Change of Heart
By Tempest Break
Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter. The only new thing that I own is Endymion Silver… He was kinda cool.
Summary: James and Lily are finally together, but does Lily actually like James, or is she just going out with him for his sake? James vows to make her love him like he loves her, but he'll have to work hard to make Lily have a change of heart.
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Chapter Twenty-Three: Such A Way With Words
March passed in a flurry of activity. It was that strange time of the school year during which teachers insist on piling on the homework. James and the others were swamped with Defense Against the Dark Arts reports, History of Magic essays, Transfiguration assignments, and Charms projects. And spending time with Lily was completely out of the question, because she had nearly twice the number of classes as James. Whenever James felt overwhelmed with the amount of work he had, he would glance over at Lily across the common room, find her nearly buried in books and papers, and suddenly be much humbled. After all, why should he complain when Lily did all her work without whining?
"My birthday is tomorrow!" Colleen announced happily at breakfast one morning.
Sirius nearly spat out his pumpkin juice, but instead he settled for letting it dribble down his chin as he stared at Colleen in horror and disbelief. "What?" he cried. "Tomorrow?"
"Yep," answered Colleen with a grin. "I'll be eighteen."
"And you couldn't tell me this sooner?" he demanded.
Colleen seemed surprised at him. "Well, what's the matter, Sirius?" she asked innocently. "I was just telling you all that tomorrow is the day marking that I haven't died for eighteen years! Isn't that a cheerful thing to celebrate?"
"Yes, yes it is," said Sirius dryly. "Especially when you're the birthday girl's boyfriend who hasn't even been told, much less had time to prepare a gift for the girl in question!"
"Oh, calm down, Sirius," she chided. "It's not that big a deal. I was just hoping for a quaint little celebration with only my closest gazillion friends."
Although Sirius fell silent at the time, James had to deal with him fretting during their free period as everyone else had Potions.
"Oh, what am I going to do?" Sirius moaned as they sat in the Gryffindor common room, attempting vainly to finish up their Transfiguration project. "I have to get her something. Otherwise I'll just be kicking myself for the rest of my life."
James raised an eyebrow at his best friend. "For not getting your girlfriend in Hogwarts a birthday present?"
"Yes, Prongs, that's right," Sirius snapped. "You know, for a best friend you aren't too supportive of this. You'd think for a fellow BF, you'd be more understanding."
"Does that 'BF' stand for 'best friend' or 'boyfriend'?" inquired James good-naturedly.
"It stands for 'bloody fathead'," retorted Sirius flippantly. "Now you wanna help me figure out a present for Colleen?"
James smothered a grin – he didn't expect Sirius would find anything too amusing at the moment, distressed as he was – and asked innocently, "What kind of gift do you think she would like?"
"That's just it!" Sirius wailed pitifully. "I don't know!"
"How could you not know?" James gaped at his friend. "She's you in girl form!"
"Oh, there's a lot more to her than that," protested Sirius. "She's bright and funny and a magnificent Quidditch player and…"
James rolled his eyes. "Save it for the card, Padfoot. And aren't you supposed to be stressing over her birthday present?"
"Gee, James," said Sirius in a tone dripping with sarcasm. "I'm so glad I have you as a friend to remind me when I need to completely freak out. Whatever would I do without you?"
"Just hope you'll never have to find out," said James with a wry grin.
"I'll add it to my nightly prayer," replied Sirius sardonically. He seemed to suddenly remember the task at hand. "Please, James. I need your romantic expertise. What do girls like to get for presents?"
James said thoughtfully, "Well, with Lily, I always get her books. That's really the only thing I know she'll love. Besides, I haven't had the chance to buy her anything as her official boyfriend." He smiled apologetically at Sirius. "But I don't really think Colleen's the bookish type."
Sirius groaned. "Well, you're a big help," he said. "I guess I'll just have to, I don't know… get her chocolates or flowers or some soddy thing like that." He looked so downtrodden that James felt a bit of compassion for his normally so upbeat friend.
"Look, Padfoot," said James, resting his hand on Sirius's shoulder. "After History of Magic, we'll take the Invisibility Cloak, head out of the school through the secret entrance to Hogsmeade, and get her something nice, all right? Does that make you feel any calmer?"
Sirius nodded and let out a shaky sigh of relief. "Thanks, James. You're a pal."
"Yeah, I know."
- - - - -
Directly after History of Magic, James and Sirius huddled together under the cover of the Invisibility Cloak by the statue of the one-eyed witch. James tapped the statue with his wand and hissed, "Dissendium," and the familiar dark tunnel to Honeydukes revealed itself. The two friends hurried into it, Sirius muttering the counter-spell to close the statue behind them.
The two friends pushed aside the loose stone from the Honeydukes cellar with practiced ease and slipped up the stairs. In the corner by the Toothflossing Stringmints they removed the Invisibility Cloak without fear of being seen; those candies were not the most popular.
"Now, what to get Colleen…" muttered Sirius to himself.
"I thought you were gonna get her some chocolates," James said, examining the nearby Acid Pops with apprehension.
"But chocolates are such a generic present. I want to get her something special," replied Sirius, picking up a licorice wand and eventually discarding it.
"Ah, yes," said James. "You want to get her something that relays your feelings for her, such as, 'Whoa, you are just like me,' or, 'Man, I want to snog you inappropriately in front of my friends right now.'"
Sirius made a rude gesture that James recognized as warning to shut up and help him look. James watched Sirius turn down boxes of Chocoballs, pouches of Fizzing Whizbees, packs of differently-flavored Droobles Best-Blowing Bubble Gum, and every other item Honeydukes carried.
Finally Sirius sighed. "For the first time in my life, Honeydukes has let me down," he said sadly, and he and James left the store empty-handed.
"What about Zonko's?" suggested James as they stood at a loss in the center of Hogsmeade.
"But those are all jokes!" Sirius said. "It's her birthday, and the first time I've had an opportunity to give her a gift as her boyfriend. She's been so great for the past couple months… and the whole thing with Selena…" This was followed by a short silence before Sirius shook his head to clear the sad thoughts. "I need to get her something really good."
"Well," said James, "what did you get Lela Lyndall when you were going out with her?"
"Oh, she didn't have a birthday while we were going out," Sirius replied offhandedly.
"For two years?"
"Yes, that's right," he said defensively. "She was – er – born on Leap Year Day." He sighed and ran his fingers through his hair. "But can we please focus on now? Besides, Lela and Colleen have absolutely nothing in common."
"They're both blonde," James pointed out, but inwardly he accepted that Sirius was right. Sirius's girlfriend from the beginning of third year to the end of fourth year, Lela Lyndall, had been a tall, blonde Hufflepuff, extremely curvaceous for having been only thirteen. Lela had been of the persuasion that it was unfashionable for a girl to have any personality of her own, and she had never contributed to the conversation amongst the Marauders except to giggle or say something astoundingly brainless. Listening to her talk, James had thought he could feel his I.Q. leaking out of his ear.
"That's as far as it goes," Sirius said. "Lela was gigglier, flirtier, and dumber than a giggly, flirty, dumb stick!"
"Padfoot, my friend," said James, shaking his head, "you have such a way with words."
James and Sirius returned to Hogwarts about an hour after dinner had finished. Sirius had finally found a somewhat satisfying birthday present for Colleen, even though he hadn't been really pleased with it. James and Sirius parted ways in the corridor connecting the Head Tower with the rest of the castle, and James strolled the rest of the way to his and Lily's common room, the Invisibility Cloak folded carefully and concealed beneath his robes.
He entered the common room to find a familiar sight: Lily practically swimming in books and papers. She smiled wearily at him and received a quick kiss before continuing with her homework.
"Where did you and Sirius go off to?" she inquired as she copied onto her paper the medicinal properties of fire seeds.
"He wanted to get something for Colleen's birthday," answered James, sinking back into the scarlet couch. "Her announcement today was kind of out of the blue."
"Ah, yes," said Lily. "Not to Colleen, though. She does that every year, and she's always convinced the way she presents the information is perfectly acceptable. I finally began marking her birthday on my calendar so I couldn't forget."
"Does she really expect us to throw her a party with a gazillion people?" asked James.
Lily waved it off. "Don't worry, I've already got it covered," she said. "I organized it during dinner while you guys were off. It's tomorrow night after dinner in Gryffindor Tower. I think practically all of Gryffindor House is going to participate, just like the past two years."
James nodded, wondering to himself why he'd never attended Colleen's birthday parties before. The answer came to him: Remus's transformation usually came around this time of the month. Fortunately this month, the full moon was not due for a few days – Remus might even be well enough to attend the party.
After another hour of chatting with Lily, James rose and said to his girlfriend, "Well, I think it's time to turn in." He planted a kiss on top of her head and said, "Don't stay up too late, Lily."
"I won't," Lily promised, working intently on her Ancient Runes transcription.
James smiled at the easiness of wishing his girlfriend goodnight as he headed to the door to his room. He turned back once more to call, "Goodnight, Lily," and see her glance over the back of the chair and wish him the same. Then he entered his room, closing the door behind himself.
- - - - -
The following night, a Friday, found Lily and the Marauders, along with nearly every other member of the Gryffindor House partying in the common room. Colleen, as a rather well liked person, had a marvelously done party on such short notice. James, as he gazed up at a megaphone bewitched to play only Colleen's favorite songs, suspected that Lily wasn't the only one who prepared for Colleen's birthday.
Now wherever would I get that idea? James thought wryly.
"Hey, Prongs," greeted Sirius, a paper cup filled with strawberry punch held in his hand.
"Hello there, Padfoot," replied James. "What's up? I would have thought you'd be with Colleen, doing stuff I don't care to describe."
"Yeah… good times…" said Sirius with a wistful look on his face. "I was hoping we would be, too., but I can't find her anywhere! Have you seen her?"
James shook his head just as a mighty cheer rose from the party participants. He and Sirius both looked to the top of the staircase to the girls' dormitory and found Colleen standing there with a look of fake astonishment on her face.
"I am SO SURPRISED!" she exclaimed, her hands on her cheeks and her eyes wide open.
James rolled his eyes – it was just like Colleen to want a surprise party.
But Colleen wasn't done with the act. "Oh, I'm so surprised, I think I'm going to faint!" she cried. "Someone catch me!" Then she threw herself over the banister.
James gaped. Sirius tried to make it across the common room before Colleen hit the ground, but it was useless –
Besides, a huge throng of laughing Gryffindors caught her, and Colleen was passed above everyone's head, until she came to stand just before James and Sirius, her face flushed and exhilarated. "Hot damn!" she exclaimed. "That is fun."
Lily appeared by her side, shaking her head. "Every year," she muttered.
Colleen grinned at them all. "Thanks for coming, you guys!"
"As if we wouldn't," said James.
"I got you something, Colleen," said Sirius as Peter arrived by them.
Colleen gasped. "You got me my very own Peter Pettigrew!?" she said. "You shouldn't have." She swung her arm around a very confused Peter's shoulders.
"I think Peter would actually be a better gift than this…" Sirius said sheepishly, handing her the small, wrapped box.
Colleen relinquished Peter from her hold and took the box. She tore the wrapping paper off it, removed the lid, and beheld the sterling silver pendent Sirius had bought for her. She lifted it out of the box and examined the huge blue pearl mirroring the color of her eyes.
"It's really crappy. Sorry," he apologized. "I couldn't find anything good, so I had to get you this – "
"No, Sirius, really," Colleen interrupted. "It's… beautiful." The sincere words of praise sounded strange on her tongue. She fastened the pendent around her neck and grinned up at Sirius. "Who has the bestest boyfriend in the world? I do!" She leaned up at kissed him quickly on the mouth.
"Aww," cooed some of the surrounding girls, before Colleen good-naturedly told them to sod off.
The evening passed in a flurry of laughter and merriment. Colleen had received piles of Bertie Botts' Every-Flavor Beans (her favorite candy) and was determined to eat every last box that very night. When cautioned by Lily that it might be dangerous, Colleen replied, "Bring it on. If I die, I want them to say, 'Damn, she had a lot of jellybeans!'"
Eventually, the party attendants began trailing up to the dormitories to get some shut-eye, until only James, Lily, Sirius, Colleen, Remus, and Peter were left in the common room.
"It's late," said Lily with a yawn. "I think I'm going to turn in. Happy birthday, Colleen." She headed towards the portrait hall, then stopped and looked at James expectantly. "Are you coming?"
"Oh!" said James. "Yes, of course. See you! Oh, and happy birthday, Colleen." He trotted over to Lily and they disappeared through the door.
"What an adorable couple," Peter said cynically. "I'm going to bed. I'll see you in the morning." And with that, the short, mousy boy stalked off to bed.
"Wow," said Colleen. "What's eating him? I thought he'd been having fun tonight."
Sirius stared after Peter, but said nothing.
Suddenly Remus piped up, "I think I'll follow him. See what's the matter." He dropped a friendly kiss on Colleen's cheek and wished her a happy birthday before climbing the staircase after Peter.
A short silence ensued before Sirius said, "Well, did you enjoy your party?"
"Indeed I did," answered Colleen. "But you know what it's missing?"
"What?" Sirius asked.
"A hot make-out session!" exclaimed Colleen before she threw herself on Sirius.
- - - - -
"Do you really think we ought to have left Colleen and Sirius alone?" asked James.
"What do you mean, James?" said Lily. "Remus and Peter were with them."
James shook his head. "Ah, Lily. How naïve you are," he said. "Let me make a little prediction: Peter will clear out early enough, and Remus will follow him, leaving Sirius and Colleen – two hormone-crazed eighteen-year-olds – alone in the Gryffindor common room, with no one to stop them doing whatever they want."
Lily paled briefly before saying, "You don't think they'll do anything, do you?"
James gave her a meaningful look.
"Seriously?" she asked.
"I'm just saying Sirius is an opportunist," James replied. "I can't guarantee anything."
"But… But Colleen's a responsible witch," said Lily. "She's capable of stopping things if they go too far."
James and Lily stared at each other a minute before Lily sighed. "I'm a baaad Head Girl…"
- - - - -
Sirius gasped for breath – Colleen hadn't been kidding. It was a hot make-out session; probably hotter than they'd had before, although Sirius wasn't placing any bets: His and Colleen's relationship was definitely not the most communication-based in the world.
But then, why should they need to talk? Sirius already knew everything Colleen had to say, because it was the same as what he had. If it weren't for the obvious physical differences and the fact that they both knew who their parents were, Sirius would have bet they were long-lost siblings.
Then this would be incest, Sirius thought to himself as he ran his hand up Colleen's leg. Thank God for family trees…
The feeling of Colleen's fingers on his abruptly naked chest startled Sirius not a little – it wasn't as though he hadn't felt them there before, but for some reason he'd always gotten the somewhat reassuring feeling that they were winding down. Not so this time. If anything, it seemed she was just warming up.
So am I, he groaned inwardly – his body was reacting in the healthy, eighteen-year-old-boy way, and it wasn't making conscious thought very easy.
Apparently, Colleen had noticed it, too. "Getting a bit excited there, Sirius?" she asked in between kisses. He could only groan in response. She kissed him deeply, her fingers playing over his chest. "Don't worry," she whispered. "I think we can do something about that…"
Sirius's eyes flew open and stared at her. "W-What??" he sputtered. "What do you mean!?"
"Well, I don't mean a Dousing Charm," she answered suggestively.
"Uhh… Did you get a firewhisky-flavored jellybean, by any chance?" Sirius asked.
"Hah, you wish," she said. "If I had, we would have already" – she murmured in Sirius's ear exactly what they would have already done – "twice."
Sirius gulped. "Twice?" he repeated. "That's a bit, erm, ambitious, isn't it?"
"Mm-hmm." Colleen kissed him again, her fingers trailing down to the waistband of his pants.
Sirius broke the kiss abruptly. "Whoa, whoa," he said, forcing himself to think clearly. "What – ? How – ? When did you – ? I can't be – ! Oh, screw it…" He pulled Colleen back down to him and, he had to admit, got the best "thank you for coming to the party" present ever.
- - - - - - - - -
Tempest: Uhh… hehe… (sheepish grin) Hope you guys don't get all upset about the content of that chappie… It's kinda pushing the rating, but I don't REALLY think it's explicit enough to be R, so I'm keeping it PG-13 (Pretty Good, if you're 13). Oh, and uh, yeah… this chapter is kinda long. They've been getting kinda on the long side because I want to wrap up this story in as few chapters as possible and hopefully by the end of the summer. (crosses fingers) Wish me luck. By the way, I've gotten over 200 pages for this thing on Word. How crazy is that? Now to answer some reviews.
Ruth3: Yes, it was a bit predictable… but I still had to do it. To Cherry: You're right, I did used to like Sailor Moon… it was my first anime. But I actually wasn't thinking of that at all when I wrote about Endymion. I was just thinking of old Greek mythology (one of my passions), in which Selene is the goddess of the moon and Endymion is the shepherd she falls in love with… But yeah, you were right. Sammy Solo: I'm glad you liked the ending to the Remus/Selena thing, and that you thought James was funny. My friend had said something similar to me ("I'll be right back. I'll be really fast, like… lightning… man!"), and I'd thought it was hysterical, so I tweaked it and put it in here. If you guys haven't noticed, a lot of the funny lines I've taken from stuff my friends say. Sum1strange: Remus was in the library sulking. Let's just call it what it was. He was sulking. To lulu: What Endymion meant by "She loved you, too": Endymion, seeing as he knew his daughter well, could feel accurately that Selena had loved Remus exactly as he loved her. Now, how Remus loved her, THAT is the question:P RietroFan42: Haha! A fellow Rogue/Pietro fan?? No way. Anyway, in response to your question, I found out that James is in fact a Chaser (the Harry Potter Lexicon is a beautiful thing), but I'd already made him a Seeker in this story, so… I was kinda out of the loop. See, here's the loop, here am I. Notice how I am not in the loop. You wanna be in the loop, but I was out of the loop. Yeah. MWPP Fanatic: Thanks for your kind words about the relationships. I hope you still feel that Sirius and Colleen are cute and not horny little bunnies… To heluvsmeheluvsmenot: Haha, apparently you can do it without logging in… blush It's not good enough to be in hardcover… Stop, you're embarrassing me! Legolas' Girl: Yeah, I wanted to update exactly a year after I'd started. Kind of a commemoration thingee… Yeah… Whoopee, one year! StarRuby: I know, Endymion had never met Remus… I hope it was explained in sum1strange's answer.
And to DracozFallenAngel, FrEgOrGeLuVeR225, emilydacat, OrlandoPotter13, Ohepelss Oramtnci, snowbabyjoe, milky way bar, Starling94, starburstsweetie, Lily Natalia Evans, vamperfly, Wind Whisperer, glakistry (hi Irene!), Silvercrystal77, Si-FiAddict246, alex, jsas (hallo there Jane—you have a hott step-cousin), Nikki Gryffin, Individual-9086, raven, Kyo-grli91, and sumwhere-over-the-rainbow: Thank you all SO MUCH for reviewing. I hope you continue to do so for the rest of your lives. Hehe.
Well, buhbye everyone. And review, review, review!
8-18-07: This chapter has been revamped! Hope you enjoy it more than before.