle Ignatius got it. He died within a few weeks."

"Yes." Lily nodded. "I researched Pureblood's Poison, once I met Selena and we became friends. It's fast-killing and only affects pureblood wizards – which Selena, of course, is. It affects the immune system and the pallor of a pureblood's skin, which is why Selena is pale, almost like she's partly faded away." She cast her eyes down. "There is also no known cure for Pureblood's Poison."

"Then how is Selena still sitting here with us?" Peter inquired, quivering at the seriousness of the illness.

Lily chewed her lip nervously before continuing. "Selena was the only child in her family. Her mother, after whom she was named, died shortly after Selena was born. After that, Selena was the only reminder her father had of his beloved wife. So, when Selena was diagnosed with Pureblood's Poison, her father went to the highest extremities to keep her alive – he even committed an unholy crime to let Selena live."

Sirius inhaled sharply, suddenly understanding something. "So that silver fluid was – ?" he began.

Lily nodded grimly.

"I don't understand," said James, looking from Sirius to Lily. "What did her father do?"

"He killed a Unicorn," whispered Selena before Colleen hushed her again, telling her to rest.

James's eyes widened. "No…"

Lily nodded again. "Yes," she said. "He killed a Unicorn and extracted its blood to give to Selena to keep her alive. And he's forced her nearly every day from then on to either drink or inject the Unicorn's blood into her system so she can survive. And it's worked, though Selena has been slowly deteriorating in health. For the past few years, direct sunlight has given her searing headaches, and too much excitement causes fainting spells."

"That's why she couldn't come to any Quidditch games," Colleen explained, her nose red and sniffly.

"Damn," Sirius muttered. "You've had it rough, Selena."

Selena shrugged. "Oh, it's not so bad," she breathed. "I've had Lily and Colleen, and now you all with me. It wasn't so bad."

"So what happened tonight that made you end up here?" James asked.

"I lost my sight for a while," Selena told him. "It's happened before but not for as long as it did tonight. Everything turned white, like it does when you have heatstroke… Also, I made a decision that I've been thinking of for the past few years."

Madam Pomfrey entered the Infirmary from the back room at that point. She carried the syringe full of Unicorn blood in her hand and said grimly to Selena, "Miss Silver, I'll administer the shot now. Please roll up your sleeves."

Selena took a deep, shuddering breath and sat as straight as she could, looking Madam Pomfrey directly in the eye. "No," she said, more loudly than James had ever heard her speak.

"Selena!" exclaimed Lily and Colleen in unison.

"'No'?" repeated Madam Pomfrey.

"No," Selena said again, just as forcefully. "I don't want this to continue. It's not right."

"But Endymion will – " Madam Pomfrey began.

"My father is... He's keeping me alive only as a memory of Mother," Selena said. "Because we look the same. Because we talk the same. Because our names are the same... But we're not the same!" She trembled and sank back down into her bed at the effort of talking so loudly. "We're just not the same," she repeated insistently.

"Selena..." Colleen murmured, grasping her friend's hand. Lily took up her other.

"It's wrong what he's been doing," Selena continued, her formerly milky eyes blazing with conviction. "I can't continue with this – the slaughter of such innocent creatures to keep a long-dead memory alive – I can't bear it!"

"But Selena..." Colleen's voice broke. "But you'll die, Selena..."

Selena smiled at Colleen – a real, tooth-baring grin – and said, "Thank God."

- - - - -

It was well past midnight and still they sat with Selena. Remus, who seemed the calmest of them, stiffly reclined in a wooden chair by the bedside, Peter sitting anxiously next to him. James and Sirius sat next to Lily and Colleen respectively, who clung to Selena's hands as though the girl would fade away before their very eyes. Selena herself slept fitfully, waking up at ten- or fifteen-minute intervals. Each time her eyes opened, she seemed relieved to find all of her friends sitting around her, and she drifted back off to sleep.

Near to one-thirty, Selena woke up fully and smiled faintly at them all. "I want to say goodbye to you all," she told them. "I feel like this is the last time I'll really be up to it."

Colleen bit back a sob at her words and held Selena's hand more tightly.

"First of all, to Peter," Selena said. The twitchy boy jumped at his name and stared at her wide-eyed. "I never really got to know you, which I regret now. But the few times I shared with you, I enjoyed. And I want you to look after yourself – your friends, and thereby yourself, Peter."

"T-thank you," Peter stammered.

Selena changed her gaze to Remus. "Remus... 'Moony'... I felt like I found a kindred spirit in you."

"And I you," Remus replied readily, looking desperate to help in some way but unsure how.

She giggled softly. "Those times reading late into the night in the common room, silent except for the crackling of the fire... I appreciated them. Thank you."

Remus smiled and nodded to her.

"And Sirius," Selena continued, turning to smile at him. "What a strange person. The only one I ever knew to be a match for Colleen in syrup-chugging."

Sirius laughed and scratched the back of his head humbly. "Well, you know..." he trailed off.

"James Potter," she said, moving on to James. "The bane of Lily's existence for all her years at Hogwarts till this one. I've never known my friend to be so joyful. Thank you for making her happy, and thus making me happy. You two will make it, I can tell. I hope you'll be together for a long time."

"I do, too," replied James, squeezing Lily's free hand. "I'll miss you, dance partner."

She chuckled and looked to Lily. That was when the tears began forming, gentle moisture beading at the corners of her gray eyes. "Lily, was it really six years ago that we met? It seems like only yesterday," she said. "I can still remember being sorted, catching sight of a vibrant redhead with her nose in a book that just happened to be one of my favorites."

Lily was crying freely now, and she grasped Selena's hand in both of hers. "Selena..." she whispered.

"I love you, Lily. You were – are – my best friend, and I hope I'll always hold some part of you, too. I love you." She bit back the tears and turned her head to Colleen.

As soon as Colleen looked into Selena's eyes, a sob ripped through her chest. She fell over Selena's hand clasped in hers, holding it against her face. "No, no. Selena, no," she sobbed.

"Colleen," Selena chided, swiping at her eyes, "you're making me cry, too..."

"I can't help it!" Colleen cried. "I don't want you to die. Please don't do this, Selena!"

"I have to do this," said Selena. "Really, Colleen, I must. It's not right, what I've been putting up with all these years."

"But I don't want you to leave me and Lily..." Colleen whispered.

Selena looked at her friend sadly. "It's something I have to do," she said firmly. "Although I do have one last request for you..."

"Anything!" Colleen nearly shouted. "I'll do anything!"

"It's not so hard, I don't think," said Selena, "but it's been on my mind for so long, now, and I can't put it out. I just want you to be with Sirius."

Colleen bit her lip and nodded, tears still streaming down her face. "I'll even go out with a clown like him, Selena," she promised.

Sirius snorted indignantly but grasped Colleen's shoulder comfortingly.

"Thanks," said Selena. She breathed deeply. "Then that's all I needed to say." She looked at them all. "I thank you, everyone. Now I want you to go back to bed, please. It's late and tomorrow you have classes."

"What are you going to do?" asked James.

"I'm going to sleep," Selena answered with a contented sigh. "I'm going to sleep for a very long time..."

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Tempest: Ehehehe... Been a long time, hasn't it? Well I finally updated. I hope you guys are satisfied that the cliffhanger has been concluded, and now you all know what's up with Selena. It took me a while to actually figure out what Selena's illness was... whether it was leukemia or some made-up sickness... So yeah, I decided on Pureblood's Poison. As for how emotional Colleen is in this chapter... She was very, very attached to Selena and to all of her friends. And wouldn't you be upset if your friend was dying? I would. Anyway, that's about it. And by the way I've been updating, the next chapter will be up in like a month or two. I'm a bad, bad writer... :(

Oh, in response to some reviews... To HpLuva: Yes, I know Martinez probably wouldn't be sorted into Hufflepuff... I just put him in there because... I'm weird. Muahaha. Arwen: Thanks for your review. I read the "to who it may concern," and I was like, "Crap, this sounds like a flame..." but then it wasn't! I was so relieved! I'm glad you accepted Selena and Colleen as real characters. I'm very proud of them. Xox-PaDfOoTeSs-XoX: I hope you didn't go crazy, although I wouldn't be surprised.

And wow, I can't respond to all of these reviews tonight... It's a school night, ya know, and I have to wake up too early tomorrow. School is evil... Well, I'll "see" you all at the next update. Bye!

8-08-07: This chapter has been revamped! Hope you enjoy it more than before. Just a quick note – "Livin' Thing" is by Electric Light Orchestra and "I Will Survive" is by Gloria Gaynor.